Chapter One

The Spontaneous.

I couldn't stop giggling as I watched Natsu pull on the bright, offending piece of fabric, unclipping the two buttons at the end of the sleeves. My laughter increased when he turned around and I noticed the word 'Champion' scribbled over the back in a bright diamante font.

The bright baby blue clashed with his hair and the suit was hanging off his trim and lean body like a thick winter coat, but none of that mattered because when he turned around, and gave me that wide fanged grin, I thought he looked beautiful.

He fiddled with his scarf, his movements sloppy as I leaned against the wall, trying to ignore the feel of cheap mesh fabric scratching against my bare stomach.

"Are we seriously doing this?" I slurred happily, my world spinning wildly with the amount of alcohol I had ingested. I adjusted the puffy sleeve of the fluro pink dressed I had chosen from the rack, which reached below my knees in an odd fashion and squeezed my chest against each other to the point of pain.

But I didn't care.

I didn't care that I looked absolutely horrible, or that we were both smashed beyond capable thought, that Natsu looked like he was about to faint from alcohol poisoning, or the dull ringing of my spirits that were no doubt about to talk me out of the situation we had both entered into.

What was that situation again?

I glanced around, almost tipping over if it wasn't for the wall I leaned against. White fake crystal fixtures, a reception desk with two bright pink and purple bouquets, another couple, also dressed in ridiculous get up, in the corner, making out passionately.

Oh right.

Natsu beamed, and said something that I deduced foggily was; "Damn right we are!"

I burst into more laughter at his enthusiasm, although, I didn't quite get all of his crumbled speech. Instead I just stumbled over to him and he caught me, his laughter joining mine. We leaned against each other, struggling to stay standing as I heard a chirpy voice coo, "They are ready!"

We both looked up to Happy who was looking dashing in a pair of dog ears, and a black mustache. Just seeing him made us both keel over in more laughter and Happy grinned, completely at ease with his costume.

"Let's do this." I held up my hand and Natsu high-fived it sloppily, and we began to stagger to the doors that Happy had started to push open. I used the chairs on either side to support my flailing dizzy body, watching in glee as Natsu managed to trip over nothing and land on his face. I pulled him up weakly, "Gosh, so smooth."

Somewhere inside me, I think that was a lot more jumbled than I meant it to be but Natsu answering proud grin, made it vanish from my mind. The tingling on my hip where my keys was growing more intense so with a soft giggle, I unclipped them from my belt and handed them to the only sober being I could find.

"Happy, look - hiccup - after mem keysssss." The cat snickered and took them gently, "Okay Lushi!"

I patted him on the head, amused when he almost smacked the floor as Natsu grabbed my hand and steered me closer to the end of the passage way, where two people were standing, watching us both with faces.

They have faces.

Nodding, at my apt description of their strange faces, we reached them as one of them asked, "Is this everyone?"

Natsu laughed, "Nice one!"

I laughed along with him - mostly at him - because I was sure he didn't understand what the guy had said. Happy hovered above us, and chirped, "This is them."

"Good. Shall we get started?"

Natsu and I let out roars of agreement, and I leaned into him heavily, my legs loosening their fight to stay upright. He hefted me easily, wrapping an arm around my waist as I noticed a faint smile on the mans face.

"Alright then." He cleared his throat and bliss, joy and other wild emotions thrummed inside me.

"Dearly beloved, we are gathered here today..."

Something was hammering into my head. Or it was hammering in my head.

Either way, something was hurting me from the inside out.

I groaned, twisting in my dream to get away from the sound of a marching band that seemed to be getting louder.

And louder.


I jolted up in bed, and the marching band took a break for split second which was welcomed as I blinked wearily. My throat was sore, and tight, like I had swallowed rusty nails. Last time I checked, I wasn't Gajeel so that option wasn't likely. My bones were heavy and my teeth felt like they had been pulled individually.

My skin was burning, aching and I swear, my ass felt like it was about to fall off from the pain. I groaned, as the marching band began its crescendo again, beating, pulsing. I coughed wearily, holding my head and wiping my mouth from the drool that had dribbled down my cheek in my sleep.

It was too warm, too loud, and too messy in my body and in this room.


I looked around through stilted eyes that weren't ready for the sunlight yet which seemed to be blaring into the strange room. It was a hotel room, I foggily remembered buying it last night after Natsu and I finished a job.


I checked beside me, not there. I scanned the room, my eye sight cloudy with misty tears of pain. I found the pink mop of hair, slouched face down over a chair, his cheek resting against the carpet and his feet in the air.

That did not look comfortable.

I giggled then regretted it as the marching band added a trombone to the mix, grinding my teeth together as I took full notice of the mess of the room. Bottles of liquor lined every corner, a circle of plastic cups and four types of heavy vodka's in the middle, most spilled over and leaking into the carpet.

Peices of bright clothing and food scraps spewed around the room, a trail of bright blue leading into the bathroom.



Ignoring the mess - and the massive bill we were going to get - for a moment, I tried to find the furry companion that was the third member of our team but came up empty. I blinked wearily, before assuming he was asleep in some drawer or in the bathroom.

When I glanced down at myself, I blanched.

What the flip was I wearing?

A bright pink dress, if you could call it that, hung strangely off my body. I was used to looking cute in pretty much anything but damn, this was horrible. There was a mesh netting over my stomach, scratching me uncomfortably and I screwed my face up at the puffy sleeves that were crumpled awkwardly.

I ran a hand through my hair weakly, before gasping in pain as it caught on something around my finger. I didn't usually wear rings or anything but then again, I didn't wear bright fluro things either.

I brought my other hand up to the tangle, scrunching my nose when I noticed it was slightly sticky as I managed to untangle the ring from my knotty hair. I brought it down to my face and my eyes widened.

It was on my wedding finger.

I inspected it with forced calmness, a soft gold color with a pink crystal in the middle, multiple smaller white crystals on either side. I tilted my head before breathing in once, calmly, Just because it's on my ring finger, doesn't mean anything.

From what I can see, and can't remember, I was pretty smashed last night.

But that left the question on who bought me this ring.

I glanced at Natsu's storing form, a smile tweaking on my lips a little at his position again, before bringing my hands into my lap, fiddling with the ring quietly. I tried not to think about it, the marching band was only get louder with any thoughts and just climbed out of bed wearily, almost buckling at the burning pain through my ass.

I cursed, moving my hand around to rub at my left cheek but snatched my hand away when the pain began to sting even more.

Don't touch it.

Even that thought made the marching band louder and more ferocious in it's noise.

I had to get changed, and shower, and feel somewhat alive.

I began to stagger to the bathroom, dodging the mess along the way when I stopped, finally noticing Natsu's clothing. I blinked, once, twice.

I thought my dress was bad.

Natsu was wearing a bright baby blue tux, with a ruffled shirt that made his scarf sit awkwardly around his neck. The damn thing was a fashion tragedy, even his usual baggy pants outfit was better than that.

I pushed my lips together, fighting another giggle before hearing a voice that made me jump, "Lushi! You're up!"

I turned around, wincing, "Not so loud Happy, my head."

The blue cat hovered in front of me, wearing a bright grin that immediately settled me. Glad to see somebody was responsible last night.

"Natsu and you drank a lot of booze last night." He oh-so helpfully informed me as I corrected him weakly, "You and Natsu, Happy. You and Natsu."

Now he looked confused. "I didn't drink anything."

I sighed, waving the conversation away and began my trek to the bathroom when seven words stopped me still, "You look horrible in that wedding dress."

My heart began to pound, my eyes went wide and my head began to shriek, adding to the noise already booming in my head. I turned to him slowly, "W-wedding dress?

He nodded, "I tried to get you to wear a white one but you and Natsu decided that the pink one looked the greatest."

I couldn't even commend him on his proper use of grammar, instead clearing my throat, the burning increasing with the action, "Happy, what exactly happened last night?"

Even though I dreaded the answer, even though some part of me knew, that it wasn't the one I wanted. I still asked.

And wished I didn't.

Happy seemed oblivious to my inner turmoil and cocked his head at me, "You don't remember?"

I shook my head slowly, and he frowned for a second before it vanished.

"You and Natsu got married!"

I nodded calmly, already assuming the worst but hoping for the best. Hope didn't work this time.

A scream ripped out of my throat before I could stop it, as Natsu's lax body jumped to attention, trying to gather himself onto his feet but instead landing in a heap in front of me. I continued to scream until I was sure, I was blue with breath exertion as Natsu cried out, "Fuck! What's wrong? Who do I need to bash? Fuck, why is my head screaming?"

"It's Lucy that's screaming, Natsu." Happy chimed, looking at me worriedly, as Natsu's head turned towards me. But all I could do was stare at him, my scream stopping short when I noticed the glimmer of something on his hand.

A ring.

"Oh my god!" I shouted, before rushing into the bathroom, slamming the door with a loud crack that woke me up completely. I sunk down onto my ass, shaking as I whispered frightfully, "I married Natsu. He's my husband. We married."

"Lucy!" The door pounded and I jumped, another small scream ripping from my throat, "Lucy, what's wrong? Are you okay?"

"Look at your hand Natsu!" I shouted back, closing my eyes as he was quiet.

"I don't usually wear rings." He croaked, sounding like he was in pain as Happy stated slowly, "Yeah... but you have to wear that ring because you married Lucy last night."

It was silent, so silent I could hear my own blood pulse through my veins before Natsu stated, "Well, fuck."

I buried my head between my knees, shaking as Happy murmured, "Aye, Lucy let us in."

"Yeah Luce, we can talk about this. Figure it out." Natsu said softly, and I sniffled, tears swimming my vision at their gentle words, and I scuttled away from the door, reaching up to open it a little.

I sat against the porcelain end of the bath, my back to the cold tiles. My ass still stung like crazy, but the cold was making it bearable. I shifted a little, hiding my face when the door creaked open. Natsu crawled in and Happy hovered above me, "Nee, Lushi, are you okay?"

I shook my head weakly, shaking as Natsu whispered, "Do you need some water?"

I did need some water, but I couldn't say anything.

Not yet.

I felt like death.

"Natsu, help her." Happy mumbled urgently as Natsu hissed back, "I don't know how."

"Well she's your wife dummy, so figure it out!" Happy snapped and then everything bubbled up. I turned around swiftly and vomited, every feeling that had happened last night. Happy made a disgusted sad noise but Natsu remained quiet, only pulling my hair back and placing a tentative hand on my back, softly rubbing as I heard him whisper, "Go get her a glass of water."

Once he left and I had emptied my stomach, I leaned my head against my hands and whispered, "Can you remember if we did anything last night?"


"Besides getting married Natsu, did we do anything?" I struggled not to hit him, because I wasn't well enough to ask the obvious question that had been playing on my mind. He was quiet before mumbling, "No. I don't think we did. Are you... sore or hurt?"

I sighed in relief that he understood what I was asking - partly surprised since he was quite oblivious to those things. I took a moment to run a check over my body, more importantly the place between my thighs and nothing hurt or ached. I assumed that was a good thing.

My ass still stung like crazy though, "I'm not sore anywhere obvious but my right ass cheek is killing me."

Whether he found my honesty funny or my situation, I didn't know but when I heard him chuckle, I couldn't help but smile a little.

I giggled, he snickered. We both burst into laughter that made my stomach ache. I turned around and he leaned against the bath next to me, taking off his jacket and handing it to me.

I eyed it, as he grinned cutely, "For your ass."

I rolled my eyes, shoving him as we both erupted into more laughter. I tucked it underneath my butt, alleviating some of the pressure as Happy returned with my keys and a glass of water. I took them, sending him a grateful smile as he plopped down opposite us.

I took a long drink, before handing it to Natsu who finished it off. Happy studied the both of us, "So you both really don't remember?"

I shook my head as Natsu sighed, "I remember playing the shot game, and then stopping at this jewellery shop. Then, outside the chapel."

"So we got married in a chapel?" I asked as Natsu shrugged, "That's all I can remember, I don't know if we went in there or not."

"You did." Happy informed us, "We waited for two hours before they could, um... marry you. I've got the wedding certificate in my bag."

"Oh." I whispered, dread filling me as he began to rifle through my bag, "I also have a note for you Lucy."

"For me? From whom?"

Happy pulled out a piece of paper, "Well, you were pretty drunk. When you both came up with the idea of getting married, you stole a piece of paper from the reception and hid in the bathroom for a bit. Came back and said to give this to you tomorrow morning."

"It's a note from drunk me?" I summarized, and he grinned, "Aye!"

I took the note with shaky hands as Natsu murmured, "I'm going to take a shower in the other bathroom. We will leave you alone Luce." He stood up weakly and I smiled, "Thanks guys."

Once they left, and shut the door after them, I took a deep breath in and opened the letter.


If I know myself, and I do, since I am you, you are probably freaking out right now. Because if everything went right, you got married. Like, married married. You drank a lot, so did Natsu.

We both got agreed for jumping into the trifle fountain, and when Happy came to bribe the policeman to get us out, something happened. You were in one cell, Natsu was in the other. And you were looking each other. He looked at you, like, I dunno, like we were his favourite thing in the world.

And he was yours.

When you finally got out, he was closer. I dunno how to explain it. You felt closer. When you walked this by little jewellery place, you saw this ring. We both saw it. And the next thing you knew, he was waking up the owner and buying you the ring. You got him one also, but it didn't matter because walking out of that shop, things changed.

He made you happy, happier than you ever felt.

You both decided, the only way you could possibly wear these rings, is through marriage. He thought it was a great idea, you thought he was insane. He is, but that made him more lovable. We, you, I - damn this is confusing - is a weird person.

When you told him that, he said that it made us more lovable.

Now you are sitting in the bathroom at the chapel, and I'm writing this letter to you, to me, to take a moment to breath. We, Heartfilia's are overthinkers. Have an aspirin, because let me tell you something.

When he smiled at you, it felt like you were his light.

And plus, let's face it, he's not exactly ugly is he ;)

You've already asked him to have sex with you, to which he said 'no' because you were both absolutely smashed. But he looked cute when he admitted he wanted to be completely sober if you ever gave him the chance again.

I hope you will. I really, we really, want to have sex with him.

Please have sex with him.

Happy has tried to talk you both out of it, twice, so don't be mad, but something you said made him give up trying. He looked like he was in joy, pity I can't remember what I said.

Furthermore, on the off chance you ignore all my splendid advice, I made a sneaky clause in the marriage vows and certificate so you guys can't get divorced right away. You'll see it, and either love yourself or hate yourself.

P.S, your ass is probably burning, I'd check that out as soon as you possibly could ;)

Love, Lucy. You. Me. I.

Ugh. Whatever.

I blinked at the note wearily, completely shocked and unable to speak. Instead I just folded it calmly and closed my eyes.

Did that all really happen?

Or was it just me, overthinking it, even when I was drunk?

My heart melted a little, reading what I described Natsu as and realised, he was almost always smiling at me. So what is this smile, that I've never heard of before.

I blushed when I read the little tangent about how I wanted to have sex with him and he said no, smiled a little when I found out why.

Good lord.

What am I supposed to do?

I'd have to read the marriage certificate, see what I had stupidly put in the clause of our marriage but something more pressing was playing on my mind.

Why did I put a winky face at the end when it mentioned my ass? I stood up shakily, placing the note on the sink and turned around a little, so I could see my ass in the reflection.

I lifted the dress up and my eyes bulged, at the word tattooed into my right ass cheek, Natsu.

Oh my fucking god!

I yanked my dress back down with a squeak, I got a tattoo of Natsu's name, on my ass.

On my fucking ass.

I heard the shower in the other room turn off and turned mine own, in a state of disbelief as I undressed and climbed in. I winced in pain at the sting of the water sliding over the tattoo. A ring is one thing, easily removed, a tattoo. Oh good lord.

I felt faint.

I pulled my ring off, taking a deep breath in and placed it gently on the little soap holder before beginning to scrub my hair with the delicious smelling apple shampoo. The water began to wash away all my weariness and when I got out of the shower, I felt a lot cleaner in my head and on my body.

I wrapped a towel around me, then pulled my wet hair into a bun after ringing it a few times. I yawned, a dull headache ringing in my head as I walked out into the main room, stilling when I noticed Natsu's bare chest. My eyes bulged at the tattoo just above his nipple, Lucy.

"U-Uh..." My noise made him turn to me and he grinned, "Feeling any better?"

My eyes stayed glued to his chest and I lifted a shaking hand, "You have a tattoo." He looked down and simply smiled, his eyes reaching mine completely at ease, "Yeah I noticed it."

He noticed it?

His chuckle ripped me from my internal freak out as he shrugged, "It's not a big deal to me."

"Why isn't it?" I asked softly as he hesitated before smiling, "It just isn't. Did drunk Lucy help you figure a few things out?"

I pursed my lips, "We need food, and to look at the marriage certifcate. Apparently, I made a clause or something that stops us from divorcing? I dunno, I didn't make any sense."

"When do you make sense?" He laughed, pulling on his vest as I walked over to my suitcase, not really bothered that I was naked apart from a towel. I grabbed some underwear and some clothes before straightening when I heard his choked gasp.

I turned around as he pointed at me, "Is that my name on your ass?"

I flushed bright red, and winced, "Yeah, apparently I got a tattoo as well."

"Let me see it." he walked clsoser and I blanched, "No way! It's on my ass, and I'm naked."

"Aw come on, I want to see!" He still approached and I stumbled back, "Natsu, no!" His grin twitched at his mouth and I pushed my lips together to stop the giggle - I had no idea why his grin made me want to giggle - and settled for waving my finger in his face.

"It would be different if it was on another place - but you've become a pain in my ass literally."

He grinned proudly, as I slapped his forehead, "Don't look so proud!"

He cringed back in pain, "Hey! I let you see mine!"

"That's different, yours is literally on your chest. And you were topless when I came into the room."

"Details. Come on Lucy!" I cringed at his voice screaming my name and promptly slammed my hand over his mouth, summoning my 'Erza' stare, "Natsu, no."

We glared at each other heatedly before he grumbled, "Fine. Get dressed. I'm starving."

New story idea I've been playing around with ~ don't ask me why, I just feel like the Nalu community is missing out on the chance of an accidental marriage!

If you want me to continue this mess, give me a review on what you think (:

freshprincess xo