Hallo! Guess what? UPDATE ! This chapter is unusually long and it was supposed to be longer. I was quite surprised myself when I check the number of words!

Now, to answer your questions: Lady is not OC. I personally don't like them and rarely use them myself (besides some side no name characters like shop keepers). I use 'Lady' instead her name to make her more mysterious. It's a nickname for her. Oh, and thanks, XOXO. You made my day !

Oh and review more... I need your love, my lovely readers *makes puppy eyes*

Enjoy~ !

Chapter 5: MAD WOMAN!

Sanji was in the kitchen and peeling potatoes. He was trying to focus on cooking but he couldn't stop his mind from wondering what the hell was going on. For some unknown reason, he appeared in the future and not just any future! Apparently, in 13 years, his 'dearest' siblings lost their titles as royals and Germa disappeared from Earth for good. To be fair he did feel some sort of feeling of justice but at the same time, he pitied them. He could saw in their eyes how hard it was for them and how not used to it they were.

"Auc!" he hissed in pain when he wounded his finger with the knife he was holding.

He frowned. He shouldn't think about such things when he's cooking. Shitty geezer always said not to.

Not like anything was working. At the very beginning of this adventure, he thought that he was dreaming... and that would explain a lot, but after getting 7th bruise he bore the thought of this being reality. But let's start from the beginning. It was March 26. Zeff woke him up in his usual way: kick in the head. Could someone remind him how he didn't lose all of his brain cells by now?

In a kitchen he greeted Patty and Carne:

"Yo, shitheads!"

"Stupid brat!"

"Shut up, bastard!"

"You three should be working!"

As always they had a lot of clients, but the routine was broken by some... Salty Strawberries Pirates? Seriously what was wrong with East Blue? Who normal eat strawberries with salt?! It was a waste of food! And who used such vulgar food as a pirate name?!

But let's go back to the story. They beat the guy up for trying to attack Baratie and wasting food. He sure was a weirdo... because Sanji could tell you that violet hair and a big strawberry costume was anything but normal! They fight for barely 10 minutes and kick the madmen into the ocean.

And that got him thinking. Reiju, his beloved sister, always told him that he was normal. That their brothers and she were the monsters. That they were different from regular humans like Sanji, but the more time he spent with Zeff he saw that wasn't true. Sure he was a kid, but every chief in the Baratie would say he was too strong for one.

You see, Sanji was trained by all of the cooks to not only become an awesome chief but also a fighter. Their restaurant was not a place for weak since it was constantly attacked by pirates. Hell, some marines were sometimes trying to blackmail them, because most of the workers were ex-criminals. For last three almost four years, he was trained to become one of them: a sea cook. He was mostly taught by Zeff himself, but not only. While he loved kicking people's buts... literally, he was perfectly aware that there were other important skills he needed. Jorden taught him how to navigate a little bit, Samson how to shoot and so one... He wasn't an expert in any of it, but know enough to survive if he was to be separated from others. He was really happy with them... but every time someone commented on his strength something jumped inside him.

He wasn't strong. He clearly remembered that he couldn't make even a scratch on his brothers... these bastards.

He was so lost in thoughts that he couldn't do a thing when suddenly Strawberry Weirdo, the only shithead left on the deck of Baratie, grabbed his leg and throw him into the ocean.

Then he felt as if he flew. He heard familiar shouts... or was it he? And then blackness.

He woke up when he felt some sort of stab. As is someone did something... but not to him... it was weird 'cuz it felt as if something happened to... Ichiji of all people. He heard some voices but didn't pay attention to them. He was in unfamiliar but nice place The room he woke up in was blue and maritime themed. He liked it. He put on clothes that were on the nearest chair and go to find the owner of a place and his saviour. He went downstairs only to see the weirdest thing... he ever saw.

Shitheads times two...

One of them were like 10 years older and other had dyed hair. The Ichiji-look alike become a tomato, Niji a peacock, Rei a flamingo and Yonji a marimo... Oh, and some of them were half-naked.

He blinked and rub his eyes but the weirdness of all hellholes didn't disappear and he didn't wake up in Baratie.

And after that, the carousel of fucked-up-ness went on. He had no clue how it was even possible, but he didn't care. He really was trying to avoid the shitheads, both older and dyed ones but it's clearly wasn't working and he already had a fight with them twice. This time there was no way he would let them do whatever they wanted. He could stand up for himself! He was a sea cook and there was no such thing that could make him back down!

Then way was he here cooking for this bastards?! They didn't deserve it!

He glared at peeled potatoes.

Why, when he heard marimo Yonji's stomach growl, the first thing that comes to his mind was to feed him? His brothers always laughed at him for cooking after all!

He sighed and checked how was the beef stew.

He couldn't get it! Why were these old morons nice to him?! Not like he wasn't happy that maybe in the future something changed but his instinct screamed not to trust them. He didn't want to suffer again. Where his own family would rather kicked him then hugged. While he told himself that he wasn't afraid of anything anymore besides starvation, deep inside he knew that what truly terrified him was a perspective of broken trust. If he will give them his trust and they will crash it, he would be truly broken.

Annoyed with his thoughts he started making dessert. He smirked as he saw what kind of food was left. You know what? He wasn't going to be the only one annoyed by the end of a dinner. Hey, it's not like he was going to make something horrible. He wouldn't waste food! But he'll make them understand some stuff about food!

But before that...

He took a knife and throw. The sharp tool pierced the door frame just above a small hand.

"WHAT THE HELL, BASTARD!" yelled Yonji as he drew back.

The door slammed open. His... oh he felt like puking every time he was about to think that... brothers were standing there with this ridiculous dyed hair and shitty grins on their identical faces... guess he had the same one. They were quadruplets after all... Back to the point, he could feel the trouble.

"What?! You're still doing such plebeian thing?" asked Niji with fake anger.

"Hell, you're even lower than before!" said Yonji and made a face of disgust.

"To think that your little brain thought that you're useful for anything." muttered Ichiji.

Sanji frowned and returned to work, completely ignoring the three princes.

"HEY!" they yelled. Of course, they were angry! Why was this guy treated so nicely by their older counterparts? What made him so... better?! He never was strong or fast! He couldn't swim for a long amount of time or jump like them. He was useless just like father said! What was that?!
Sanji rolled his eyes and looked at them coldly.

"What do you shitheads what?" he asked.

They opened their mouths but closed them after a second or two. They weren't sure why did they come here in the first place.

The third son of Vinsmoke family sighed.

"Was about to ask you... who's idea it was to dye your hair. You look like a bunch of freaks."

They stiffed.

You see, Ichiji, Niji and Yonji could with proud say that they were good boys and always listen to daddy, but... it started shortly after Sanji's death that now turned out to be disappearance. Father was so much rougher on them. Whatever they do it was never enough! It was like this for next over a dozen months. The dye incident was their first fight ever. It happened during their 12 birthday an almost month ago. Recently father was forcing them more and more, and all their fights ended the same: 'he is the correct one' and 'I think you don't want to end up like your brother' as he referred to the cage in which they had found Sanji once.

And so, now for past 25 days, their hair were dyed. They had no clue why. They still were a bit not used to it, but recently it became okay.

Now... They were pretty sure the instant change of their mood was all Sanji's fault. It was him who made them uncomfortable again. He sure does have the way of pissing them off!

"Shut up..." muttered Niji.

Sanji smirked as he started whipping milk for cream.

"Oh, so it was father." he said. His voice was a bit too happy, they decided. He definitely was enjoying their misery!

"Why you little..." yelled Yonji, but before he had a chance to end his sentence behind them appeared Niji's older counterpart.

The man only sighed.

"Can't you let him work in peace. It just so happens that I would like to eat something... eatable if he's here."

Sanji looked at him and smirked.

"You can't cook for shit, don't ya?"

"Something like that" he furrow "Especially Reiju... she's... no. I'm not talking about that." he shook his head. There was no way he was going to recall the incident. Nope! "She is forbidden to even came here. If you ever see her, doesn't matter which one, here, kick her out!"

Sanji raised his visible eyebrow.

"I'm not kicking women." he said casually. He started chopping fruits in front of him.

At first, Niji looked blankly at him. A moment later a devilish smirk appeared on his face.

"She's gonna waste food~ a lot of it~!" he said in a sing-song voice. A loud clang was heard as knife fall down on the floor. Sanji's hands were shaking a bit. He turned mechanically to face the man.

"After thinking about it... sisters are nor women, right?"

Niji only smiled brighter.

"Of course they are not." The man left taking three confused brothers with him. They still couldn't get it! Okey, they homeland... homeship, was no longer existing and in the eyes of law they were no longer royals, but they were still born as ones! Their brother, that black sheep of the family was bad enough! How could Niji's older self, of all people, allow that little piece of no good to do anything let alone cook?!

"Okey, kiddos. I need to move some stuff for Rei. Just sit here and stop causing trouble." he said as he left wherever he needed to be. The were left in living-room.

Niji only scowled at his older self. What was wrong with this guy?

"Okey, let's go back there and prank that little insolent twerp!" decided Yonji. Niji smirked. He was so into it!

"What about you, Ichiji?" they looked at the silent redhead. Their oldest quadruplet looked at them blankly.

"You know what? I'm going to find sis."

"Oh, come one!" winced Niji as he shook his blue head. "There is no fun with her. She is so... proper!"

"Well, aren't we all" asked Yonji as he tilted his head to a side. Yonji always liked spending time with his sister.

"I mean, not in front of father!"

"Oh... guess you're right."

To be fair, both Reiju and Ichiji rarely did any pranks with them, although their brother did it more often then sister. She always prefered to draw or read, while Ichiji trained all the time and learnt how to be good future king. Yonji liked pranks but also enjoyed spending time with Rei. He loved it when she read him. Niji was a prankster. If something happened in the castle, like for example explosion, it was his doing. Of course, in front of his father, he was a shining example of a good boy.

And there was also Sanji, the useless, good for nothing, unroyal-like, cooking loving coward that run away from their beloved floating kingdom. And because all of that Niji needed to teach him a lesson even if their older selves were hit in the head. Maybe he just needed to hit them again to stop this madness?
He will consider that after he takes care of that cooking lover!


Ichiji inhaled the salty smell of sea as he tried to calm down. When he was younger he liked to say that he didn't care about anything and you know what? It was mostly true. Ichiji cared about handful of things: his royal status, his father's rules and his family. Before they turned five and started their training he also cared about Sanji.

As a child, seeing Sanji as a weak human made him thought that hurting him was okay since that was what father said. After all, father was always right, right? It took him years and Tottland to finally understand that world wasn't black and white.

But he learned and he changed. Sure, it did was hard at first, especially for Niji and Yonji. Reiju was much better, but that's probably because she always knew how this story would end... Yet they could barely do anything. They lost their home, didn't have any money to survive, father was sent to Imple Up the Sky Prison and government was after their heads, but at least they were alive.

He was the leader and it was him who was suppose to look after others.

And they he started to care. His favourite 'This is me, caring...' become literal. He did stuff he never thought he would ever do. Everything for his family, because it was the last thing he had left.

And then Sanji appeared again. He had found them on Sabody Archipelago one year later. They wanted to climb the red line and hide in the Red Town, a city near Mariejois. People usually overlook places that are close to them. It was the beginning of their new life!

And it sure was. When Sanji appeared he was on the run. The crew was on their way to Fishman Island. Something was wrong with Mermaid Princess and because of that, the Yonko Black Beard was after her. Seeing them in an awful state they were in he decided to help them. He brought them on the deck of Thousand Sunny. Of course the Cat Burglar, Cotton Candy Lover and Straw Hat himself weren't pleased with Sanji's decision but in the end, they left Sabody and find a home on Sora Island in the New World.

He exhaled.

He felt calmer.


At the same time, his younger self was trying to find the flamingo girl.

"Rei?" Ichiji yelled her name. Where was his sister anyway? As he went upstairs he heard the loud 'BAM!'.

"Niji! Yonji! For the love of Blue, can't you do it gentler?"

Ichiji blinked. Since when his sister ever shout? Sure, she sometimes laughed loudly or yelled their names to find them in the castle, but never shout...


Inside the room, two brothers were helping their sister pack her paintings. Today was a very important event, the birthday of current Pirate King. All territories were overjoyed and all were organising parties. Here on Sora Island, the party was to be held at Knife's Edge Town. Because of that Reiju decided to sell some of her paintings.

"That's not my fault. That stuff is heavy!" yelled Niji.

"And you're superhumans!"

"Maybe we should all just calm dow-"

"Shut up, Yonji!"

They heard a knock. It sounded a bit stiff.

"Come in." they said in union. Although Reiju was still angry.

The red head of Ichiji's younger self leant up.

"Hey... Rei... do you know where my sis can be?" he asked a bit shyly as he saw his sister's older self's expression. "I looked for her but... can't find her..."

Reiju blinked at first. Who would have thought that her all 'this-is-me-caring' younger brother could be this cute!

"I sent her to the library. It's a bit soundproof so she probably didn't hear you." she told him "It's the last room on the left side."

The boy nod his head and disappeared with short 'Thanks!'

When the door closed behind him, Reiju fell on her knees, her face in hands. It looked kinda like out of manga.

"Why couldn't you stupid brothers, stay 12 forever..." she muttered.

"Wow, sister, yooooou're crazy!" said Yonji with a laugh.

Niji only shook his head.

"Oh, shut up, you both thought he was cute too!"

"Like hell!"

"Nah! Sorry, sister!"

She ignored them as she stood up and started talking to herself.

"I wonder if they will look cute in cat ears or dresses... or even maid outfit..."



It was probably the most terrifying thing he ever encouraged. He never saw his sister enraged. He immediately speeded up to the library. Oh, and he decided to ignore the cross-dressing part or he wouldn't be able to look at his sister the same ever again.

A/N: No I'm not going to make them cross-dress. I'm evil but not so much... Or I'll make an OMAKE... but only id you ask me! MWAHAHAHAHAHA!