This is agony.
Never in my life have I ever experienced this kind of pain.
I always thought that my own transformation was the worst pain I could ever feel, but I was wrong. Sitting here while my love writhes in pain on the bed that we have made love on so many times before, there can be nothing worse than this. Since I first learned that I could see and hear Bella's thoughts, it's always been a gift. She has an amazing mind and I love having that insight to her. Right now it is pure hell. The pain is bad enough, but the fact that she is my mate and there's nothing I can do to stop it, makes it worse. She has been changing for 3 days and according to Alice, she only has an hour or so left.
It's been two years since I proposed to Bella in our little Alaskan cabin, and it's been the best two years of my life.
We both graduated high school with honors, and I'll never forget Bella's face when Charlie stood up in the crowd on graduation day clapping for her with tears falling from his eyes. After graduation we stayed around Forks for another year. Bella took some online literature classes while planning our wedding, and completed her first two semesters of college. She plans to go back once she has her newborn thirst under control.
We were married on June 8th in my parent's backyard where we've played football so many times. Bella and Alice made the backyard into a fantasy world and it was perfect. My mate was breathtaking as she came down the aisle dressed in all white with a smile that lit up her whole face. For our honeymoon, I took Bella on a tour of Europe. I want to show her the world, and that is where we decided to start. She was able to see all of the things and places she had always dreamed of, and I loved watching her do it. Once we returned from our honeymoon, she moved into the big Cullen house for a month as we prepared to move. Charlie thinks that we are going to be attending the University of Alaska, and we might someday. We are all hoping that once Bella has overcome her newborn emotions, she will be able to talk to Charlie on the phone and possibly even video chat. It's up to Bella whether she will ever see him again in person; it would be very tricky and she may want to give him closure by faking her death rather than dragging him along through her journey.
We came back to our cabin in Alaska for Bella's change per her request. Carlisle is here with me but that's it. Bella was very specific about the circumstances of her change. She didn't want to put any of the others through the pain of watching her change, especially Jasper. Carlisle is here in case we are both needed to contain her. With her newborn strength, she will be stronger than I am.
I'm broken out of my memories when Bella's steady heart skips a beat. It's been steadily slowing down since I bit her days ago. Carlisle's hand on my shoulder alerts me of his presence before he speaks.
"It shouldn't be long now."
He must be speaking aloud for Bella's benefit.
I've never been this anxious in my life as I listen to my love's heart continue to slow until it gives one last deep thump and goes quiet. Standing slowly, I watch as Bella's red eyes open for the first time.
Her eyes lock onto mine and I finally find the breath to speak.