Yo! So here's an idea I came up with like, half an hour ago, because washing dishes is boring. Anyway, don't take things too seriously, I'm mainly writing this for fun, though there will indeed be darker things mentioned. Cross-posted to AO3.

Warnings: Mentions of abuse-nothing detailed, hopefully. Probably character bashing in the forms of AD for sure, and maybe certain Weasleys such as AW, MW, PW, RW, GW. All possible, nothing certain just yet. This has also basically turned out to be a crack treated seriously fic. Don't say I didn't warn you.

Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter or any of its characters...

Voldemort was seated in his study at Riddle Manor, his current place of stay. He was going over some of his plans for the future, when a snowy white owl suddenly flew in through the open window to his right and landed on his desk, right in front of him and on top of various sheets of parchment-

"The ink is still wet, you damned bird!"

The owl ignored his angry words and merely stared at him. Clasped in the owl's beak was a letter, which quickly caught his attention, though it didn't do anything to calm his irritation.

Voldemort stared. The owl stared right back with just as much intensity. How...disconcerting.

He automatically pulled out his wand and checked the letter for any hexes, curses, jinxes, or traps-as any good Dark Lord should. And then, when he was positive everything was safe and clear, he took the note from the owl.

Having expected the bird to fly off immediately, as most tended to do around him, he was honestly quite surprised when it remained where it was, continuing to stare at him. Perhaps a prompt response was required, then. Since the owl couldn't answer him, he unfolded the letter. It was very short, barely three sentences long. Still, he began to read...

'Voldemort,

I'm bored. It's your fault. Entertain me.

Harry Potter'

A strange, jerky twitch ran through the Dark Lord's body. "That boy has a death wish," he said to himself in a growl. And to his surprise, the owl before him hooted in what, oddly enough, sounded like agreement. "Tch, bold brat."

That's it for now. Most chapters will be pretty short. Looking forward to reviews! Laterz!