Olympic Pen Missed Connections

I have decided to be really stupid (I mean brilliant) and post two- maybe three- stories at the same time. I just posted the first chapter to the other one and now, here is this one. I doubt I will be able to post every update simultaneously as I am flying by the seat of my plus size drawers on this one. But this is the light-hearted alternative to the other fic. And as Sarcastic Bimbo said, "I need this in my life!"

Again, I don't own this. I rarely do in depth research, I am not a descriptive writer and frankly as a reader, I don't like having to think a whole lot. That is why I read. To escape reality. So this is fiction, folks. I don't have a beta or a pre-reader so any grammatical or punctuation errors are all mine and I do own them. I don't have a set schedule but if I had to guess, I would probably say once a week on Sunday so if I happen to update more than that it will be a surprise to us all.

And gasp! No doctors in this one... unless Bella shoots someone.

Very short prologue so I will probably post an extra chapter this week to make up for it.


Jan 6 You pulled a gun on me… (Port Angeles) - m4w

It was NYE at The Dam Bar out on Hwy 101. You were with some friends- two girls. You caught my eye when I walked in and all I wanted to see was yours. But it was dim and I am too vain to wear my glasses out in public. You were gesturing wildly at your friends and then you stalked out. I decided to follow you out into the admittedly dark and empty parking lot where you were parked in the way back, but I'd had a few drinks and wasn't thinking clearly. I saw you tense up the moment you realized I was behind you but you kept walking to your car, more quickly now. You unlocked it and wrenched open your door and just as I was about to greet you, I was instead greeted by your 9mm Ruger. I know now that your eyes are brown, which coincidentally was the same color as the stain in my boxer briefs that night when I took them off.

I can't get you out of my mind. I want to know your name, though I do admit I call you Annie Oakley. I want to know what your life is like. I want to know everything about you- how you take your coffee, what you do for a living, and if you pull your gun on every guy you meet. So, if you see this, please meet me at 8pm on January 13- a week from now- at the place where you tried to kill me and we can maybe see where this goes.


Edward C. Cullen

Thanks for reading and I would love to read your thoughts. Also, I have a FB group called... wait for it... Bitter Harpy Fanfiction so if you want teasers or the what not just ask to join.