Disclaimer and Explanation: I was bored so i threw this Quickie together just to put up. Its not my funniest works, but as long as it brings a smile to someone's face, it was worth writing. Oh btw, I don't own Pokemon, nor do i own Ash, Misty, Brock, Pikachu, Jessie, James or Meowth. I do however own rip-offs of them. I hope one day Brash Katchoom will be as big as Ash. Look for him leaving Pillet Town any day now. (If you're one of the 2 people that took that seriously, and not as a joke... PLEASE do not reproduce.) Anyway, enjoy... next time a write another quickie, I'll just add it as another chapter to this one. Oh and as always I'd really appreciate reviews.

Pokemon Quickie: No vaya a Taco Bell

"How can a city this big NOT have a gym?" Ash asked slightly annoyed.

"Don't get mad at me Ash," Brock replied, holding up his booklet, "I didn't write this book. Look, it says that Culio de la Raton is a city without a pokemon center because a young boy named Yu-Gi-Oh came through years ago and made everyone forget about pokemon... at least until the fad wore off, but by that time, it was too late to get the gym running again."

Misty sighed, "Yes, thank you sooooo much for that editorial" She yanks the book away from Brock, "What it really says is that the pokemon center closed down 20 years ago when the owner went off her own journey."

Ash smiled, "Oh, well i hope she comes back soon, I'd love to battle some one with that much experience."

"You wont be battling her, unless they come out with a Ougei board version of Pokemon," Misty explained, "she's dead."

That thought brought Ash down a bit. "That's so sad... how'd she die?"

"Well, it says here she was eaten by a Magikarp." Misty said.

"Sounds a bit fishy to me." Brock replies.

Ash looked at Brock and replied, "Brock, did you have to cast out that fish pun?"

Brock grinned and said, "Get reel, of course I did."

"Well i guess i fell for it hook line and stinker." Ash replied.


That was the sound of Misty's mallet drilling Brock and Ash's skull. She walked away muttering, "I hate puns."

After Ash and Brock caught up to the fiery red head, Ash said, "You know, speaking of things being eaten, we should get a bite to eat as long as we're here."

Brock nodded over to a Taco Bell, "How about there, we haven't had mexican for a while."

Ash nodded, "I haven't had mexican since I last saw my old friend Rolando."


"Rolando, old buddy," Ash said getting ready to leave, "I just want to say, your a true friend. We've been best friends for so long, I cant imagine life without you. We've seen it all, but I'm afraid i have to go now. The world of Pokemon is calling me, and i must answer it. Carpe Diem, my dear friend, you have to seize the day and make it your own! I hope you never forget me, i promise you my dear sweet buddy, I'll never, ever forget you..." Ash smiled as his friend... ...who looked confused at him and said, "No hablo inglés" "


Ash sighed, "We were so close."

Brock and Misty shot a glance at each other, but before either could say a word, Ash said, "all right then, lets go get something to eat!" And dashed off to Taco Bell.

*INSIDE TACO BELL* (By the way, just so you know, what is to follow is based on actual events that happened to me not that long ago, enjoy)

After a short wait, it was Ash and company's time to order. The young woman behind the counter asked Ash for his order. "all right," Ash said, "I'll take the 10 taco family meal, please make that 5 soft shell tacos, and 5 hard shell tacos. And would you please add the mexican pizza to that meal?"

The woman punched it up, and said, "Alright, that'll be $30.85"

Ash's face fell. He glances up at the price board. It clearly says, "10 Taco Family Meal... $9.95, add a mexican pizza for $2.95" He then looks back down and at the price register. "$30.85"

Ash scratches his head. "Umm... miss, i think you've made a mistake..."

The woman shakes her head no. "Your order right here, 10 Taco Family Meal, plus a 5 soft shell tacos, plus 5 hard shell tacos, plus a mexican pizza meal."

The trio exchange glances. "Umm... I'm sorry ma'am, but you've misunderstood my order. I don't want all that extra stuff, i just want the taco meal with the pizza."

The woman lets out an annoyed sigh, "I have to get the manager now."

And a minute later, the manager came out, "Is there a problem?" She asked stiffly.

Ash made a rye face, and said, "Not a problem ma'am, there was just a mistake in the order..."

"He wants to change his order AFTER i rang it up," The teller explains.

The manager lets out and annoyed sigh, and takes out her key. "Fine..." She presses a few buttons, and the order is deleted, "Just give her the order again." And she leaves.

Ash takes a deep breath and repeats his order... very slowly. "Alright." The teller says a bit annoyed, "I got it NOW... your order is $24.30"

Ash winced at the price, and caught his temper. Sadly, Misty did not, "WHAT? What did you ring up this time?"

The teller raised an eyebrow and said, "I rang up exactly what you said, a 10 taco meal, and a mexican pizza meal, and a steak burrito meal."

Ash couldn't contain himself this time. "WHAT? What burrito meal? I never even said anything CLOSE to burrito!"

"Fine!" The teller said, "I'll change your burrito meal to just a burrito?"

"NO!" Ash yelled, "NO BURRTIO!"

The teller looked at him like he had three heads. "You don't want the burrito?"

Ash bit his tongue, took a breath and said, "No... i don't want the burrito... I also don't want the Mexican Pizza meal."

"You ASKED for a mexican pizza, sir" The teller said annoyed

"YES!" Ash said

"Now you don't want it?"

Ash growled slightly, "I WANT the Pizza... I DONT want the meal..."

Teller: "Alright then... i got you now... that's $4.95."

Ash winced again, his face turning a slight tinge. Brock leaned over to Pikachu who happened to be waiting on his shoulder, "We should have went to Burger King..."

Pikachu replied, "Pikachu chu pika chu pikapichu" (Personally i don't like any place without those little ketchup packets)

Meanwhile, Misty stepped in again, "HOW did you come up with $4.95???"

"A Mexican Pizza meal with a burrito, NOT a burrito meal." The teller explained.

Ash grabbed his head and let out a yell, "We're BACK to the damned Burrito!!! And I don't want a Mexican Pizza meal..." Ash pointed up to the large sign overhead, "You see that picture up there? The 10 taco meal, plus a Mexican Pizza, THATS what i want!"

The Teller leaned over the counter and looked up. "Sorry sir, i cant see from this angle... But i think i got you this time. The total is $13.95."

Ash face brighten up, that total sounded close. "Alright then!" And handed her a twenty dollar bill and got his recipe. Ash's face fell when he saw the recipe.

_____________ Taco Bell

5 soft tacos

1 Mexican Pizza

1 Mexican Pizza Meal


Ash slammed his fists down on and yelled, "NO! What in the depths of your ignorance is the problem here??? I just wanted the damned meal on the sign here!"

The manager happened to come back now. "Sir... is there a problem?"

"YES!!!" Ash and Misty yelled together

Ash almost pleading now, said, "All i wanted when i came in here, was a 10 taco meal, 5 soft, 5 hard, and the Mexican Pizza that comes with the meal for about 3 bucks extra. What is so hard about this? What is the trouble?"

(Just so you know... this is where my real life story ends... but actually this story is almost over too, just hang in there!)

"Trouble?" The girl said, "Well... perhaps you should PREPARE for trouble!"

The manager, who we now find out is a male, "And you should make it double!"

The trio groaned, "NOW i KNOW we should have went to Burger King..." Brock says.

A customer came up to the counter, "Excuse me... there's fur in this taco."

"HEY!" Meowth yelled at the guy, while hopping up on the counter. "I got dees here plastic gloves on and this hair net on! Don't blame for da hair!' Then Meowth coughed, gagged and spit up a wad of hair onto the floor.

(Alright, everyone all together now. "EWWWWWWWWWWW!!!!")

That's pretty much what everyone did at this sight, especially those that realized they had soggy hair in their food too, and the building emptied pretty quickly.

"Alright twerp!" Jessie yelled, "Hand over Pikachu or its time to battle!"

"NEVER!" Ash said reaching for his balls. (Filthy filthy minds)

Jessie called out, "Go... ARBOK!" But before she could call out her pokemon, she was handcuffed. So were James and Meowth. "Wha...?" James asked.

A man held out his badge, "Health Inspector. You three are under arrest. This place is filthy!"

As they were being led out, "But.. but... we don't even OWN this place!"

Ash and company laughed at their foe's misfortune, till Ash asked, "Hey... where's Pikachu?" Then the young boy found his pokemon rummaging through the hot sauce packets. "Hey no!!! Pikachu, that's not..."

"PIKAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!" The yellow mouse yelled leaping through the air, spewing flames.

"...ketchup... it's hot sauce..." Ash finished too late.

Pikachu: "Pika chu chu pikachu chupi pipichu." (This ending really burns me up)

Brock grinned at the screen and said, "That's salsa folks!... haha.. get it? That's salsa... get it? AUGH!" Brock took off as he saw Misty closing in with her mallet with that 'i hate puns' look on her face. Iris out on the mallet.


"Whew..." Misty said, putting down her mallet. "This one's in the bag."

"Thank god," Ash said, "What a load of crap this episode was."

Brock sighs, "That's SALSA folks??? What the hell is up with that? If that wasn't the most corny piece of crap I've ever uttered..."

Ash shrugs, "At least its over, lets go get a bite to eat."

Misty giggled, "Sure, anything BUT Taco Bell... Hey... what's up with Pikachu?"

Annoyed, the yellow mouse yells, "PIKACHU PIKAPI CHU PIKAPI!! PIKA CHU CHU PIPIPICHU!" (You could have told me that was REAL DAMN hot sauce in that packet!!! I burnt my freaking tongue!)

The trio walks off the set, "Come on, we'll get you a glass of water Pikachu" Ash says, "And I know you two are disappointed with this episode, but come on... its still better then Mucha Lucha..."


This story is dedicated to the hard workers at Taco Bell... who have never ONCE gotten my order completely right.

This story is brought to you by a grant from the C.H.U.D.s foundation, and by reviewers like you... so please submit a review! Much thanks!