Hello guys and gals! Name's djunk101, but you can just call me DJ, and welcome to my first fic! I've reading stories on this site 10 or 11 years now, and I've finally decided to throw my hat into the ring...sort of. You see, I don't consider myself much of an author, but I had idea for a fic and I really wanted to see it made, so I contacted one of my favorite authors Drake Wilson (check out his story To Love 'Ruto some time, it's amazing and the best "large harem" story I've ever read) and pitched this story to him. He was very busy at the time, but said he may help me out later when things weren't so jam packed. So I decided to work on planning things out in the meantime. That was back in February, so I've had plenty of time to develop things out. While I came up with the idea and premise and loosely outlined the long term plot, Drake Wilson typed this out and contributed plenty of ideas of his own, and probably will in the future as well, so it's probably best to consider him a co-author. The premise and planning of this fic was made long before Kaguya's backstory was shown in the anime recently, so it was not taken into account and will be ignored for the sake of what was planned. Anyway, I've blabbed on long enough, let's get this show on the road!
Disclaimer: I don't own either Naruto or Monster Musume no Iru Nichijou. If I did, there would have been a lot more Tayuya and Kaguya and a lot more Tio and Cathyl respectively.
The ninja of team seven braced themselves as they looked upon the Rabbit Goddess Kaguya as she stood before the writing ball of Bijuu chakra, the faces of the great chakra beasts twisting in agony as the 'Mother of All Chakra' bound them to her will. Pinned to the ground, Black Zetsu peered from the arm that had been severed from his mother, although her ability to perfectly create chakra limbs left her unaffected by a usually crippling injury. 'Soon Mother will end this!' It thought to itself, satisfied in the knowledge of his mother's superiority over the drained Ninja.
Team seven were all looking worse for wear, even Naruto and his clones were looking slightly drained. They were all encased in Kakashi's Susanoo, protecting them from Kaguya for the time being, although it was no secret to the tired ninja that their respite was only temporary.
"What the hell!" Naruto exclaimed as he stared up at the giant black orb before him as he stood within Kakashi's Susanoo. "That's the same as the balls I've got behind me." He jerked a thumb at the small black sphere floating behind him, "Except it's way bigger and it keeps getting larger and larger!"
"Kamui can't teleport something of that magnitude," Kakashi sounded tired, his body struggling to maintain the Susanoo, Obito's last gift to him. "Even if we were to run away by teleporting to the space-time dimension, if that thing keeps growing larger there is no way we'd be able to return."
"So we've got to stop it," Sasuke remarked bluntly.
"In other words," Naruto pointed at Kaguya, "We've got no choice but to seal the real body of that old, rabbit hag!"
"It would seem so." In spite at the seriousness of their situation, Sakura couldn't help but slightly smile at Naruto's remark. 'Trust that idiot to go around insulting the closest thing we'll ever see to a god.'
'You certainly talk a big game.' He heard Yin Kurama's voice. 'I'm assuming you have some sort of plan?'
'I'm working on it. I mean how hard could this be? We have Sasuke, Sakura-chan and Kakashi-sensei! Not to mention me.'
'We are screwed aren't we?'
"Huddle up…" Kakashi looked at his students, "Here's the plan. As the former team seven… This will be your final mission." He delivered the line sternly as Naruto and Sasuke stared down the Rabbit Goddess, "We're going to save the world."
"Hn," Sasuke grunted in the standard Uchiha style.
"Yeah!" Naruto declared, getting pumped up.
"Roger!" Sakura saluted, hanging back with Kakashi whilst watching her two fellow teammates get ready to face the biggest threat of their lives.
Kaguya merely looked at them with disdain, "I am immortal," She paused for dramatic effect, feeling slightly annoyed by the complete lack of response from Team Seven, "But if either one of you dies you will no longer be able to seal me. So then…" Kaguya narrowed her eyes. "Which of you shall it be?"
"I'LL BE YOUR OPPONENT BITCH!" Naruto declared boisterously.
'Classy.' Yin Kurama rolled its eyes.
'Bitch?' Kaguya's eye twitched. 'What a crude young man.'
"No," Sasuke stepped forward, "Let's take her on together. That way there's twice as much of a threat of being sealed for her." He glanced over his shoulder at Kakashi and nodded before turning back to Naruto, "Bring them along the way and send them flying!"
Kakashi charged Kaguya, his Susanoo raising its sword high as Naruto and Sasuke slipped from it, Naruto's clones surrounding them.
'Do they think I don't see them?' Kaguya glanced at Kakashi, deciding to eliminate him to prevent any distractions. She suddenly charged Kakashi with a speed even his sharingan was unable to track effectively, resulting in the rabbit goddess getting up close before he could even swing his sword. 'And this is where your tale ends. So sad but you brought this suffering on yourself. At least I will make your death painless. That is the least I can do.' She extended her palm and launched several Ash Killing Spears at the Susanoo, shattering it with minimal effort and watching dispassionately as a spear tore through Kakashi's chest. She scowled as the attack seemed to pass straight through Kakashi without injuring him,
'I really love this ability Obito,' Kakashi smirked as he closed in on the rabbit Goddess, who seemed taken aback by his survival. 'And now it is time to bring back this technique!' His hands flew through hand seals faster than the eye could track, casing his arm in lighting and lashing out at the Goddess, "KAMUI RAIKIRI!"
'What?!' Kaguya scowled as the attack struck her arm. 'This pain! My arm…" She scowled as the Jutsu interfered with her chakra limb, causing it to go unresponsive. Why…? Why do they resist?! Do they rejoice in suffering?! Do they not want peace?!' As she tried to regenerate the severed limb, her Byakugan picked up on two chakra sources charging her from two directions. 'I only need to remove one of them.' Kaguya frowned before she remembered all of the clones. 'Which one is the real one? I… I can't let them seal me! Not when I am this close to finally achieving peace!'
"MOTHER!" Black Zetsu called from the sleeve, trying to manipulate Kaguya's severed arm into launching an Ash Killing Spear.
'There's no time! I have to escape.' Kaguya leapt upwards. Launching a spear at Naruto as a distraction and relying on Zetsu to deal with Sasuke, Kaguya started to form a portal to escape and rethink her strategy. She watched as Naruto got impaled by the spear and dispersed into nothing with what was Sasuke becoming Naruto with a puff of smoke.
'So they were both Ashura's successor,' Kaguya thought to herself, somewhat impressed by the plan. 'He must have transformed when they fell from the chakra construct. Still it matters not,' She smirked as she saw the opening of a smaller portal, 'Soon you will be punished for defying a goddess and I shall be elsewhere, stranding your friends in this dimension. Their desire for war shall see that they never witness the harmony of my new world.' Her smirk vanished as she witnessed the tell-tale distortion of a Kamui and the attack aimed at Naruto vanished. 'I am really starting to hate that ability. I knew I should have eliminated him first.' She noticed one of the clone's turn into Sasuke. 'And now Indra's successor appears. They must be planning to seal me with a desperate last lunge.' She glanced at the portal she had formed. 'Almost there… Maybe I could send them to the Ice Dimension? No Indra's successor can use Amaterasu. That won't work! I just need to get anywhere other than here!' She tried to soar upwards but was shocked when she sensed someone appear just behind her, that someone being Sakura. 'Wait… She was in the Byakugan's blind spot? How did she know?!' Kaguya tried to avoid her attack, but the effort of opening the portal was slowing her down, just enough for the pink haired ninja to deliver a powerful punch and knock her towards the successors of Ashura and Indra, one of her horns breaking from the impact but it was of little concern to the rabbit goddess. 'THE PORTAL IS READY!' She smirked and dived for it.
"NOT SO FAST!" Naruto summoned a clone and kicked off of it for a burst of extra speed.
"This ends here!" Sasuke declared as he launched a giant fireball to propel him towards Kaguya.
'Almost there!' Kaguya suddenly felt a shiver through her entire body. 'No!' She glanced at the grinning Naruto and satisfied looking Sasuke. "You know not what you are about to do! This is the only way the world will know peace!"
"NOW!" Sasuke yelled as he reached out.
"SHANNARO!" Sakura yelled as the Naruto and Sasuke placed their palms against Kaguya.
"Yosh!" Naruto cried out as he felt the seal start to do its thing.
"No… This world's last chance for peace…" Kaguya whispered as she felt the seal start to sap her of her strength. She looked in despair as her regenerated limb disintegrated without her powers to maintain it. The portal was so close she could practically smell the other dimension but without her powers it was starting to crackle violently.
"NARUTO! SASUKE! Get out of there!" Kakashi roared, seeing the unstable portal swell, threatening to swallow them all.
"What?" Sasuke scowled at Kakashi as Naruto looked at the portal.
"Crap!" Naruto realized what was about to happen. The portal was starting to expand but the Uchiha was too busy trying to make out what Kakashi was saying to realize the potential danger. "GET OUT OF THE WAY TEME!"
"What did you…" Sasuke turned to face Naruto only to find the blonde's boot in his face, kicking him away from Kaguya. "What was that for… dobe?" Sasuke blinked as the portal suddenly expanded, swallowing Naruto and Kaguya, before vanishing, leaving only a faint distortion in space-time. "Dobe?" Sasuke repeated uncertainly.
"Where did Naruto go Kakashi-sensei?" Sakura glanced at Kakashi who was staring blankly into space.
"Naruto…" Kakashi lowered his head.
"...There are sacrifices in every war," Sasuke scowled at the floor. 'Idiot… Who does he think he is saving me?' He angrily glared at the distortion. 'How are we going to have our final battle now? You never think anything out.' He clenched his fists angrily.
"Sasuke-kun…" Sakura was shocked by Sasuke's words.
"As much as it pains me to agree with him, he is right," Kakashi shook his head sadly. "It… It is just like Naruto to put others before himself."
"Kakashi-sensei… stop that.'" Sakura whispered. "Stop acting like Naruto's dead! He can't be! He's… he's going to be the Hokage…" Her shoulders shuddered as she fought back the tears.
Before they could say anymore, the three ninja found themselves standing in the middle of a summoning circle.
"What the…" Sakura looked around.
"Welcome home Kakashi-kun, you looked tired." Minato laughed.
"Sensei…" Kakashi's shoulders slumped.
"Where is Naruto?" Minato looked around for his son.
"He…" Kakashi looked at the floor. "I am sorry Sensei… I couldn't save him."
"Pardon?" Minato blinked.
"He… He sacrificed himself to save me." Sasuke scowled.
"You'd better pray that isn't so." Kurama glared at the Uchiha. "I can still sense my Yin half, although it is growing weaker."
"Is he dying?" Matatabi glanced at the Nine tails.
"I don't think so… It's less like he is fading away and more like he is going further away. His energy isn't dropping just getting more distant." Kurama closed his eyes.
"You look sad Kurama. You must really like Naruto eh?" Gyuuki teased.
"W-what?!" Kurama glared at his fellow Bijuu, "I don't miss that idiot!"
"How tsundere Kyuubi," Minato smiled softly. 'To be able to win over the Kyuubi... You really are something special son. I know you're alright. I feel it in my heart. Plus, you're too much like your mother to let something like being sent into a different dimension to stop you.'
"I will end you Yondaime."
"And that went so well for you last time?"
Kurama closed his eyes with a faint smile. 'II suppose it actually did, at least in the long run.'
"Wait did the sealing work? Kaguya escaped to another dimension with Naruto! She could come back at any time!" Sakura interrupted Kurama's train of thought.
"Kaguya's powers have been sealed away, even if she herself has not." Hagoromo walked up to Sasuke who merely scowled in response.
"Er… Sasuke-kun, who is this?" Sakura asked.
"I believe you would know me as the Sage of Six Paths." He smiled.
"Do you know where Kaguya fled?"
"No, but without her powers it would be very difficult if not impossible for her to return. The world is safe."
"But what about Naruto?" Sakura asked angrily. "Can we get him back?"
"That… That would be most difficult," Hagoromo frowned.
"But you were able to summon all of us weren't you?" Sasuke pointed out.
"Yes but I knew where you all were," The Sage shook his head. "I have no idea where Ashura's successor is right now. If Kaguya still had her power, I might be able to track her given the strength she had but… I am afraid Naruto must make his own way back."
"He'll do it," Sakura declared.
"Hn," Sasuke nodded curtly. "That idiot has the weirdest luck."
"He's Kushina-chan's son," Minato smiled softly. "He'll definitely make his way back home."
"I was hoping to see if Naruto and Sasuke could finally end the brother's hatred…" Hagoromo looked at Sasuke, "The Legacy of Indra and Ashura, but it appears as if that will not happen." He closed his arms and put his palms together, "And with this… The Infinite Tsukuyomi ends."
"Just like that?" Sakura blinked.
"Indeed," Hagoromo opened his eyes. "Your friends are free and my duty here is done. I pray that Naruto returns to this dimension. Maybe then the brother's conflict can finally have a satisfying conclusion."
"I hope so," Sakura mumbled, her confidence faltering as she saw the survivors of the rookie eleven make their way towards her. "I really hope so..." She looked away, unable to take the look of fear on Hinata's face.
"W-where is Naruto-kun?" She frowned. "I can't see him."
"The dobe got himself sent to another dimension."
"W-well can't we get him back?" Hinata asked.
"Dimensional travel isn't that simple." Kakashi smiled weakly.
"But you can do it right?" Kiba stepped forward.
"He is gone. Accept it." Sasuke stated bluntly.
"Naruto…" Hinata stepped backwards as if she had been struck.
"Er… Sasuke-kun…" Sakura stepped forward.
"He never gave up on you!" Kiba advanced on the Uchiha angrily. "But you would just give up on him that easily?!"
"I never asked him to get involved in my life."
"You bastard!" Kiba growled and stepped forwards.
"K-Kiba-kun," Hinata tried to stop her teammate as Sakura tried to defuse the situation.
'You've barely been gone for ten minutes and already everyone is at each other's throats.' Sakura bit her lip. 'Please come back soon Naruto. '
Naruto blinked stupidly as he stared at an empty eyed Kaguya. The two of them were surrounded by completely featureless white space. There was no wind, no noise, nothing. His mind told him he was falling but there was no air rushing past him and his clothes remained flat against his body.
"So…" Naruto coughed awkwardly after what had seemed like an eternity to him, "Are you going to attack me?"
"...You don't understand what you have done do you?" Kaguya sounded tired.
"Hopefully I stopped you," Naruto rubbed the back of his head awkwardly.
"Oh you did that," Kaguya went to clap, before realizing that she was an arm short, staring at the loose Kimono sleeve hanging from her left shoulder. "You won! Congratulations. You just stopped the last chance of peace for the entire world. Tell me… how do you like your reward?"
Naruto fidgeted awkwardly. "Did we die?"
"If this is purgatory… that is possible." Kaguya frowned.
"Can't you open a portal to escape?"
"How?" Kaguya snapped. "You've stripped me of my chakra! We are stuck in this space between dimensions until we reach the exit. I… I have never created a portal this long before."
"You mean the seal worked?" Naruto sighed in relief. "Wait… did I seal myself with you?! How am I going to become Hokage if I am sealed away!"
"I told you we are in a space between dimensions," Kaguya scowled at the panicking blond. "Your seal only affects me and even then it was only a partial effect," Kaguya glared at him. "All the chakra I had has been stripped."
"Everything for your coils is sealed away?"
"Coils?" Kaguya chuckled mirthlessly. "I don't have chakra coils. Hagoromo was the one who created them in humanity! My power stemmed from… another source."
"That is one name for it I suppose." Kaguya conceded. "At least one that someone as limited as you could comprehend. I was a Goddess until you cast me from my throne with your desire for eternal war."
"I have no love of war! I wanted to stop the war that was happening and that's why I stopped you!" Naruto scowled.
"If you truly wanted the war to end you could have just surrendered rather than prolong the war and suffering."
"You had everyone trapped in a Genjutsu and sucked their chakra from them!"
"And is that so wrong?" Kaguya frowned. "They were happy! They had their dreams realized! There was peace but now… now there will be naught but more anger, hatred and death. That is your victory."
"You have little faith in people don't you," Naruto shook his head. "Well I guess I'll just have to show you the error of your ways."
"I have witnessed the darkness of humanity. I know too well your legacy of hate and war." Kaguya put her arm on her hip. "I will not be swayed by your words."
"Sure humanity is pretty dark at times," Naruto nodded, "But there is light in there as well! I mean, did you see us? We all allied together, all the villages united as one to stop you! There is hope for humanity."
"You are a naive fool," Kaguya scoffed.
"Well you are just a cynical old rabbit hag!"
"I may no longer be a goddess but I am a Princess! You will address me as such."
"Okay Princess Rabbit Hag."
"I will not be drawn into your childish games." Kaguya declared.
Naruto opened his mouth to retort when suddenly his entire body jerked as if someone had tugged sharply on a rope wrapped around his waist.
He blinked and found himself laid down on a strange black material with white lines on it. Glancing around his saw massive buildings that looked incredibly foreign to him. Some were made from glass and seemed to be so tall they dwarfed the Hokage Monument.
People wearing strange outfits had stopped and were looking at them, some of them had pulled strange devices from their pockets and were pointing them at him. Straining his senses, he failed to detect any chakra from them, although he could understand what they were saying, or at least most of it anyway. He wasn't sure what Nico Nico Douga was or what uploading meant but parts of their language was recognizable to him. Apparently he was stood on a road and the strange metal things racing by him making strange honking noises were cars.
As he took in his strange surroundings, he saw Kaguya struggling to stand with her one arm. She glared at him as he walked towards her.
"Stay back!" She barked at Naruto "I will not be pitied by your kind!"
"Eh?" Naruto blinked as Kaguya stood up.
"You who profit from war will gain no satisfaction from me. Argh!" Kaguya pointed her arm at Naruto, "I… I have lost all of my powers…" She mumbled as she attempted to launch an Ash Killing Spear at Naruto with no success "And I am trapped in this strange dimension…" She clenched her fist angrily. "I have failed my dimension and this… this is my hell."
"You… You can't use any of your powers?" Naruto bit his lip uncertainly.
'This could be a trap.' Kurama warned him.
'I don't know. Look at her.' Naruto felt sorry for the former goddess. 'She's just had all of her plans derailed and her powers stolen.'
'She tried to kill everyone.'
'I think… I think she was trying to save them in her own way. Just a really messed up and completely wrong way.'
'... I may not be the original Kurama that was sealed within you but I have a vague recollection of his memories, enough to know that you always see the best in people and somehow get them to see it too… Although if you win her over I think we can upgrade your 'Friendship Power' from impressive to Godly.'
Naruto walked towards the distraught princess, suddenly crouching as he noticed movement out of the corner of his eye and turned to face the new threat. It was a strange metal vehicle, kind of like the train he had seen previously whilst in the Land of Spring except this didn't seem to run on tracks. He could make out an angry man through a glass window on front of the vehicle who was pointing at Kaguya and gesturing wildly for her to move.
"Er… Princess Bunny Hag?" Naruto coughed awkwardly.
"What?" Kaguya noticed the rapidly approaching vehicle, it's wheels locked up as it struggled to stop. "Oh..." 'Without my powers… I guess there is no point in trying to escape. My only victory is that the Ashura's successor will be trapped here.' She closed her eyes and awaited the embrace of death.
"What the hell?!" Naruto raced towards her. 'Kurama! I need some more chakra! I'm running on empty!'
'Sorry kid. I don't know why but your chakra system is busted. I'm working on fixing it but it will take a few more minutes.'
'I don't have enough time!" Naruto dived at the strangely relaxed Kaguya, pushing her out of the way of the truck and onto a raised sidewalk.
"W-what?" Kaguya opened her eyes and met Naruto's. 'Is that… concern? Why would someone who profits from war be concerned about my wellbeing?!'
He noticed her curious expression and smiled, just as the truck hit him, skidding forwards a good twelve feet as other vehicles swerved and crashed into each other.
In a matter of minutes, the road had become a warzone, with crashed cars and angry humans getting out of them. Amongst the angry yells and confused cries, Kaguya sat on the sidewalk confused.
"Why?" Kaguya continued to stare at the spot where she had made eye contact with Naruto. "Why did he do that?"
Several Minutes Earlier
"I hate my job sometimes," Kuroko Smith groaned as she sat in her favorite cafe, nursing a lukewarm cup of coffee, her usual appreciation for the caffeinated beverage dulled by the sheer magnitude of the task before her. Several folders lay on her table, problem cases for her agency. Each one has a red stamp across the front [APPLICATION TO HOST PROGRAM DENIED: COHABITATION IMPOSSIBLE].
She crossed her legs, adjusting her tights under her skirt before returning her attention to the documents. Absentmindedly brushing a speck of dust from her suit jacket.
All of them were declared too dangerous or troublesome to be allowed a human handler. Usually this would have just resulted in their applications being rejected and that was that but in this case, these girls were ones Kuroko had interviewed herself and knew that they were fit for introduction into human life. Unfortunately, when she had pointed this out to her superiors, they had decided if they girls truly were capable of learning to live alongside humans, the Ms. Smith would be the one to set them up with a suitable host. Usually this wouldn't have been too hard, Kuroko has access to a database of all registered hosts and with the help of a few key phrases she could have her host greeting his or her new arrivals within a day. She had mastered the art of assigning hosts to maximize the time she had for personal pursuits and initially had thought that it would be easy to find suitable hosts for these 'dangerous' girls.
Unfortunately for Kuroko, these girls required a special case, the handler would have to be far stronger than the average human in order to maximize his chances of survival. There were a few handlers that could have satisfied this criteria, but not a lot.
Next they would have to be kind and calming, considering the easily agitated nature of some of the girls. This left two hosts.
Finally, they would have to live in a remote area or at the very least be prepared to move to a remote area. This would allow the girls to gradually become accustomed to light human traffic and grow more comfortable with human interaction before throwing them in the deep end on a city visit. This was where things became difficult: None of the registered hosts were prepared to move and all of them lived in the city center.
Kuroko was at her wit's end. These girls (and her spare time) were counting on her to solve the handler issue quickly and promptly.
"But where am I going to find such a person?" Kuroko took her sunglasses off and rubbed her forehead before replacing the glasses and standing up, tucking the files under her arm and leaving the store, half drank coffee left forgotten in her frustration. As she got out she saw a strange Liminal, one that she couldn't place, stood in the middle of the road. A blonde male, probably her handler, was talking to her but it didn't look as if the one armed Liminal was paying any attention.
"Great a handler who can't control his Liminals," Kuroko scoffed. "Some of these handlers must have paid someone to get put on the register, probably hoping for a 'cute cat girl' or something." She sighed. "Oh crap. I left my coffee behind!" She noticed the approaching truck. "That's not good. GET OFF OF THE ROAD!" She watched in shock as the human pushed the strange looking woman out of the way of the vehicle, taking the hit in her place. The Liminal was pushed onto the sidewalk, staring blankly at the spot where her handler had been.
"Damn it," Kuroko cursed and ran over as the stunned Liminal stood staring into space.
"What the hell you damn monster!" The driver of the truck that had struck the handler kicked his door open and dived out of his truck, making a beeline for the stunned woman. "What did you think you were doing?"
"This is a Liminal incident," Ms. Smith cleared her throat.
"Damn monsters shouldn't be allowed out if they can't follow orders! How am I going to be able to work knowing I killed a man? Say your government right? I'd better get some compensation for this crap!"
"I will deal with your complaints in a moment," She noticed that many other cars had crashed in their attempts to miss the truck and a whole horde of angry people were starting to congregate around the silent Liminal. "Not good," She pressed a concealed button on the inside of her suit, sounding the silent alarm to the MON squad. "Listen everyone! I know that you are all angry but…"
"SON OF A BITCH!"
"...Eh?" The angry crowd went silent as the sound of metal groaning reverberated from the front of the truck and the blonde human staggered towards them, blood leaking from a cut on his forehead but otherwise unharmed. "What is that?!"
"Er… Sir?" Ms. Smith blinked. "Are you okay?"
"Huh?" Naruto shook his head, clearly the fog from his brain. "Oh crap! Princess Bunny Hag!"
"Who?" Ms. Smith tilted her head as Naruto ran over to Kaguya.
"Hey you in there?" Naruto reached out to shake Kaguya but she grabbed his outstretched arm tightly.
"Why… Why did you save me? Do you want me to suffer this… this weakness?"
"Weakness?" Naruto looked thoughtful, "Okay so you've lost your powers but it isn't all that bad. So you can't fight anymore but didn't you say you wanted peace? Isn't this better for you?"
"How can I achieve peace if I can't fight?"
"Peace shouldn't be achieved by fighting. That's why your peace would never work." Naruto sat down next to Kaguya. "Peace can only be achieved by two people sitting down and understanding each other. Okay?"
"...Your argument makes some sense," Kaguya agreed. "But some people are unwilling to listen and see things from another's point of view."
"Well in that case you just have to try harder to get them to hear you." Naruto nodded sagely.
"Is that so?" Kaguya frowned as she stared at Naruto. "That is a very simplistic way of looking at things. Peace by talking would be nice but it is a child's dream."
"Maybe," Naruto admitted, "But I won't know unless I try."
"What a strange human you are," Kaguya shook her head.
"I don't understand what is going on here," Ms. Smith cleared her throat, "But I am afraid I need you both to come with me."
"Why?" Naruto asked.
"I am afraid that you will have to have your permit revoked."
"...My what?" Naruto blinked.
"Your Handler's Permit."
"...What?" Naruto repeated.
"You… You are a handler right?"
"I have no idea what you are talking about. I am a ninja."
"That's right. She's a Bunny Goddess."
"...Okay," Kuroko nodded to the paramedics who started to examine Naruto. "Clearly you have taken some brain damage. It isn't a surprise. If anything the fact that you appear so healthy is a surprise. You were just hit by… I'd say about twenty tonnes at high speed. How are you alive?" 'If he could survive that then he could survive anything! If he isn't her handler yet tried to save her… Maybe the solution to my nightmares has just landed itself in my lap'
"Oh that's easy." Naruto laughed. "I just used chakra to protect myself." 'I would have been able to avoid all this hassle if someone had been a little faster in providing me with some.'
'Hey, we both lost a lot of chakra fighting Kaguya. Not my fault that you wasted almost all of yours and had to wait on me to channel what little I had left you. Give me some credit that you aren't a smear on the front of that thing.' Kurama grumbled.
"Chakra?" Ms. Smith frowned. "Isn't that something to do with meditation?"
Before Naruto could answer, there was a cry of alarm and Kaguya found herself pulled to her feet by one of the drivers.
"Let go of me! Do you know who it is you touch?!" Kaguya pulled herself free from the irate driver.
"Bitch did you see what you did to my new car?" He snarled at her. "Who is going to reimburse me huh?!"
"You say that as if it is my concern," Kaguya brushed her kimono. "My mind is burdened by greater concerns than that of the lower classes." 'Like how am I going to get back home and save my world from the wars that will one day destroy it.'
"Lower… Who the hell do you think you are?!" The driver went to punch Kaguya.
"Sir!" Ms. Smith mentally cursed. 'If he hits her…'
"HEY!" Naruto erupted into a golden aura, a giant golden hand grabbing the man and lifting him up.
"What the… another new Liminal?" Ms. Smith blinked.
"Were you really going to hit a defenseless woman?!" Naruto yelled at the driver.
"P-put me down! You… You monster!"
"...Like I haven't heard that before." Naruto's fringe covered his eyes. "But if you ask me," He looked up, his blue eyes piercing the very soul of the driver. "Those who would attack a harmless old lady are the real monsters."
"Old?" Ms. Smith looked at Kaguya. 'She doesn't look that much older than me. Wait… Does that mean I look old?' Before she could have a image crisis, a familiar voice sounded in her ear.
[I'm in position.] A soft voice sounded in Ms. Smith's concealed earpiece.
"Manako," Smith let out a happy sigh. "Wait for my signal. Please drop him," She called out to Naruto. "I am afraid should you attack you will be deported to your homeland."
'Hah! I'd like to see her try.'
"I can't just stand back and let someone get hurt for something that wasn't their fault." Naruto dropped the man. "That being said I am not here to cause trouble." He glanced over his shoulder at the top of the building and scowled.
"Manako?" Smith hissed. "What's wrong?!"
[He… He looked at me right in the eye!]
"That's not possible," she glanced at Naruto, still clad in his golden cloak. "You are on the top of an eighty floor building!"
"Huh?" Naruto frowned. "Never seen a girl with one eye before. I mean Kaguya has… had three." He glanced at the sullen goddess. 'Although I guess the third eye relied on chakra so she lost that when Sasuke and I sealed her.'
"Pardon?" Ms. Smith blinked.
"Oh there is a girl with one eye on top of that building.' Naruto pointed.
[He's pointing right at me!]
"What kind of a Liminal are you?" Kuroko asked.
"Liminal?" Naruto blinked.
"Like how I am a human," Ms. Smith explained.
"Oh I'm a human too," Naruto nodded and dispelled his cloak.
"And she's… er…" Naruto glanced at Kaguya.
"I am not of this world," Kaguya remarked.
"Well…" Kuroko let out a sigh of relief as a giant figure completely covered in a giant bomb disposal suit walked towards them. "Tionishia. I'm glad you were able to make it."
"Wow…" Naruto looked up at the eight-foot-tall behemoth.
"Could I persuade you to come with me? Peacefully preferably."
"...Okay." Naruto nodded. "What about PRH?"
"PRH?" Smith blinked.
"Princess Rabbit Hag," Naruto smirked, "It's quicker and easier to say that."
"She will come with us." Smith nodded to Tionishia, who carefully picked up Kaguya.
"Unhand me you giant beast!" Kaguya demanded.
"Huh," Naruto chuckled as the giant figure threw Kaguya over her shoulder and followed Kuroko. 'To think literally an hour ago she was the biggest threat to the Elemental nations…'
'Hehehe… Karma's a bitch!' Kurama chuckled.
"Is something funny?" Kaguya (resigned to her fate) glared at Naruto as he trailed behind the ogre.
"N-No…" Naruto smiled weakly and stepped back. 'She might not have her chakra but she has one hell of a glare…'
'It was all Naruto's fault!'
'She can't hear you."
'I'm not taking any chances.' Kurama mumbled.
Cultural Exchange HQ
Naruto looked around curiously as he sat at a large wooden table. Kaguya and himself had both been dragged into the office and left there, the giant behemoth clad in armor standing over them. Ms. Smith was sat opposite him, currently reading a few files, biting her lip occasionally and jotting things down in a notebook.
"So," Naruto coughed awkwardly. "What do you want to talk about?"
Ms. Smith looked at him over the top of her sunglasses and sighed. "Well… We are currently waiting on some forms to carry out a few tests on you. Nothing too serious."
"Tests?" Naruto felt his heart thudding in his chest. 'No fair! I thought I was done with tests!'
'Say Naruto? Aren't you still a Genin? Wouldn't that mean you have the Chuunin and Jounin exams still to do?'
'What? I saved the world damn it! That's gotta be worth a promotion to at least Jounin!'
"Basically you will provide us with a sample and we will send it down to our labs," Ms. Smith returned her attention to her files.
"Oh, Okay," Naruto nodded and returned to looking around the room. There were various things that he didn't recognize. "Hey what's that thing?" he whispered to Kaguya nodding at a large black machine with a small gap, roughly big enough to fit your hand in. It had several buttons and a display that simply displayed 'NO CHANGE.'
"Why are you asking me?" Kaguya glared at the strange contraption. "It is probably some sort of torture device used on those who want to overthrow the ruling dynasty, hence the words 'No Change.' Of course I will not be tortured as I am a noble. You on the other hand…"
"W-what do you mean? I'm technically a prince if you think about it. "
"Well my dad was the leader of my village," Naruto pointed out. "That would make him like a king and me a prince right? And you're the Rabbit Princess so technically we are equally noble from a certain point of view."
"No." She firmly denied Naruto's logic and fixed him with a soul-searing glare, "I refuse to share my noble title with you!"
"Geez," Naruto looked away, the intensity of her glare unnerving him.
"It is an interesting device isn't it?" Kaguya turned her glance to the strange contraption. "Maybe… Maybe they put your hand in that slot and press some of those buttons and the different buttons inflict a different torture."
"Maybe one pulls out your fingernails, another keeps cutting you with increasingly deeper cuts until your hand is shredded like confetti."
"Y-you think?" Naruto gulped. "How do you know so much about torture? Are you some sort of sadist?!"
"A noble never dirties their own hands. It is our duty to be the paragon of what everyone should aspire to be."
"So when did you give up on that idea and settle for being some mad genocidal bunny hag?" Naruto flinched under her glare.
"Back when I was a child we had a torturer," Kaguya shook her head sadly. "It was a sad thing that such a person was necessary to protect my people."
"Why did you need one?"
"How can I protect those I am sworn to care for if I do not know what threats exist. My enemies were seldom kind enough to send me a letter containing all of their plans."
"Well…" Naruto faltered. "Even so I don't believe torture is the way forward."
"Oh and your village didn't have any torturers?"
"Er…" Naruto looked away awkwardly.
"That's what I thought," Kaguya nodded, feeling smug, although this feeling evaporated rather quickly when Ms. Smith walked over to the strange machine. Naruto and Kaguya suddenly felt very nervous.
"Ladies first I suppose," Ms. Smith turned to Kaguya.
"Torture Ashura's inheritor if you must but I will never speak!" Kaguya declared.
"Yeah!" Naruto nodded. "Wait… What did you say?"
"Torture?" Ms. Smith chuckled. "I know the coffee here is pretty grim but I wouldn't go that far."
"Coffee?" Kaguya and Naruto glanced at each other before watching Ms. Smith press several buttons and a small plastic cup appeared in the opening, which Ms. Smith took out and sipped before grimacing.
"The person who built this contraption should be arrested for crimes against caffeine," She muttered before sitting down, "Are you sure I can't get you anything to drink?"
"I used to be impartial to a glass of wine," Kaguya nodded. "Left in a cellar for 250 years and made from the finest grapes. It used to cost as much as an entire village. A drink such as that would be fine for my tastes."
"I don't think we have anything that expensive," Ms. Smith sweat dropped.
"Water's fine with me," Naruto beamed.
"Now that we can accommodate." Ms. Smith walked over to him and handed him the drink, which Naruto quickly drank. "Let me take that back," She smiled and put the cup in a sealed bag before walking over to Tionishia and taking a long silvery strand of hair from her armor and putting it in another bag and handing it to the giant armored woman. "Here takes these to the lab and you can get out of that armor now. Thanks," Ms. Smith watched her leave and returned to the table. "Now then… I have a few questions for you."
"I'm ready for anything!" Naruto declared despite the hunted look in his eyes.
"Well then, first of all I need your names, age and gender."
"Well this is Princess Rabbit Hag, she is ridiculously old and possibly female and I am…" Naruto said as he started to introduced them.
"This is Ashura's Inheritor." Kaguya interrupted him. "Possibly male as I have yet to meet a female with such poor personal hygiene. His mental age I would estimate as around 5 years old."
"My name is Naruto Uzumaki, dattebayo!" Naruto scowled. "Age… er what day is it?"
"Oh then I'm 17." Naruto blinked. "Male in case you were wondering."
"And I am her royal highness, Kaguya Otsutsuki the Rabbit Goddess. As for my age and gender, it is not done to ask a noble lady for her age."
"Because she so damn old." Naruto added helpfully.
"So that's Naruto and Kaguya right?" She looked at Naruto. "As in the blonde chef?"
"Huh?" Naruto looked confused.
"What a stupid name," Kaguya snorted.
"Wait? You didn't know my name?" Naruto looked at Kaguya who merely shrugged
"I am a noble, why should I need to know your name?" She looked at her fingernails on her one hand. "All that is required is that you know my name and address me with the respect I am due from my noble birth"
"So where are you both from?" Ms. Smith tried to cut off the argument.
"The Elemental Nations, land of Fire for me. A village called Konoha, you've probably heard of it." Naruto remarked. "I'm kind of a big shot there."
"Never heard of it," Ms. Smith smiled apologetically, "Where is it on this map," She pushed a tablet across the table to Naruto.
"Er… Wow what is this?" Naruto started playing with the screen.
"What a strange device." Kaguya also leaned forwards.
"The map moves when I swipe my finger across it!"
Ms. Smith couldn't help but smile as the two started to play with the tablet.
"As a noble, you should leave such devices in my control. You would only damage them with your limited intelligence." She looked at the map. "But to answer your question, this map is not familiar to me."
"Or me," Naruto added.
"I would be surprised if you even recognized a map of your home village. The common class were not meant to read, merely to farm and live their lives."
"I don't have a clue how to farm."
"Then you truly are a failure." Kaguya remarked.
"Well then," Kuroko took the tablet back. "I guess I'll put you down as Tokyo."
"That's where we are now."
"Never heard of it."
"Never…" Ms. Smith blinked. "Are you from some sort of lost tribe that never made contact with humanity or something."
"Or something," Kaguya and Naruto replied in sync.
"I see," She chuckled. "Well I have registered you on the system. The test results have come back. Apparently you are human," She glanced at Naruto, "And you…" She looked at Kaguya, "Well we've never seen anything like you."
"That doesn't surprise me," Kaguya smirked.
"Now… You see the little trouble you caused this morning means you probably won't be welcome in town for a while but, I'll tell you something. I know a place you can lay low. It's an exclusive property and you are free to remodel it however you like. There will be very few people nearby so you don't have to worry about noise. In fact, this is a prime real estate opportunity I am only offering you because after talking to you, I think you are the kind of person I could entrust this place to."
"Well that's kind and everything but I'm planning to go back home," Naruto smiled.
"Do you know how to get back home?"
"Er… Not really," Naruto admitted and glanced at Kaguya, who raised an eyebrow at his questioning look.
"What? I have no chakra remember? Even if I did, I can't guarantee that I could find my way home. Even if I could what makes you think that I would take you with me?" Kaguya scoffed.
"My winning personality?"
"Was that a joke? I do not understand your lower class humor." Kaguya frowned.
"That wasn't supposed to be a joke…" Naruto slumped over in his chair.
"Moving on," Ms. Smith tried to get the conversation back on track. "Why not take me up on my offer? All I ask is that you help me out with my tasks."
"Tasks?" Naruto narrowed his eyes, aware of the sort of 'tasks' that would be asked of missing nin in his home.
"As I'm sure you have noticed," Ms. Smith smiled softly. "There are many girls like Kaguya here."
"Trust me, there is no one like me here."
"These girls," Ms. Smith continued, ignoring Kaguya's comment, "All have special needs that mean they cannot be cared for by a normal human."
"Why would they need caring for at all?"
"...You really are from some back of the woods kind of place aren't you?" Ms. Smith chuckled. "Okay have you heard of the Cultural Exchange Between Species Bill? Or the Interspecies Exchange Bill as it is also known."
"The what?" Naruto's blank face was mirrored by Kaguya.
"... To summarize a few years ago, demi-humans or Liminals if you prefer, and humanity signed an agreement to live alongside each other." Ms. Smith smiled, "The Interspecies Exchange Bill is basically an agreement to help humans and other races grow used to each other. In essence a handler is assigned a Liminal and is responsible for their behavior, to help them get used to everyday life."
"So basically all I'm asking is if you help someone adjust to a human presence!" Ms. Smith smiled.
"But I'm not that well informed on… this place," Naruto pointed out.
"True, but you are human," Ms. Smith pointed out. "That is all that the bill requires of a handler."
"Okay." Naruto accepted this.
"I am a coordinator so I will be there to support you and any Liminal guests you receive." Ms. Smith "Don't you think that's a good deal? You get a free house and will receive an allowance to help you live and I don't tell the police where the two individuals who caused a massive pile up in the middle of a busy intersection are."
"So blackmail then?" Kaguya frowned.
"Blackmail is such an ugly term." Ms. Smith smiled over her glasses. "I am just giving you a chance to help people in need."
"Why me? Don't you have other handlers?"
"These girls are special amongst the Liminals. They are too dangerous in the eyes of the ambassadors but after interviewing them, I can tell they are good people who dream of being more integrated into society. That's why I need a special human. You are the last chance for these girls. You aren't going to let them down are you? You have a dream right? How would you feel if someone selfishly denied you the chance to achieve your dream?"
'My dream… How would I feel if I was denied the chance to become Hokage… Hell if I can't get back I won't be able to do it at all, will I?" He felt hollow just thinking about it. 'No… I will become Hokage! I'll find a way back! But while I'm here I might as well help people out right?'
'This woman is dangerous. Within a matter of minutes, she has already got your weakness identified. I foresee more of this in the future.' Kurama chuckled. 'Well it should be interesting if nothing else.'
"I guess I can help you out," Naruto remarked. "But only until I find my way back home."
'Fool,' Kaguya shook her head. 'Being so easily manipulated. Being a bleeding heart will only get you killed. No wonder you opposed my peace. You are far too small minded to understand the bigger picture beyond what's right in front of you.'
"Excellent!" Ms. Smith clapped her hands happily. "I'll have your transport arranged and since I'm guessing you don't have a cell phone, I'll throw one of those in free of charge."
"Now shoo!" Ms. Smith sipped her coffee. "I have people to call."
Some Time Later
"She did say an exclusive property right?" Naruto blinked as he stood before his new 'house'.
Shortly after their meeting, Naruto and Kaguya had been put into a car and driven for what seemed like an eternity to the blonde ninja. Finally, the car pulled to a halt near a giant lake and the two dimensionally displaced travelers got out of the car, which drove away before they could ask any questions.
"I am not sleeping in that." Kaguya scowled. "As a noble I will settle for only the finest of residences!"
Naruto looked at the ruined farmhouse with a sigh. It was in need of some severe restoration work, though it was practically a mansion in size, if not in appearance. "A farm."
"A run down farm," Kaguya corrected as she looked at the weed infested fields and various barns in disrepair. "One not managed in some time I would imagine."
"You know about farming?"
"No," Kaguya looked insulted. "That is the work of the common people. I have visited many a farm in my duties as a Princess." She smiled. "My people would always look so happy to see me."
"Huh," Naruto smiled softly at the fond look on Kaguya's face. "Can I ask you something?"
"If you must."
"Why did you agree to come with me?"
"Pardon?" Kaguya raised an eyebrow.
"Well Ms. Smith gave you the choice of entering the program or simply going with me."
"As much as it pains me to admit, without my powers I am… less useful than I would like to be." Kaguya frowned. "Despite this you chose not to finish your job. When you speak it is not of war and hatred but peace, even if it is a misguided one. There may yet be hope for you."
"Thanks?" Naruto chuckled.
"Indeed," Kaguya noted, "You should be grateful that I, Kaguya, have decided to grace you with my presence. I am sure as your tenure as my servant you will develop some class and might even be able to pass for a very minor noble when I am finished with you."
"Servant?" Naruto frowned.
"But of course," Kaguya smirked. "After all you are responsible for my current state are you not?"
"And I am helpless, as you are so keen to point out."
"That is true but…"
"So it seems to me the only decent thing for you to do is assist me in my daily routine."
"I suppose the little things might…."
"So go on servant," Kaguya declared. "Build me a house worthy of my presence."
"For someone who has lost all of their power, you are sure bossy," Naruto frowned as he summoned a small army of clones. "Fortunately I had plenty of experience repairing buildings on my training trip with Ero-sennin." He smirked before frowning softly. "To think all I did was yell at him for wasting my time and not training me. What I'd do for just one more day…" He closed his eyes.
"What do you think you are doing?!" Kaguya barked. "You wasteful servant!"
"Eh?" Naruto frowned. "You asked me to fix the building?"
"I didn't tell you to waste my chakra!"
"I am the mother of all chakra," Kaguya put her arm on her hip.
"Is that so," Naruto grinned as summoned his golden cloak, creating several crude hands that started to make obscene gestures at her.
"S-stop that!" Kaguya ordered as Naruto cackled before setting to work repairing the house, "Idiotic servant," She grumbled as she sat down on the grass, watching Naruto and his clones swarm the building with a single minded purpose that was almost impressive and would have earned him an iota of respect from Kaguya, at least it would have if not for the fact that half of the house suddenly caved in no less than ten minutes into his work, killing off a fair few clones, which Naruto replaced.
"Wasting my chakra!" Kaguya mumbled under her breath. Still she couldn't say that he wasn't working hard. A small group of clones broke free and started to cut down a few trees from the nearby forest, making sure to plant seeds in place of the cut down tree before setting to work cutting it into timber by using wind chakra (another waste of her chakra).
"Servant!" Kaguya clicked her fingers and the original Naruto appeared in a flash of yellow.
"What?" Naruto crossed his arms, his forehead sweaty.
"I require entertainment."
"That's your problem," Naruto turned to go back to the house.
"What a worthless servant you are," Kaguya sighed. "Tell me, why did you not tell Lady Sunglasses that you had no interest in looking after me?"
"Why?" Naruto chuckled. "Well you're probably my only way back."
"I see," Kaguya nodded. "As painful as it is to admit, we both require each other."
"For the time being," Naruto nodded.
"Very well then." Kaguya nodded. "I declare a truce my lucky Servant."
"My name's Naruto."
"And a stupid name it is," Kaguya remarked. "I shall address you as servant. It is far more dignified than some sort of ramen ingredient."
"Then I guess I'll call you Kaguya."
"You shall address me as Lady Kaguya, The Rabbit Goddess and Princess of the… I believe they are now called the Elemental Nations?"
"How about just Princess Kaguya or Rabbit Goddess?"
"The Rabbit Goddess accepts this." Kaguya nodded.
"Here," Naruto reached out to her.
"What are you doing? The help should never touch their masters you worthless servant!"
"A peace offering. The old sage told me how to use my chakra to heal, not like medical chakra but something older and more potent. It's how I saved Mega Bushy Brows so I figured it might heal your arm you know?"
"...If this is a trap…" Kaguya reached out at accepted his hand, gasping as she felt warmth surge through her body.
Naruto frowned as he watched Kaguya's horn regenerate yet there were no signs of the spare limb regenerating. He tried to force more of his chakra into her, hoping the regenerative properties would take effect shortly.
'Gah… I feel so warm... ' Kaguya felt the heat wash over her, 'It… It feels like it is invading me very core. I feel… so strange… I… wait a minute!' Kaguya reacted angrily to the new sensations. 'Is he trying to arouse me?!' "LEARN YOUR PLACE YOU PERVERTED SERVANT!" She roared before head-butting Naruto in the face.
"What the hell?!" Naruto staggered backwards. "I was trying to heal you!"
"Sure as hell didn't feel like it!" Kaguya took a deep breath to calm herself down. "I see you were able to repair my horn."
"I think all I need is more to channel more chakra to you and I can get your arm to…"
"NO!" Kaguya shook her head furiously. "Never again!"
"But your arm…"
"I would rather I go through life with one arm rather than have you violate my sacred body!"
"Violate your… what are you talking about?"
"When you were forcing your chakra on me!" Kaguya blushed slightly. "A noble lady should not speak of such things!"
"I don't get it?" Naruto frowned as Kaguya refused to say anymore. "Well I guess you got your horns repaired if nothing else."
"...Do not expect thanks." Kaguya remarked. "Such a duty is expected of my servant and you were far too wasteful with the chakra you were using. Still…" she glanced at Naruto. "All in all I suppose you performed… adequately."
"Thanks," Naruto smiled.
"For a servant with absolutely no redeeming qualities or skills anyway."
"...Thanks," Naruto repeated in a deadpan.
"You are welcome servant." Kaguya gestured with her hand. "Now return to your duties."
"Yeah, yeah," Naruto grumbled. "For what it's worth all the stone work seems in pretty good shape. There's also a lot of electronics in there that seem alright but I wouldn't use them until someone else has had a look at them. There are bits that I haven't seen before and I have no idea what they do." He frowned. "All the wooden parts are rotten so I'm just replacing them."
"And my room?"
"...I can't say it is fit for a princess but I'll try my best to make it livable."
"I suppose that is all I can expect from you."
"Yeah, yeah," Naruto sighed as he returned to his work.
Kaguya frowned as she watched Naruto get back to work. She didn't understand him one bit. Back before she was a Goddess everyone was polite to her and bowed their heads in her presence. After she became a Goddess everyone worshipped her as the herald of peace. She was a peaceful Goddess, protecting her people from the horrors of war.
At least that was how it started out but she soon realized that humans would always fight amongst each other. They were like children and she had to be stern to keep them safe but this overbearing attitude of hers only bred resentment and fear. Her own sons used the chakra she had given them against her and when she had tried to reclaim her chakra so that they couldn't hurt anyone, they had sealed her away. Her children betrayed her and for what? Thousands of years of war and suffering. Millions dying in pointless little wars that would never have even happened if not for those foolish children of hers.
She was shaken out of her brooding by something soft nuzzling against her leg. She looked to see a small white bunny rabbit.
"Shoo," Kaguya gestured with her hand and the bunny hopped away, only to return with two more bunnies, who all started to rub against the seated Goddess and settle down. "I said shoo!" She repeated and once again the bunnies fled. "This world is full of strange creatures," She mumbled before returning her attention to Naruto, who was apparently arguing with his clones. "And there is the strangest of them all." She remarked before she got the feeling she was being watched. Turning around she saw 12 bunnies sat a respectful distance behind her, all lined up.
"Do as you will," She sighed and the bunnies started to play around her, with a couple falling to sleep, leaning against her. "How strange," She smiled slightly as she stroked the soft fur of the rabbits.
"Rabbit Goddess indeed," Naruto chuckled as he approached, the rabbits quickly scattering as he got near.
"Unlike someone I could mention, they respect royalty." She stood up. "The house?"
"Is finished, mostly." Naruto escorted Kaguya to the large house. What was once a rusted old farmhouse was now looking like a nice country retreat. Not quite up to Kaguya's high standards as a former Goddess/Princess but it would do for now. She made a mental note to get Naruto to learn how to build better buildings. If she was going to be stranded in this dimension she might as well get comfortable here.
"I must admit; this is actually respectable work. I was right to make you my servant." Kaguya declared as they entered the house.
"As you can see it is a little barebones right now. The lights don't all work but I'm not an electrician so I'm not touching them." Naruto remarked.
"...Yeah," Naruto walked over to a switch and flicked it, turning the light on.
"Stop wasting chakra you insufferable servant!"
"It isn't chakra it's electricity," Naruto pointed out. "Didn't you have electricity way back when before you were sealed the first time?"
"It is not my duty to understand how things work, that is your duty," Kaguya tried to cover for herself.
"Right…" Naruto smirked, "Anyway we have a bathroom," Naruto walked over to a room. "Complete with a shower and a large bathtub!"
"...This is a bath?"
"But… It is so small?"
"Small?" Naruto glanced at the room. "This is bigger than my old apartment."
"But where are the fountains? My old bath was practically a swimming pool with fountains and a hot waterfall. It was so cozy and warm."
"Well we don't have an indoor bath like that." He gestured to the bathtub. "Heck I don't even know if we have hot water. The boiler wouldn't turn on so I guess I need to get in touch with Ms. Smith somehow but I couldn't find any messenger pigeons to get in contact with her." Naruto paused seeing Kaguya's blank expression, "The boiler is what you use to heat water using electricity."
"I believe my bath was powered by a fire underneath a giant metal container with water in it," Kaguya remarked.
"I could use chakra to heat up a bath should you want one." Naruto offered. "It would be quicker than lighting a fire."
"I see," Kaguya frowned. "I shall consider it."
"And here is your room," Naruto opened it to reveal several clones still tidying it up. "Not much but I guess you will find a way to decorate it. You've got the biggest bed in the place and the softest mattress."
"This shall do for the time being," Kaguya sat down on her bed. "You are dismissed."
"Begone servant! I am tired."
"Oh… Right," Naruto jerked his head and the clones filed out.
"Ungrateful bunny hag," One of them muttered but Kaguya pretended not to hear it.
"Then… I guess I'll see you in the morning."
"I shall expect my breakfast fully prepared." Kaguya stated.
"How will I do that? I don't know what you like and we have next to no food here!"
"That is a servant's concern."
Naruto opened his mouth to argue before just sighing and leaving.
Once she was sure that Naruto had gone, she covered herself in the blankets and curled up, her lone arm wrapped around her knees. Less than a day ago, she was an all-powerful goddess. Now she was weak, alone and in an unfamiliar environment. She had no allies, only an enemy that didn't want to kill her and soon she would be surrounded by monsters from what the Sunglasses wearing woman had said. As she hugged her knees tighter, Kaguya realized for the first time as long as she could remember, she was afraid.
She paused as she felt something nudging her hand and glanced to see a pure white bunny looking up at her.
"Heh," She laughed weakly. "What a strange place this is." She laid in the bed, which was admittedly comfortable, and tried to fall to sleep, the small rabbit snuggling against her and falling to sleep quickly but for Kaguya, sleep did not come easily.
Middle of the Night
Kaguya's eye suddenly shot open. She remembered fighting… That's right she was about to complete her plan and finally save her world when she was thwarted. She sat up, dislodging several bunnies that had crept into her room who then proceeded to gather around her, as if waiting for her to do something.
"I shall have to inform that useless servant of mine that he did a poor job of securing my room." Kaguya rubbed the sleep from her eyes before leaving the bed and opening her curtains, the moon was shining in through the window, the pale light reflecting off of her equally pale skin giving her a look of almost ethereal beauty. Unfortunately for Kaguya's bruised ego, no one was here to witness her hauntingly beautiful appearance except the bunnies and they seemed to have little to no awareness of her mood, nor the ability to compliment her even if they could. In fact, all they had done was climb into the slightly crevice where she had been sleeping and fall to sleep themselves.
Kaguya briefly contemplated kicking them out of her bed but decided there was no real point. Just because she was having difficulty sleeping, didn't mean that she had to cause misery to the bunny rabbits. She briefly thought about waking up her servant but decided that he had earned his sleep.
As she was staring out of her window she noticed some movement in one of the barns. She subconsciously went to use her Byakugan before realizing that without her chakra there was little she could actually do. Once again she felt powerless. She had no idea what was going on in that barn. What if it was one of the local monster girls that Sunglasses had been talking about? Here she was with one arm and no powers. Still, they were in a barn that was some distance away. It could wait until the morning, Kaguya decided before climbing back into her bed.
The very instant she shut her eyes she heard a creaking noise downstairs, and that sent a shiver through her entire body. Even the rabbits seemed to be huddling together in fright. She lay perfectly still as the sound of footsteps grew louder as if someone was walking towards her room. She held her breath as the footsteps stopped outside her room, before resuming their journey back downstairs.
What was once fear gave way to anger. She was a (former) goddess and here she was cowering like some sort of… of bunny rabbit! She thought venomously glaring at the fluffy balls that were trying to hide themselves inside her Kimono. Her anger gave her strength and she crept over to the door, slowly pushing it open.
'Credit where it is due, this door opened rather quietly.' Kaguya thought to herself. 'Maybe the servant isn't completely talentless.'
She softly walked amongst the fresh wooden floors, delicately stepping towards the kitchen area where she saw a shadowy figure rooting through the drawers. Grabbing a wooden rolling pin from the side, she crept towards the mysterious figure and swung with all her strength.
The figure span around and grabbed her arm with little effort.
"Oh no…" Kaguya realized she was in trouble until she felt a ruffling in her kimono sleeve and a small bunny dived at the assailant, taking him by surprise and biting him on the nose.
"Son of a bitch!" A familiar voice cried out.
"Servant?" Kaguya felt an overwhelming sense of relief, followed by a warm sensation as the bunny leapt back into her sleeve.
"Still holding a grudge eh?" Naruto mumbled as he rubbed his nose.
"I… What are you doing up at this time?!" Kaguya rallied. "I thought you were a burglar!"
"Burglar? Here to steal what exactly," Naruto summoned his golden cloak, illuminating the entire room.
"W-well... "Kaguya faltered. "That's not the issue! Stop wasting my chakra! You said there were electric lights here correct?!"
"The bulbs don't work and I couldn't find any spare." Naruto admitted sheepishly. "As for why I am up right now, I was seeing what I could make for breakfast. I couldn't sleep," He massaged his neck. "The sofa isn't very comfortable."
"Well you've got the only bed and I haven't even started on fixing my room."
"W-what?" Kaguya blinked.
"Well you wanted to go to sleep so I figured I'd work on my room tomorrow." Naruto replied.
"Oh," Kaguya felt the tiniest smidgen of respect for Naruto. "Putting your master first. Maybe you do have some talent as a servant after all."
"Thanks?" Naruto wasn't sure how to take it but given Kaguya's abrasive attitude thus far, he chose to take it as a compliment.
"So what will be for breakfast." Kaguya sat down at a counter before she noticed Naruto's questioning look. "I can't sleep."
"You couldn't sleep either?" Naruto chuckled. "This place will take some getting used to that's for sure. It's a lot bigger than my old place. Doesn't feel like a home either. But then again it's only until we find a way back."
"I… When I was royalty I always had someone to look after me, to ensure my bed was perfect and that nothing would interrupt my sleep. When I became a Goddess I didn't need to sleep. Now I find myself needing it again but… I do not feel safe here."
"I'm sure you will eventually," Naruto smiled. "It's just a matter of getting used to it."
"As you say," Kaguya sighed deeply. "So…" She steered the conversation back to the original topic, "What is there to eat?"
"Well…" Naruto put a small bag on the counter. "Fortunately Ms. Smith left us some things." He pulled out an old flip phone. "Not sure what this is." He remarked as he put it on the desk. "Instant ramen!" Naruto's face lit up as he pulled out several containers. "Well that's me sorted. What else do we have?" He pulled out a bag and let out a snort of laughter.
"What is it?" Kaguya narrowed her eyes.
"For you," Naruto grinned as he handed her several carrots.
"I feel Sunglasses and I are going to have to have some words," Kaguya remarked before taking one of the carrots and taking an angry bite of it.
"What… You are actually going to eat that?"
"Better this than… whatever that instant ramen stuff is." Kaguya narrowed her eyes. "It doesn't look appetizing."
"That's just the container," Naruto smirked. "The ramen is inside."
"I knew that!" Kaguya lied.
"Uh-huh," Naruto chuckled.
"What were you doing in the nearest barn then?"
"I saw something in there." Kaguya took another angry bite of the carrot.
"I… I haven't left this house." Naruto remarked.
"... Oh…" Kaguya felt nervous. "Don't you think you should investigate?"
"Well… What am I going to do?" Kaguya remarked. "If I had my powers I would deal with it myself but someone just happened to have sealed those away."
"Oh right, sorry." Naruto paused, "Well not sorry for sealing your powers. You deserved that." He started to leave before he got an idea and grinned evilly. "So I'll leave you here then. All alone. Powerless. I mean I'm sure whatever was in the barn is still in there. Unless I attracted them to this building with my chakra but I'm sure that didn't happen." He dispelled his cloak and walked out of the kitchen.
Kaguya sat there, angrily staring at the remaining half of a carrot, a bunny perched on her arm and looking at her, twitching its nose.
"I know he just said that to scare me into going with him." Kaguya told the bunny. "It isn't going to work. I am perfectly safe here right?"
The bunny jumped from her hand.
"I mean… Why would anyone want to break in here? It isn't as if anyone who might have a grudge against me is in this dimension as well right? I mean… Indra's inheritor isn't here… right? He was kicked away from the portal by the servant…. Right?"
There was a loud creak and the rabbit goddess raced out of the house towards Naruto, leaving behind the carrot and the rabbit who simply hopped over to the vegetable and started to nibble happily.
Naruto frowned as he looked at the barn. He had seen movement but with the only source of light currently hidden behind some clouds, he wasn't able to see what was in there. As he got closer her could hear a strange noise, several light thuds as if something with more than four legs was running and jumping around. He might even say something was scurrying around.
"What is it?" Kaguya asked directly in Naruto's ear, nearly giving him a heart attack.
"Don't know…" Naruto swallowed. "But be quiet please. I want to catch them unawares."
Kaguya scowled at him for basically telling her to shut up, but otherwise followed his request. The two creeped up to the barn's entrance before noting the scurrying had stopped. Naruto squinted into the darkness.
"!" Naruto furiously mimed being quiet before creeping inside the hut and activating his golden aura, to reveal an empty barn.
"There's nothing here," Kaguya remarked.
"Well maybe somebody scared it off by talking," Naruto replied irritably as he looked up at the ceiling for any exits it might have used, although the roof was more hole than ceiling which provided plenty of possible escape routes.
"Well maybe it was someone lighting up like a flare that scared them off!" Kaguya retorted angrily. "Using my chakra as some sort of cheap light source!"
"Well maybe... it is right behind you!" Naruto finished quietly as he spun around to yell at Kaguya.
As if on the world's slowest turntable, Kaguya turned around. Illuminated by Naruto's golden glow, a woman stood behind her. She had shoulder length blonde hair and a rather impressive bust. She was wearing a plain white shirt that covered her arms and a black dress that started just below her waist that covered… far more legs than what Kaguya was expecting to see. Below her waist she was a spider with long, thin, brown limbs with darker brown stripes. Her hands were of a similar color and the fingers looked vaguely claw-like. Six red glittering eyes seemed to focus on her.
The three stood in silence for some time, Naruto's shock rapidly fading whilst Kaguya remained still, hoping the strange woman was not aggressive.
"So," Naruto rubbed the back of his head. "Are you… er… Can you speak."
"Yes." The new arrival bowed her head slightly. Despite her appearance, her voice sounded just like a normal woman and Naruto felt himself calm down at the ability to converse with her.
"Er… Why didn't you?" Naruto asked.
"Species Cultural Exchange Bill, Article 31-A, Sub-Section 4. All Diplomatic Representatives are to follow the orders of their handlers and any relevant government officials unless said order contradicts a principal law." She quoted. "I was requested by Agent Smith to stay put until my representative was sent to meet me at this location."
"Agent… Wait Sunglasses sent you here?" Kaguya found her voice.
"Sunglasses?" The spider girl frowned. "Article 21-D, Sub-Section 1. All human agents and handlers should be treated with the respect that any diplomatic representative deserves."
"I care little for your treaties," Kaguya scowled. "I am of noble blood."
"Don't mind her, she's just grumpy because she didn't get much sleep." Naruto laughed weakly and stepped between the two girls. "So… Did Ms. Smith tell you who your representative is?"
"Indeed," The spider produced some paperwork and handed it to Naruto, who decided it best not to question where she produced it from.
"Let me see here… Hmm…" Naruto scowled. 'It seems to be written in a language I understand, at least in parts. I have no idea what I am looking at. Wait… That's my name!' "Oh this is me!" Naruto repeated aloud. "I am Naruto Uzumaki! Pleased to meet you."
"I thank you for giving me this chance." The Spider-girl shook his hand. Her hands felt weird to Naruto, but not in a bad way, just in a different way.
"Chance?" Naruto blinked.
"Indeed. I was initially rejected for the Species Exchange program. Agent Smith worked very hard to change that."
"Why were you rejected initially? If it's not a personal question."
"Article 21-E, sub-section 3- a diplomatic representative is required to answer all questions asked by a handler or agent unless answering could infringe on any of the principal laws as detailed in Article 1. If you wish for me to answer I am obligated to do so."
"If you don't want to you don't have to," Naruto chuckled.
"It is nothing personal," The spider-woman shook her head. "It was decided that my hunting instincts would make living in a city environment difficult."
"Hunting instincts?" Kaguya frowned.
"Indeed, I am a Long Leg-type Arachne and we are carnivorous with a very strong innate hunting instinct. It is believed that in a city environment my instincts may lead to me hunting humans. Which would be in violation of Article 1-A Principal Law 3- a diplomatic representative should pose no danger to the public before being allowed on the program."
"You sure know a lot of laws," Naruto laughed weakly.
"I need to."
"Oh where are my manners," Naruto blinked, "I just realized I never asked your name."
The Spider-woman took a deep sigh, "Chichi. My name is Chichi."
"What a vulgar name," Kaguya remarked bluntly.
"Eh?" Naruto blinked clueless. "Isn't that a way of saying dad or something?"
"It can also mean breasts," Chichi admitted. "I assure you I have heard every joke imaginable about it."
"Oh fair enough," Naruto shrugged. "Nice to meet you Chichi. I'm Naruto."
"Such a vulgar woman, speaking freely of such… topics," Kaguya snorted. "Be grateful that I, Kaguya Otsutsuki: Empress of the Moon and the Rabbit Goddess, tolerate your presence."
"Pardon?" Chichi blinked.
"You'll get used to her." Naruto laughed weakly. "So… Er…" He looked at Kaguya then back to Chichi. "What… er... exactly do I have to do?"
"What is my job as your handler?"
"I…" Chichi blinked. "Do you not know?"
"Er… Not really," Naruto rubbed the back of his head sheepishly.
"But that is in contrast with Article 1-A Sub-Section 2- All Handlers must be declared competent before being assigned to the program." Chichi frowned.
"Hey I'm plenty competent!" Naruto countered. "I was given this job for a reason."
"Even so," Chichi seemed unimpressed. "I have been waiting here for several hours… I believe that you may not be qualified to for this role. I apologise if this offends you, which would be in violation of Article…"
"Yeah, yeah I get it," Naruto cut her off. "You like your rules. Tell you what? Why don't you come inside and sleep it over? I'll figure out a way to get ahold of Ms. Smith in the morning."
"...Very well." Chichi bowed her head. "As you are currently my handler it is my obligation to comply with any requests you make, within reason."
"Where will she sleep?" Kaguya frowned.
"Oh I had a few clones hanging back at the house who were creating a few spare bedrooms anyway." Naruto grinned at her.
"W-what are you smirking at?"
"Nothing," Naruto chuckled. "One of my clones just dispelled. Apparently you were talking to a bunny but when he stepped into the room the floor board creaked and you were out of there. It was almost as if you knew the Hiraishin technique."
"I know not of what you speak," Kaguya narrowed her eyes. "But I'm sure this technique is as unimpressive as anything else you have done, such as those crude chakra hands you make."
"Crude?!" Naruto crossed his arms as they walked back to the house, Chichi following up the rear. "They have opposable thumbs and everything!"
"My chakra limb was completely indistinguishable from a real limb." Kaguya smirked patronizingly. "But I'm sure for one of your breeding, that was a good attempt." She patted him on the head.
Naruto glared at her back.
"It appears that your other charge doesn't respect you," Chichi noted.
"About half a day ago we were trying to kill each other." Naruto shrugged.
"...I don't know where to start with how many rules that breaks."
"Oh don't worry. I'm 25% sure she's forgiven me. I mean I only cost her arm, her powers and possibly stranded her in a foreign world." Naruto smiled at Chichi who wasn't entirely what to say back.
"Why do you put up with her?" Chichi asked. "I mean, Article 21-A says…"
"Let me tell you about some rules I live by," Naruto stopped to look at her. "I call them my Nindo or my ninja way. I will never give up, so long as I can breathe I can fight, so long as one person needs me… I will never give up on them. Even if they have gone a little of the rails," He mumbled the last bit, thinking of Sasuke.
"So even though she doesn't respect you, you won't give up on her?"
"Oh Kaguya?" Naruto laughed weakly. "Well… I guess I kind of feel somewhat responsible for her current predicament. Plus, I don't think she is genuinely a bad person. She's just had a bad day."
Chichi wasn't so sure but chose not to comment. In the morning she would see Agent Smith and would voice her concerns. She was sure that Agent Smith would be understanding.
The Next Morning
"Rejected," Ms. Smith smiled as she nursed a freshly brewed coffee. She had shown up early with some supplies for the farmhouse as well as some experts to repair the bits that Naruto didn't know how to. He had saved her an impressive amount of labor, which was always a good thing as she was expecting the house to be in a pretty bad state when she arrived. She was currently enjoying a full breakfast as prepared by Naruto whilst sipping a coffee (also freshly brewed by Naruto). Chichi stood before her looking like a deer caught in the headlights.
"B-But…" Chichi took a deep breath. "The Interspecies Exchange Bill, Article 1-A Sub-Section 2 clearly states All Handlers must be declared competent before being assigned to the program."
"Aren't you forgetting a little bit at the end?" Smith smiled.
"W-well," Chichi frowned. "It says competency is decided by the Local Cultural Exchange Coordinator."
"And who am I?" Ms. Smith finished her coffee, "Refill please."
"Seriously? When did I become everyone's servant?" Naruto grumbled as he took her cup and refilled it.
"Yesterday when you decided to prevent the world achieving peace and dragged me kicking and screaming into this… world." Kaguya paused in her meal to toss a carrot slice from her salad to a sad looking bunny.
"The Local Cultural Exchange Coordinator." Chichi frowned.
"Listen," Smith paused to take her cup back from Naruto, "I know he might not look like much, sound like much or even smell like much."
"I am spitting in your next coffee." Naruto warned.
"Do not disgrace my name by being such an inferior servant!" Kaguya warned.
"But," Smith continued. "He has potential. That's why I decided to send you to him. It's just a shame there aren't more like him. There are so many girls who need a handler like Naruto-kun here."
"Flattery won't get you anywhere," Naruto grumbled. "So why are you here?"
"Oh just seeing how things are going."
"And eating the food you had brought for us." Naruto deadpanned.
"Well if someone offers me food it would be rude not to accept." Ms. Smith laughed. "On that note... "She waved the empty cup at him.
"Seriously." Naruto summoned a Kage Bunshin.
"Stop wasting my chakra!"
"Huh…" Ms. Smith blinked as she saw the Kage Bunshin take her cup and fill it up. "Say… Those are solid clones, right?"
"Yeah," Naruto nodded.
"How many… How many can you make?"
"Thousands?" Naruto shrugged.
"Hehehehehehehe…" Ms. Smith started chuckling darkly.
"I have a feeling that you shouldn't have told her that." Kaguya sighed.
'I never thought I would say this but I agree with the bunny. She already knows your weaknesses and now you are telling her your strengths?'
'I'm sure you're over-exaggerating.' Naruto glanced at Ms. Smith. 'At least… I really hope you are.'
Later that Day
Kuroko Smith was practically dancing as she entered her office. Even the sub-par coffee she had gotten from the office couldn't ruin her mood. As she approached her desk, the usual intimidating pile of representatives in need of a new host stood waiting, but she had a secret weapon now. Flicking through the files, she selected the most dangerous and dropped them all into box and rummaging through her desk, pulled out a black marker and scribbled 'NARUTO' on front of it, before putting the box to one side.
"Well that was a productive day's work." She sighed happily. "I think it's almost dinner time… Maybe I should check in with Naruto to see if Chichi is still being troublesome." She smiled as she left her desk. "And if they happen to be having their dinner and offer me a bit of the meal, well it would be rude to turn it down, now wouldn't it?"
...and that's the end of the first chapter!
I guess I should get this next part out of the way before anyone asks. The girls assigned to Kimihito will not be in Naruto's harem or even assigned to him. They may appear later if Naruto ever ends up interacting with Kimihito, but it would likely just be for a brief encounter and interaction. Ms Smith is a definite no as well. Nothing personal, but I just don't like the idea of her as a romantic interest in general. The harem will consist of minor characters (this include MON as a possibility) and OC's based on various subspecies from the end cards shown in each episode of the anime. This not going to change.
I've always had a thing for minor characters and characters with little to no backstory and underdeveloped personalities, especially when it comes to fanfiction. I feel the less an author has to work with, the more creative they have to be to compensate for it, and in turn the story becomes more unique and often better.
Now to address a few of things I know someone's going to ask. First off, "Why is it Naruto's birthday when he arrives?" Because we know it was his 17th birthday the day he fought Kaguya, so if he had ended up in a different dimension and the day was different, his age and birthday wouldn't line up. Second, "Why didn't Kaguya's body get sealed?" It'll be explained later down the road, so just wait. Third, "If Hagoromo able to undo the Infinite Tsukuyomi, why did he wait so long to do it?" He couldn't manifest himself in the world of the living until Madara's lower half was cut off and he wanted Naruto and Sasuke to do it to see if they could end the brothers feud. Finally, "What happened to Madara?" Again, it'll be explained down the road, so just wait.
See ya next time!