Coleiosis Productions presents…
PlayStation All-Stars Christmas 2016
This is perhaps the chance to bring back to life the longest-running fan service! Brought to you by a reunited team…but with more!
Cole Bezotte, the master!
Wendy Bezotte, the mother!
Forrest Eaton, the perfect pal!
Sofie Spangenberg, the good gal!
It was November 2013. I had written my first Coleiosis Christmas special, which I now think is too intense. After all, that was during the time of the original cancelled series. Then the next year, 2014, it was merely a spinoff to announce the story "Shattered Innocence" which I gladly put into the reboot series. And THEN, in 2015, Super Sonic Squad was given its very own and very first Christmas special, which I reread recently that thought that I still did such an amazing job on it. But, like they say in that old song, "Christmas future is far away, Christmas past is past, Christmas present is here today, bringing joy that will last."
What does that mean? It means that 2016 cannot go by without a Coleiosis Christmas special. And that's what I am giving you all right here and now. But to add to the greatness, I will add in the greatest OC ever made, Donna the Lombax! But what will her story be in this holiday tale? We shall all read for ourselves. I hope you enjoy it!
Just like last year's holiday special, this story has no proper title
We usually start the story with the main protagonists, but this time we are doing something different. Perhaps it would be better to start the show off with what the villain is up to, and so we shall give you the activity of the killer clown Needles, also known as Sweet Tooth. At the market known as Ridgepoint Centre, he snuck behind a checkout aisle to see the commotion that was going on. And there he saw a large crowd of children gathering around a throne, where a large man seated upon it.
"So the fat man decides to finally show himself after all!" Needles thought silently, keeping his presence a secret. "Honestly, I don't look as bad as him…" But suddenly, he easily recognized the voice of the mascot. He took a closer look and noticed a big chin underneath the fake white beard. "That's no Santa Claus!" Needles hissed. "It's that no-good Captain Qwark! He can't get away with being a fake!"
But no one else ever cared. They just thought that Captain Copernicus Leslie Qwark did an amazing job portraying Santa Claus because of his deep voice and large shape. "Ho, ho, ho!" Qwark laughed in his deep voice.
"Bah!" Needles thought as he exited the store. "Why must Christmas be the best time of every year? I HATE Christmas! It's that time of year where I feel very unhappy! I just want to take a cake-slicing knife and butcher everyone I see! Bah, humbug! But wait… Who in this world does NOT celebrate Christmas? Perhaps there is one particular person who I overlooked…"
And it was at the League of Heroes' Mansion that he did his inspection. He observed the activity of those who live to fight evil and protect the universe from all dangers. It was there that Needles noticed the happiness that erupted throughout the house: Nathan Drake and his wife Elena planning a vacation to Paris, Sackboy using his Poppit to decorate the Christmas tree, and the girls improving their holiday image.
"It looks too happy for now…" Needles thought. "But there is still something missing. Where is she…?"
He did not think of Pupuru, because he already knew that she was happy and full of joy and warmth. However, Pupuru did not feel COMPLETELY satisfied; one particular Lombax refused to take part in the celebration. Alone in the guest room, Donna sat upon the firm bed, beginning her private moment of allowing tears to fall from her eyes. As a child, she had a very bad history of this holiday; there was an awful moment that she had kept as a secret to herself. No one knew why she really hated Christmas; but they never bothered to ask, as they feared that Donna would go berserk like she had done that horrible day in the past.
"Well…" Donna sighed. "Another year, another sad time for me. I don't know how everybody won't have some sort of disaster… Why must it only come to me?"
"So she's the one…" Needles thought, looking through the window. "She must be the ONLY one. She has no Christmas spirit in her… no joy, no excitement… I have never seen her like this before, since our last encounter…
"I remember it so well… I toyed with her, and I teased her… Oh, boys and girls! She was delightful! But she was a fighter! That stupid girl! She actually hurt me! That screwdriver she just so happened to find… she hurt my eye with it! Flung it straight at me like a trained archer, without regrets. How long has that been…? And I still think about her… and I still crave her screams… and her death!
"She needs to be gutted! I'll make her Christmas ruined forever, as her whole life comes to its very end! This is one holiday I'll ruin!" But suddenly, right after Needles was done talking, he felt something pour down upon his head. He noticed snow come down off his body; he looked up and saw Sly Cooper sweeping the thick snow off the top balcony.
"Stupid raccoon!" Needles hissed. "He doused the fire off my head! Suddenly, I feel different. It's as if the Spirit of Evil had left me… That fire was a trademark of mine! It's gone now, perhaps due to this very cold feeling I have received. I feel helpless… but I still want to kill Donna! I'll be back… when the time is right, on Christmas Eve!"
Inside the mansion, no one noticed the villainous clown stalking away from Midtown Suburbs. They continued to go about their business, carrying on with the usual holiday tradition. After putting the finishing touches to the Christmas tree, Sackboy admired it in all its bright beauty. "You did a very good job on it…" Ratchet spoke to him, patting him on the head. "So I'll accept it as our official Christmas tree for this year. If only Donna was here to see this…"
"What's the matter?" Sackboy asked in reply.
"She really hates Christmas… She told me so herself."
"But why? Doesn't she like playing in the snow and exchanging gifts?"
"She used to as a little kid. But after something horrible happened during her time living with Christa and her family, she started to hate this holiday. I'm not sure you would want to hear the whole story."
"She's been sad about it all this time?"
"I'm afraid so…"
"She needs something to cheer her up. I'll give her some sweet treats."
"Don't regret what you're going to do…"
"I promise I won't…"
A few minutes later, Donna heard a knock at the guest room door. She opened it to see Sackboy standing right in front of her, and holding a miniature basket full of swirly lollipops and candy canes of every brand: Jolly Rancher, Hershey's, Starburst, and even SweetTarts. "I heard you were feeling sad…" Sackboy spoke to her. "So I brought you this to cheer you up. Merry Christmas, Donna."
Donna was at first speechless; though this was an act of kindness, she still hated this holiday. Her mind went back and forth as to say something. Suddenly, her words came pouring out: "Sackboy… I really appreciate you coming to me with something nice. But you misunderstand, I still hate Christmas. Thank you anyway; but as long as Christmas comes every year, I'm NEVER happy."
Sackboy's face dropped; a sad expression was displayed on the poor fellow. He had done his best to bring Donna joy, but it never worked. "Well…" Sackboy sighed, disappointed. He walked away, back down the stairs to the living room. And for a moment, Donna felt pity for him.
"At least he tried well…" she thought, closing her door.
Ratchet watched Sackboy walked towards him in a state of depression. "So it didn't work?" he asked him.
"It didn't…" Sackboy sadly replied. "Why did she do that? I gave her lollipops and candy canes, and so she just puts me away like that! She's not a very good friend!"
"I'm sorry, little guy, but that's the way she is every Christmas. Or at least that's what she tells me. You're still a good friend to have around, though."
Finally, on Christmas Eve, the most uneventful moments happened at Ridgepoint Centre. Captain Qwark was again dressed as Santa Claus, and things were going quite smooth until a big incident happened. The infamous Dr. Nefarious chose to crash the fun as Qwark had some kids sit on his lap and tell him what they wanted for Christmas. The vengeful scientist brought his trusty Sheepinator and terrorized the children by turning them into sheep. Qwark right away brought himself into action, removing his fake beard and meeting Nefarious in close-quarters combat.
The battle did not last long though; the security eventually arrived at the scene to see Qwark holding the Sheepinator in his hands, along with a little metal scrap from Nefarious' back. "Did you just…?" one of the guards spoke.
"No, wait!" another one interrupted. "If he's holding that robot scrap, then some other cybernetic guy is the culprit. But what about the kids?"
"Don't worry…" Qwark sadly replied. "In about an hour, the effects of the Sheepinator will wear off. But it's getting late now. I think my work here is done…" And with a sad face, he dropped the machine and walked out of the store slowly.
"That was awful…!" he thought aloud to himself, dragging his feet through the snow. "How many children do I have to save to become a hero again? I wasn't prepared for something like this!" In a fit of self-pity, his right hand hit a bag of empty tin cans. A cat jumped out of that dark alley, avoiding getting pummeled by the large sack that fell to the snowy street.
Suddenly, something stopped Qwark from walking any further. He heard the sound of jingle bells behind him, tempting him to turn around and see what was happening. Nothing was there, nothing except the fallen bag. But he took a closer look to find an exciting surprise; the bag was no longer filled with cans, but now with wrapped gifts of all shapes and sizes. He was at first eager to find one that had his name on the tag, but he then thought of a better idea. Quickly, he carried the bag of presents over his shoulder, put his fake beard back on, and ran throughout the streets of the busy city, handing the gifts out to the children who came by.
"Ho, ho, ho!" Qwark exclaimed loud enough for all to hear. "Merry Christmas!"
That night, Ratchet and the rest of the League of Heroes were invited to a Christmas Eve service held at Jebidiah's church. Immediately after reading it, Ratchet looked up the stairs to see if Donna was still in the guest room. She was, just sitting on her bed, waiting for it all to be over.
"She won't even hear out the good preacher," Ratchet thought, getting his coat. "I hear he's got some words of wisdom. By the way, what's taking Pupuru so long?"
And up in that guest room, Pupuru sat next to Donna and asked her the question; the one question that made Donna expose the whole truth so no one would be left in confusion and mystery anymore (including you readers): "Please tell me… Why do you hate Christmas so much?"
Donna sighed, then replied softly: "You're the last person in the universe to ask me that. But because you're very patient…and I like you as a friend, I will tell you all. It started many years ago; I was a little kid, living with my guardian family on the planet Rilgar. It was Christmas Eve, and I was waiting for a friend of mine to come join in on the festivities. But he never came, which made me very worried, because we had saved a couple of presents especially for him.
"Christmas Day had passed by, but there was still no sign of him. I had even tried calling him a few times, but he never answered. But then, one day, a rotten smell began to fill the house. We soon traced it to the chimney, and looked up to see a corpse. The fire department came to fish it out; it was my friend…dressed as Santa Claus, and with a sack of wrapped gifts. He planned on coming down the chimney on Christmas Eve to join in on the celebration. But as he was quietly coming down, he slipped and broke his neck.
"Throughout the years, I've been hating Christmas more and more. I've suffered from colds and flu… even a hypothermia, which I'll thank Ratchet for saving me from it. This holiday has been nothing but trouble. I just can't enjoy it anymore…"
Pupuru placed a gentle hand on Donna's shoulder. "I'm sure these things don't happen on purpose," she said. "I felt this way when I first met Ratchet, and he brought me here. I thought I was going absolutely insane, because it reminded me so much of my dream. We just have to open our eyes and see what's REALLY happening… find the truth behind it all…"
"If only I can believe what you're saying," Donna replied.
"I have to go now. I'll see you later tonight."
As Donna watched Pupuru leave the room, some heavy thinking began to swirl through her mind. It immediately got her attention, as she continued to sit there alone, and without pause to her thoughts. "Suddenly…" she thought, "…something's tugging at me."
Within a few minutes, the rest of the group arrived First Church of Cyburbia. The preacher Jebidiah warmly welcomed them without any further hesitation, then led them to their reserved seats. "May the 25th never be forgotten…" he spoke consistently. "For it is the day our Savior was born."
Ratchet looked ahead of himself and noticed two other spots in the pew he and the others sat at. "I really wish Donna was here," he thought silently, his expression displaying gloom. "But where is Captain Qwark? What is he up to?"
A long distance away, a mysterious ice cream truck turned around and headed straight towards the League of Heroes' mansion at high speed. "Good!" the driver Needles thought. "Now that the others are gone, I can focus on my main target. I really wish I had the Spirit of Evil back; it's what keeps me not only warm, but stronger! I know the Spirit of Christmas is not with Donna, so that will make it almost a fair fight for me…"
Back at the mansion, Donna's thoughts continued to rage on inside her weary head. She became very wishy-washy, not knowing what else to do; either she would continue the way she was, or she would turn from her dark ways and put herself in the light. "Pupuru says she knows what I'm going through," Donna thought out loud. "Be she and I are too different. What's in it for me? Am I making a big mistake?"
"It's not all your fault," suddenly spoke a voice from behind. "I'm sure of it…"
Knowing that voice, Donna turned to see who it was that spoke. She became very shocked to see her guardian mother Christa standing right there in the room with her. "How are you here?" she exclaimed.
"Hey!" Christa replied. "I can't leave my little girl alone on Christmas. I just decided to drop by for a while."
"I'm not a little girl anymore… But I really appreciate you coming here."
"I've been seeing you in pain every time this holiday came around. Where did your joyful heart go? Even though that incident happened many years ago, that does not mean you'll have to hate Christmas for the rest of your life."
"I'm sorry, but it's something I can never forget. It's just left me so…"
"…traumatized?" Christa finished for her.
"What makes you so sure?" Donna replied.
As Christa explained all, Needles had arrived at the door of the mansion, eager to put his dark plan into action. He stalked towards the doorknob, reaching for it with determination. But he suddenly felt himself falling upon the sidewalk, having slipped on the welcome mat. He looked down to see that Sackboy had placed some marbles underneath the mat, causing Needles to lose his footing.
"So they were prepared for me!" he hissed as he stood back up. "This is starting to make me angry!"
Back inside, Donna listened intently on what Christa was saying, understanding how Christmas is also a holiday to warm one's heart and help others feel loved as they treat each other with kindness and care. "But don't people do that EVERY day?" Donna asked after hearing all.
"They do," Christa answered in reply. "But Christmas really helps. Though it only comes once a year, it provides an example for us to follow, as we realize how much our friends need us and love us. Throughout the years when you were living with us, we wanted you to know that we would do anything to keep you in safety and in good care. We wanted you to know how much we love you. Your group of friends may be doing the same today…"
Donna felt a tear form in her right eye. Christa was right. "Why did I not listen to you?" she whimpered.
Outside the mansion, Needles looked up at the window, seeing what Donna was doing. He did not hear anything due to the window being completely shut and locked to keep the cold out. "I don't know what she's doing up there…" he muttered, "…but I've got to get to her before the others make it back."
But everything changed once he gripped the doorknob. Once he opened the door, he suddenly felt a blast of heat coming at him. It was not only the heat fans around the house, but it was also the blowtorch that was tied to the door. A string pulled at the torch's trigger, which shot a stream of violently blazing fire. Needles screamed as he felt the fire pelt his head. But he then stopped, as his thoughts began to overtake him: "The curse… I can feel it again! The Spirit of Evil is back! I feel like myself once again! Boys and girls, Needles is BACK!"
Then, with one shove, he knocked the blowtorch off the door and started heading for the stairs. "I'm coming for you, you freak!" he shouted.
Donna heard the noise that was going on down there. "He's after me!" she exclaimed.
"Then this is your chance," Christa replied, placing her right hand upon Donna's left shoulder. "You still have time to make things right with yourself. You fight evil in the name of justice and freedom, and I am proud of you for that. Perhaps this chance will give you back your Christmas Spirit, so you know you're doing this for your friends, even us. You know you defend the universe because you love your friends. You can't resist protecting them from any evildoer, like that clown freak downstairs."
"Somehow… I feel a change… I feel as though I must do this!"
"That's my girl!"
Donna turned to thank Christa for the words of wisdom spoken. But she saw that Christa was gone; she had disappeared from sight. "Was I imagining it?" Donna spoke to herself. "Well, hallucination or not, this taught me a valuable lesson…"
She opened the door and went to the top of the flight of stairs, looking downward to see Needles slip on some toy cars that were set at the bottom. "This is your worst excuse of a trap yet!" he shouted. "These are Twisted Metal cars you're using!"
"I didn't set these traps…" Donna replied with a smile. "However, I do think that it's pretty fun."
"It'll be fun gutting you, you freak! It'll be just like what I did just recently… I KILLED CHRISTA!"
Donna froze where she was for at least three seconds.
"Nah!" Needles continued. "I'm just messing with you! I honestly don't know where she is. But maybe…when I'm finished with you, I'll pay her a visit!"
"Over my dead body!" Donna replied, throwing a heavy object down the stairs. Needles looked closer to see a paint can hurling right at his face. It hit him right at that spot, causing him to fall back down to the floor.
"You fool!" Needles exclaimed, climbing up the stairs. "I hope your folks got your tombstone for Christmas!"
"I think I said the wrong words there…"
Once the clown freak reached the top of the staircase, he held his machete tightly, eager to make his move and bring poor Donna to her end. "Now…" he hissed, "…when I tell you to come, you better come!"
Donna did not move; she let her emotions get the best of her, holding herself back from action.
"What…" Needles continued. "Are you gonna cry about it? Go ahead, cry!"
"I believe I get to have the last laugh…" Donna replied. And with those words said, she performed the one stunt that the villain was never prepared to see. He watched as Donna leaped into the air and flipped completely over him. And once she landed onto the floor, she struck at Needles from behind, kicking him down onto the floor. Then she snatched the deadly machete from his hand and banged the flat side of it on his head.
Nothing else happened for a few seconds. But then, unexpectedly, Needles heard the sudden sound of laughter. He looked up to see Donna's expression displaying complete joy and happiness. She laughed hard, seeing how easily she earned this victory, thanks to the words of encouragement of Christa. There was no turning back from this joy.
"What are you looking at?" Needles shouted. "Embarrassing, is it not?"
"Oh, Needles…" Donna replied, still chuckling. "Just look at you now! This really proves that you just can't ruin a holiday!"
"I can still try to kill you any OTHER day!"
"Like that will ever happen!"
Back at the church, Ratchet tried very hard to stay awake. But every few seconds, his head would droop downwards, his eyes closing and lulling him to sleep. To keep himself awake, he would occupy his mind with the thought of Donna not sitting at that reserved spot on the pew. "I really wish Donna was here…" he would keep thinking to himself. "I really wish I could go back to the mansion and keep her company…see if she's okay… I've never been so worried about her, just like I was about Pupuru…"
But his thoughts were suddenly cut off by the preacher's final words to wrap up the festivities: "May peace be with you… and let the Lord be in your hearts forever… amen…and God bless you!"
Suddenly, before anyone was able to walk out the doors, Captain Qwark came barging in with his sack of presents. "Ho, ho, ho!" he exclaimed in laughter. "Merry Christmas to all!"
"What is the meaning of this?" Jebidiah demanded.
"My apologies, reverend," Qwark replied. "I just chose to drop by and make some deliveries. I believe I have something for you too!"
Qwark pulled a book out of the bag and handed it to Jebidiah; the preacher's face showed a surprised expression when he saw what it was. "This is just the book I've been asking for!" he exclaimed. "A highly recommended book by Avi, Crispin: The Cross of Lead!"
"So THAT'S what Qwark has been up to lately!" Ratchet thought, watching the head of the Galactic Rangers hand out the gifts. "He was only supposed to dress as Santa Claus for the mall. I guess this will do too!"
Finally, the League of Heroes made it back home safely. They did not expect Needles to be there at all, as they had thought throughout the whole month of December. But they found a nasty surprise when they got to their driveway: they found the villain bound and gagged, and lying on the seat of a sleigh.
"I did NOT see this coming!" Ratchet exclaimed as he laughed. "It looks like Santa made short work of you!"
"It was not the fatso, you idiot!" Needles barked in reply. "Your Lombax friend did this! And then THIS big thing dropped from the sky, summoning Captain Qwark!"
"You mean…" Qwark excitedly exclaimed, "…I get to deliver presents to all the houses? I've got to thank the big man for this opportunity! All the reindeer are ready for takeoff! But first, we'll have to stop at Blackfield Asylum, because I've got to drop a certain gift to a certain prison cell."
"No you don't! I don't want to go back there yet again!"
Ratchet and the others walked inside to see another surprise waiting for them. They saw Donna sitting on the couch, and watching "It's a Wonderful Life" on the television set. Next to her was the Christmas tree, but with more wrapped presents underneath it. Ratchet had noticed this big difference, putting him in a mixed state of confusion and excitement.
"Did she literally just go Christmas shopping?" he thought out loud. "Or am I imagining things?"
"You're not seeing things, Ratchet," Donna replied with a smile. "You're all just lucky to have a friend like me."
"So…you don't hate Christmas anymore?" Sackboy asked her, with a look of hope.
"Not anymore, little guy," Donna replied. "Merry Christmas!" And with that, she gave him a small kiss on the cheek. Sackboy smiled big, his button eyes glowing with joy.
Ratchet was startled from this sight. He did not know what to say at all, but to just stand there motionless.
"What's the matter?" Donna spoke to him. "I don't bite."
"I just need some answers…" Ratchet shyly replied.
The next morning was the big day, December 25, Christmas Day. Everyone was still asleep past 8:00 a.m.; but Sackboy was the first to wake up and walk down to the living room. He saw tons of presents underneath the lit Christmas tree. His smile grew as he found the larger boxes. But the thing that made him satisfied the most was that Donna had put her lollipops and candy canes inside her new stocking.
"She kept my gift to her!" Sackboy thought, his button eyes reflecting the Christmas lights. "I never thought she'd be so happy!"
Pretty soon, everyone else woke up and gathered in the living room, all except one. Donna was still asleep, recovering from the tension from the night before. But she did eventually get out of bed to join the others downstairs, thanks to Sackboy nipping at her nose.
Captain Qwark was the last to appear; he came in through the front door, still in his Santa Claus outfit. "Well, that's the last of them!" he announced, shaking the snow off his black boots. "It was quite a night! But I made it through all the way. The fun part was dropping off my last gift, which was to good ol' Agent Shepherd."
"What did you give him?" Ratchet replied.
"Nothing important, really. Just another clown who never learns…"
That same time, at Blackfield Asylum, Agent Shepherd went to one of the prison cells to see Needles coated in Christmas wrapping paper. "I guess this is a good Christmas gift," Shepherd thought. "I'll have to thank Captain Qwark for this. Poor Needles… Doesn't he know that evil never prevails…?"
Thank all of you for reading this Christmas spectacular of 2016! You guys have been so supportive and friendly, I'll never forget it. And I'll also thank God for this amazing opportunity for me to write once again, and for giving me the strength I need each day. I love you all!
Merry Christmas to all, and to all a good night!