"That is a lot of gold," Sarah said, staring at the car sized pile of small gold bars that had appeared in the middle of the atrium.
"Ten Mana," Xander replied with a grin. "This should more than cover paying for whatever you guys need over the next decade."
"When you said you were going to give us a ton of gold I think you were understating it," John said as he picked up one of the small gold bars.
"I wanted to make sure everything was taken care of before I left," Xander replied.
"There is one final threat to John," Uncle Bob spoke up. "Reprogrammed Terminators have been known to turn on the humans they are working with. I require termination."
"Whoa!" John called out. "Hold the fucking phone now! I thought we already figured this out with the whole treating people like shit leads to a shit end?"
"It is a good theory," Uncle Bob agreed, "but without testing that is all it is… and I do not wish to become a threat to you."
"Or I could hit you with mind control so you'd have no choice but to continue following John's orders," Xander pointed out.
"How long does mind control last?" Sarah asked.
"It's permanent," John and Xander chorused.
"Basically it puts him under my command just like my summons," Xander explained.
"That is acceptable," Uncle Bob decided.
"Great," Xander said, calling up two Blue Mana and focusing on everything he'd learned about control seals and using Blue Mana to mentally influence someone before pressing a hand into the center of Uncle Bob's chest and forcing reality to obey his will.
"What are your orders?" the T-800 asked as the spell took effect.
"Keep following John's orders, the one from the future, and let us know if your programming ever reverts or you develop beyond any controls Skynet has built into you," Xander replied.
"Affirmative," Uncle Bob said with a smile… that still made everyone who saw it wince.
"We really have to work on that," John said, shaking his head but unable to stop himself from smiling in relief that he'd be able to keep Uncle Bob.
"If only I'd kept my mouth shut," Buffy muttered as she and Faith passed through the cemetery.
"What?" Faith asked.
"If I had just kept my mouth shut, Xander wouldn't have made that wish," Buffy ranted, "but no, I had to jump in with both feet without even looking!"
It took Faith a couple of seconds to figure out what Buffy meant. "You do know that if he didn't make a wish he'd be dead, right?"
"What?" Buffy asked, confused.
"That Demon Lord guy was planning on killing him," Faith pointed out, "and according to Jeeves, all of us together couldn't have stopped him. You didn't off Xander by being a bitch, you got his turned into some kind of uber god and chucked into eternity."
"Well… we probably could have helped him come up with a better wish if I hadn't jumped in," Buffy said with a sigh.
"The dude was offering a monkey's paw wish and has had thousands of years experience twisting them," Faith said. "No, catching him flat footed like that was a one in several million shot and Xander made it out alive and with powers. Now, I ain't used to doing the Jimmy Cricket shit, but don't you have any confidence in X?"
"Do you know the kind of stuff he's done?" Buffy asked dryly.
"Broke a prophecy to save your ass, saved my ass from some of the blue girls, probably saved everyone else's ass a time or two, and then there's that whole thing with the zombies scattered about and a bomb in the basement," Faith replied, matching the blonde Slayer's tone.
"He's also dated a life sucking mummy, been possessed by a hyena, almost got turned into a fish demon, and then there was the whole love spell incident," Buffy pointed out.
"Have any of you guys had normal lives here?" Faith asked with a frown. "I mean, was that really stranger than anyone else?"
"Willow had one cyber stalking guy turn out to be a demon and her first boyfriend turn out to be a werewolf," Buffy said thoughtfully. "So… yeah, Xander's life is kinda out there even for here. Halloween affected us all, there was the mantis lady… Yeah, Xander attracts the weird even more than a Slayer."
"I'm not saying the odds aren't against him… but sometimes ya gotta have a little faith, ya know?"
Buffy nodded and then groaned. "That was a horrible pun and you should feel bad for saying it… but Xander would probably have laughed and done that eyebrow wiggle of his."
Faith snickered as she realized her unintended pun. "Hey look, its stress relief," she said cheerfully as she spotted a handful of vampires, "and we got em outnumbered two to five."
"Math doesn't work that way," one of the vamps snorted, before taking in the grins on their 'dinner' and the stakes in their hands. "Aw crap!"
"Between all this and having regen you guys should be good," Xander said. "Of course regen would be more useful if there wasn't a chance I'd accidentally used the forest connected to it for Mana that day, so I'll have to spend some time collecting more Green Mana to lower the odds on it."
"I always keep some one use Mana items for things like that, tokens if possible, artifacts if not," John replied.
"That may actually work," Xander said thoughtfully. "I've been working on figuring out Moxs and they are practically tailored for this."
"Give it a shot," John suggested, "what's the worse that can happen?"
Calling up a single Green Mana and compressing it in his hand, Xander focused on the concept of a Mox Emerald. He'd never actually seen a Mox Gem, but if the cards were accurate it should be possible to create one and between Tsunade's necklace and the Kitsune's star ball he should be able to make something at least roughly similar.
The Mana squirmed in his hand like jello, trying to escape his grasp, so he called up a second Green Mana and created a rectangular gem on a gold chain to force it into. Xander winced and held his glowing fist as far away from himself as possible, bracing for an explosion. After a few seconds he relaxed and cautiously opened his eyes. Seeing that his hand was no longer glowing he opened it, revealing an emerald necklace that looked ordinary, if beautiful.
"It worked?" John asked.
"Seems to," Xander agreed as he scanned the necklace and grinned. "Yep, cost me two Mana, which means I'm probably doing something wrong, but it is a functional Mox Emerald."
"For a second I thought it was going to explode," Ellie admitted as she opened a Coke.
"So did I," Xander agreed cheerfully, "but it's stable and stylish and will fuel a regeneration spell so I don't have to worry about keeping track of things." He handed it to Ellie. "Wear this and if you ever take lethal damage it'll automatically kick in or you can set it off yourself to fix a stubbed toe, just remember regen only works once per day."
"So broken," John said with a grin.
"Planeswalker," Xander said with a grin as he called up more Mana to create another Mox Emerald necklace, finding it much easier, now that he knew what the finished product would be.
"I'll take a ring if you don't mind," Joel said.
"Same," John agreed.
"Sure," Xander agreed as he passed a necklace to Sarah.
Ten Minutes Later
"And done," Xander said, passing the last Mox Emerald necklace to Cameron.
"I am so going to miss you when you're gone," John said, "you're like a genie, but not an asshole one. Think Barbara Eden, but with less fuck ups."
"And not nearly as hot," Xander agreed. "So, any other wishes?"
"Finish giving us a copy of all the movies you scanned and give us some more tricksters and female Terminators before you go," John listed off.
"I get the movies, but why the additional women?" Xander asked.
"Still need more female Terminators to cover for places where a male one would stick out," John explained, "and since this is going to be our last chance to stock up in case of emergencies I thought I'd ask. Also can you make them look like Mom and Eliie so they can cover for them? Having ones that could stand in for me and Joel also is a good idea now that I think about it."
"That's a good point," Xander admitted. "Okay, so another half a dozen Terminators and two tricksters."
"Why tricksters?" Sarah asked. "I'm pretty sure the ninja can accomplish just about anything they could."
"We also need another half a dozen nin," John said, "and the tricksters use a different form of magic than the ninja and are the best ones to send out to relay reports from their sisters, since they'll know all their tricks and can locate them easier."
"Planning for the worse?" Bill asked.
"Just covering all the bases," John said. "This may delay Xander for a day at most to cover everything and it makes damn sure everything is covered before he leaves and can't help anyone."
"I do believe he plans on visiting," Ryu pointed out.
"Yeah, but he's a noob Planeswalker jumping into the Blind Eternities without a map, his next visit could be anywhere from a decade to a millennium," John explained.
"A very good point," Xander said with a grin, "but then you didn't get tagged as the next savior of humanity by being an idiot."
"And while an awesome title I'd prefer not to earn it by going through all the crap Commander Me had to go through," John said. "Ain't no kill like overkill, let's cover the bases and nail the fuckers to the ground!"
Xander grinned. "That's exactly what I'd do if I were you. I think I can spare another day just to be sure."
"It's going to be years before I can really believe its over," Sarah said with a sigh. "Too much has happened."
"You'll be training as if it was still going to occur for the next five, so there's no rush," Xander told her. "A little paranoia is healthy in this case."
"How about a lot?" she asked dryly.
"It's time traveling cyborgs from a post apocalyptic future," Xander said bluntly, "I don't think there is such a thing as too paranoid or prepared in this situation."
Sarah considered that. "That makes me feel a little better."
"Okay, let's create some female Terminators," Xander said. He hadn't tried to create a Terminator with a particular look before, but looks were much less integral to a summons than sex and he'd been flipping those at will, so he figured it should be easy enough to do and if it wasn't he'd soon find out.
Xander called up the appropriate Mana while focusing on Sarah's looks and created a female Terminator.
"Ahh!" John yelped and covered his eyes. "Clothes!"
"Oops," Xander muttered, quickly creating a black trench coat and passing it to the naked Terminator. "Your name is Linda," he told her.
"Did she have to be naked?!" John demanded, cautiously uncovering his eyes.
"No, I was just focusing too much on appearance and forgot clothes," Xander admitted.
"You know what I look like naked?" Sarah asked, before immediately following up with, "Or is it just a function of the spell?"
"You look like a double of Linda Hamilton," Xander replied with a shrug, not wanting to get into the whole world as myth and I might have seen you topless in a couple of movies as has a couple of billion other people. "Turns out appearance is easy to manipulate when creating summons. Who knew?"
"Cool," John said, "except for the whole naked Mom bit."
"Except for that," Xander agreed with a snicker.
"Can you do it with clothes?" John begged. "Cause we need a body double for Ellie too and while I wouldn't mind-"
He was quickly shut up by Ellie's elbow.
"Yeah, I think I can handle that," Xander said, trying not to laugh.
Two Days Later…
Xander awoke with a grin as Mana flooded his system. "God, I love that!"
Cameron tilted her head as she observed him.
"None of my medical files have any physiological reactions similar to that, that do not involve methamphetamines," the T-800 replied.
Xander shrugged. "I'm no longer human, so…"
Cameron blinked but said nothing.
"Well, I'm going to shower and make one last breakfast for everyone before we go," Xander said as he got up.
"Most will not be eating breakfast for several hours," Cameron reported.
"Yeah, we are going to leave a note and slip out," Xander said, "I hate goodbyes."
"Acknowledged," Cameron replied and waited for his return.
"This is crazy even for you," the red haired woman told her partner as she looked over the files he'd passed her.
"I'm not saying I believe it," he told her, "I'm just saying that something strange is going on and there's been several more files to add to the case in the last couple of days."
"A body builder high on PCP wiped out a police station, chasing a waitress and a homeless man with schizophrenia," she said bluntly, "I'm not seeing it as all that complicated."
"After murdering his way through all the women with similar names in the phonebook," he reminded her. "I have a copy of the footage from inside the station."
"I thought it was lost," she said, not sounding at all surprised that her partner had somehow acquired missing evidence.
"I had some friends search for it," he replied with a smirk before hitting play on the VCR.
She watched the screen, her shock at the amount of violence quickly turning to disbelief. "That's impossible."
"It's the actual footage, everything matches up," he assured her.
"No, I mean that… man isn't on PCP," she said firmly, "and even if he was it wouldn't explain how the kinetic force of the bullets didn't knock him down!"
"Have I drawn your interest, Scully?" he asked.
"You have my attention, Mulder," she admitted with a sigh. "What else do you have?"
Typing By: Abyssal Angel
TN: Not gonna lie, I thought it was crossing over with Bones at first. I can only imagine Xander's reaction to Booth would be hilarious. I really need to watch X-Files at some point…