for auden.

Written using prompts from the 12 Days of Christmas challenge at Caesar's Palace.

WC: 1,093

Little known fact: Draco Malfoy was a sap who had enough money to be a sap who also spoiled his girlfriend. Well known fact: Hermione looked like she didn't love it. Lesser known fact: she was just pretending.

Draco had planned this Christmas at least six months in advance, and he was willing to do whatever it took to make his plan go according to his vision. Even if that included punching a florist. Oops.

Ever since Hermione had moved to Australia for a few months to take care of her parents, he'd had a lot of time to plan.

But, she was coming home for Christmas.

On the first day of Christmas, my true love gave to me
a partridge in a pear tree.

Draco almost caught Hermione by surprise when she came home on the fourteenth of December to see her boyfriend running around the apartment trying to catch a partridge gone rogue.

She laughed and plucked a pear from the tree.

two turtle doves

"Another pair of birds?"

Draco pouted. "They're like us. They're in love."

Hermione raised her eyebrows, and her eyes said all that needs to be said.

"What?" Draco muttered. "They're cooing."

"I'll give you that," Hermione said with a smile before giving him a peck on the cheek. "Three birds in the house might get a little stuffy, but we'll make do for now."

Draco chuckled nervously.

three french hens


"I swear to Merlin, if you got three French hens I'm going to report you for running a zoo without a permit."

Draco plopped three rotisserie chickens on the table.

"Oh, thank God."


"I really did not want to turn in my own boyfriend." Hermione sighed. "But what will we do with these three chickens?" She leaned over to kiss Draco, as she usually did when she came home from work. "I guess we can invite over the Weasleys and the Potters."

"You think three chickens will feed all of those people?"

"On second thought, maybe we can invite just the Potters?"

four calling birds

In an effort to avoid any more birds, Draco had to hire a few boys to come to his doorstep, which honestly sounded weird, but was mostly just so he could have choir boys serenade Hermione on her way in the door.

"Now," he said, "put in these sweaters. They each have a bird on it that will open its mouth every time you press this button. Try to time the mouths for when you open and close your own mouths."

The four boys looked at each other with skepticism, but eventually who looked like the leader rolled his eyes and put on the sweater. "Dude, you're so whipped," the boy said.


"Is there anyone else I could be talking to?"

Draco flushed. "Just sing."

five golden rings

Hermione opened the door with a smile big enough to light the room. "Are we continuing the twelve days of Christmas theme?"

"Maybe," Draco said slyly. "Sort of." He pulled a box out behind his back. "I figured you didn't need five rings, so I just got you one."

six geese a-laying

Draco figured Hermione wouldn't want six geese waddling around the house. Sometimes she was confusing, but he knew at least that much.

Instead, he had wrapped a beautiful golden box inside were six little ornaments he hoped Hermione would appreciate. Each was a different color, dusted with gold and silver and painted with swirls and other patterns. They glittered in the lights on the Christmas tree like little stars.

When Hermione opened the box (not without playfully punching Draco for spending so much on her), her pleased gasps were worth it.

seven swans a-swimming

"Where are you taking me, Draco?"

"Quiet, dear. I need to concentrate."

With that, he apparated with a crack, clutching Hermione's hand tightly in his.

When they landed, Hermione lurched forward. "Oh, I didn't know that Apparating while blindfolded would make me feel so sick."

"You doing okay?"

"Yeah, fine," Hermione conceded. "Can I guess where we are?"

Draco smiled at his bright witch, though he knew she couldn't see him. "Only yes or no questions."

"Are we somewhere I've been before?"

"Not that I know of."

"Hm, are we going to be going into a restaurant?"

"Good guess, but no."

"Are we sightseeing?"

"Of sorts."

"Can I take off my blindfold?"

"Okay, fine."

Draco heard a rustle, then a pleased yelp.

He just knew she'd like seeing a lake full of black and white swans.

eight maids a-milking

"I didn't want to get you eight maids a-milking for obvious reasons."

Hermione nodded.

"But here are some...figurines?"

nine ladies dancing

Hermione walked into the room shyly, her mind bringing back memories of the Yule Ball at Hogwarts.

"You look great, Draco!" She grinned.

"Same to you." He stuck out his arm and nodded at her, asking her to take it.

She rolled her eyes a bit at his mannerism before putting her hand on his arm. "Aren't you glad I thought it'd be a good idea to go to this ball?"

"Well," Draco said, "considering it's like pulling teeth trying to get you to take your mind off of work, I consider this a success."

"Draco! I just remembered that I have some paperwork due tomorrow. Think you could wait an hour?"

Draco gave her a pointed look.

"Just kidding."

ten lords a-leaping

"Hermione, watch this!"

Hermione turned from her desk. "This better be good!"

"Okay, the paperwork might be interesting but this might be better."

"Let's see it!"

Draco sniffed haughtily and then turned on the music behind him with a flick of his wand. The prancing he did around the room was a story that Hermione would talk about for years.

eleven pipers a-piping

Draco had searched high and low for this present. It had to be perfect.

He knew that Hermione had always been interested in learning how to play the flute (she'd once drunkenly confessed as much).

"So, what's the best you have?" Draco asked the lady at the desk. He had asked around for the best place to find collector instruments, and he hoped he'd be able to find a gold flute.

"It's perfect."

twelve drummers drumming

"Merry Christmas eve," Draco said with a smile. He looked over at Hermione who was sitting at the concert beside him.

"Merry Christmas eve to you too," she whispered. In her eyes shined something warm.

The bass drum kept time to their hearts as they wrapped their arms around each other.