He stared through the small window of the airplane as the plane started its descent. As usual, he was flying alone as his manager had already returned a few days earlier.
Back to Japan.
Three years ago, the opportunity to play a role in a Hollywood blockbuster came and he couldn't refuse it. It was a step he had been waiting for, for far too long. That one role opened up the doors to a career in the States that he hadn't even dared to dream off and it sky-rocketed.
His immediate international success was something neither he, his manager nor the president had imagined.
But leaving Japan had been heart-breaking. The time away from Japan even more so.
It had been three years since he had last spoken to her.
He hadn't planned to break off all contact, but in a way it had happened. Yashiro didn't really stop buggering him about her roles, the attention she got, the fame she gained, her ever-growing popularity. After all, Kyoko was now one of Japans first-rate actresses. She was in the very same position he had been in before he left.
He had never foreseen that it would take three whole years to return to Japan. He had believed it to be a few months tops and with the way he left things it would be better to keep of contact for a while. But three years was a terribly long time, things can change badly in such a long time.
After they had landed he took off for the nearest bathroom and set his wig and coloured lenses in place. Travelling as Tsuruga Ren had always been impossible but after returning after three years he couldn't walk out the airport as himself, he had to be Tsuruga Ren. The responsibilities to the press were larger than ever and Yashiro forced him to at least appear happy to return.
After all, he was terrified to be back.
In his pocket, he felt his phone rang, as expected it was Yashiro.
"Ren, it is time for you to come out now. I don't think the media can be controlled any longer." Yashiro said.
"Okay. I'll be out." Ren replied.
Leaving the bathroom, his façade of Tsuruga Ren fell back in place. It was a role he was too accustomed to, a role he was scared to leave. But he knew that he would have to in the near future.
When he entered the main hall, he was greeted by millions of light flashes, all trying to take his picture. He put his smile in place and greeted them as he was supposed to.
The red numbers showed that it was already far past eleven as a young woman walked into her apartment and flickered on the lights. Her feet were tired from walking all day.
It had been terribly busy as she had run from one set to another. She had a regular spot in one of the most popular dramas of the moment and was the main female character in an upcoming movie. Not to mention all the photo shoots.
She had reached her dream not too long ago. It had been only a year since she had won the awards for best actress in a motion picture and had been named the most desirable bachelorette of Japan.
A yawn escaped her as she found something more comfortable to wear and pulled her chestnut hair up in a bun. She moved to the bathroom to remove her remaining make-up.
The surrounding still felt pretty unusual to her, even though she had moved to the apartment a little over a year ago.
Her new-found fame forced Kyoko to move out of Darumaya and into an apartment in one of the most luxurious condos of Tokyo. Although she initially had wanted to buy somewhere less fancy, the president had insisted she moved here because of security reasons. After all, there had been some incidents with hard-core reporters who had been lurking around Darumaya just to catch a photo of her.
Her phone rang. It was a message from her manager. Tomorrow he would pick her up at 9 am. Apparently the audition for a new historical drama had been scheduled early.
Kyoko moved into the living room with a glass of water and allowed herself half an hour of television before she would retire for bed.
She zapped through the channels as there was not much interesting on. That is until she saw a familiar face and her body froze.
'After three years in the States, actor Tsuruga Ren has finally returned to Japan. Earlier today he landed and he was welcomed by hordes of reporters and fans on the airport."
Kyoko's eyes were fixated on the appearance of her former sempai on the television. He looked well, maybe slightly tired but overall well.
During these past three years of radio silence, she had wondered if he was eating well if he slept enough.
"After his success as Katsuki in 'Dark Moon,' Tsuruga-san got numerous offers from the American movie industry. A risky step which he decided to make. Although he has been in another country for years, he has never really vanished from our minds or our hearts and we are happy to see him back on Japanese ground." The reporter continued.
Her hands were slightly shaking. Had he really returned? She didn't dare to believe it. It was unlike him to arrive announced but Kyoko knew that something changed when he left. His persona became even more strict and allowed even less room for mistakes and she had done the same. Her entire focus had been on her career, telling herself not to linger on Tsuruga-san. She wondered if things had been different if she had tried to reach out to him. But all was in vain, she didn't know what to say and she didn't want to stand in the way of his international success. A great actor as Tsuruga Ren should not be held back by a minor kohai.
The television forgotten, Kyoko stood up and before she even was aware of herself, she had already thrown on her coat and her shoes and was hurrying to the elevator.
Forgetting about her status as an actress, she ran outside out in the open without her usual shades or hat. She blessed her luck when there was a cab standing outside.
She got in and told the driver her place of destination. It took them twenty minutes to get there. Muttering small thanks and handing him the money for the drive, Kyoko made her way over to the condo and felt small as it towered over her.
Gathering her courage together she walked inside, towards the elevator to go to the floor, where he had lived.
Kyoko hadn't gone there since he left. Right now, the key to his apartment felt heavy around her neck. He had left her the key in a letter, telling her confusing confessions, but assuring her that no matter what he would always be there for her. She had only used the key once, on the evening, she had received his letter. Unfortunately, by that time he had already left for the United States.
Slowly, questioning her actions she walked over the door and stared at it for a small minute. Would he really return to this place? Maybe he had decided to take a hotel room for the night. The place could even be sold somewhere in the last three years.
Pressing her lips together she forced herself to press the bell. She heard it ring inside. Her face was void of any emotion. Not sure what to expect. Not sure what she was exactly doing there.
Suddenly she became awfully self-aware. She was standing in front of Tsuruga Ren's door, who she hadn't seen or heard of for three years in the middle of the night. Her hair was pulled up and she was wearing a simple shirt and jeans. Her make-up had already been removed, making her awfully plain in her appearance.
What would she say if that door opened?
She considered running away at that very moment.
But before she could put that plan into action. The door opened and showed the man she had missed during these past three years.
Tsuruga Ren was glad that he was able to quickly return home. No interviews, no press conferences today. But his schedule could only be fully planned for the next few days. Yashiro had already mentioned that every talk-show had tried to book when his return was announced. But in the morning, the first thing he would do was to meet with the president and he wasn't really looking forward to it.
Right now he was watching Kyoko's newest drama on the television. She played the younger sister of the main character who was involved with the wrong people. Her performance was splendid. Her character's breakdown was slow but painful. It reminded him of his past.
He was still unable to confront it. Even though he had been in the same country as his parents for the last three years he found himself unable to contact them as his true self.
Another sip of scotch.
The liquid burned in his throat, but he needed it. Watching the girl he loved perform flawless made him ache for her. It made him realise how desperately he needed her in his life and to share his life with her.
But he feared the damage he had done to her. The damage the letter had done to her.
He hadn't meant to write it down, but once he started he found himself unable to stop. Since Kyoko was visiting the Fuwa's in Kyoto that day he couldn't see her before he left.
He had even given her his spare key.
It was supposed to be three months, but three months turned into a year and that year turned into three.
There was no contact from her neither. He had scared her, driven her away. He had asked something of her that she wasn't able to do. And now three years later he feared that the next time they would meet it would be strictly professional.
The doorbell rang and called his mind back to the present. His eyes drifted to the clock. Ten minutes to twelve, who would drop by at this time? Sure people knew he had returned to Japan but not everyone knew his address.
Slightly annoyed he walked to the door and prepared to send his unwanted visitor away.
When he caught sight of his guest he froze in his tracks.
He stared her. He had known that she matured beautifully but the twenty-year-old was far more mesmerising in real life than on television. Her chestnut hair was longer than he remembered even pulled up in a bun he could tell that it reached far past her shoulders. Her features were not tainted by any make-up and her cheeks looked slightly flustered. Even in simple jeans and shirt she still made his heart race.
Mogami Kyoko was the only woman to ever hold his heart.
But she couldn't be here, could she?
"Ren."
Nor would she ever call him by his first name.
The scotch was playing tricks on him. But he didn't mind, not today, not in fear of tomorrow. Slowly he reached out his hand and caressed her cheeks. He noticed her flinch at his touch but didn't move away.
Tears welled up in her eyes and Ren began to panic slightly.
"No, don't cry. Please don't cry." He whispered.
"I'm just so happy that you are truly back." She muttered and flew in his chest, her arms tightened around his body. Instantly he wrapped his arms around her, pulling her closer.
Her sweet scent and warmth surrounded him. It felt real, almost too real.
"Have you been drinking?" He heard her say.
He took a small step back and looked at her face, his arms still around her waist.
"Kyoko are you really here?"
"I can ask you the same question." She answered.
"Am I not imagining things?" Ren asked.
"You really have been drinking, haven't you? I can smell it." Her face darkened and Ren could sense that her caring attitude was about to kick in.
"You should take better care of yourself Tsuruga-san!" Concern was written across her face.
Then he knew. This was no hallucination nor a fragment of the mind. Kyoko was indeed here standing in his arms. He couldn't help but smile.
He dared to be a little bolder and pulled her inside and closed the front door.
"Back to Tsuruga-san now and here I thought we were on first-name basis." He flashed his gentlemen smile. He knew that she would pull away any second now.
Her eyes stood seriously, but she made no indication of moving.
"Ren." It was barely a whisper but it made him sharpen very sense in his body. Painfully aware of their close proximity he forced himself to keep breathing calmly. Her hands were resting on his chest and her eyes fixed on something on his shirt. He could see her mind think over all the possible things she would want to say.
"The letter you left me …" She paused mid-sentence, more thinking over her words. His fears were confirmed. He had scared her.
He forced himself to remove his hand from her waist and took another step back. Her eyes shot up to meet his.
"I'm sorry Kyoko. It was unprofessional of me. I shouldn't have confused you like that. Nor left in that manner."
"Are you taking it back?" Hurt was written across her face. He didn't want to see her like that. He wanted to protect her from any harm but this he had inflicted. He knew what he had to answer, but his heart didn't agree.
He loved her so terribly much.
"Only if you want me to." It was a safe answer, but it could cause irreversible harm to her. But he had been honest, even if he would never get to speak to her again. She needed to know.
"I don't."
He barely registered her words or her movement and the next thing he knew was her kissing him.
Her small figure pressed against his while her lips were softly caressing his.
Ren could only react. His arms snaked around her waist and pulled her even closer. His lips began to move against hers and she answered.
When air became a necessity they broke apart, both panting slightly.
"I love you too, Ren." She smiled.
A true smile formed on his lips and Ren had never been so happy that Yashiro had sent Kyoko the wrong letter that day as he kissed her again.
Dear Kyoko,
I'm sorry to leave you a letter only but as you know I have accepted to offer to star in a movie in the United States. However, filming will start earlier than I had expected and forces me to leave while you are still not back in Tokyo.
I regret not seeing you before I leave. I regret many things. But I promise to tell you when I return and I want you to keep me to it. For I have a tendency to run from my secrets.
Maybe it is best if I already tell you one of them. I have trouble expressing my true self but you have experienced him more than once. It is an inside battle I once was planning to win. to keep him at bay, to keep him somewhere in the deepest part of myself.
However, you made me realise that it was okay to enjoy life a bit more. Meeting you changed things for me, Kyoko. It opened my eyes to a side of acting; being challenged, I had long forgotten about.
Being around you, helps me calm down. You must have known this when we acted as the Heel siblings when you were, and you always will be my lucky charm.
The bottom line is, Kyoko, I am in love with you.
Terribly, hopelessly, messy in love with you.
Love, Ren.
I hoped you liked this little one shot. It has been on my mind for some time and wanted to share.
Love.