He probably shouldn't be here.

He really shouldn't be doing...this.

And he definitely shouldn't be doing this, here.

Backtrack for just a moment. 'Here' would be the rooftop balcony of Marinette Dupain-Cheng's bedroom. And 'this'...was embarrassing. He was laying with his back against the cool stone and his head was placed over the trap door that lead into Marinette's room just listening. Well, not just listening. It was entirely possible Chat was rubbing his gloved hand over the skin tight suit constraining a raging erection, grinding into it to get some kind of release. Which brings about the question of what the hell is he listening to?

Thanks to to the heightened sense his suit gave him when he landed on the rooftop a few moments prior about to swing open the trapdoor and make his way down his hand stopped. A sound echoed through those damned cat ears that made his breath catch in his throat; she moaned. At first he thought maybe he was just hearing things but when she did it again, louder, he knew that he really shouldn't open that door.

So what did this smart cat think to do? Lay down with his ears next to the trapdoor and just listen to her as she pleasured herself. Because clearly that was the best choice of action to go with here; listen in like a pervert. And he didn't have to wonder for too long who she was thinking about during this...activity because their name left her lips. "A-Adrien…" Okay, his name. Wait, his name? Yes, his name. He had no idea that she even liked him, and definitely did not consider that she thought of him that way.

From that point he couldn't pull himself away from the door and just kept listening as his suit got tighter and tighter. Quietly he had turned himself around so he could lay down and still listen as all the blood drained from his head and moved elsewhere. Then his hand followed the blood and now he was on her roof, in the middle of night, listening to her as she played with herself, and masturbating right alongside her.

He could hear every moan she made and could only imagine what she looked like as she lay below him. He pictured her sprawled out on her sheets with her hair loose, fanning out around her in a raven halo. Her back would be arched slightly off her bed with one hand cupping one of those perfect breasts. Maybe she'd even be teasing herself, gently pinching a nipple with her fingers. His hips bucked into his hand at the thought and he bit his index finger to stop himself from making a sound.

Chat listened as her moans grew louder, more desperate, and closer together in frequency. She must be close and that thought brought him even closer with her. He'd bet her cheeks were flushed, probably her whole body as well, with a light sheen of sweat making her glisten in her dark bedroom. And her eyes, oh he could lose himself just in his imagination of her eyes. Probably hazed over or glassy and half covered by those beautiful lashes. Then there's those wonderful lips that he imagined were soft and tasted like sweets being parted as she sighed in pleasure.

She was even louder now, he could even hear her breathing start to pick up rapidly. His own followed suit as he kept grinding into his own hand. God he wanted to take this suit off but Plagg would kill the mood instantly and give him away. Chat wanted neither of those things so he created as much friction as possible with his hand, suit, and hips while he quietly begged for release.

Marinette cried out beneath him. "Adrien…!" He heard her shout between loud moans and ragged breaths. She probably looked beautiful right now, riding out her own orgasm with her head tossed back in the sheets; abusing her lips with her teeth as she failed at holding back her cries of ecstasy. With one more forceful push into his hand his body started to shake with his climax. Plagg would probably kill him for coating the inside of his suit the way that he was but he didn't care because it felt way too good right now to worry about it.

"Mari…" he groaned lowly as his body was racked with pleasure and his mind was hazed over with endorphins. It was very short lived experience, however, because he suddenly heard something start pressing against the trapdoor. He realized very quickly that he said her name way too loudly and she must have heard him.

Abort, abort, abort. He scrambled up from where he was lying and quickly ducked behind her chimney before she had a chance to spot him. Okay, this was embarrassing and awkward. His back was now pressed against the brick chimney and honestly he was hoping that it ate him. His suit was starting to stick to him and he could feel everything drying on his abdomen oh god why did he do this? Why didn't he just go home? At least there he could have done this in the shower or just on his bed and not have to be freaking out because-

"Hello?" Her voice called out to him in the darkness and everything stopped; his breath, his heart, his brain, everything. 'Don't say anything, she can't actually see you, she doesn't know you're there' he repeated in his head. "Is there someone there?" She asked and he could hear her footsteps over the stone. Despite everything in his head telling him this was a bad idea he very slowly peeked out from the chimney. Not a lot, he made sure to still stay very well hidden but he wanted to see her.

And yes, this was a very bad idea.

And she was a devil.

The girl didn't even properly clothe herself, wrapped up in her blanket while walking around on her balcony. What was she thinking? 'Oh, I heard someone say my name, let me go investigate while not wearing any clothes what the fuck?' What if someone saw her? Sure it's the middle of the night but that didn't stop creeps from-

Creeps like him. Fuck.

He watched as a breeze caught her blanket, pushing where the two edges of the fabric met and flashing him just a small sliver of her form underneath. Nope, time to leave. He hid back behind the chimney and quickly reached for his baton but in his rush he ended up dropping it. There was a frantic moment of him trying, and failing, to catch it before it landed on the ground with a resounding clang. Then, to his horror, it started rolling away from him and towards her. It was like she was a magnet just drawing it, and naturally him, out of hiding because even though he wasn't looking at her it was obvious she was drilling holes through the brick into his back with her eyes.

This is not good. You know what, he doesn't need his baton, he can get home perfectly fine without it and he'll fight Akuma's without it it's fine, he doesn't need it. "Chat?!" Busted. Alright, he's just going to play this cool. He just got here, totally not half an hour ago. And he definitely did not rub one out on top of her roof while listening to her do the same thing. Nope, never happened.

Plastering on the best smile he could he jumped out from behind the chimney and bowed low before her. "Good evening, purr-incess. I hope you're enjoy-HRK!" He was thrown back with his baton hitting him square in the face. He fell backwards and landed flat on his ass rubbing his mouth where he was hit. Luckily nothing was damaged but it still hurt. "What was that for?" He asked, looking up at her to see her completely red in the face.

"How long were you up here?! And why are you even here?!" She asked, holding her blanket tighter against her form because suddenly she was very self conscious.

And suddenly he was way too calm about this.

He collected his baton and returned it to it's home on his belt while he made his way back onto his feet in one fluid motion. Chat flashed her a devious grin as he started to advance towards her; not knowing where the hell this was coming from but also not complaining. Marinette gave an audible squeak at his sudden advance and started taking a step backwards for every step he took forwards.

"I was up here long enough. Who's this lucky Adrien boy who occupies your thoughts instead of me?" Chat asked, pausing in his tracks so there was still a good foot between them but her butt was up against the rail of her balcony. "Someone who's way sweeter and much less perverted than a certain alley cat I know." She shot back at him as she held her blanket even tighter to herself. 'If only you knew…' He thought to himself as his smirk grew wider.

"You think so? From what I know of the guy he's pretty dirty in private." He tossed out nonchalantly; crossing one arm across his chest to take hold of the other as he looked down at his claws. While idly flicking his thumb against his fingers he peeked back up at her to see her face invent a new shade of red. "A-and how would..would you know anyt-thing about him?" She stammered out with wide eyes.

The blond returned his full attention to her but maintained his pose. "Oh, I know a lot about Adrien Agreste. Like what...and who he might be into." He purred lowly. He really needed to shut up and just leave but this was too much fun. He's never seen this many shades of red occupy her cheeks at one time. "Would you like to know? I could tell you. It'll come at a price, though."

He watched as she actually considered it, though he was too focused on watching the subtle changes in her expressions to notice her reaching behind her for something. The distraction cost him dearly as he was suddenly being drowned in a spritz attack from her spray bottle full of water. "As if I'd trust anything out of your mouth!" She shouted, laughing evilly as he attempted to shield his face from the offending water.

Using the distraction to her advantage she ducked past Chat and dove back into her bedroom, shutting the trapdoor quickly behind it. He was just about to go after her when he heard the door lock shut. Yeah, definitely time to go home. But not after one last little tease. He pressed himself to the ground once more so he could call out to her through the door.

"He's got a thing for pig tails and adorable freckles."
"Go to hell, Chat!"
"Good night, Princess!"

Chat pushed himself back up with a laugh and quickly retrieved his baton so he could vault off the roof and make his way home. He needed a shower; a cold one so he didn't think about doing anything else.


A/N: Right, so while I was writing this I originally meant to make it a dirty one-shot but as I kept going the idea of making this a humorous mini-series reveal type of fic came to mind and now I can't stop. SO! Look out for some updates. R&R please and thank you, XOXO!