AUTHOR'S NOTE: All right…first Morgan La Fey story/plot fic up! Look for more chapters and if you like it, feel free to e-mail me!
DISCLAIMER: I don't own Oh My Goddess! That belongs to Fujishima Kosuke.Make My Dreams Come True
"Anata…I don't want to stay here anymore. Gomen…"
The shattered Gate of Judgment, standing precariously on chipped pillars, stared immovably back at her. The strangely shaped entrance called a promise to her that she could never fulfill.
One step might as well be just beyond her fingertips. It didn't change the fact that she could never be a part of it.
Morgan La Fey whispered softly, "No one comes here. Coming here…not coming here… there isn't a difference. Anata…"
She had stayed here…for what seemed the longest time. She had hoped to find someone like those two…no…Morgan smiled briefly to herself. No. She had hoped to find someone like that mortal. The mortal that reminded her so much of what she had lost. Because of that mortal, she had chosen to stay here and wait.
All that was here however, was shattered rock and a blood-red sky that never moved. All that was here was her pain and sorrow.
She wondered if Kami-Sama's blessing had brought that mortal happiness. She wondered what those two lovers had seen when they had crossed to the other side.
It brought a bittersweet smile to her face. "Anata…what would we have seen if we had made it to the other side?"
No one answered her. No one ever answered her. Maybe this was a punishment she deserved. Maybe her punishment was to stand here forever waiting.
A soft wind blew, tossing her jet-black hair across her face. Turning around, she whispered, "Gomen Anata…I'm leaving."
When the wind subsided, all that was left was the wind-scoured rock and an empty wasteland.
"Hello! You've reached the Goddess Hotline you lucky mortal you! You can wish for anything you want and yes you can even wish for me!"
Keiichi sighed weakly, "Hi Urd. Are you doing well in Heaven?"
Grimacing at the lack of enthusiasm, Urd spun her chair around to face the command console. "I'm more worried about you than about how I'm doing Keiichi. You don't sound too good."
"I'm just a bit tired. They just finished hauling all the furniture from the temple and I still need to put it all away." Leaning against the wall, the cramped apartment room was barely more than four walls and a small kitchen. Far different from the spacious temple that was large enough to accommodate three goddesses and a mortal.
Once at least…
"You didn't have to do that Keiichi." Urd's voice was slightly reproving. "Isn't that a bit like running away? This isn't like you at all."
"Things have kind of changed Urd…"
"I didn't mean it like that Keiichi. You can't crucify yourself forever. I've told you once, I've told you again. You don't need to suffer alone."
"I know. I do know…" Keiichi managed a chuckle. "But I heard you finally got your First Degree License. Congratulations."
"Don't change the subject!" Urd softened her retort. "You need anything Keiichi…call me all right? Don't think for a moment that just because I'm in Heaven I'll ever turn my back on you." She smiled. "And even if the brat won't admit it, Skuld told me to tell you the same thing."
"Keiichi…I do mean it. You have to realize that."
"…" Keiichi averted his eyes as he gripped the phone tighter.
"I'm not Belldandy's sister by blood…at least not pure blood. You are the same to me. In any other word, you are my brother even if you are a mortal."
Or to be sure…it was something like that. He didn't cry very often these days…just like he didn't smile much either. He had smiled too much in his happiness and had cried too much in his sadness. Either way, it both left him tired. So very tired.
It wasn't an accident…it was slow, sickening malaise. Belldandy was always as tough as nails…but her soul wasn't. Goddesses didn't die from sickness of the body…they died from sickness of the soul.
She had passed away as if falling into a deep sleep. Keiichi was mortal…he didn't understand any of it. He didn't understand why he couldn't save her, or why no one could do a thing to help…he didn't understand why Kami-sama could allow this to his own daughter. What the hell use was there to being a God if you couldn't do a damn thing when it damn mattered?
No…enough. He had enough of that. He wasn't Celestine. He could blame Kami-sama until the skies rained fire and still nothing would happen.
But, by every fiber in his being, by every belief he ever held dear…he would have traded his very soul just to have her back. Belldandy Morisato. That name sounded so horrible. So demeaning to a goddess.
It sounded like music to his ears…and that was all that mattered.
He had taken it for granted that they would be together for at least an eternity. That he could feel Belldandy's smile and the warmth of her hand on his forever. Now that she was gone, there were so many things he should've said…should've done.
The old peddler by the front game had already been expecting him. A bouquet of flowers was already arranged on the counter. Belldandy never had a favorite flower, but she was particularly fond of the wedding bouquet he had bought her. She had almost burst into tears when Urd whispered into her ear that she HAD to throw it out to the throngs of woman impatiently waiting by the courtyard.
But he didn't have that kind of money to spend or he would have bought her the exact same wedding bouquet every day just to see her smile.
Instead, every two weeks he bought five white roses and laid them on her grave. They smelled nice…and they didn't die very fast.
"Your arrangement is ready sir. God Bless You."
Keiichi nodded his thanks and laid the five hundred yen coin onto the counter. "Thank you." Sliding the bouquet under his arm, he entered the gate into the cemetery and slowly made his way past the seemingly endless rows of markers. Somewhere along the line, he had forgotten that people indeed did die. That death was the ultimate reference to mortality.
Belldandy's gravestone was in the fifth row, six markers down from the left. To be sure, Keiichi doubted there was a body buried in the ground. Goddesses didn't have real bodies…not flesh and blood at least. And he was sure Kami-sama would not have his daughter defiled with such an unworthy burial spot. But it was the best he, Keiichi Morisato, husband to Belldandy Morisato, could do.
His frame had grown even more wiry and he had lost some weight. His hair was on the long, scraggly side and perhaps he had grown one or two inches. He was still rather short though. That at least never changed…but he had lost much of his idealistic, naive charm. He had lost the humor in his life. Would Belldandy recognize him now?
He wasn't sure anymore. He wasn't sure he even recognized himself.
But there would be other times to think about that.
Crouching down onto one leg he slowly laid the white bouquet onto the simple gravestone. He wanted to do so much more. But there was a fine line between dreams and reality. Falling in love with a goddess was still the same as falling in love. Nothing lasts forever. It was just that…
He didn't expect forever to end so soon.
"Belldandy, I miss you…"
"He's a special mortal to you isn't he Urd?"
Hanging up the phone, Urd flipped a smile, "But I could say the same thing about you, couldn't I Peorth?"
The rather scantily clad goddess shrugged indifferently as she took up the seat next to her. "I never had a chance against Belldandy. Then again, no woman ever had a chance. Surprising isn't it that they would ever be separated?"
Urd shook her head. "I can't make Keiichi understand this…but it's not like Belldandy's dead. Not in the mortal term…and not in a way that would lessen his pain at losing her." Running a hand through her head, she sighed, "He wants to do so much, and he wants to bear the pain by himself. A mortal like that…you find maybe once an eternity."
"He's special. I won't deny you that much. But, Urd…be honest with me. I might be biased, but in some ways, I am far more practical than you are. Did you really expect that those two could stay together forever?"
Urd's eyes tightened. "What do you mean?"
Unruffled, Peorth leaned back on her chair. "I mean that, no matter how you look at it, one is a mortal and one is the daughter of Kami-sama. I don't know how much that title means to you Urd…but in Heaven, it carries considerable weight. The only reason you and Skuld weren't granted First Degree Licenses at birth was because Kami-sama himself forbade that."
"That means nothing Peorth…"
Peorth's gaze and voice were icy sharp. "I sincerely beg to differ Urd. I may not look and I definitely may not act it, but I am far older than you. I know firsthand what the weight of Kami-sama holds. Your blood is living proof that…" Trailing off guiltily, Peorth averted her eyes and bowed her head. "Forgive me Urd. I have no place to tell you that."
Urd sighed and shook her head. "No, continue. I've already known that for the longest time…"
Swallowing uncomfortably, Peorth's voice grew infinitely gentle as she placed an arm over Urd's shoulder. "Please forgive me for saying this Urd…but in Heaven, we suffer the same bias and the same stupid ignorance that we blame mortals of. Demonic blood, whether half or full, is not accepted in mainstream society. Half-demons…hanyous…are not welcomed here. It is through the shield of your father, Kami-sama himself…that much of the prejudice directed towards you is deflected. Many others are not so fortunate."
"What does that have to do with Belldandy and Keiichi?"
"I'm saying that such a union would never be accepted in Heaven. Kami-sama knows this. And deep in your heart Urd, though you may deny it, I believe you know that as well."
"It's bullshit Peorth." Feeling irrational anger surge through her veins, Urd snarled, "Those two crossed every line Father put in front of them. They even crossed the damn gate to be together…"
"And that damn gate you refer to is being forgotten Urd." Peorth steepled her fingers together and leaned forward in thought. "Heaven is closing in on itself. We are becoming too selfish…too self-absorbed in petty rationale such as the purity of blood and title. We are running out of gods and goddesses who have the purity of soul, such as you, Belldandy, and your sister Skuld, who can look beyond such distinctions."
"Where do you stand then Peorth?"
Unable to respond, Peorth averted her eyes and stared down at the table.
Staring at the goddess, as if seeing something she didn't recognize, Urd took a deep breath and let it out. "Peorth…you've been there…how can you of all people think like that?"
Guiltily raising her eyes, Peorth apologized, "I am sorry Urd. I really am. But I do not possess the clairvoyance you Norns have. The love you hold for them, I cannot understand. Maybe it is because I have lived too long…but, do not ask too much of me."
Urd smiled bitterly. "Than you must think extremely low of me…"
"Don't be stupid. Your demonic blood is a direct descendant of Hild, Queen of the Underworld. There is no shame in that." Affronted, Peorth glared at the white haired goddess. "I was the one after all, who petitioned to Kami-sama for your First Degree License. And trust me, it was no easy task!"
Blushing, Urd grimaced. "I told you I'd owe you one…"
"I would hope so!"
Backing down, Urd waived her arms in surrender. "I'm sorry! I'm sorry Peorth! I know you're someone I can trust."
Slightly mollified, Peorth crossed her arms, "I would hope so Mrs. Urd."
"Don't get formal with me. Is there any particular reason why you came here? You just did get promoted to Director of the Earth Assistance Hotline after all. Aren't you a bit busy?"
"It might be something next to nothing…" Peorth's face grew slightly pensive. "But it might be something larger."
"What is it?"
"The Gate of Judgment. The Fairie Morgan La Fey has disappeared."
Slightly stunned, Urd stammered, "But I thought she wanted to stay there of her own will. Where did she go?"
"I was under the same impression as you were. We didn't punish Morgan for her insurrection with Celestine against Heaven because she agreed to stay at the Gate. There are many people in Heaven though, who disagreed with that choice. Now that she's broken the agreement, she may be in serious trouble."
Urd shook her head. "She's not a bad person though…"
"But she's not a goddess. She's a Natural. A Fairie."
"What does that mean?"
"It means in Heaven, there aren't enough people who are willing to defend a Fairie. Not one with as colorful a record as Morgan."
Urd took the time to digest this before she mused out loud, "What is she planning to do?"
"So far she's managed to evade trace. Kami-sama won't go out of his way to find her… she is only a Fairie. But, that doesn't mean he won't send down a Valkyrie or two if she's detected. I don't know Urd. I really, just don't have any answers."
Morgan La Fey. Type 1 Natural Class Two License. Urd remembered her quite well: The heartbroken Fairie who defied Kami-sama and allied herself with the fallen God Celestine.
She wasn't powerful enough to be a considerable threat. She had neither the power of Elementals such Oberon King of the Fairies or Nidogg the Eater of the Roots. But, something in her, perhaps her anger, her rage, had made her decide to bend Fate itself and defy a power that she had no chance of defeating.
Spiraling to the side as her Angel beat its wings to steady her in the air, Urd grimaced as the fairie in front of her glared at her dispassionately. She couldn't possibly think she stood a chance against a goddess…Second-Class or not, Urd doubted that Morgan could win.
But it was difficult to read the fairie's expression. Completely neutral, she floated in mid-air with the poise and grace of a dancer, her limbs completely relaxed as her butterfly-like wings fluttered gently in the harsh wind.
"Why are you doing this Fairie Morgan?"
It was a simple question. Maybe too simple.
A small smirk blossomed on Morgan's face as she stared at her disdainfully. As if she expected nothing more from Urd.
"You goddesses are all the same."
And even though Morgan had accepted her fate, Urd doubted that the Fairie's beliefs changed. At the Gate of Judgment, she had made amends with Keiichi rather than with Belldandy. In a sense, she made the decision to let Keiichi go rather than accept his love for Belldandy.You goddesses are all the same…
And now, Morgan had once again left the Gate of Judgment. And for what reason this time? There had to be a reason…Morgan was too intelligent to risk everything on a whim.
Urd sighed, "Why ARE you doing this…Fairie Morgan?"
It had been a long time since she had walked upon an earth that gave way to her feet. The soft grass that cushioned the soles of her feet and a soft wind that raised no dust to burn her eyes. It was peaceful here…this tranquil environment. Mortals didn't understand what a gift this was…and Immortal's didn't understand the inspiring breadth and width of what they had created.
It seemed ironic. Morgan was not surprised the Goddess Belldandy could find love in this place rather than Heaven. She herself had found her love…the difference was Kami-sama did not deem it worthy to be blessed.
But that was a product of her own weakness as well. Morgan shook her head. It served no purpose dwelling on those thoughts. All it would do was drive her insane.
And it seemed the temple here was abandoned. Standing on the courtyard, the temple itself seemed to be in mourning…she could sense a great deal of sadness here. It seemed so completely at odds with her limited experiences in it. It usually should have been filled with too many people at too few rooms. Mortals laughing, singing…drinking so much sake, they're faces would be drowning in their own inebriation.
Morgan would never understand that aspect of mortal mentality.
It was here too, that she had first made contact with the beloved of Belldandy. The mortal known as Keiichi Morisato. Although it didn't strike her until sometime afterward, what had piqued her curiosity were the uncanny similarities between this man and her own beloved. Not just their looks…but also that distinct innocence of soul…
Running a hand along the column of the temple, she asked quietly, "Where are they? What could have happened here?"
"MISS! You can't be here! This is private property!"
A mortal in a blue uniform came running down the pathway. Turning around to face him, Morgan thought with relief that it had been prudent after all to assume her mortal form beforehand. She had not changed much from last time. A tight black jumper and jeans with a red trench coat and high boots.
Running up to her, the man pointed at the gate in the front entrance. "This place has been locked down. Didn't you see the sign in front?"
She had, not that it mattered much. Still though, this mortal might be able to give her some information. "Where did the people who lived here go?"
"The people who lived in this temple. Where did they go?"
"OH…this place used to be a crazy place." He bent his head and whispered, "Between you and me, people thought witches lived here…weird things happening and all."
"Goddesses. They were goddesses. But where did the mortal go?"
"Goddesses…mortals? Lady, what are you talking about?"
Feeling her patience break, Morgan pushed the man aside and began walking down the pathway towards the exit. "Never mind. You are of no use to me."
"Hey wait a minute! Slow down! I was just about to tell you!"
Stopping, Morgan tilted her head slightly to listen.
"There used to be three girls here. Nice girls too. The boy, K…something…married the woman with the brown hair and blue markings on her face. He moved out of the temple just the past week…and the other two girls just disappeared."
Morgan's eyes narrowed. The goddesses returned to Heaven? Why? "And his beloved? Where did she go?"
"She didn't go anywhere miss…"
The officer lowered his cap and looked abashedly at the floor. "You can find her at the Nekomi Cemetery. She died two months ago."
Morgan's eyes widened, "That's impossible…they received the blessing from Kami-sama." Her right hand involuntarily clenched into a fist as she physically repressed the anger in her heart. "How? How did she die?"
"No one knows really…things got really hush-hush around here though. It's a real shame though…those two were so happy together. In fact, they made a lot of people happy just watching them. A real shame…"
Just like I lost someone so precious to me…Kami-sama…you did this to your own DAUGHTER? Even after giving your blessing to them? The irony was almost too great. It truly was…she had come down to Earth to receive an answer. She had wanted to ask Keiichi so many things…
Have you found your happiness?
Is falling in love such a dangerous thing?
Do you think I could find someone like you in this world? Is there a chance that I can fall in love again?
How could he give her an answer to her questions now? Like her, his beloved had been taken by Kami-sama. Her voice came out harsh and rasping even to her ears. "That can't be…not even Kami-sama can be that cruel."
Noticing her tense posture, the man swallowed nervously, "Were they friends of yours?"
That was a stupid question. As if the honored daughter of Kami-sama would have ever deigned to look down upon a mere Fairie. But it hurt so much because that mortal didn't deserve this…he deserved to find his happiness. He who had taken all the risks on his shoulders deserved to find love.
Because what Morgan saw far more clearly than anyone else was the selfishness of Kami-sama. Belldandy may have been presumptuous to defy all regulations to be with Keiichi, but she was still the daughter of Kami-sama first. Cruel or not, no Father would wish his daughter's unhappiness.
The mortal was a different matter…
There would be few in Heaven who would have a qualm over his "tragic" passing. Heaven was not perfect. Kami-sama was not perfect. And in forcing the mortal to accept those risks, it only showed that Belldandy was not perfect either.
Morgan was not perfect either…but she had never professed to be. She did not have the heart to love a world like Belldandy could nor did she have the power to protect all she loved like Belldandy could. And for a mortal such as Keiichi, the burden must have been even greater. Falling in love was not easy…but if the end was as miserable as the beginning, than what was the use?
Unable to respond, Morgan could almost feel herself at the gates of despair. This was almost as bad as walking through the Gate of Judgment and realizing her beloved's touch was gone forever when they reached the other side. Once again, she had no answers to her questions. She had chosen the goddess and the mortal as a sign that perhaps in this bitter world, there might be some happiness. That when the mortal found his happiness, that it meant somewhere along the line, Morgan La Fey might re-find her happiness as well.
"Are you all right Miss?" The man's slightly worried voice brought Morgan back into the real world.
She was probably going to break down any second. She knew it. But not here, not at this temple. Wrapping her red trench coat tighter around her body, she spun around and began walking towards the barred temple entrance.
"AH MISS! It's locked! Here, let me unlock it for you…"
Ignoring the officer, Morgan gripped the lock and tore the chain in half. Tossing the heavy metal to the side, it fell to the pavement with a heavy thud. The stunned look in the man's eyes was almost palatable.
A soft voice came from the other side, "Ano…are you guys still moving stuff out? I can come back later if you want…"
Swinging the door open, Morgan's eyes widened as her breath caught in her chest as she came face-to-face with a pair of equally surprised eyes. Standing on the steps to the temple, the beloved of Belldandy, the mortal Keiichi Morisato stood uncertainly, a hand still raised ready to knock on the door.
It almost broke her heart…it really did. This mortal hid his sadness well…but Morgan could see it so clearly. His shoulders were slumped, making him seem smaller than he really was. His face was more haggard and his eyes seemed so tired. But what Morgan couldn't stand was that aura of wasted life and weariness that wrapped all around him. That slow-death that Morgan had felt in herself for so long until it all turned to blind fury and revenge.
But he was mortal…he knew there was nothing he could do…
Don't look like that…please don't look like that.
Morgan felt a tear slip down her eye and course down her cheek. Another followed and another until it dripped down her chin and splashed down to the pavement below.
You of all people…please don't look like that.
Concerned, Keiichi took a step forward. "Are you alright Miss?"
It was what broke her. Sobbing, Morgan threw herself against his chest and began crying hard into his shirt. Gripping the lapels of his jacket, she sobbed until she thought the world might drown in her tears and die along with her. How long she cried, she didn't know…and why he didn't push her away, she didn't know.
All she could see was the pain in his eyes that mirrored the pain in her heart. So she cried. Because it was all she could do.Don't look like me…