AN: Just a note to be clear regarding this chapter; you are special with everything you have and you are important. No matter what, be proud of who you are.
I don't intend to be rude or disregard anyone.
-I EDITED THE CHAPTERS 16 and 17- I highly recommend reading them again.
"I think it's time I see another specialist. I want to try a new point of view." Haru stated confidently. He decided to just bring the subject and finally blurted it out as soon as they finished dinner.
Slowly lifting his gaze from the papers he was checking, Sirius stared at him. "Are you completely sure you want to do this?"
Nodding to himself, he tightened his hands on his lap trying to hide how nervous he was. "Yes. I want to and I won't lose anything by trying."
"Alright." Sirius nodded and then he asked. "Why so sudden? Is it because of him?"
"No." Haru replied instantly without thinking but a second later he let out a defeated sigh, "Maybe. A little." He frowned, looking down at his hands before he shook his head. "But what's most important is that I'm tired of being in this chair. I want to walk again without fearing that I will fall if I try to take a few steps."
"It could take time and many studies, you know that."
Haru nodded. "I know. I've been thinking about this for a long time. I won't change my mind."
"If the treatment is done correctly, you will be able to walk without aid. No more wheelchairs, but most importantly, no more pain." The doctor stated looking at them both. "Nonetheless, the process is slow and painful I'm not going to lie." The doctor paused, letting it sink in. "You might feel exhausted for the next few weeks."
Haru nodded, he knew it was going to be painful but being able to walk freely was worth the pain. "Will I be able to attend school?"
"You are completely sure that this is what you want?" Sirius asked.
"Yes, Sirius. We talked about it."
"I just want you to be sure before you do this."
"It would be best if we start the procedure right away but with your education on the line, I'm thinking of starting at the beginning of summer break." The doctor said. "That way you'll be able to rest and focus solely on this, without adding more stress to the matter."
"I'll do it."
Summer break came soon enough and, as he expected, it was full of hospital visits and meds.
The exercises were extensive and followed by an excruciating pain that could only be numbed with pills that made him dizzy and drowsy, but even so the pain lingered still.
A week has passed and he still couldn't get over the pain. His back would hurt horribly and his legs would tremble whenever he moved.
He had not told anyone of his visit to the hospital yet, waiting to feel better and see improvements before doing so. So he hid his discomfort and wore a smile every time someone approached him.
Tadashi was the first that noticed the change.
He had been working at the café helping Cass in the rush hour, but from time to time his gaze would trail to the table where Haru was sitting, staring intently with unfocused eyes at the papers he was holding. He could bet that he had been staring at the very same paper for the last hour and the worry was eating out his mind.
Quietly approaching the table, he left Haru's teacup on the table and laid a gentle hand on the back of his neck. "Are you okay?" He asked worriedly, leaning forward to get a good look at his face. His concern increased when he received slow blinking eyes in response. "You seem exhausted."
"I am." Haru conceded, stretching a little with an exhale. "Everything is fine, I'm just tired."
"Tired?" He echoed. "You look like you'll drop dead at any second."
Haru couldn't help the giggle that escaped him at his bluntness. "You are such a charmer."
Tadashi let out a snort, running a hand across Haru's hair. "Seriously, you should rest."
Letting out a sigh, Haru pressed his head harder against the hand, closing his eyes.
The bustle around the café seemed to increase each second, he already felt the upcoming headache.
"It's supposed to be vacations but we barely see each other for more than a few seconds. I felt like I've been neglecting you."
"Neglect-" Tadashi mouthed, completely stunned that Haru got that idea. Grasping both of his hands, he took a seat next to him. "You are the one that send texts every morning and every night," he continued when Haru opened his mouth about to protest. "The one who calls at least a week to ask how is everyone, the one who came to see me at work when looking so exhausted that it makes me worry that you are neglecting your health because of me."
"C'mon, let me take you home." Tadashi said, starting to untie his apron and went to the kitchen at the back.
"But I'm okay."
"Yeah, coz you seem to be doing great right now."
Haru protested with a frown that in Tadashi's mind made him look cuter. "You are working and I don't want to bother."
"I already talked with Cass; she doesn't have any problems with me leaving ten minutes before the end of my shift."
Just then, the commotion increased until the point of being unbearable for him. His head felt as if it was splitting in two and there was a ringing on his ears, numbing his senses until he couldn't think straight.
Placing a hand against his head, he tried to get a hold over his rising temper, but with all the stress that he accumulated the past two weeks with every hospital visit, the pain resulting from his exercises, the insomnia caused by that same pain, the diet and pills to strengthen his bones and the resulting nausea and drowsiness. Every single thing that should help him feel better just seemed to aggravate him in one way or another.
Needless to say, he finally blew up.
Without thinking, Haru slammed his hands on the table and shouted. "Stop it! I said I'm fine!"
The bustle surrounding the Café quieted instantly except for a few murmurs. Ashamed, he immediately lowered his gaze and stared at his hands.
Faltering, he looked up expecting to see annoyed brown eyes staring down at him, but Tadashi just looked at him, completely calm.
"I-I'm sorry, I didn't mean to yell." Haru mumbled, looking down again, not able to maintain eye contact and tiredly rubbed his eyes. "I just wanted to leave the apartment for a little while. The past weeks have been completely crazy, and you are right," He sighed, dropping his shoulders, defeated. "I'm exhausted and hungry... and cranky." He added a second later, pursing his lips. "Everyone is staring, isn't it?"
"A little," he admitted, "don't pay attention to them."
Haru glanced ruefully at him before he moved away from the table. "I think I should leave."
"Let me take you home. Just to make sure you get there safely."
"I'm really sorry for the outburst."
"Don't worry; I would've been worried if you didn't. You seemed too high-strung, which makes me wonder what's going on." He was – that his boyfriend hadn't confided on him on what was clearly troubling him but it would be wrong to try to push him to tell him. "I'm not going to prod, so don't worry. I want to believe that you'll tell me when you are ready."
He was about to break down and cry at that moment. Now wasn't the time or the place to be crying, he told himself and took a shaky breath. "Do you think I'm going crazy?"
"Um, nope. I think you are completely and unforgivingly exhausted." Tadashi smiled and ran a hand through the locks that managed to get out from his loose ponytail.
"Now, come. Let me take you home."
"He seemed really exhausted. What has he been doing?" Tadashi asked softly from his place next to the door, looking at the dozing form resting on the bed.
"You should ask him. It's not my place; I can't tell you if he doesn't want to."
Tadashi sighed; worriedly looking at Haru's sleeping form.
"Look, I know you care about him and I'm grateful for that. Just give him some time and I'm sure he will tell you eventually." He said, placing a hand on his shoulder. "Right now I think you should say goodbye, but don't make it too long. He needs to rest."
"Yes, thank you, sir."
"Sirius. Just call me Sirius." He said before he left the hall.
"Tadashi," Haru called quietly as he turned to lay on his side. "I'm sorry for yelling. That was wrong of me."
"It doesn't matter, but that doesn't mean that I'm not worried." Tadashi replied taking a seat next to him on the bed. "What made you think that? What got you the idea that you were neglecting me of all the things?"
"I don't know?" He mumbled, avoiding his gaze.
"Haru," Tadashi pressed. "just tell me."
With his eyes closed, he took a deep breath. "I said that, but the truth was that I felt… lonely." He paused trying to arrange his feelings into words. His mind was muddled and it was difficult to find the words to explain himself.
"I was…" He started, picking off lint of his sheets nervously. "I was angry at you." He uttered quickly and went on without looking at him. "A-and then I got angry at myself for thinking that you didn't care and I wanted you there with me, which is stupid because I didn't even tell you I was going to the hospital in the first place." He blurted everything at once, quickly running out of breath.
"Woah, woah. Hospital? Are you sick?" He asked worriedly. "Is everything alright?"
"I'm alright and I wanted to tell you, but then I knew you would get worried but I wanted you to worry because that means that you care. I don't know what to do or think anymore! I think I'm going crazy!"
"Haru, you need to breath." "Will you tell me what was it about?"
"I… I went to see a doctor." Haru started quietly, "I needed- I wanted to ask something." He quickly replied. "Nothing serious, I needed some advice."
"If it was, you would tell me, right?"
Haru quickly nodded with a shaky smile before he crumbled, "Dammit if I don't tell you now, I don't think I ever will!" He exclaimed and Tadashi stared at his outburst.
"I asked for a new therapy."
"What did they say?" He asked after a moment.
"There are some new exercises and then pills I need to take, but if everything is done accordingly there's the chance that- I could walk without aid."
"Is that why you have been so tired lately?" He inquired receiving a nod in reply. "Is it really worth it? I can see you are in pain and I'm certain that that it's what is causing your problems to sleep."
"For me, it is." His boyfriend said softly, "It would mean no more wheelchairs. No more fear of falling before I even make a step. And-" he pause, avoiding his gaze, "I will be able to walk beside you."
Tadashi lowered his gaze, suddenly understanding, "I don't want to see you in pain."
"The pain is not that bad. I-It was, but only on the first few days-"
"But, if this is what you want I guess I should accept it."
Afterwards, they agreed that Haru wouldn't need to have his therapy alone, and that someone should be there just in case the pain and overexertion became unbearable.
Sirius was home early from work, loosening his tie as he walked through the hall, thinking that he should have a well-deserved drink and then a nap when he heard something that made him stop on his tracks.
Curious, he turned towards his son's door wondering what was going on.
"I know, I'm sorry." 'Tadashi is here?' "Just hold on a little and don't move."
'What. The. Hell? What in the world are they doing in there?!' He wanted to barge in and kick Tadashi out of the house for good, Haru's boyfriend be damned, but he regained control and continued listening in.
He heard Haru's gasp from the other side of the door. "I was wrong! I can't do this! You're hurting me!"
Sirius quickly barged the door open, exclaiming, "What the hell is going on?!"
Haru stared at him confused. "Sirius? What?" He asked and Sirius then had to take a moment to take in the scene. There on the ground, his son was laying on his back with one of his legs was bending on the air with Tadashi's helpful grip on the back of knee and the sole of his foot.
"You are early." Haru said casually.
Tadashi stared at him and then at his boyfriend, then did a double take and reddened, exclaiming, "S-sir, this is not-!"
At that moment Sirius just closed the door again. He needed a beer.
AN: That ending was too funny to just pass.
Hope you liked it and sorry for taking so long on an update. Love y'all