Hellsing binge! Hellsing binge! YAY Alucard! Go vamps! Go Hellsing! GO person who made it cause it wasn't me!

Let Sleeping Vampires Lie
A Hellsing Fanfic By Hika-Chan

With viturally nothing to do during the day Alucard was quite bored. Alright so he was really bored. Sure he could sleep but the fact was he wasn't tired, nor did he need it as much as humans or the young vampire police woman. A sudden thought occured to him and a grin spread itself across his face. Boredom always brought about a mischeivious streak in the vampire and who better to pull something on than his naive young fledgling? Besides her reactions were so fun to watch.

With little more than a thought he melded himself into the shadows. When he appeared again he was, quite literally, plastered to the inside of policewoman's coffin. His form little more than a shadow with eyes and a grin. Easily visible despite the darkness within.

She was on her side, sleeping in a t-shirt, the covers twisted about in an odd arrangement. Her head lay on the pillow, pulled close to push against her body. The shadow would have raised a brow had there been one in that form. His eyes travelled down as he noticed one of her bare slim legs thrown over an almost rolled up part of the cover. The other was cacooned in the sheet. Another curl of the cover went around her waist. His eyes widened a moment with realization as his grin grew wickedly. The sheets, cover and pillow were arranged so that it imitated a body. Is the police woman lonely? Or just a dreamer? He wondered, half mocking, half curious. He supressed a laugh, not wanting his latest "victim" to wake up just yet.

Slowly the mist grew off the lid slipping between the young undead and the pillow and sheets, a white gloved hand became solid, moving the bedding away as his body began to replace it, not wearing his hat or glasses. When he was once again solid, he stopped blocking his presence, it would not be long before she sensed him and awoke he was sure. Besides it would be much funnier to watch the slow realization dawn on her face.

Her head was rested on his left shoulder, left arm across his chest, the hand a few inches infront of her face. The other arm was below him, the hand grasping slightly onto his shoulder. His arm curled around down her back, hand resting on her hip barely covered by her t-shirt. Lastly there was the obvious fact that her leg was wrapped around his own.

"nnmmm..." he heard her moan slightly, her hand grasping his shirt tighter, pulling the now firmer "pillow" closer. Finding herself unable to move or squish the pillow closer to herself Celes wiggled herself closer to it, her leg squeezing his slightly to assist in her movement. She then tried to nuzzle her face into his chest, but finding the pillow too hard her face scrunched up slightly. "dumb pillow..." she murmured, pushing her head up slightly she pounded on the stubbornly firm pillow a few times.

Her vampire pillow jerked slightly and winced, more out of surprise then pain. She snuggled her face back into the now sore spot, effectively rubbing it for him. He stared down at her with an odd mix of disbelief, amusement and pride. She had quite a punch. For a moment he wondered if this was a bad idea, but then he just grinned again, nah, it wasn't like she could really hurt him. Another idea hit him and he spoke quietly, voice low little more than a whisper, "Police woman...Celes Victoria..."

"mmm? yes master?" she murmured, obviously hearing him and talking in her sleep.

"What are you doing?"

Her face scrunched up again and her gripped him tighter, "I.... I don't want to drink master..."

Alucard rolled his eyes, even in her sleep she refused to let go of her childish habit! He spoke again, puposefully giving his voice a husky quality, "Celes... look at me."

Her head moved slightly, "Master?" He raised a brow amused with the dreamy tone in her voice. "Master..Alu..card." She moved then, red eyes still closed in sleep, and she brought her hand up to his face. Alucard's eyes bulged when her lips touched his lightly. His hand instinctively came up to support her head, but he did not respond otherwise. She pulled back a short distance, "M...master I..."

"Embarassed even when you're dreaming police woman?" he whispered humoursly, "Wake up."


"Wake up," he repeated a bit louder.

"Mas.." her eyes cracked open, "-ter?"

He grinned widely, voice once again normal "Did I wake you Police woman?"

Her ruby eyes widened as she looked down at herself and the comprimising posistion she was in against her master. "Master!" She exclaimed rushing to sit up only to hit her head against the lid of her coffin. "Ow!" She cried, her head landing back on his chest. She rubbed the growing bump and heard her master whistle. "Master what are you-"

"You have dented the lid police woman, you should have Walter take a look at it later."

"I..huh.. wha..," she fumbled with the words, "Master what are you doing here!?" she asked blushing and looking up at him from her awkward angle.

A chuckle escaped his lips and she felt it shake in his chest against her face. "You are quite the clingly one are you not?"

She was about to ask what he meant when she suddenly realized her leg was still wrapped around his quite securely, and arm still across his body. She made a surprised squealing sound, ripping her arm off his chest and removing her leg. She was rolled onto her back but could not keep going, she forgot her right arm was trapped beneath his body. Her face all but glowed as she tugged on her arm. "Master.. could you..." but her voice was lost as his laughter filled the small dark space of the coffin. "Master?"

"If you act like this every evening police woman I will have to come see you wake up much more often," he laughed.

Agent Celes Victoria stared at her master with wide red eyes as he laughed. Slowly they narrowed, "Master..." she said in a warning tone.


"Get off my arm please..." she asked carefully, not really wanting to give into her budding anger.

He paused a moment, an expession that mocked thought on his face, "No, I think it's quite comfy, so I'll stay like this for a bit." with this he pulled his hands up and folded them under his head. "Quite a nice coffin you have here."


"No." he answered quite childishly.

"If you would plea-"


"But." she ground out.


That's it! Celes growled and punched her master in the stomach. While there was not that much force behind it, due to the lack of leverage she had, the shock was enough to get her master's upper body to curl up and for her to get her arm out from beneath him. He stared at her now propped up on his elbows, his hair bushing the lid. "Police woman!" he said, obviously quite shocked at her actions.

She stuck out her tounge then gave him a you-deserved-it-you-pig look. Then all at once she seemed to remember just who she had struck. She shrunk back, head immediately bowing down as she tried to push herself into the wall. "I'm sorry master..." she said quitely, "I didn't mean.. I just got angry an-" Once again she was cut off by his laughter. She raised her head and stopped her bizzare horizontal retreat. Alucard was once again laying on his back, one hand on his face. Celes stared at him, her eye beginning to twitch in disblief. "Ma.. .master?"

He held up a hand to her, "You are very amusing ploice woman. I am very glad you accepted my offer in Chedars."

"Is that so?"

He got his laughter under conrtol and turned his red eyes on her. She was maybe a foot from him, hand clutching the bottom of her night shirt, trying to keep it pulled down, the other arms propped her up. She seemed to study him, her crimson eyesfull of righteous indignation and some curiosity. "Yes," he answered simply.

She looked back into the eyes, one of the many things she inherited from him. "Master... why did you ask me?"

"hmmm?" he responded, laying his hands over his chest, her bed really was quite comfortable, I should see Walter about getting a new mattress.

"Why did you offer me the chance to be a vampire like you. What made you think I was worthy of such a thing?" It was a question that had been bothering her, since he so often killed the "trash" vampires, and they hadn't always been the FREAKs before she came along.

His grin shrunk down to a smirk, one that looked less disturbed and a little more genuine than his usual one. He looked her over again, though it looked more like he was considering his answer than checking her out. "There are many reasons," he finally said smoothly, looking back up at the wood grains on the lid.

After a several seconds of silence Celes realized he had no planes to continue talking. "And what would those be?" she asked timidly.

"heh," he grinned, "I'll tell you when you're older."

She looked quite put out by this answer. "That's it huh?"

He cast her a sideways glance, "Celes Victoria, this is not like some human birth where you were too young to remember. You were there, answer what you can yourself the rest I will tell you when you're older."

She sighed at his answer and lay back down from her half sitting posistion. I guess he won't tell me till he wants to... she thought. Of course I wasn't really expecting an answer anyway. Oddly enough her thoughts did not go back to the night she had questioned, but her thoughts did begin to circle around her master. After a minute the silence between the two undead was broken when she let out a yawm, but then it closed back in like the shadows decending on a blown out candle.

"Police woman," his voice interrupted her thoughts another minute later.

"Yes master?"

"You need not plaster yourself against the side," he said, "Come over here." He grinned wickedly at her, "I won't bite."

She couldn't help but laugh, "Yes you have already done that anyway," she said scooting up to him, taking a moment to pull the sheet up about herself, the rest of the bedding was on the other side of her master and she did not want to reach across him for it. She lay on her back down next to him, yawning again. "Are you going to sleep here master?" she asked voice tainted with her sleepiness.

He shrugged, his shoulders brushing hers, "not tired." he said in a noncommital way.

"mmm," she replied, blinking slowly, eyelids feeling suddenly heavier.

"Go back to sleep police woman."

"Good night master."

"Don't you mean 'good day'?" he chuckled turning his head to her.

A sleepy smile spread across her lips, "Good day master."

He smiled at the young undead as her eyes closed and he knew instantly that she was asleep, "Good day Police woman," he whispered.

well that was my first Hellsing Fanfic... Was Alucard oocat all? I've only seen the first 8 eps... oh well I wrote this in about an hour anyway... Hope you enjoyed it! please R&R!! :::]