A/N: Hey guys! I decided to finally write down this idea I've had in my head for a few months, and I hope you enjoy it! This is going to be Part 1 of possibly a three part story. I was inspired by the song The Killing Moon by Echo & the Bunnymen, and hope you'll listen to it after you finish reading this. See you at the bottom!
Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight.
Note: Unbeta'd so all mistakes are my own.
Part 1: Under Blue Moon
They'd always told me that we were destined to be together, though I'd never really taken it as seriously as I should have. The mystical energy that connected us was just too powerful to keep him from me, and the bond only seemed to be getting stronger with each day that passed.
I'd never really given much thought to the word imprint, though I'd heard it several times growing up when I would spend time in La Push, with Charlie's friends and their families. But I should have connected the dots between this word and fate. To be completely honest, it all made sense in a way, even if I didn't want it to.
Jacob had started following me a few months earlier, and at first, I thought nothing of his constant appearance. Even if his reason for being where I was didn't make sense, I had brushed off the way his eyes seemed to linger on my neck and legs, and the way he talked sometimes.
If I so even as mentioned another boys name, his back would tense up, and his hands would start to shake. I didn't understand his aggression, couldn't pinpoint where it all stemmed from until I let it drop to Charlie one afternoon that I was afraid of his best friend's son.
"Now, Bella, there's nothing to be afraid of from Jacob. Don't you see that he's head over heels for you?" His lip curled up, and I could see he was amused at my lack of observational skills. I blushed without meaning to, cursing that I was so easily embarrassed.
"But I don't...I don't think of him in that way." I struggled to get my point across as Charlie's eyes assessed me in a dismissive manner.
"I'm sure that'll change."
It didn't, though Charlie took every chance he got to stick the two of us together. Reluctantly I would sit on the couch, my thigh touching Jacob's, my arms crossed while the three of the them watched the days game. I would try to ignore just how close we were, but I was always hyper aware of just how high his body temperature was.
I'd try my hardest to make up excuses to retreat to the kitchen, if only for a few moments, but even then he'd follow, his body acting as my own personal shadow.
"Do you need help with anything?" His voice was always rough and strangely soft at the same time. I never did understand how such a contradiction could exist.
He leaned against the counter where I was shuffling to finish up dinner, chopping cherry tomatoes at a snail's pace, trying to waste as much time as possible before we would be forced to all sit at the same table.
I shook my head no, daring to spare a shy glimpse at his face. I couldn't look into his eyes for too long without feeling like I was drowning in his heated gaze. His tongue darted out to moisten his bottom lip, and my breath caught in my throat. I couldn't understand what it was about him, but I sensed something dark and strange about him. He had an otherness that was just too hard to not see.
"Bella, I've been meaning to ask you something." He came closer then, a step too close. His hand pressed at my lower back, the heat of his palm burning as if no material separated my skin from his. I stopped chopping, the knife going still in my grasp.
"What is it?" My voice came out smaller than I intended it to, and I had the fleeting thought that I sounded like a little girl.
Red creeped around his neck, and he scratched at his scalp nervously. He cleared his throat then, determined to get over his momentary shyness. "I wanted to ask you to a bonfire Sam and Emily are having this weekend."
I'd known about the bonfire having talked to Emily earlier in the week, but I hadn't ever imagined it more than as being a friendly get together. I was excited to see Leah, Quil and Embry. It had been too long since we'd hung out, and ever since school had started, I hadn't had a lot of time to socialize, much less sleep.
"Like a date?" It seemed as if time had stopped or at least slowed. My heart beat fast in my chest, and my hands turned clammy. The knife slipped from my hand and onto the floor. We both shuffled to grab it, and only when we came up to stand again did he answer, "Yeah. I could pick you up in the Rabbit an hour before."
My voice got caught in my throat, and the silence between us quickly became horribly thick. "I don't think -" His face started to fall before I'd even gotten the chance to finish, knowing that rejection was coming. I couldn't do that to him. I could already see the hurt building in his eyes, already digging like he had thorns in his sides. "I mean, I'd have to ask Charlie first."
His entire demeanor changed; he grinned, smug. His reply was a quick, "He'd be okay with it. It's not like I'm some stranger or anything." But he was. In the past year so many things had changed about him. No longer did he wear his hair long, the way I preferred it, No longer did he make me feel easy going, instead leaving me anxiety ridden, and constantly questioning whether or not he was the same boy I'd grown up with in the woods.
And it was like he didn't know how to keep his hands to himself anymore. I couldn't remember if he ever this grabby, and if so, if the nature of his touches had changed from innocent into something else.
Just like he'd predicted, Charlie had practically jumped for joy when Jacob had asked for his permission to take me out Saturday night. I still hadn't even said the word yes, and the decision was already made for me.
I picked at my food, tuning out the rest of their conversation. I pierced a tomato half with the tines of my fork, ready to put it in my mouth when I felt Jacob's searing hand move to rest on my thigh underneath our shabby dinning room table. I jumped, not at all expecting his touch.
Charlie and Billy were way too animated in their discussion of the outcome of the game to notice, and I shot Jacob an accusatory glare. This made him squeeze my flesh all the more fiercely, harder.
I tried to push his hand away, but he wouldn't let up. Frustrated tears welled up in my eyes, and it seemed as if Saturday had been ruined before it ever came.
I tried my best to avoid him throughout the entire week; it wasn't easy. I felt like he was always one step behind me, too close to touch. I'd seen him in the hallways of school, though I knew he didn't go to Forks High, and on the highway, the Rabbit a constant companion in my side view mirror.
I didn't know if I was imagining him following me, or if it was really happening. I didn't mention anything to Charlie again. I was afraid he would think I was over reacting, or worse, try to stick us together in attempt to show me that Jacob was a nice guy.
I dreaded Saturday like I'd dreaded moving to Forks permanently last fall. I'd spent so much time in Forks already, it seemed almost a relief to quit traveling back and forth from Jacksonville. But I was quickly coming to regret my logical decision.
Emily called the night before the bonfire, looking to rouse me out of the house. "I haven't heard from you all week. Are you okay, Bella?"
"Yeah, I'm fine. I've just been tired." My voice sounded unconvincing even to my ears, but I couldn't think of anything else to say without revealing too much about how I felt. I didn't want to ruin the party she'd been planning for a couple of weeks now.
"Are you sure? You just kind of seem unhappy lately."
"I'm not not happy, it's just that.." I paused, unsure of revealing to her just how anxious I'd been.
"What Bella? You know you can tell me anything." Her voice sounded reassuring, and slightly concerned, but there was also an undertone of anticipation that just didn't sit right with me. But I pressed on anyway, telling her about the date. "Oh, wow. Finally! I've been waiting for him to finally work a nerve enough to ask you."
"You knew he was going to ask me out?!"
"No, but he's been wanting to forever. Trust me when I say he likes you way more than you know."
"I don't know if that's a good thing."
"Why? Don't you like him? He's been your best friend all your life."
"He's...changed. It's like I don't know who he is anymore. He gives me this weird feeling. I just can't describe it, but I feel like he's just always there."
"He likes you Bella. Give him a chance, and if it works, it works."
Our conversation dissolved after that into a detailed description of how Sam had taken her in the woods the afternoon before, and I listened, irrationally jealous of how he loved her. How he seemed to worship the very air she breathed. It was a different kind of worship, one that didn't stem from obsession or feeling the need to own something just because it was beautiful. His love was pure, one that did not expect anything in return but to be allowed to continue to exist.
That night I fell asleep, ambivalent for reasons I didn't understand. I woke the next morning and stared at the ceiling, at the ridges in the plaster that hadn't been there a few hours ago. Where had those come from? It looked as if something had dug deep with it's claws into the white, just enough to shift the ceiling downward, but not hard enough to break through. If I didn't know any better, the impression looked like one of a paw, but I really couldn't imagine anything lithe or capable enough to have jumped on the roof without waking me. This one's going to be hard to explain to Charlie.
I sighed, knowing the day was only going to get worse.
"Bella! Jake's here." Too nervous to even breathe, I smoothed down the the baby blue dress I'd chosen to wear, praying it was casual enough for the bonfire, but also nice enough that it'd looked like I tried to put effort into my look. The straps were thin on my shoulders, making my skin look softer, almost supple. I turned in front of the mirror propped against a corner of my room, inspecting how my waist looked from the side. I was glad the cut was flattering; the length mid-thigh without looking too short, and the material as flyaway as a sundress. I hoped Charlie wouldn't disapprove. Breathing in a deep breath, I knew I couldn't keep them waiting any longer than I already had.
As soon as my flats touched the steps, his dark head snapped up to look at me from below. I attempted a smile, and tried not to slip by holding onto the banister of the staircase. I felt dizzy, almost like I hadn't eaten all day. That same nauseating feeling only intensified as I descended down the steps until I was standing right in front of him.
I expected him to say what they did in the movies when the boy picked up a girl for their first date; that I was beautiful though I didn't believe so myself, that I looked nice, that it was great to see me. Anything. Instead I was met with silence.
My uneasiness grew. The few moments spent standing in front of him, looking into his dark eyes, I realized I'd never experienced such intimacy without touch. He let me know just with the inky depths of his eyes that he could shatter me inside without so much as lifting a finger. You were destined for me, his gaze said.
Don't. Don't do this, my eyes pleaded, but before I could convince him to give me a chance to escape before he ensnared me in his grasp, he turned away.
"I'll have her home by her curfew, Charlie."
"I trust you, Jacob. Keep my girl safe."
"I will, Chief." Charlie clapped him on the back, smiling before he turned to me and moused my hair up.
"Have a good time, kids." With that he headed towards the living room, the sounds of the game just starting taking away any interest he had just had.
"Come." Jacob took my hand in his, and I stared, slightly fascinated by the contrast his russet skin made against the pale pallor I'd been cursed with. His touch was warm, and I became all the more anxious that he would feel just how clammy I'd become in his domineering presence. I found myself unable to form words, to speak, except to say thank you when he opened the door of the Rabbit for me.
The first thing I'd noticed when I became settled was the smell. Breathing in, the air felt almost metallic passing through my lungs, like I'd bent and pressed my nose against rusted metal. The scent reminded me of something I just couldn't put my finger on.
I sat, my hands reaching for the seat belt when the memory came to me, distilled and as sharp as the prick my lab partner in Biology had used that day to jab into the center of my finger with.
"The blood," I'd told Edward as a way of warning, staring at the rush of red that had formed into a droplet on my skin, but it had already been too late. I'd passed out in his arms and woke an hour later in the nurses office, the scent still filling my nostrils though the wound had closed and formed a dry stain inside the pocket of my pants.
The nurses wrote me off as a queasy young woman, but Edward wouldn't let it go, lingering at the side of the small cot I had been resting on, a strange curiosity in his eyes.
"You can smell blood?" He asked.
"Yes, it smells like metal to me." I scrunched my nose up in distaste, and tried to breathe through my mouth instead.
Now, the scent of blood permeated throughout the entire cab of the car. I looked down at the leather, feeling any moment I would feel the wet seep into the bottom of my dress. But it never came, and the fabric remained dry.
Jacob slammed the door shut, the sound breaking me out of my intense sniffing.
"Did you hurt yourself recently?" I asked.
Turning the key into the ignition, he turned to me with a sly look in his eyes, one that made me regret asking the question immediately. He pursed his lips, and said nothing, only continuing to grin.
"Have you been hunting, Jake?" The edges of his teeth seemed sharper the next time he smiled, moonlight glinting off the enamel through the open window.
"You could say that." This time the dark undertones of his voice sent shivers running all down my spine, like a straight edged fingernail gently scratching against the ridges of my vertebrae. I saw gore in his eyes, my remains manifested in a twisted hemlock of dreams. My breath caught, and he chuckled, finding humor in my fear.
The night was still. I could see flames from were I stood, but there was an eerie silence to the night I hadn't expected. I'd thought we'd walk into the bonfire in full swing, hear the obnoxious laughter of all those that stirred trouble in La Push, but the surrounding logs were surprisingly empty.
"Where is everyone?" It felt like I'd been asking questions all night, my confusion doing little to help me feel comfortable with this forced date.
I expected a coy answer, that this had been a ploy orchestrated for the sole purpose of getting me to say yes. But as I looked up at his face lit by the spitting fire, I could see that he too, was surprised. His expression hardened the longer I stared at him, and I could see the tightening in his eyes before he turned his face away, knowing I was searching for answers, for the truth in the lines of his face.
"I'm not sure." Suddenly I was glad he'd taken my hand as soon as we got out the car, the weight of his hot palm steady against mine. Unknowingly curling up to his side, I'd thought I saw him begin to smirk when his upturned lip relaxed.
"What should we do? Maybe I'd better head back-" My voice stopped dead in my throat at the lethal look in his eyes. Feeling his unspoken threat in the silence, I closed my mouth, and tried to keep my bottom lip from trembling.
"You're not going anywhere. Chief doesn't expect you home until midnight. Until then, it seems I have you all to myself."
I couldn't control the tremble that went through my body at his words, or the slight twinge of wetness I started to feel soak through the thin material of my panties. Embarrassed and ashamed, I toed the sand with the end of my flats, trying to play off the flush I knew was beginning to creep up on the edges of my neck, and on the shallow parts of my chest.
But there was no hiding my reluctant arousal. I heard his sure chuckle, the sound letting me know just what I suspected.
"Don't fight. It'll only make everything that much harder."
We walked the sands of the beach until the sun fell completely away from the sky, leaving the entire landscape bathed in dusk. My skin curdled, and I shivered as the cold night's air whipped at my dress. Rubbing my hands down my arms, I followed Jacob as he continued on, as if seeking someplace hidden in the cliffs.
"Where are we going?" I asked, impatient with the journey. I wasn't sure how much more of this trekking through La Push I could stand. The further we descended away from the Rabbit, and the road, the more ominous the night seemed to become.
There were no others to be seen, no late night stragglers, or horny teenagers trying to find a place in the sand to fuck. My eyes sought any figures in the distance, unsure whether I was looking for someone to reassure me I wouldn't be completely alone with Jacob, or if I was scanning for any other predators that lurked in the shadows.
"Jake?" I could hear the frightened pitch in my voice, but couldn't find it in me to care enough to fight it. "Slow down." I reached to touch his arm, only to be swept up in his tight grasp.
"Quiet." He took hold of the side of my neck, and pressed down, pinching on the tender flesh as if to still any words that might come out. Pushing him away, I rubbed at the mark he'd begun to make.
"What's wrong with you? I want to go home, Jake. Now."
"After," he said simply, seemingly unfazed by the harshness in my tone. He grabbed my hand when I stopped walking, and dragged me by my fingers. If his grip hadn't been so impossible to break, I liked to think I would have fought. That I would have put a stop to everything, but I knew just as he knew that as long as he wanted me, that there was nothing I could do to stop him.
"You're hurting me. Let go, please."
"We're almost there. Hush."
I don't know when the tears started but once they did, I couldn't stop them falling, my eyes an endless stream of confusion and fear.
"Please tell me we're not going up there." My eyes trailed along the tops of the cliffs, and I now understood why we'd walked as far as we had. There was a path that lead to the highest cliff just ahead, and Jacob was steering us towards it.
I tried to dig my flats as far in the sand as possible, delaying the inevitable just a moment longer.
His eyes flashed in the darkness, warning me that he had only so much patience. "Surrender, or you won't like what I do next."
Swallowing, I took a deep breath, and followed him, knowing that my best chance at actually making it back home safely was to listen to everything he said, whether I wanted to or not.
Underneath our feet the gravel gave way, and before I knew it, we both stood atop the tallest cliff in all of La Push. I found myself burrowing my face into his chest, not daring to look over the edge or just how far up we were. I felt him stroking my hair down my back before he tilted my face up towards his.
"Look at the moon, how full it is," his voice turned thoughtful, softer now that I'd stopped fighting.
I gazed at the one-sided sphere in the sky that seemed to radiate a glow so brilliant, my eyes couldn't stand the sight. "It's beautiful," I said, turning away.
"Sometimes it hurts to look it's so beautiful." His eyes traveled down the length of my body longingly, making my insides quiver from both want and fear.
"Jake..." I didn't know if I was saying yes or no, or if I was just simply speaking his name to fill the heated silence that had come between us. Whatever the case, the moment he pressed his lips to mine, we were both lost.
He ravaged my mouth, taking hold of the back of my head to make sure I wouldn't pull away. I struggled weakly against him, my hands pushing against his chest no match for his untamed desires.
"No, Jake," I managed when he finally pulled away, breathing raggedly into my neck. His lips didn't stop, nor did his teeth as they both pulled at my neck, taking the skin and leaving it raw.
"I know you feel it too." His hand slid down, bunching my dress at the waist and cupped at the place between my thighs. "See how wet you are for me, your body knows what it wants. Before the next moon comes, you'll give it to me."
A/N: Well..would you give it to him? ;) Anyways, please leave me a review telling me how you felt about this part. I'm really happy with how it's come out so far, and hope to have the next part sometime soon.
Until then ~ a nyr byrjun