For Better or For Worse

Cass and Lila A to Z. This was formerly posted on an old account of mine but I took it down from there. Now it will be posted here in it's entirety. Yes, it's complete. I'll add a few drabbles every couple days.

A – Affair

She hadn't set out to have an affair. But seeing Cass with Anne made Lila insecure and when Lila was insecure, she lashed out at the world in any way that she could. No one came out unscathed when Lila Roberts-Winthrop was on the warpath. She just wanted Cass to feel the pain he was dealing out to her when he would run to Anne for solace every time they didn't see eye-to-eye in their marriage. Sure, she didn't really believe that Cass was actually sleeping with the lookalike of his oh-so-wonderful and perfect Frankie but Cass and Anne were having an emotional fling in Lila's mind and that was enough to send her into the waiting arms of the once-again single, Matthew Cory – a man who had truly wanted her for so long. They had a little daughter together. It made sense for them to connect when nothing else in their world made sense.

B – Baby

She couldn't believe it but she was having a baby. And not just any baby – but most likely Matt's child once again. She had slept with Cass just the night before she had "reconnected" with Matt sexually but something told her that she was not going to get a happily ever after out of this with either man. She loved Cass with all of her heart but Matt had a hold on her too through Jasmine and maybe now this new kid of hers. In her heart of hearts though she couldn't deny that she wanted her child to belong to Cass, without any question. However when he found out there was a possibility that this child growing inside of her belly wasn't his, he would never get over it. He would never forgive her. What could she do now but lie?

C – Conceal

As her clothes got tighter and her moods more erratic, she realized she could not conceal her pregnancy for much longer. She was still trying to figure out a way to tell Cass that this baby was his when she wasn't absolutely sure that it was. She somehow felt she couldn't look into his beautiful brown eyes and tell him what she had done. But in the end, the choice was not up to her. Cass found her prenatal pills in her purse one day when he was looking for a mint. Likely story. She knew he had been onto her from the beginning and he had to be wondering why she had kept the truth about her pregnancy a secret for these three months.

"Why wouldn't you tell me you're pregnant?" Cass asked, looking at her with a lamenting expression in his eyes that nearly brought her to her knees.

"You and Anne –"

"Anne is leaving town," Cass said. "And you absolutely know there has never been anything between us."

"I am sorry but I didn't know that!" Lila spat, feeling so emotion whether from her pregnancy hormones or from her genuine guilt. "I thought because she reminded you so much of your precious Frankie that –"

"That I would leave you?" Cass asked. "You have to know that would never happen."

"Why because I'm your obligation? Your 'ol ball and chain?" Lila challenged him.

"No. Because I love you, Lila. You know that. I spent a lot of time with Anne, yes, but I sent her away because I realized how much it had to be hurting you… Now tell me why you tried to hide your pregnancy for so long?"

Lila had intended to lie to Cass but looking into his gentle, urging eyes she knew somehow that she couldn't do it. "Because, Cass, there's a good chance you're not this child's father."

Cass literally stumbled backwards in his shock and horror. He managed to catch himself on the edge of the sofa and her hands reached out to touch him but he was shooing them away. "No, don't, Lila. Don't. Just … Just tell me you're joking about this."

"Oh god that I could," Lila moaned as tears poured from her eyes.

"Well who's the lucky guy?" Cass snapped facetiously.

"It's Matt."

"Matthew Cory." It wasn't a question.

"Yeah," Lila admitted. "I'm so sorry, Cass. You know I love you –"

"Don't say that. Don't you dare say that after what you've done!" Cass thundered. "You went behind my back … You just broke my heart." She could see him trying to remain stoic but it wasn't working. His façade was slipping and quickly too.

"Cass, I love you. I still love you so much. But you were spending more and more time with that wench Anne and –"

"And it's no excuse. You know I would never sleep with her, unless you don't know me at all. Like I never knew you. Wait, that's wrong. I knew who you were from the beginning. I should have listened to my instincts and stayed away from your poisonous venomous self."

"Cass!" she cried but he was already marching out of the house and away from her, where she could never hope to reach him.

D – Docks

Cass ended up taking a walk on the docks at the lake, trying to rein in his emotions. He couldn't believe, for the life of him, that his wife – the woman he loved more than anything in the whole world – had gone behind his back with the man who had stood up for them at their wedding. Sure Lila and Matthew shared a connection through their three-year-old daughter but he never would have dreamt it could come to this. Not even in his worst nightmares, would he have imagined that.

A tear rolled down his cheek even as he willed himself not to care enough to cry. He was trying to shut off his feelings right now in regards to Lila but it wasn't working. He still loved her. He still wanted her. But she had betrayed him. He wasn't going to forgive her for this. He couldn't even as he longed to be the father of the baby she was carrying. But she had said there was a good chance he wasn't and that gave him every excuse in the world to divorce her.

E – Even

Cass avoided all of Lila's phone calls and even her visits during the next week. Finally he got on the phone and called her himself, only to bark at her that he wanted a paternity test done on the baby she was carrying.

A week later he found himself waiting at the hospital waiting to see John Hudson about getting an amniocentesis done. He paced the waiting room anxiously. That's when he spotted Lila and none other than Matt himself come walking in. He wanted to pounce on Matt and beat the tar out of him but resisted by sheer force of will. Instead he barked out, "What's he doing here?"

Matthew shook his head. "I'm sorry you found out about us the way you did, Cass, I really am; but this baby could easily be mine as well."

Cass shook his head and turned away as Lila tugged on his arm. "Cass, please don't be angry."

"How can you even ask me that?" Cass asked. "You slept with him and he may have gotten you pregnant." The thought that the baby his wife was carrying wasn't his pained him to the max. If only he could stop thinking of her as his wife …

"I know but we can work things out –"

Matt touched Lila's arm. "You want to work things out with Cass, Lila? Even after you turned to me more than once?"

Cass shouldn't have been surprised but he felt sucker punched just the same. "It wasn't a one-time thing I take it."

Lila shook her head as she cupped her little belly. "No, I'm afraid not. But Cass, I still love you. Just you." She looked at Matt as Cass refused to look at her. Her expression was pained as she whispered, "I'm sorry I put both of you through this."