I both apologise and don't apologise for this XD

It was just a bit of pointless fluffy/sinful fun that popped into my head during a conversation with one of my tumblr buddies. I rated it as M just to be on the safe side.

Chat Noir- Laundry Thief

It was an innocent enough question. Simple. Domestic.

"Adrien," Marinette called. Her husband's name floated from her place in their walk-in-wardrobe, to where he sat sprawled on their double bed "have you seen my black panties?"

There, see? Totally innocent…

So why was Adrien currently chuckling? Years of being in a relationship with the cat-like superhero told Marinette that it was nothing good, so she couldn't be blamed for the sudden trepidation she felt.

"Why?" He asked "are they missing, Princess?"

There was something so frustratingly smug in his tone that Marinette stood up straight, slammed her underwear drawer shut, and stomped back into their bedroom with a loud fussy huff. Her grumpy reaction only served to widen the smile on his lips, his eyes sparkled in delight, like a cat that got the cream. This only served to further convince the dark-haired heroine that the only way you could get a superhero to kill someone would be to get them marry another superhero and just wait a year or so.

"What did you do?" She asked crossing her arms and tapping her foot. Checking the clock by their bedside was not a good idea, it only served to remind her she did not have time for this. Her husband was fully dressed in his tux, but she was still wrapped in a towel. Sure her hair and makeup were done but it would hardly be appropriate for her to show up to the Agreste Charity Auction wearing a towel. The press would have a field day!

Adrien ignored the danger in his wife's voice as he threw his legs over the side of the bed and stood up slowly. Adjusting the collar of his jacket in a very model-like manner, he sidled up to her whilst still wearing that smile. At any other time Marinette would have found it to be hot as hell. Not this time however. Urge to kill rising…

"Uh-oh, now who's the oblivious one?" He responded with a wink which hit her like a train. Her memories of a conversation from the previous week flooded her mind; an eventless patrol across the Parisian rooftops had had them reminiscing about days gone by. She'd teased him for being oblivious to her obvious crush on him during their school years together, and in his embarrassed state he vowed to prove she was just as oblivious as him…

Oh no.

"Adrien Agreste," Marinette choked, feeling both a sense of panic and dread fill her, her arms dropped to her sides "What. Have. You. Done. With. My. Panties?!"

He pretended to ponder the question, eyes glancing at the ceiling as he 'thought' about his answer.

"Hmm…well I did see a very naughty cat come by and steal them, along with all of the other panties that can go with the dress you plan to wear," his eyes snapped back to Marinette's, burning her with his smoldering look of triumph. Oh how she wanted to punch him straight in his Cheshire-cat face! The last time she'd accidentally worn the wrong type of panties with a dress, every shady tabloid in town had posted images of her and her obvious panty line. It had been mortifying and Adrien KNEW she never wanted to repeat that mistake again.

"So you've stolen and hidden my laundry?! You- you rotten alley cat!" She spluttered angrily and, to add insult to injury, he kissed her rapidly reddening cheek and traipsed out of the room with a snicker.

"Well you better hurry up and find them Mrs. Oblivious, we have to leave soon. Clock's ticking!"

Despite the fact he had to duck out of the path of a pillow hurtled his way, Adrien was still laughing as he made his way downstairs. For the next half an hour he heard many a curse word and a lot of thundering footsteps coming from their bedroom as Marinette frantically searched for her missing panties.

When she finally came downstairs, fully clad in a soft black dress which clung to her curves, Adrien was waiting in the entrance hall to their apartment. Offering her coat as a gesture of peace, the corners of Adrien's mouth turned upwards when Marinette stepped into it wordlessly. Her expression was unreadable. He missed the warning signs.

"So did you find what you were looking for?" He asked casually, as if he were a cashier and she was his customer. Marinette simply adjusted her hair, making sure it wasn't caught in the hood of her coat. She opened the door and stepped into the foyer.

"No," She grimaced as she called the elevator "but I can handle it,"

He wanted to ask what she meant but he didn't want the simple prank to get out of hand and hurt her feelings. So instead he tentatively wrapped his arm around her, sighing when she leaned into his embrace. They often played pranks on each other, often teased, yet Adrien was always worried that one day he'd over step the mark. So far so good, though he was certain she'd get him back eventually.

Oh if only he knew… well they did say curiosity killed the cat.

The taxi ride to the Shangri-La hotel (where the charity auction was being held) was mostly spent in calm silence, yet every moment felt as though someone was poking and prodding Adrien, a little devil on his shoulder wanting to know exactly how Marinette had solved the panty problem. Every time he went to ask her the question, it died on the tip of his tongue until eventually, he couldn't take it anymore. Once they arrived at the hotel, he opened his door and hurried to Marinette's side to let her out.

"Ok you have to tell me; do you have a panty line right now?" He murmured in her ear, rambling as he awkwardly stumbled over his words "because it was just a stupid prank and I know you don't want to be embarrassed so we can always go back home quickly and I can show you where I hid them and god look at me now I'm getting my panties in a bunch!"

Marinette raised her eyebrow at him, her blue eyes took in his flustered state. For a split second Adrien thought she was going to tell him off-

But then she smirked.

It was in that moment, as his wife leaned up and touched his shoulder for support whilst her lips brushed against his ear, that Adrien knew he'd screwed up. He'd screwed up big time. He'd played with fire and she was going to burn him alive.

"You know, mon minou" she whispered, her breath tickled his ear, her voice was pure sex as she fought down her own evil chuckle "it would be very hard for me to have a panty line right now…"

Adrien swallowed, a dying man approaching the guillotine "w-why's that?"

She rested back on her heels and spoke so quietly that he almost didn't hear her. But he did. He'd heard it. And the next day it was his bright red face splashed across the tabloids; headlines gushing about his 'romantic gazes' towards his wife, how much he's 'still struck dumb by her beauty'. Of course that was all true, however that wasn't the reason he was rooted to the spot for a solid thirty seconds, his eyes wide as he willed all his blood AWAY from certain areas. No it was because Marinette's words echoed in his mind, making him want to do…something. Something which he really shouldn't do in public.

"I'm not wearing any."

The evening was going to be torture.

"Son," The voice of Gabriel Agreste piped up from behind Adrien, making him jump about a foot in the air. He whirled around and tried to wipe the guilt from his expression, like he hadn't just been ogling his wife's hips (and imagining the pantyless skin behind the thin layer of her dress) whilst she made small talk with the Mayor. Nope. That was not what he was doing at all "a word please."

Adrien excused himself from whoever he was talking to (he was far too distracted to notice) and followed his father to the edge of the bar, where the after party was taking place. A small, intimate room with no more than fifty people. The lighting was low and the bar was steeped in modern, shiny black furniture. Usually, it was a place Adrien wouldn't have minded being. This evening it might as well have been a prison cell as desperate as he was to get home.

Gabriel's eyes scanned the room, making sure everyone was wrapped up in their own conversations and the staff were engaged in other activities. A sense of dread filled Adrien as his father focused back on him, so he grabbed one of the free glasses of champagne from a tray resting atop the bar, taking a quick swig for courage. Why do I get the feeling I'm about to be scolded?

"The next time you come to one of my parties, might I suggest a cold shower beforehand, or perhaps some alone time with your wife?"

So much for liquid courage, the champagne previously in Adrien's mouth was now sprayed across the bar where he'd spat it out in shock. He turned his wide eyes to his father, who was coolly observing him as though he hadn't just said the most mortifying thing on the planet.


Gabriel raised his eyebrow at how completely undignified his son looked at that moment. His lips twitched.

"You're lucky that you can still pass for newlyweds," He went on, removing his glass and wiping down the bits of champagne Adrien had sent his way "everyone was commenting on how sweet it was that you couldn't take your eyes off Marinette this evening. That grace period won't last forever son, eventually people will start deeming it inappropriate," He rested a hand on Adrien's shoulder and Adrien noticed his father's eyes fixate on his mother, who was casually talking to an up-and-coming fashion designer, laughing loudly "trust me on that."

Kill me. Kill me now. Adrien implored to the heavens. Of course it was his black-cat bad luck which meant his prayer was unanswered.

"O-ok Father, thanks so much for the advice! I'll bear that in mind heh heh! Gotta go now see ya around soon!" air, need air. Without another word, Adrien wheeled around and rushed outside to the deserted balcony. The cold air smacked him in his burning face. He tried to calm himself down. The Eiffel tower shone down at him from across the Seine and he wandered to a secluded corner. Resting his back against the wall, Adrien sighed with relief.

From his pocket came a light teasing chuckle and Adrien groaned, running his hands down his face as Plagg floated out and hovered inches from his nose.

"You got told off by your dad!" the black Kwami cackled.

"Shut up Plagg," Adrien whined with a childish pout.

"Take a cold shower! Hahahaha!" Plagg ignored him, laughing as he span in the air and Adrien knew he was never going to hear the end of this one. So he might as well drag Plagg down with him.

"Well sorry to curdle your cheese buddy," He grinned "but that wasn't the only bit of advice my dad gave."

Plagg stopped dead in his tracks. The laughter died on his lips. With his ears flattened against his head, Plagg began to float away from Adrien, shaking his head as he did so.

"Don't you dare-" He began but Adrien cut across him.

"Plagg, transform me!"

Marinette was getting worried. She hadn't seen Adrien in a little while. Sure she'd loved the way his gaze had practically burned a hole in her dress throughout most of the evening, but she'd noticed him speaking to his father and then Gabriel returned back to the main huddle of people sans son by his side. A guilty weight dropped on her chest. The thought occurred to her that perhaps her teasing had gotten her husband in trouble, so she sought him out to apologise.

When she was unable to find him in the bar, she decided to check the balcony instead. It was cold enough out there that people were avoiding it, the lights weren't even on so Marinette's eyes had to blink to adjust to the darkness. She wrapped her hands around her arms tightly to shield them from the chill. Goosebumps formed where her hands were unable to cover. For some reason, she felt as though she were being watched and her heartbeat doubled in speed.

"Adrien?" She called softly "are you out here?"

From out of the darkness, a hand snaked around her waist and Marinette had to fight her fighting instincts. A split second later she glanced up, her eyes met retroreflective green ones, and Chat Noir pulled her tighter. Using his baton to lift them up into the air, they landed gently on the rooftop a few stories above. The gravel crunched beneath Marinette's heels as she attempted to remove herself from Chat's embrace and ask him just what he thought he was doing. Chat was having none of it.

"You know Princess," He purred in her ear "it's very difficult to resist you when you're dressed like that."

Marinette sighed, tilting her head to accommodate his lips against her neck. Suddenly the cold night air didn't bother her.

"You know Chat Noir," She retorted with a playful grin, even as his teeth grazed her skin "I'm a married woman now, and I don't intend to cheat on my husband. Especially not with a low-life laundry thief."

Chat Noir pretended to gasp. His hands snaked down to her hips and Marinette could feel the smile on his lips as they trailed up her neck and back to her ear. She sighed, her fingers playing with his belt.

"I'm sure your husband would understand, and besides you haven't told me to stop yet," his growl was low as Marinette's fingernails scraped against his waist. She felt him shudder and knew she couldn't stop if a meteor hit "and as for the thieving, well that was a simple prank. You're the one that turned it into something much more sinful."

Marinette placed her hand under his chin and pushed back so that she was looking into his eyes. The moon was behind the clouds, the only light was from the tower, but she could still see the want in his demeanour. His chest was heaving as he fought with his baser instincts. Knowing exactly what he wanted, Marinette couldn't help but bite her lip, secretly thrilled by her effect on him. It was a power not even her miraculous could grant, but it was a power she possessed nonetheless.

"If it was so sinful, mon minou," she whispered, knowing she was pushing her luck and knowing what her next words would bring "then why aren't you kissing me right now? I thought I'd driven both you wild with anticipation," she sighed falsely "I suppose I must be losing my touch and-" her next words were muffled by his lips against her own and she closed her eyes against him.

Chat's kisses were hungry, primal and ravenous. They made her knees weaken as he picked her up and pushed her into the wall of the fire escape. A clawed hand lifted Marinette's wrists and pinned them above her head. The other free hand clung to her hip, scratching against the point where her thigh met her torso and Marinette moaned, hating the barriers of clothing between them.

"You tease," She gasped between kisses. Chat chuckled and god help her if it wasn't the sexiest noise she'd ever heard.

"Look who's talking," He shot back "I do believe it is your lack of underwear that caused this scenario to begin with My Lady."

"Laundry thief."


"Shut up and kiss me some more," Marinette broke free of his hold and wrapped her arms around his neck, pulling them so close you could not tell where one body started and another began. Black against black, skin against skin, their tongues danced together. Marinette lifted a leg and wrapped it around him. Chat pressed his hips to hers, grinding against her. His hand gripped her thigh, squeezing tightly. The superhero almost forgot himself entirely as she played with his hair, one hand scratching against his cat ear. A low growl rumbled in his throat. Marinette's heart pounded erratically, completely caught up in the wildness of it all. Breath failed her. Her mind and body drowned in desire as Chat broke their kiss to trail down to the neckline of her dress, kissing and nipping so lightly that it almost made her angry. She wanted more, she needed more, please give me more she said wordlessly with the arching of her back.

"I want you," He whispered against her heart, leaning up and breathlessly pressing himself against her once more "all of you, Princess."

"Have it then," Marinette panted "take me home Chat Noir, and have all of me. Only let me look into my husband's eyes when you do so."

He smiled then, the growl replaced with a purr and he pressed a much more tender kiss to his wife's lips. Reaching up to caress her cheek with his thumb, Adrien finished the kiss with a brief peck on his wife's freckled nose.

"That can most definitely be arranged," He lifted her into his arms once more as he carried her to the side of the building. He didn't think he'd ever been so eager to get home. His body tingled with the rush of adrenaline, the heat of desire. He kissed her once more.

"Wait," she halted him as he prepared the leap and he knew that he would be unable (for perhaps the first time) to agree to her request if she suggested doing the honourable thing by returning to the party to say goodnight. Not when she was in his arms, not when her hair was disheveled that way, her lips red and swollen from his kisses, especially not with the way she was looking at him now with flushed cheeks and glazed eyes. He was only one man. A superhero sure, but a man nonetheless "your father's going to notice that we've gone, surely we have to come up with some sort of excuse?"

Chat Noir sighed in relief, nuzzling his wife with a simple smirk.

"It's alright," he replied "I'll just tell him we went home to have a cold shower."

*fans self*

In the daytime, I'm Midnightstarlightwrites, just a normal girl who writes fluffy fanfic, but there's something about me no-one knows yet. Because I have a secret.

*to the miraculous theme song tune* I AM SIN TRASH!

Well I guess you guys know that now...ehehe *sweats nervously*

Until the next time! Xx