"MERCY! I swear this time I'm re—" The young brunette skidded to a stop in front of the desk, "Wait, who are you, love?

"I'm Jocelyn. Ms. Ziegler is out sick today so I'm covering for her."

"Ahh, alrighty then! I'm Lena Oxton or Tracer if you prefer." She grinned, bouncing on the balls of her feet. "Is Mercy doing okay or is she just knackered of us?"

"No, she just had a bad stomach bug and thought it would be better if she stayed at home today." Jocelyn's eyes drifted down to her copy of substitute's notes, "She'll likely be back on her feet by tomorrow."

If Lena comes by, tell her that her hair is perfectly fine, no gray hairs whatsoever.

"That's great!" Lena's eyes brightened suddenly, "Actually, a second opinion would be good because Mercy always sa—anyway! Can you check my hair, love?"

"Why?" Jocelyn gave her an apprehensive look, "Did you get something stuck in it?"

"No, it's just, I have a temporal distorter. I blink around a ton and I swear it's aging me prematurely. I have gray hairs!"

Keeping Mercy's instructions in mind, Jocelyn motioned for Lena to bend her head forward. The girl's hair was dark brown with highlights of auburn, raised up in playful tufts. "No gray hairs whatsoever, Ms. Oxton, your hair is perfectly fine.

"I swear Mercy has said the same exact thing to me before, ever get that feeling of deja vu?—Wait, is that the time? I'm late for shift! Cheers, love! " Lena gave her a quick salute and blinked out of the clinic office.

Jocelyn scratched her head in confusion and turned back to her substitute's notes for references.

When S76 comes, recharge his helix rockets and tactical visor. He will be squeamish without the visor so give him the Hello Kitty sunglasses to wear while the visor charges. If he starts muttering he isn't a hero anymore, grab my caduceus staff, lean over the counter menacingly, and tell him that you would be more than happy to show him that heroes never die. Brandish the staff wildly until he shuts up.

At noon, McCree will come in. Hide.

The Shimada's therapy session is at 2pm. Make sure they drop off their weapons with you - Genji will have one shuriken up his left sleeve. Take them to Enclosure C, activate the barrier force, and let them talk for an hour. Only intervene if you get the safe word: bootylicious.

"Hey, where's Mercy?" An teenage girl frowned, tapping her fingers impatiently on the counter. A large mech followed her, twitching every so often and flashing red lights.

"She's out sick today, I'm her substitute. What can I help you with?" Jocelyn tried not to stare too much.

"My mech's been nerfed. Again." She rolled her eyes, blowing a bubble with her gum. "I need it repaired asap."

"Okay, I'll submit a work order for it. What's your name?" Jocelyn began filling out the form, casually reaching for her notes.

" ." The girl flashed her a peace sign, smiling cheekily.

"And have you tried fixing the mech yourself? Any ideas what the problem is?" Jocelyn asked, glancing at the instructions for . If 's mech is broken, submit a work order and leave the mech in one of the back rooms. Do not attempt to fix by yourself because it could explode. Also, make sure she doesn't see my Doritos stash.

"All systems checked out but it's still flashing that light, so I thought Mercy or Torbjorn could take a look."

"Okay, I'll leave her the form for when she gets back."

"Thanks!"

As the girl leaves, Jocelyn walks around to the front of the desk and gives the mech a tentative nudge. It jerks to life and takes shuddering steps towards the back of the work unit, its massive frame lurching forward and knocking down trays of papers and pens as it scrapes past. Jocelyn bit back a curse and bent to pick up the mess, glaring at the now stationary mech and wondering if it could actually explode.

"Hey there darling, need a hand?"

The rich southern drawl sent a shiver down her spine and she straightened immediately to find a handsome man in cowboy leathers.

"Huh ho, excuse me. Didn't mean to startle you." He smiled lazily, "I heard Mercy wasn't in today, do you need any help?"

She glanced at the mech, "Actually, 's mech is giving me a bit of trouble. Could you help me move it to the back rooms?"

"No problem, darling." He walked over and picked up the mech, carrying it quickly into the back. Jocelyn's gaze caught on his metal arm and she quickly followed to show him the room.

He heaved it inside and dusted off his hands, "Like shooting fish in a barrel."

"Thank you…Err, I'm so sorry, what's your name?" Jocelyn asked embarrassedly.

"The name's McCree." He tipped his hat and smiled charmingly. "But you can call me Jesse."

McCree…McCree? Noon? Jocelyn glanced down at her watch just as it struck noon. She looked up at him and slowly drew back in horror.

McCree's eyes had gone dilated and predatory, his fingers twitching to the peacekeeper in his holster. "It's high noon."

Jocelyn blacked out.

When she finally drifted back to consciousness, she was in pain and vaguely aware of something splashing her face gently. She opened bleary eyes and coughed.

"Oh thank the Lord." McCree grasped her hand.

An older woman with the eye of horus tattooed on her face leaned in and swatted McCree's hand away. She pressed her palm to Jocelyn's forehead and smiled encouragingly, "I've seen worse, you're going to live."

Jocelyn managed to sit up and look around her. She was in one of the examination rooms, laid out with a warm blanket around her. "W-what happened?"

"He let his high noon loose on you. If the mech hasn't automatically activated its defense matrix, you would have died and we would've really needed Mercy." The old woman glared at McCree.

"I-I have a…problem with impulse control." McCree lowered his gaze, "I do hope you'll forgive me, darling."

"Heh, you always were a charmer." The woman scolded before turning back to Jocelyn, "Here, take your medicine."

Jocelyn found herself once again drenched, the biotic grenade working its way into her system like a jolt of espresso. She straightened and smiled, "Thanks Ms…?"

"Call me Ana." The woman smiled, "And Tracer tells me you're Jocelyn. Thank you for covering for Mercy today. I'll take this boy out of your hair and let you get on with you day."

McCree tipped his hat with a sheepish smile before Ana dragged him off. Jocelyn stared apprehensively at the doorway before climbing out of bed. Besides a bit of fatigue, she felt fine and she patted the mech fondly before returning to her post.

The next hour was relatively calm. When she heard "Fire in the Hole", she ran to lock the ward doors and waited under the desk as the instructions said.

At 2pm, she looked up to find a serious-looking Asian man and a green and chrome cyborg ninja approaching the front desk. Their whispered argument halted as they looked at her in surprise.

"I'm Jocelyn, I'm subbing for Mercy today. Are you the Shimada brothers?"

"Well I wouldn't say—" "Yes, yes we are." "Stop cutting me off." "I don't have to listen to you." "Respect your elders."

Jocelyn cleared her throat, "Okay, well I just need both of you to give me your weapons first."

"You know I'm only doing this so HQ will get off my back." A bow and quiver hit the counter. "Forget HQ, Rein is breathing down my neck to get this sorted out." A sword. A dozen shuriken.

"Umm, Genji? One more please."

The ninja scowled but dropped the last shuriken on the counter.

"Thank you." She forced a smile and led them to Enclosure C, ushering them inside before acting the force barrier, which thankfully included soundproofing the glass room. She briefly wondered how they would tell her the safe word if the room was muffled, but if Mercy didn't say anything about it…

When she returned to her desk, she was aware of a shadow rippling in the corner and she stared wide eyed as it coalesced into a hooded figure wearing a skull mask.

"Who are you? Where is Mercy?" He had a gravelly deep voice that tempted Jocelyn to give him a cough drop.

"She's out sick today, I'm Jocelyn. What can I help you with?"

He was silent for a long time before finally admitting, "…I'm here for my gun lesson."

"Oh, are you Reaper?" She picked up her notes and scanned for his instructions. Reaper might be coming for a practice session with gun reloading. Take him to the back and show him how to reload a gun. Be patient with him. If he gets frustrated, he'll start dancing in a circle with guns out yelling die die die. Run and hide.

"Yes, Death walks among you." He intoned.

"Ummm okay. Let's go to the back."

"Repositioning." He disappeared in a slow spiral of smoke and reappeared in the back room, a mere five feet away.

Jocelyn sighed and walked over. He handed her a gun and she demonstrated how to reload it. He held his other gun and tried to mimic her actions, unsuccessfully. After the fifth try, she heard the front door open and she headed back out to see a white-haired man with a red glowing visor.

"You must be Soldier 76." She greeted, "I'm Jocelyn, I'm subbing for Mercy today."

"Is Angela alright?" He demanded.

"Yes, just a stomach bug. She'll be back tomorrow probably."

"Oh that's good." He smiled, "I need to recharge my helix rockets and my tactical visor."

Jocelyn opened the desk drawer and found the bright pink Hello Kitty sunglasses, trying not to laugh as she handed them to him.

He grimaced, turning red, "Can you look away?"

"Oh sure." She closed her eyes, hearing the clunk of the helix rockets and the visor being set down on the counter.

"Okay, done." He said gruffly.

She looked up and couldn't contain her giggles, "You look great."

"Hng. Get on with it."

She picked up rockets and visor and headed to the charging equipment in the back rooms. Soldier 76 moved to follow her but he stopped short when he saw Reaper sitting on the floor with a small mountain of guns.

"Aren't you supposed to be dead?" 76 shouted.

"Didn't take." Reaper chuckled. "But the reckoning draws near."

"I didn't start this war but I'm damn well going to finish it." 76 raised his gun.

Tendrils of smoke rose from Reaper and he began spinning with guns outstretched.

"Get over here and heal up!" 76 shouted at Jocelyn, activating a biotic field. After a few minutes of Reaper missing his shots and 76 firing at Reaper's wraith form, they both paused to reload. Jocelyn scrambled to grab the caduceus staff from the front desk and she turned to wave it menacingly at both of them.

"If you two don't sit down and chill out, I'm going to write Mercy a note about what happened here." She threatened. To her surprise, both of them backed away and retreated to opposite corners of the room to sulk. Sighing in relief, she started recharging the helix rockets and noticed Enclosure C was emitting some blue and green light. Three dragons were circling overhead the Shimada brothers and Genji was pressing his rear to the glass wall. Ahh, bootylicious.

Within the hour, all four men were finally gone and Jocelyn sank into her chair with a sigh. Honestly, how does Mercy handle all of this?

The front door slid open and an omnic floated through. "Greetings. Peace be upon you."

"Hello. How can I help yo—" Her eyes widened and she grinned, the happiest she felt all day - this one she knew without needing to read her instructions. She reached out and took the orbs one by one, placing them into the machine. Beep. Beep. Beep. Beep. Beep. Beep. DaDun DaDun DaDun Dun!

The omnic bowed as she handed the orbs back, "You have my thanks. The Iris embraces you."

She smiled and waved as he left, happy that her shift was finally over. She headed to the back rooms to change from her Overwatch attire into her nurse uniform, tucking her pink hair back into pigtails and pinning her nametag on. Kudos to Mercy for handling all these crazies, I can't wait to fly back to Kanto.