Disclamer: -Man belongs to Hoshino Katsura
Rating: T. For now? It'll bump up to M sooner or later as I go through whatever the hell I've got now.
Author's Note: So I got sucked into DGM a couple of weeks ago and of course my current obsessions just had to mingle together and threw this monstrosity at me. I… have no idea where this will go. I don't have a concrete plot for this. This is mostly things that got vomited out by my brain from college stress.
Don't expect regular updates. I write when I feel like it and sometimes life gets in the way and sucks all my inspiration out of me. Forcing myself to write will just give you mediocre writing so… If you do like this, please bear with me and my very irregular updates.
Also this thing wasn't read through. I might go through it again, but if you spot any grammar or spelling errors please do tell me.
Edit (25/9/2016): I… forgot that Allen couldn't move his arm until after Mana's death but ahhh, I'm already 5 chapters in when I realized this so… I'm so sorry?
Beta by: Black Maya
'You know what? Screw the world.' I thought as I glared at my left arm. My very red, very vein popping arm with a glowing green cross on the top of my hand.
'Who the hell thought it was a good idea to let me reincarnate, dammit.' I huffed in frustration and ran a hair through my now short dirty red hair.
'I lived my damnable life,' I glared in distaste at my red hair. 'I don't need to live another one… Especially as a bloody gender-bent version of freaking Allen Walker.'
Screaming in frustration, I stood up and kicked at the ground. This could not be happening. When people die, they were supposed to stay dead. And if they do wake up, it wasn't supposed to be with all their damn memories. I was not supposed to wake up as a manga character of a series that hadn't even finished yet.
'I'd take getting reborn into bloody Naruto. At least that monster of a manga was over and done with.' I fumed, wanting nothing more than to scream my frustrations out and curse the world. 'As much as I love the thought of living the riches of the late 19th century, I'm an orphan with a Parasitic Innocence imbedded into my arm with a destiny that involves emotionally and physically scarring events.'
Abruptly, I stopped and paled dramatically. Nea Walker. The Fourteenth. The Musician. The Noah that will take over my body sooner or later.
"Oh gods, no. Please, no." I muttered as I shuddered in terror thinking of what I might have to go through in this life. I gripped at my arms, trying to subside my shivers and biting my lower lip, a bad habit that seemed to have been carried over. "I'm not Allen. I can't do this. I can't be what he was. Is... Will be... Whatever!" I threw my arms up in irritation.
Sighing, I lowered my arms and looked on dejectedly at the trees surrounding me. I was in the forest behind the orphanage I was currently living in. I didn't know that Allen Walker had first lived in an orphanage before working in the circus and living with Mana Walker. But since I saw there were some kids over the age of 10 in the orphanage, I assumed they threw Allen out young. Probably because of his arm.
A rush of anger filled me at the thought. How dare they? To throw a little boy, no matter the defection of his arm into the cold world without the safety of a shelter was inhumane. I understood why they did it, of course. They didn't know about Innocence and because of its appearance, they thought it was something from hell or Satan or whatever. It was within human nature to fear what they did not understand and it showed in my past life's history.
Humans went to war with each other because they feared what they didn't understand. They hated on what was different from them and scorned them with every excuse under the sun. Religion, race, gender, sexuality – everything. It was worse in the earlier centuries when equality and peace was practically non-existent.
'And I now live in those earlier centuries. Where prejudice and blind devotion rules the sheep of the world.' I scoffed before shaking my head.
'For now, I have to get ready. From the looks of things, the orphanage will be kicking me out soon.' I had seen the fearful looks the sisters of the orphanage wore. There was only so long till their cowardly bravery ran out. 'I am not joining the damn circus… Though I probably should?'
I really didn't want to get involved in the -Man storyline. I may have the damnable Innocence, but I could maybe just get away with becoming a normal exorcist if I could just avoid it. The Black Order would always be looking for people that can use Innocence and I know I can't avoid an organization that big for long. I was currently… 5? Maybe 6. And it wasn't like I could do much in terms of surviving on my own. Especially since I was unfamiliar with how the world worked in the current age.
I sighed, wondering if I shouldn't just try to find the Earl and get killed so I wouldn't have to deal with this bullshit. I shook my head at that. I wasn't going to be a coward no matter how easy it would be.
'Suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem.' I repeated the mantra that had been my saving grace as a depressed young adult in my last life. I knew my life was going to suck like hell from now on but I was going to push through it. I was going to keep on walking.
'…Oh god. I just quoted the series' tagline.'
My mission started with trying to find a nice enough place to work in. I had found some old bandages in the cupboards of the orphanage and wrapped my entire left arm in it before going out.
'Sorry, Crown Clown. You're pretty cool, but you are kind of an irritating asset right now.'
So on I went, trying to find decent enough human beings that won't turn me away at the sight of my arm. I knew my way around the kitchen and while it might be a bit harder being midget size, I would make it work. And if it didn't, hopefully I could get away with some manual labour.
I had dressed myself in an old pair of pants and shirt I bribed out of an older orphan with my meagre share of food. With my roughly chopped hair, I looked like a boy. Which was good because a little girl wandering the streets was just asking for trouble.
So off I went, going from shop to shop trying to find a job and almost begging to tears. I sighed in frustration, trying to keep my tears at bay as the 8th shop I tried slammed the door in my face. I sniffled and grimaced as the feelings of shame, desperation and anger washed through me. I wanted to glare and screech at my Innocence riddled arm for not giving me a chance at a somewhat normal second life but held it in. I would work with the damn cards I was given, no matter how bad they were.
"Uh, little boy?" A hesitant voice called. I ignored it since I thought there was no way someone was calling me, and continued to sniffle as I tried to get my emotions under control. Which was probably the reason why I jumped when someone laid a hand on my shoulder.
I twirled around quickly and saw a young man, probably in his late teens or early twenties, carrying a small case alongside a duffle bag. He looked kind with soft brown eyes and hair and was wearing a modest suit and trench coat. He knelt down in front of me and I backed away slightly, not sure if I could trust this man not to just grab and sell me or something.
The man smiled as he held out a hand. I stared at it for a while, unsure what to do before turning my eyes to his face. He was fairly handsome, I mused. His appearance kind of reminded me of Osamu Dazai from Bungou Stray Dogs for some reason.
"Why are you looking for a job, little one?" He asked, his hand never dropping from its raised state in front of me.
I stared at the man warily, not sure if I should answer or not but I saw what might've been concern in his face and pursed my lips in thought. There really wasn't any harm in telling this man why. He didn't seem like a bad person. In fact, he… felt different to the other people in this town. Nodding to myself, I answered him.
"I think the orphanage is going to kick me out soon… So I wanted to get a job and lodgings for myself so I won't have to live in the streets." I answered truthfully. Lies got you nowhere, only disappointment and a betrayal in trust.
The man tilted his head and his eyebrows rose in shock. Whether it was because of my answer or because of how ridiculously articulate I was, I didn't know. "Why would they want to kick you out?"
Pausing, I debated whether to answer or to just show him my arm. I might be misunderstood if I tried to explain because I really didn't know how to explain my arm without giving away that I knew what it was. And while he might freak out and hit me or something for it, I knew I was small and fast enough to get away and hide out for a while. So, I undid the bandages on my left arm and showed my Innocence to the man.
"…How… How did you get that…?" The man asked as he stared at my arm with a pale face.
I shrugged and muttered, "I was born with it."
The man's eyes narrowed and I didn't know if that was a good thing or a bad thing, but I prepared for the worst anyway and took a step back. That jolted him and he gave me a reassuring smile.
"It doesn't bother me, really." His smile widened. "You can't help it if you were born with it…"
I blinked at the easy acceptance. This was something I expected out of people from the twenty-first century, not from the people in this age. But I suppose there were exceptions to the rules in any age.
"Is your arm the reason people keep rejecting jobs for you?" He continued asking and I nodded as I rewrapped my bandages. He hummed for a bit and looked at the sky seemingly thinking. "What's your name?"
I blinked and went through the short memories of this life, only now realizing that no one had really named me in this life. The sisters at the orphanage only called the girl or demon. I really didn't want to keep the name Allen Walker… But completely erasing his presence in this world brought a heavy feeling of guilt inside of me. I had already taken over his life, though I had decided to try to not follow the damn storyline that sought to bring Allen Walker to his knees in grief. Did I really want to fully erase Allen Walker's presence in this world?
… God, I really felt guilty about this even though it wasn't even my bloody fault I was reincarnated into Allen freaking Walker.
"…Ellen." I compromised, grimacing at following the many gender bent fanfiction's butchering of Allen's name. But it was the best I could come up with right now.
"Well then, Ellen. How about you accompany me as an aide of sorts…" And then he blinked as if he just finished processing the information he received. "Wait, Ellen? As in a girl?"
I blinked, a little amused that I forgot I was wearing boys' clothes and at the offer he made. "Yes."
"Oh god I didn't even notice, I'm so sorry!" He blurted out, clearly flustered. "I shouldn't have even said that, I am–"
"It's fine!" I exclaimed, blushing a little when he startled and stared at me. "I mean. I really do need a job and a place to stay…"
His eyes crumpled in compassion and an easy smile. "If you want to follow me… I don't exactly live here. I'm a travelling violinist so… We won't stay in one place for very long…"
I shook my head quickly. "I don't mind. I really do want to get out of this place… And if I'm with you here, you might not be able to find a place to play in… I'll hide my arm when we leave. So no one will know."
I saw a flash of concern and what seemed like anger before a slightly strained smile made its way to his lips. "That… You can leave the bandages off with me. But yes. I'm sorry but it might be better if you hid that arm…"
I smiled at him genuinely. "It's okay. Humans fear what they don't understand. So I know even if it's unfair, that's the way life is."
The man blinked. "You sure are a wise little girl." He mused. "My name is Nathan, by the way. It's nice to meet you, Ellen."
I beamed at Nathan. "It's nice to meet you… And I look forward to working for you, Mr. Nathan!"