Disclaimer: You know the drill
AN: The alternate endings some of you have been waiting for.
Shinji found himself wandering after school. Asuka was at Hikari's again and Misato had told him earlier that she would be working late. Because of this, Shinji didn't have to worry about preparing meals for everyone. Which was probably better; he didn't want to be around anyone at this moment. Unknown to him, his legs seemed to automatically carry him to the hill overlooking Tokyo-3. By the time he did notice, his pace slowed. He remembered the last time he was up here. With her... Looking up at the area, he was surprised to find a figure standing there already. As he moved closer, the person suddenly became very obvious.
"Ayanami? What are you doing here?"
The albino girl slowly turned her head toward him. The wind blew lightly through her azure hair as her crimson eyes looked at Shinji.
"I...do not know."
She looked back out into the scenery before quietly stating...
"But I knew you would come."
Shinji blinked. She...knew I would come here? I didn't even know. Shinji moved beside her and looked out as well. Even though the sun was still up on the horizon, the moon shone clearly above the city, making the already beautiful view majestic. Shinji found himself constantly looking over at the blue-haired beauty as she serenely watched the city. Just like a guardian angel, Shinji mused to himself. That would be the best way to describe her.
"I...remember this place."
Shinji's eyes widened with partial shock and he turned to her again. "You remember?"
Rei kept her gaze on the city, "Yes. I remember when you brought me up here." She refocused to the moon, "But I was...different. I was someone else."
Shinji looked away and gave a half whispered reply, "Tsunami."
Rei didn't respond, but kept staring at the moon. By now, the sun was almost down, letting the moon take its dominance over the night sky. Rei seemed entranced by it, almost thoughtfully.
"Ikari...Shinji. Did you mean it when you said that you loved me?"
Shinji's eyes widened again, probably more so than last time, "Uhh, no...I mean yes...I mean...uhhhh."
Shinji was stumped for an answer. But he was even more surprised when he heard a faint sound. Was Rei...giggling? He looked over at her, but whatever he heard was erased by her cool visage. Again, a period of silence.
"You loved...Tsunami." she said finally.
"Yes." he nodded.
"Yet, I was a part of her. Right?"
"...Yes." Where was she going with this?
Nodding at the answer, Rei suddenly moved in front of Shinji and took his arm before he could back away. Shinji was paralyzed as she smoothly turned around with her back leaning on him. Still holding his hand, she placed it across her body and held it softly. Shinji's face was becoming a tomato as she snuggled closer to him.
"It's okay. This is okay. I am a part of her, so this is okay."
Shinji blinked. He couldn't disagree with her logic, but he felt...strange. He was expecting to be a little more resistant to her advance; however he was calm about it. Comfortable even. Even more so, Rei had never been so bold as to do something like this. But then again, neither had he. Slowly, he began to relax and held on to her.
Another period of silence came over the two youths as they looked at the view once more. The sun was gone by now and the moon shone brightly over the now-lit city.
"If you want to, you can call me Rei instead."
"Only if you call me Shinji." However, he didn't have to ask that seeing as how she had called him that earlier. Nevertheless, she nodded in his embrace.
"Shinji. I am not Tsunami. But I still love you."
For the first time in a long while, Shinji smiled. He hadn't heard those words spoken to him in a long while. He was glad they had come from her. He held Rei tighter.
"Ai shiteru, Rei-chan."
A week later...
Asuka was sitting in the living room in front of her homework. Misato was working late again and Shinji was out with his friends, leaving the house pretty much to herself. However, she couldn't get started on the assignment. Her thoughts were waving back and forth, causing her to lose concentration. Everyone, besides Shinji and herself had noticed a change in Asuka's attitude since the Tsunami incident. She didn't appear to be as loud as before and whenever she did get into an argument, it never seemed like she was really into it. Shinji never noticed because he was still brooding over the loss of Tsunami while Asuka didn't notice because she had been trying to avoid it.
Asuka looked over and merely waved as Shinji entered the house, pretending to be focused on her work. However, that proved difficult to do as well. I can't hide it anymore.
"Shinji, could you come here for a moment?"
Shinji stopped short of going into his room and looked at Asuka cautiously. However, Asuka's eyes were still looking down at the paper. I...guess she needs my help, he thought nervously. Slowly, he moved over and sat down at the opposite end. He waited for one of Asuka's usual rants and raves, but surprising none came. Her eyes just kept looking down at the paper.
She didn't answer him and he was beginning to get worried. Finally, she spoke.
"Did...you mean what you said?"
"Mean what?" was the confused reply.
Asuka finally looked up at him and stared directly into his eyes. But it wasn't the spiteful look she usually gave. This one was eerily familiar to Shinji.
Shinji gasped in shock, "You...remember?"
She nodded, not taking her eyes off of him, "We both do. We just didn't want anyone else to know."
Shinji was still shocked by this. But then he remembered Rei's unusual attitude on the roof of the school a week ago.
"So that was why Ayanami was like that. She seemed...different."
Asuka kept up her stare. "Please answer the question."
Shinji was stuck. Not only was Asuka's gaze on him making him uncomfortable, but her entire personality seemed to have changed as well. He was used to the overbearing, loud Asuka. But this one was simply quiet and patient. Shinji had only seen that look twice. One was when she had first kissed him (Up until she shut his nose.) The other was when he was on that date...with Tsunami. But was this really Asuka? Or was she setting him up for another painful experience?
"Shinji, don't wuss out on me now. I know better."
Shinji blinked. It was definitely her alright. But should he risk it? Shinji finally decided to answer. If she does set me up, well at least let it be the whole truth. It may not hurt as much.
"You want an answer. Fine. Yes, I did mean it. But I meant it for Tsunami."
Asuka looked away, "I...see."
Shinji blinked again. That was it? She must have really been honest. Oh, god. What have I done?
"I know, Shinji. You weren't sure. You were just being honest with me."
She stood up, head still looking away. "I guess I deserve it, after all I put you through."
Shinji merely sat quietly, listening to the German girl's words. He had never seen her like this before. She was...opening up.
"Shinji. I know I don't deserve to ask this. I practically put you through hell ever since I met you. But you never fought back. You just accepted me...no matter what I did. I didn't know how to react to that, so I just kept going. I didn't know how to deal with it. Until...Tsunami."
Shinji continued to listen.
"When I was joined with Wonder...Ayanami, it felt like I was someone else. I was the same, but I saw myself doing things I never thought I could. Things...I sometimes wish I did." Asuka sat back down, "I...I'm sorry, Shinji. I'm sorry for everything I've done to you."
Shinji couldn't believe what he was seeing. Yet, he knew this was true. It was this part of Asuka that he saw in Tsunami. The scared little girl that was afraid to be alone. Asuka continued to look down and her eyes threatened to release tears.
No, I will not cry in front of him.
She was so determined to hold her tears back that she failed to notice that Shinji had raised from his seat and came over to her. When she did notice, he was sitting right beside her, hands on his lap. Slowly, she looked up at him and their eyes locked once more.
"Ai shiteru, Asuka."
The tears broke out, but not out of sadness.
"Heh, look what you made me do, baka. I told myself I wouldn't cry and here I am. Just had to be you."
Shinji calmly placed a hand on his cheek, much to Asuka's surprise. Slowly he wiped away as many of the tears as he could. Asuka felt his warm palm on her cheek and closed her eyes briefly. When she opened them, Shinji's lips were connected with hers in a light, feathery kiss. She didn't know how he did that or when, but she didn't care either. Too suddenly, Shinji broke away from her and Asuka let of a smile to which Shinji returned.
"I knew you had a spine somewhere in there."
"And I knew you had a heart."