Captain America was sick of freedom and eagles and apple pies so he became a nazizizizizs to deal with his sudden mid-life crisis (life is tough when ur 70 something years old). Tony was like "don't u do it cap" but Cap was like "fuk yuo tony all u ever do all day is build shitty robots in ur shitty tower and ur job is shitty and also Peeper had syphilis so good luck broooo 👌👀👌👀👌👀👌👀👌👀" tony cried because of his newfound stds and shot himself not because of stds but because he couldn't believe captain America was joining hydra because cap would probably sooner shove a cactus up his ass than join a nazizizizi organization.
So captain America went to red skrull's house and joined his super secret nazizizizizi club blanket fort. There was also madamn hydra and some hydra underlings nobody cares about. Red skrull gave Steeb a bowl of nacho chips and talked about his super awesome mega plan that can't be fooled by anyone™.
"ok time for my super awesome mega plan that can't be fooled by anyone ™" red skrull said shoving a nacho in his nose hole "we kill the joos"
"but I am made by joos" Steeb protesteds because his creators are literally jewish. "What I do"
Red Skrull thought deeply before slapping Steeb across the face. "there I slapped the joo out of u and u are now not joo. Genetics." He explained. It made perfect sense.
"thank u rad skull I can now kill joos without guilt and further soil my creator's legacy and spit on their history" Steeb said sincenrely grabbing a sharpie and redecorating his shield with a swastika. It looked really fucking tacky but w/e it works I guess. "form this day farword I am now…CAPTAIN NAZIZIZI" he proclaimed, pulling out the American flag from his pocket before taking a huge shit on it. But he forgot to take off his pants first so he just ended up shitting his pants.
Meanwhile in avengers tower the avenger (minus tony because he sucided and also minus cap because he is now a nazizizizs) all decided they had to stop steeb and this madness. Bruce banner was mourning his science brow, nat and clint were fucking on the table, and nobody gives a fuck about thor.
Bruce banner was angry and punched nat in her vagina "stop having the sex because captain America is now a nazizizizizs and we have to fix it" nat had a look of shame on her face but clint didn't because he just gots laaaaaaaaaaid.
Also spooderman was there too but he wasn't sure if he was an avenger or not because no1 gave him his membership card.
"we have to do something" thor said being a useless piece of shit.
"Obvs." Nat said rolling her eyes and her hips and her butt. "we have to convince him this is the wrong ting to do. We need to collect memories of the Good Times™."
It was the perfect plan. They all collected memories of the Good Times™ and set out to find captain America or also captain nazizizizizis because he legally changed his name.