Prolog

Lenore H. McCoy had spent the last few weeks drinking. She had it all at the beginning of last month then it all went to shit. She had been promoted, had a husband, been pregnant... then it all vanished.

She came home to her and Neil's apartment after a double shift, which should have been a triple but she was relieved due to her condition. She was excited to tell him she was pregnant. She had decided to wait until after the first trimester to tell him why she had suddenly kicked drinking to the curb when she had opened her door and discovered a shirt thrown on the ground in their living area and had rolled her eyes at his sloppiness and continued to way to the bedroom before she noticed something passing through the dining room: a bra that was most assuredly not hers slung onto one of the chairs surrounding the table. Her chair, but not her bra.

She swallowed hard before continuing down the hallway, praying it wasn't true while the back of her mind screamed at her to leave and don't look back. The bedroom door was open and we'll known grunts and moans were accompanied by unknown soft sighs and words of encouragement.

Lenore stopped in front of the bedroom doorway, eyes closed before opening them to a sight that made her sick to her stomach before choking out a sob and slapping her hand over her mouth as the two adulterers jerked apart, knowing they had been caught. Neil and her best friend Sarah, what a mother fucking cliché.

She stumbled away from the door and down the hall, the two of them following after her, calling for her to stop and listen to what she was sure would be a heartfelt explanation of their actions. She ignored them and ripped open the door and stepped out to take the stairs. She couldn't wait for the elevator and hear their voices. a hand grabbed her arm after she had flung open the stairwell doors as she reached the steps. She jerked away. Her jerking away was the worst thing she could have done.

In a moment of abject horror she realized she was falling and had covered her stomach the best she could, knowing the concrete steps would be immensely unforgiving and she was right. The last thing she remembered before the black was the pain in her abdomen, at the base of her spine, and the blood dripping down her face.

When she had awoken two days later it was to a flat stomach with no bump or swelling and her coworker, an Andronian named Dr. Thy'Lan standing over her, her dominate hand clasped in the blue aliens smaller one.

She heard it all. The same information she knew from the instant she had woken up. The fetus had been removed. Her baby girl was no longer in her. Johanna was dead.

Neil tried to visit her and had gotten a plate of shitty hospital food thrown at him. Sarah had tried to apologize and had been met with silence.

Lenore had called for a divorce, arranged a funeral, and resigned from the hospital the same day she was discharged. Neil and her had met twice, once with their attorneys present and papers already drawn up. The only things she kept were her own savings account, her grandmother's cross, and her medical books.

Neil had looked remorsefully at her during the three hour process, but she knew it was simply in longing to the daughter they had been tried so long for which lead to the second time they had met. Lenore had a tombstone carved for her daughter to put in the McCoy family plot and had passed him after she left four hours after it had been placed.

So now it was a little less than a month later with her savings account and depleting due to drinking and she made the dumbest decision that would define the rest of her life: she decided to join Starfleet. After all, he had taken her world from her; all she had left were her bones.