a/n: Hey guys ready for a new ride? So this story is loosely based on one of my fav books Count to Ten by Karen Rose but I made my own version of it -So first of all peeps this story has a M rating for a reason…this fic isn't fluffy or sweet (yes there will fluffy moments too)but rather dark. It will deal with topics like murder, rape, child and drug abuse, violence and if that triggers you I ask you to please stay away from this story. There will be trigger warnings on every chapter.

Thank you Abi for taking again a look at it and staying with me. Thanks also to Ayla for making the cover for this fic! Love both of you!

So this is only a taste of the fic to see if you guys like it. Chapters will become considerably longer later.

As usual I don't own anything and I'm responsible for all mistakes made.

Regina is staring at the door in front of her trying to will herself to make the next step. The door which leads to the 13th precinct of the Chicago homicide department. To walk through this door walk up to her desk like she had done every fucking day for the last 11 years, but her feet won't obey her. So she stands there. Big rain drops fall and wet her thoroughly, but she still doesn't move.

It's stupid- completely ridiculous! She is a homicide detective for heaven's sake; she doesn't fear anything. She has solved more cases than most- has found her way out of the most dangerous situations. She isn't afraid to open a simple door and start her work day, she isn't!

But she is. Regina is terrified; terrified because she failed- failed once again. Only this time her failure didn't cost her partners life. Not this time, but it was a close call. If the bullet had hit David only one inch further to the left she would've lost another partner and it would've been her fault. Again.

But David lives; that much Regina knows from calling the hospital, feeling too guilty to visit herself. She knows he will be angry with her for not showing up- especially since he isn't the only one who got into close contact with a bullet. Her right side still aches; the scar a reminder of her own incompetence.

Regina has spent the last two weeks at home on strict orders from her doctor. Regina hated it, her only saving grace was that she could spend more time with Henry. Henry is almost ten years old now. He is Regina's whole world, and was almost an orphan all because Regina couldn't keep it together.

Stupid, so damn stupid!

Regina shakes her head and reaches for the door handle again, knowing that she can't stay here forever- she has a case to get to. Not to mention that she is soaking wet; her coat and hat not providing much protection from the harsh rain

"Get it together, Mills. What's done is done. Do better next time," Regina mutters, taking a deep breath when a soft voice startled her.

"Hello Miss, are you alright?" Regina turns around only to get caught in deep blue eyes. Certain eyes belong to an attractive man who now studies her with concern. Regina is lost for words for a moment, and merely stares at the man in front of her.

"You know, if you need a place to stay there is a homeless shelter just around the corner. I can take you there?" He has a British accent- something Regina has always had a weakness for. It takes a moment for her to realize what the meaning of his words actually are. He thinks she is a homeless person. Well… she can't blame him- with her dark coat and hat drenched in water she might actually look lost.

Regina is so taken aback by the whole situation that even her usually sharp tongue can't help her out. The man simply smiles softly at her and hands over his umbrella which Regina- still confused by all this- takes.

"Here, so you can at least stay dry. Please stay safe," and with those words he gently squeezes her shoulder and goes through the door she has been standing in front for a small eternity.

Regina stays there, the umbrella in her hand, staring after the hot British guy till what just happened sinks in. She has to laugh, really laugh, and it does the job. It rips her out of her self-loathing, and she finally opens the door to follow the man. Regina walks up the stairs to her workplace (she never takes the elevator- she has to stay in shape, after all) turns left twice and then she is there. She takes one last deep breath and walks to her desk

"Look who the cat dragged in! Nice of you to show your pretty face around her again, Mills," Detective Emma Swan- one of Regina's long term colleagues and friend welcomes her with a grin. There aren't many woman in the homicide department, so they had stuck together from day one. Emma is a good cop; smart and clever, but with a big mouth which often gets her in trouble. Something Regina can relate too.

"Well Swan, I'm surprised that you didn't turn this place upside down while I was gone. I feared the worst," Regina replies with a smirk, slowly feeling like herself again.
"Oh look who's back! The Queen herself!" Neal Cassidy- Emma's partner- called from the break room where he was standing chewing on a carrot.

"Hey, Cassidy. Trying to quit smoking again?" Regina asks, noticing the vegetable in Neal's mouth. He has been trying to quit for years, and carrots seem to be his new way.

"Yeah, but it's a bitch. And I hate carrots," the other detective answers. "But seriously- it's good to have you back. How's the little man?"

"Henry is fine, thanks for asking. And, I bet it is. I'm still amazed you two children didn't hurt yourself," Regina mumbles, at the same time checking out if everything on her desk was where it was supposed to be. She takes off her coat and hat and straightens her dark pants and blazer and makes sure the buttons of her red blouse are closed enough to not show too much of her cleavage. This is work, after all.

"Charming. I think I take it back," Neal says throwing a plastic cup after Regina who catches it while giving her colleague one of her best evil glares.
"Stop throwing things, Cassidy," she turns to Emma "Is Gold in?"

"Yes, the Captain is in, but with some dude. I think it's about our- well your- new case. It's a really bad one Regina," Emma answers, swallowing hard. Regina takes another deep breath. Emma- well, all of them- are used to pretty gruesome cases and if an experienced Detective like Emma says it's bad, it's bad. Just what Regina needs on her first day back!

"Regina wait," Emma calls after her "How's David? How are you?" Regina stops dead but when she turns around her face is emotionless. One of the few good things her mother taught her.
"You'll have to ask him that yourself, Swan. And I'm fine," with that Regina walks straight to the Captain's office, not daring to look around, knowing what she will see in her teams eyes; concern- pity, and she can't deal with all that now.

Can't think about the shooting that almost cost David's life and hers too. Can't think about how she was too distracted to see the drug dealer take out his gun. She should've seen it- she was trained to see it. But it doesn't matter; all that matters now is her new case (and that neither David's child nor hers lost a parent).

So Regina opens the door, ready to report for duty and ready to tell her boss that whoever is in there with him to help her can shove off. Whatever the case is about, she can handle it.

Then Regina stops dead again.

Because the man standing next to her boss is him. The man who gave her his umbrella is standing in the Captain's office in a very nice suit with that same damn soft smile, looking at her in confusion. Well, he isn't the only one.

"Ah Regina! Perfect timing. Lieutenant Locksley, this is Detective Mills. She will be the lead Detective on this case. Regina, dearie, this is Fire Marshall Robin Locksley. He will assist you on this case."

Regina just stares; she can't believe what she is seeing. "You?" She whispers, shaking her head.

"Well hello again, Detective. Nice to officially meet you," Robin says, studying her thoughtfully. Regina doesn't like his gaze on her, it feels like he is seeing straight through her- not to mention that she is embarrassed like hell.

Damnit, of all the people in the world he had to be the one catching her day-dreaming. He thought she was a homeless person for heaven's sake. 'Great first impression, Mills, just great' Regina thinks.

She puts on a smile and straightens her spine, looking as professional as she can as she extends her hand to shake his. "Nice to meet you, Lieutenant." He keeps his gaze on her for a moment longer and then shakes her hand.

"But I don't think your assistance will be needed. I can handle it," Regina says sharply, and her smile doesn't reach her eyes. She won't be working with a new partner- she won't. "Despite Gold I already have a partner, I don't need a new one."

"Detective, this is not up for debate. David will be out for quite some time and you need somebody with Mr. Locksley's knowledge for the case. Lieutenant, would you give me and Miss Mills a few seconds alone?" Gold asks, and with last glance Robin leaves them.

"Gold I…" Regina starts but Gold interrupts her. "Be quiet, Regina. You are my best Detective and god knows this case needs it but you still work for me, and if I say jump you say how high are we clear Detective?"

Regina knows to pick her battles, so she nods and sits down on the chair Gold has pulled out for her and asks "So what is this case about?"

"It's a bad one, Regina," Gold starts and Regina sighs.

It was gonna be a long day.