Yo, wassup guys. It's With Death Comes More Death coming at you with the first chapter of a new story.
As you can see, it's an OreGairu and DanMachi crossover and before you say it, I know one of these already exists over on SpaceBattles. Hell, I myself am a huge fan of it. It's existence is actually why I made this here story. It gave me ideas and it took me this long for me to actually put those ideas down.
Why? Well, the story I'm talking about was still going on at the time and I didn't want to step on his toes. Also, I was pretty sure that being able to match his quality was impossible, so I decided to hold off on writing it.
What's changed? Well, the story I'm talking about ("My Trans-Dimensional, Overpowered Protagonist, Harem Comedy is Wrong as Expected" by Sage_of_Eyes) has kind of, sort of been discontinued for a good while now, so I decided that it was probably fine to try and write a little something of my own. So, I'm doing it.
Don't like it? Well…you can go fuck yourself. :)
Wow, I'm such a goddamn professional.
Anyway, enjoy this. As I actually want this to become a long-running series of mine instead of just a side project, I'm going to be going by a hard, one-month update deadline with a minimum of at least four-thousand words per chapter.
Am I going to regret the decision to give myself a deadline? Yeah, probably. I am in my senior year of high school with another whole story that I need to write for after all, but let's just see how things turn out before we start jumping to any conclusions.
I don't own either of these series.
-Chapter 1: Unfortunately, Some Exposition is Needed-
Recently, my life has changed quite a bit.
As of just a week ago, I was coming up on the end of my second year of high school, living a life that saw fluctuating amounts of change. It started out showing small amounts of change, then lots of it and then, the curve dipped back down suddenly as the year inched closer to its end. It was almost as if my life was the living embodiment of that curved-line almost every literature teacher uses to explain plot structure in novels to their students.
Beginning, rising action, climax, falling action and resolution. To me, it was almost as if my life was running exclusively by that formula.
Truth be told, I really didn't mind the fact that my life had suddenly plateaued like it did. All it did was confirm to me the fact that I wasn't living in some sort of RomCom series with me as the protagonist, which was something that I was actually thinking about considering to be the truth after everything that happened to me.
My life, at that time, had just become way too eventful, way too quickly. In the span of just a few months, I went from being a cynical loner with no friends and no desire to make them, to a cynical loner who did have friends and didn't mind having them for the most part.
…what?! I know that doesn't sound like much of a change for someone to make, but it was still a pretty significant shift in philosophies for someone as lazy as me to make! Seriously, you try to get an already self-aware slacker to change! I'll bet you everything I own that you won't be able to! It's like trying to maintain a decent life after waking up in the same world that also contains a giant sword wielding man named Guts. It just isn't ever going to happen. No matter how hard you try. So, you might as well go die in preparation. 
Anyways, what I'm trying to say is that my life had gotten so eventful, that my life was actually starting to feel like it was a RomCom. So, the sudden plateauing of any and all action told me that I was still indeed living within the realms of reality, and to even think something like that was possible was absolutely idiotic of me.
Yeah! Who cares that I was forced to change my very outlook on life by a group of multiple women, who may or may not have feelings for me, after I was forced to join a club that I had no intention of joining on my own fruition?! I can't find a single reason to think that my life has become some sort of light novel! My life is and never will be the basis of some sort of shitty light novel!
…or, at least, that's what I thought a week ago. It turns out that my life can indeed be the basis of some sort of shitty light novel.
How do I know? Well, that's because my life has most definitely become the basis of some sort of shitty light novel.
Remember that change I mentioned earlier? I was referring to exactly that. What tipped me off to the change?
Well, the fact that I went to bed one night and then proceeded to wake up in an entirely new, and definitely unfamiliar area, that looked to be ripped out of some western fantasy novel, but with a many scantily-clad, dark-skinned women roaming the streets was a pretty big tip off.
Seriously, I need to learn when to stop running my big, fat mouth sometimes. All that it seems to do at times is cause me trouble… At least, I didn't get punched and dragged into somesort of strange club this time.
"Mhm, Hachiman-kun…" muttered the being that was using my bare chest like it was some sort of body pillow, before she began rubbing her incredibly soft cheek into aforementioned part of my body, "…so warm."
Oh wait, that's exactly what happened…but a lot. Fucking. Worse. Fuck me and my big, fat mouth sometimes.
When I was a spry, young lad, who could still think optimistic and happy thoughts about the world, one could pretty much describe me as the prototypical example of something called the 'chunnibyou'.
During those happy, delusional days, I would fantasize about what exactly I would do if I were to suddenly wake up in another world. I'd wonder about the things I needed to do to try and get a solid footing in a world that was wholly familiar to me, and then what I would need to do to live an extremely successful life. Back in the day, I remember coming up with a whole plan that seemed one-hundred percent foolproof to my delusional, adolescent mind.
That plan, of course, got thrown in the garbage the moment I first opened my eyes and figured out what exactly happened to me. Ah, hours of thought and effort being thrown away, just like that. It really makes me feel as though I spent those earlier years well… Sarcasm being fully intended there.
Anyway, the moment I realized I was in a new world, my mind immediately defaulted to the one thing I knew to do in a situation like that: panic. I panicked pretty hard. Truth be told, I went into a full-blown panic attack for about an hour after I realized. What sucked even more was that it happened in a completely desolate alleyway, so no one came to help me. Overall, it just wasn't a fun experience for me.
After a while, when I finally managed to calm myself down, I didn't prove to be any more productive with my time. My emotions just overpowered my ability reasoning once again and I just sort of started wandering around the city that I now found myself in, wallowing in self-pity as I hopelessly gazed at the all of the medieval-style architecture that had a little bit of modern influence to it that stood around me.
Everyone and everything I knew about my old life was gone. Just like that. With no warning.
Being someone who's been teased and bullied near their entire life, I wasn't unfamiliar with the concept of being sad, but this time, it was completely different. What I was feeling at the time was real despair. The kind you only feel when a beloved one gets seriously injured or passes away.
The pit that gouged itself into my stomach felt like it was bottomless. Every part of my body felt numb. My mind wasn't really taking in any information on the world around me. I was really just a body floating in purgatory. Senseless and devoid of any emotion.
If it wasn't for the fact that I got accosted by a girl with silvery-blue hair and a simple, bright green maid's outfit, I'd probably still be at it. The moment I focused my gaze on to her, she flashed me an extremely luminescent smile-one that unnerved me greatly for some reason or another-and asked if I was okay. I was just about to give into my own paranoia and then her away when I realized the opportunity the girl before me presented.
She was an inhabitant of the unfamiliar world I now found myself in. The information she'd be able to give me was too valuable to turn her away. So, I did something that was totally out of my nature and put all my trust in a nice girl I didn't know at all. Truly, it was the one of the most desperate situations I've ever faced.
Best case scenario, I establish my first contact in this new world and probably find a place to sleep, if lucky. Worst case scenario, I wake up being in some sort of terrible, bondage-based male sex-trafficking ring.
Hm, looking back on it, I probably should've put more thought into that decision. That was way too close of a call right there! Also, what the hell kind of light novel did I end up in?! I seriously can't believe that might've actually been the first scene of this series! Just who in the hell is writing this book?!
Ebina? No, the fact that the first person I met was a cute girl and not some riajuu pretty boy is a testament to the fact she didn't write this.
Zaimokuza, then? No, that chunnibyou is nowhere near ballsy enough to even imply something like that in something he writes.
The both of them together?! Ah, no! That's too scary of a mental picture! Crap! Get out of my mind impure thoughts! Delete! Delete! Delete! 
What was I talking about again? Oh yeah, the girl that helped me.
After I told the girl that I didn't know where I was and needed some help, she brought me to a bar called the Hostess of Fertility. At first, I was hesitant to step inside a place with such a sketchy name, but I eventually pushed past it.
Upon first stepping inside of the bar, my nose was immediately met with the smell of really, really good food. That was when I realized my earlier inhibitions were probably misguided. It admittedly wasn't a subject I knew a lot about (then again, that's probably a good thing), but I seriously doubted that a brothel would waste time and effort trying to serve its patrons good food. I mean, really, that's not what the people coming to a brothel are looking to eat, y'knoooow~?
Also, the fact there were plenty of women in the bar drinking, eating, and being generally loud and obnoxious alongside all of the men told me as much. It also told me that women here in this world were essentially equal to the men, which was relieving to say the least. The last thing I wanted to do was have to adjust to a world that was both technically and socially behind my own.
So, after the girl excitedly sat me down at the bar, we went through the basic introductions. Names were exchanged-it turned out her name was Syr Flova, by the way-and I got myself a decent amount of information on where I was.
Orario. That was the name of the city I now found myself in. It had the title of being the largest and busiest city in all of the world-a title that was bestowed upon it, because of its close proximity to the 'dungeon'. Actually, it happened to sit right on top of it, making it a world famous mecca as the Dungeon was the only place to abundantly get a material called 'monster crystals', which apparently was the main power source of this world.
Flova then proceeded to describe to me how 'monster crystals' were formed. People with literal blessings from the gods-who, at some point in the past, came down from paradise and bestowed upon the weak human race a way to get immense, god-like power-would head into the dungeon to fight the monsters from which 'monster crystals' received their namesake.
Oh, and it should be noted that the girl telling me all of this did indeed ask me how I wasn't able to recall such basic information, before I got any sort of explanation from her. In reply, I, of course, lied through my teeth. Told her I really couldn't remember anything other than a vague concept of my own name and age. It was a pretty scummy thing to do. Actually, it was just a scummy thing to do, nothing pretty about it, but it was a much better option than flat out telling her the truth.
Sorry Flova-san, but you're going to have to raise your social link with me, before you're able to learn such crucial things about me! I suggest you keep fighting though! Ganbare, Flova-chan~!
Still, my scumbaggery worked out. I got what I was aiming for without having to give up too much about myself, and also got a decent idea as to what I needed to do to get myself back home. Plus, I'm pretty sure that I managed to net this series quite a bit few fans by actively doing something shitty to get myself ahead.
Everyone loves an anti-hero, after all! All I need to do now is get myself a little sister to help justify all my actions and I'll be able to get away with committing genocide! Wait, I already have an younger sister to fit that mold! Sweet! Options! 
Nefarious thoughts on how to topple an entire government system aside (by that, I mean filed away for later use), I used the information Syr had given me to piece together my next course of action.
Being a proud and sometimes not so proud fan of the light novel genre, a goal popped into my mind pretty quickly. If I was ever going to get home, I needed to get myself to the end of the dungeon.
Why? Well, according to Flova, no one has ever actually gotten close to beating the dungeon, and that presented me with an impossible goal to try and achieve. Also, it seemed like a broad enough goal that I was pretty sure I would eventually come across an actual way of getting home along the way, if clearing the dungeon turned out to be a bust.
So, I decided then and there to become an adventurer and do what no man or woman has ever done, and BEAT THE DUNGEON! Ugh, that still makes me want to puke from disgust. Looks like it's going to be a while before I'm able to get rid of my slacker tendencies.
Then again, I guess I could've decided to give up and become a productive member of Oraio society. Getting a job and living out the rest of my days here in this world. Never to see my adorable imouto, a can of MAXX coffee, friends, parents or adorable imouto ever again. So, I guess the acceptance of such a lofty goal is a sign of progress for me.
After making that decision, I asked Flova-san if she knew how I could get a blessing from a god and before she was able to answer, a new voice did so for her.
Somehow, I completely managed to overlook the fact that a woman had been standing right next to me the whole time I listened to Flova-san speak. How? I don't know, but thankfully, I'm not someone who jumps very easily. So, my reaction to nearly having my heart cease beating in my chest was limited to an almost unnoticeable jump in my seat.
Despite my best efforts however, my reaction was still noticed by the two and promptly got called out for it. Flova-san did so with an airy giggle, but the then unknown woman slapped me across the face verbally… The bitch.
You aren't the only one who has the ability to blend in with a crowd! My people created the concept of ninjas! So, stop acting like you're so special!
Anyway, the bitch turned out to be a waitress at the Hostess of Fertility. Oh, and also an elf. A blonde elf. A blonde elf who didn't seem to particularly like me for whatever reason. Still, despite her blatant dislike of me, she answered my previous question. Doing so in a way that reminded me a lot of a certain ice queen from back in my world: clear, concise and filled with complete apathy for me.
Her entire answer could be summarized with: go find a god willing to give you a blessing and join their familia. I won't go into detail on what she said after all that. Mainly because she didn't say anything, but from the way she glared at me as I talked to Flova-san about finding a place to stay for the night, I could tell that she really wanted to say something, but was holding back for a reason completely beyond me. I would've asked her why, but thankfully, I decided to not be a masochistic idiot and just allowed her to continue glaring as me and Flova spoke.
To make a long story short, Flova managed to get me a room at the Hostess of Fertility, for as long as it took me to find a deity to pledge myself to after making a deal with the owner of the bar-a dwarven woman that went by the name Mama Mia, who was apparently a pretty strong adventurer and also happened to be my sole contact's boss.
The agreement went like this: for as long as I lived under Mama's roof, I'd act as one of the staff, helping them clean the dining room and kitchen at the end of every day.
Of course, I agreed to the former adventurer's proposal. Mainly because I really wasn't in any position to decline it.
I, just like everyone else in the world, needed somewhere where with four connecting walls and a roof to sleep in at night. I was sure that I'd be able to find an empty building like that through some wandering, but I also wanted to sleep in a bed at night as well and I doubted a near obliterated castle's ruins had one of those just lying around.
I did so begrudgingly. The last thing I wanted to do was get myself in a comfortable standing at the bar and gradually end up losing sight of what I really wanted.
Besides, those sort of story arcs tended to not end well anyways.
Don't get me wrong. As a teenage boy with hormones, I would never mind establishing some mutually-loving relationship with a girl I happened to meet at this bar and got know over time, but that would only bring up the opportunity for the author of this light novel to break us up in some tragic twist of fate to help motivate me into taking some action, other than just cleaning tables. Really, a chance at getting laid just wasn't worth all the trouble.
If I was in the type of light novel that I thought I was in, then I was somewhat confident in my chances. Actually, considering the god I ended up pledging myself to, I was a lot more than just confident in my chances.
So, to make an even longer story short, it took me about a day to find a god, or kami-sama, who would be willing to give me a blessing.
The process played itself out a lot easier than I expected. No rigorous, exercise-based trials or extremely incriminating blackmail was needed to convince her of my potential! Actually, all I needed to do was exist, because she was the one to come to me and ask to join her familia.
Unfortunately, she didn't do so because I had some bullshit OP-power that only she was able to sense for whatever reason-a reason that I'm sure was probably also bullshit. It was actually all because she didn't have a single other child in her familia and desperately wanted one.
When I asked her exactly why there were no other people in her familia, she proceeded to give me this entire speech about having had just started looking for familia members not too long ago and not having much to offer a person in terms of power and prestige, even if they were genuinely interested in bequeathing themselves to her-a detail that served as quite the pleasant surprise for me, as it told me that the people here in this world had much better standards than those of my world, which was filled with desperate enough men and women, all of which willing to give up anything to get a shot at a woman as beautiful as the goddess.
Still, despite the fact I had very well-founded misgivings of her proposal, I decided to keep the conversation between the two of us going and decided to ask her how many people she asked, before she came to me, as I wanted to see how valuable she thought I was and why she decided to come to me.
According to her, she went through about fifty possible candidates before she came across me asking around for a familia to join. I was being rejected by pretty much every familia I went to at the time, so figuring out why she decided on coming to me after all her earlier failures came pretty easily.
Essentially, I was her last resort. I was the one person she knew would never decline an offer, which I already knew to take as a compliment rather than as an insult as I'm sure most would. It meant that if she was in an desperate enough situation, I was an extremely valuable piece as my allegiance was all but guaranteed. All she needed to do was ask and I'd be just like putty in her hands.
Unfortunately for her, however, there was no better position of power in a negotiation than that of someone who already their own value. Me being aware of how much she needed me gave me great leverage against her. Depending on how I used it, I was fairly confident that I'd be able to hash out a deal with her that favored me immensely.
Unfortunately for me, however, I was also well aware of the reason why she found someone like me so appealing in the first place. So, I was forced to reschedule my first attempt at blackmailing a god to some later date.
Still, I didn't want the goddess thinking that I was just going to bend to her every whim, all because she was the only god who'd take me. So, I brought the fact that one could interpret what she just told me as her looking at me as someone of that nature. I must've did so in a way that made it seem like I thought she was looking down on me, because the goddess went into full-blown apology mode.
It was actually pretty adorable to see. If I was really in a light novel like I thought, I could see it being the first illustration in the book. The woman probably would've be drawn in chibi-form with tears forming in her eyes as she frantically tried to convince me of what she was saying. All the while, I'd be staring at her, completely dumbfounded by the person claiming herself to be a goddess from the lower-left corner of the frame, my eyes being represented by straight lines with dark shadows hanging just underneath them.
Wait, now that I think about it, there's no way that would be the first illustration in the book. I'm sure that it would be an illustration, but it definitely wouldn't be the first.
I'm sure that the author would have wasted it on some fan service shot of my kami-sama. I wouldn't know what she would be doing as our initial meeting was pretty mundane fair, but I'm sure it would be of her. I mean, the way she looks and dresses just screams 'walking fetish bait'! It'd be an ice-cold day in hell if the author decided to use their first illustration on anything else!
So, after the goddess managed to calm herself down, I moved to assure her that thinking that way about me was completely fine with me. I think I said something along the lines of: 'I'm already well-resigned to being some desperate woman's last resort'.
The woman laughed in response, probably thinking that I was making some sort self-deprecating joke. I, of course, was being very serious when I said that, but I wasn't about to bring that up to her. Again, not a masochistic idiot.
Anyway, I agreed to being a part of her familia and after doing some basic introductions, the goddess dragged me into a nearby bookstore, forced me out of my shirt and then laid me down to give me her blessing, or falna, as it was apparently called… Damn elf.
She probably used the wrong word on purpose just to make me look bad in front of my new kami-sama! Ha! Jokes on you, though. I can still play the amnesia card whenever I screw up, so none of your attempts at sabotaging me are going to work!
Wait, didn't Flova also say that the preferred word was blessing?! Fuck! That means she's working against me as well! Are all my only contacts in this world trying to sabotage me? Why? Just how much help did those women need?! Are they all that incompetent at their jobs? Sheesh…
Ehem… So, the ritual itself turned out be a rather simple one. After taking off my shirt, she laid me down face first on a bench and climbed up on my back.
A somewhat uncomfortable for me as what my kami-sama decided to wear on an everyday basis was essentially the length of a cocktail dress, and that, in turn, allowed a fair amount of her bare thighs to press up against the bare skin of my back, but all that went far beyond the point.
After climbing up onto me (ugh, that still sounds vaguely dirty to me, even after having already said it twice beforehand), she pressed the palms of her gloved hands on to the small of my and began to recite some chant I'm sure would've been at home in any other fantasy-based light novel series. I even didn't bother trying to memorize it as I highly doubted that I'd need something only a god could use.
Once it was complete, I felt a strange energy run through me. I didn't know where to start trying to describe it. I just felt better in every sense of the word. Stronger, faster and more energetic. I could actually feel those changes.
It was strange to say the least and knowing that she probably had the answers I needed, I immediately proceeded to ask my kami-sama about it and that eventually turned into her giving me the entire explanation on what I needed to do to get stronger.
The entire explanation lasted about an hour, but I came out of it with more knowledge on the world around me than I did an hour prior.
To achieve my goal, I needed to reach the end of the dungeon. Logic dictated that the trek to the end was a long and hard one, which would need me to get much stronger than I was now.
To become stronger, I needed to raise my stats and level up. It was sort of like I was playing a real life MMORPG or plain old JRPG.
To raise my stats, I needed to do pretty much anything associated with that individual stat. Doing parkour around would gradually raise my endurance and agility stats, lifting heavy objects would cause my strength star to rise, but nothing would get me higher stats faster than grinding away, slaughtering the monsters that lie in the dungeon.
Finally, if I wanted to level up, I needed to do something that impressed the gods themselves. Be it killing a much stronger monster earlier than I should, or saving a bunch of strangers while facing against extraordinary odds. If it managed to impress, I would take a step closer to being able to be called a god myself, which was the leveling-system meant: how close you were to wielding god-like powers.
That's what I needed to do get home. It would probably take me upwards of decades to reach a place that was anywhere near the end of the dungeon, but knowing the basics of what I needed to do gave me a just little comfort.
When the explanation concluded, I remember my kami-sama asking me if I was at all overwhelmed by what I heard. I told her that I was completely fine, which I was.
The sudden inclusion of a leveling up system threw me for a little bit of a loop, but I wasn't at all 'overwhelmed' by it per se. Actually, it made things much easier for me to understand, as it told me something that the dungeon and everything around me probably operated like an MMORPG, which I haven't played a good deal of due to the whole 'MMO' part, but I'm fairly sure my knowledge on the 'RPG' aspect would be enough to carry me through.
Once I confirmed that I did in fact understand what she was telling me, the goddess glanced outside a nearby window and saw that the day was already starting to give way to nighttime.
Upon seeing this, she told me that we should probably head over to where she and I would be living together for the time being, warning me beforehand that it was pretty run down. It didn't bother me at all and I told her that. It's free-lodging, after all and it being free would make up for how garbage it was in my books.
Really, I was more worried about the fact that she and I would be living together than where I was going to be living with her with. I mean, how would I ever control myself?! Oh, by not being a hormone-driven creep?! I can't believe I almost forgot that was an option!
Sarcasm being one-hundred percent meant to be there.
Still, my kami-sama seemed to be pleased by my near immediate acceptance of the fact. I actually think that I managed to impress her with what I said. For the first time ever, my tendency to be a cheapskate actually helped me impress a woman…
From that moment on, I knew that she and I were going to be getting along swimmingly.
So, that's how I ended up in the position I was in right now.
I mean, I know I failed to mention the five days that passed between then and now, but all of that happened to be pretty typical stuff, so I didn't feel the need to go into detail on any of it really.
The only things of note that happened was my talk with Flova after I received my falna, my first night staying with Hestia-sama-my kami-sama (I don't know how her name slipped my mind that in that earlier explanation of mine)-and my registration into the adventurer's guild, in which I got to meet my designated advisor, a bespectacled half-elf with short brown hair named Eina Tulle.
All of which, I'm sure, could be explained in some offhanded fashion when it was actually needed and not now when it definitely wasn't needed.
Right now, I needed to put all of my focus on the task ahead, which was somehow wake up my kami-sama, who was currently snuggling her head into my chest like it was a pillow.
This wasn't the first time something like this had occurred in the five days we spent living together. Actually, this was the fifth time this has happened, which meant that it's happened every day that I've spent in my new home-the basement of an abandoned and nearly ruined church that was located on the edge of Orario.
Did its frequency of occurrence mean that I was used to it happening? Nope. Really, all that it did was make me expect it to happen, which was far from actually adjusting to it.
As to why my kami-sama found it necessary to sleep next to me at night when she had a much larger bed of her own to sleep in just a few feet away? Well, it was because it was cold at night and she was very adamant about not letting me sleep in the cold and so, we shared the blanket.
Why was my chest bare, if it was so cold? Well, I only had one set of clothes and I just didn't want to have to keep washing them to get the wrinkles out.
Simple as that really. It's not like I minded any how. I had an imouto that still cared about me, after all, so I was well used to being used like I was a breathing pillow by girls I called family. Well, one was technically a 'familia' member, but my point should be obvious.
That experience would be helpful with what I had to do next.
Glancing down at my kami-sama, I can't help but stop to marvel at the beauty of the woman clinging on to me-beauty that was only made more apparent by the streams of sunlight that was pouring in through a nearby window.
Her raven-black hair, which was no longer tied up in its usual twin-tail styling, was strewn out all over the place, completely covering the two of us in her long strands-strands that looked and acted just like silk and reflected the light just as easily, a feature that was evident with how well it reflected aforementioned sunlight. That same light also bounced off the oils that had built up on her faultless, smooth alabaster skin naturally during the night, framing her perfectly sculpted heart-shaped jawline with a singular line of white.
All of those things combined reminded me of one thing, that the person I pledged myself to really was of divine ancestry.
I end up just staring at her sleeping form for a good while. Not wanting to disturb the beauty that lay before me. Well, technically speaking, she was lying on me, but that went far beyond the point I was trying to make.
For a moment, I think about just allowing my slacker instincts to take over and to just allow myself to fall back asleep, but I quickly threw that idea out of my mind.
I've already said before, I couldn't afford to allow myself to get complacent. If I wanted back home, then I needed to keep my focus.
No doubt in my mind, there would be times where sitting back and relaxing would be an actually viable option, but today, seven days into my life as an adventurer wasn't close to being one of them. There was just too much work that needed to be done.
Reaching over with my free right hand-my left was currently being suffocated by two warm hills-I lightly grasped my kami-sama's bicep and shook it just as lightly. The act elicited a small, irritated whine from her as tried to dig her face deeper into my chest.
"Mn…five more minutes," she mumbled as I felt both of her arms suddenly tighten around my abdomen-an act that caused me to fluster just a little bit. Just a little bit, I said!
Oh, and also, is this what I sounded like to Komachi when she would come to wake me up in the morning? Hm, it's no wonder why she kept doing it into her middle school years then. From what I just saw with kami-sama, I must have both looked and sounded adorable!
"Kami-sama, I need to get up." Hm, my voice sounded pretty monotone there, despite what I said about being slightly flustered. Her grip on my abdomen only tightened after I said that.
"No… Hachiman-kun should stay in bed with kami-sama!" Ugh, what in the hell did I do to deserve this level of clinginess from you, girl? Was just accepting your offer really enough to turn you like this? If so, then you're a lot more desperate that I initially thought! "Besides… I know Hachiman-kun doesn't want to leave me either. He may never show it, but I can tell that he's lazy deep down to the bones."
What? How did you know— I mean, when did you get that impression of me, kami-sama? I'd have thought that you had a lot more faith in your child?! I mean, I'm your only child, but still!
"Hestia-sama," I made sure to use her actual name this time, "you and I both know—"
"Okay, okay…" The goddess whined loudly as she suddenly unlatched herself from me and rolled over so that she was now facing away from me. Hey, you don't have to get pouty just because you know I'm right. That's awfully unbecoming of a goddess, you know… Ugh, when the hell did I end up becoming the one responsible person in this familia? "…hmph, my child is no fun…"
Letting out a sigh, I pick myself up from the couch that served as my bed for the past five days. It wasn't a terribly comfortable thing, I was probably being generous when I said that, but it was all I had, so I learned to live with it.
There was always using kami-sama's bed. The two of us already sleep next to one another, so it wouldn't be that much of a departure. Still, I felt somewhat hesitant to actually do so. It felt like a very final decision for whatever reason.
Kind of like that one choice in a visual novel. The one choice that you know will lock you into a route. That's sort of what that bed felt like to me. It was weird and probably idiotic feeling to have, but I didn't want to take the risk just yet.
This was a light novel world, after all. I think doing something like that might actually lock me into a route and I sure as hell wasn't going to do that accidentally. If, and this was a large 'if', I was ever interested in doing something like that, I sure as hell would do what all VN-players did: play the game for a little bit, find the best girl and then look up the route guide.
"…" Not knowing how to respond to what my kami-sama just said, I decide to opt for silence and just get on with the morning routine I was trying to get accustomed to.
Alright, it was: put on clothes, brush teeth, get something to eat for breakfast and then get all of the equipment I needed for my day inside of the dungeon strapped on.
Of course, everything went as planned up until I reached that very last part. I was still having trouble with putting on my armor. Then again, that was probably to be expected since not too long ago, my morning routine really only ever became as complicated as sometimes being the one to make Komachi breakfast.
"So, are you going to see that maid from the bar?" My kami-sama asks me as I fumble with the strap of my steel chest piece-the only piece of armor I could afford.
Confused by the sudden question, I stop trying and failing at putting on my chest piece, and spare a glance over towards where her voice came from, nearly jumping when I find that she was standing right behind me.
"Um…yes?" I answer hesitantly. She was still pouting. That couldn't be a good sign, right? I definitely need to be very careful here.
"Is she still making you those lunches?" My entire body locks up when I suddenly feel a pair of soft, thin hands grasp the both of my own hands and suddenly pull them away from the strap I had been having with. Shit! I could feel a deep miasma hanging around her. For a man, something like that means that a painful death is imminent! Clearly, I needed to be very careful with what I said next.
Thank you father for inadvertently sacrificing yourself to teach me that lesson when I was a child. I promise that your sacrifice won't have been in vain!
"Yes…?" Shit! That wasn't careful at all! Why the hell did I pose that as a question?!
"Oh?" Oh no… That inflection she used… Ah! What's with this sudden pressure wrapping around my chest? Am I going to die? Is this how I go out? Death by envious fan service character?! …You know what? Now that I think about it. Not the worst way to go out. "Really?"
Mentally, I braced myself for my coming fate as I felt the pressure wrapped around my chest increase more and more, before suddenly it…stopped.
Eh? It stopped?
Turning my gaze downwards, I found that my chest piece was now fixed firmly to my chest, instead of just hanging loosely in front of it.
I guess kami-sama must've fixed the strap for me. So, she wasn't trying to cave in my chest cavity? Great. Now, I feel guilty.
Glancing over my shoulder at my kami-sama, I found that she was now standing besides me. I didn't fail to notice the frown that marred her features.
Great. Now I feel even more guilty.
"Um, kami-sama…are you alright?" I glance away as I ask that question. A tad of a fluster burning on my face as I do so. Seriously, why am I getting so flustered for, all of a sudden? I'm just apologizing for gods' sake!
In response, she let out a sigh and stated, "It's just that as your kami-sama, I feel like I'm not doing as much for you as I could be."
"What? The hell are you babbling on about?" My eyes subconsciously narrow as I say that. "You've done more than enough." For some reason, the thought of my kami-sama berating herself in such a way irritated me to no end. "Stop talking such nonsense."
"I'm being serious, though!" She exclaimed back in response. "As your kami-sama, it's my job to provide you with your every necessity!" She turned her gaze downwards as she added, "Do you know how hard it is to see your only child being fed by some barmaid, just because you don't have enough money to feed them! It just makes me feel so helpless!"
"So, what are you going to do about it then?" I was going to retort her previous claim of being 'helpless', but I swiftly deduced that it wouldn't do anyone much good. Being the lone member of her familia, helpless was a pretty reasonable thing for her to feel. So, instead of pointlessly attempting to argue with her further, I decided to hear her out.
Despite the magical bond that linked us to one another, our relationship was still just like any other, ordinary partnership and if it was going to remain healthy, neither of us could afford to try and overpower the other. Luckily, I at least knew that much.
"I've been thinking about getting a job." The moment I saw her expression shift to one of determination, I knew that I lost completely.
She was going to get herself a job no matter what I said to her, so I decided to concede defeat and perform a little damage control, "Alright, go ahead, but only up until I get strong enough to bring in a steady income from the dungeon." I advert my eyes as I added, "A divine being shouldn't be forced to work some human job just to feed their child."
"Ah! I'd knew you understand!" My kami-sama flashed me a bright smile that forced a smile of my own to grow on my lips. There was just something about seeing her act like herself again after a stint of seriousness that just forced a wave of comfort over my body. "You won't regret this, I swear!"
"'Regret this'?" I can't help but flash a smirk at the goddess sitting besides me. "Why would I regret anything? In this situation, either I get you to work for my food, or I get to be right. Either way I win."
"Mou…" Ah, she was pouting again. Good to know we were back to our relationship's default setting. All of that serious air was starting to get to me. "You were being so cute earlier when you were trying to act like you didn't care," she whined, "why'd you have to ruin it by suddenly becoming a creep, again?"
Her whining only made my smirk grow even larger.
"Yeah, yeah, whatever you say, kami-sama." You calling me a tsundere, woman? Ha, Hilarious~. "I'll see you later."
Hm, I wonder if that would raise or lower my stock with the readers of this shitty light novel?
So, all of that happened.
Y'all like what you see? I personally think that I made Hikki a bit too goofy in places, but what do you guys think?
Also, apologies for all of that exposition to begin the chapter, but trust me, that's as large as its going to get for a long while.
: Would you really want to live in the Berserk universe? No, of course not. That's because you're not a suicidal idiot.
: Broken Matt Hardy's catchphrase.
: A dig at one of my favorite anime series: Code Geass.