Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight. This disclaimer applies to each chapter in this story.

Unbeta'd so all mistakes are my own. If you find any typos, feel free to point them out so I can fix them.

Saudade: /saʊˈdɑːdə/


a feeling of longing, melancholy, or nostalgia.


Bella Swan let out a low breath as she stared up at the sky. It was almost midnight and the sounds coming from the party she'd abandoned were barely audible over the sound of the wind through the tall trees. She'd stumbled out of the house with her coat and a picnic blanket she'd taken from the hall closet and now rested on top of it, staring up at the moon.

She didn't know why she'd even bothered to go to the party in the first place, but they'd sent out a department wide invitation and at the time it had sounded better than calling in the new year by herself. Now she wished she'd stayed home. She was only twenty-four, she didn't understand how she could feel so empty, so aimless.

It was then, staring up at the sky with tears in her eyes that they started the countdown.


Please don't be another year like this, she pleaded to the universe.


Don't let me stay in a job that I hate with co-workers who can't even remember my name.


Help me find a home with people who actually care about me.


Give me an opportunity to cook something that isn't ramen for dinner.


Show me where I fit in, where my place in the world is.


Make sure I have enough time to read again. I miss it.


Let me have an adventure.


Help me find him. The one I'm meant for, the one who's meant for me. My soulmate.


Let him be kind and clever and passionate. Let him need me in his life as much as I need him in mine.


And, please, let us be together. Forever.


She closed her eyes then and tears fell from their corners, making their way into her hair.

She didn't see the star shooting across the sky, taking her wishes with it.