Disclaimer: I only own my OC and crazy magic. Despite my teasing, I have a massive amount of respect for Mashima, who created this lovely universe in the first place. Spoilers for EVERYTHING (and I mean fucking EVERYTHING).

Lots of changes. Diverges from canon a lot, with only some things coinciding and only a few arcs happening in the right order.

Warnings for swearing and violence. Will be both angsty and fluffy (and more than a little crazy). You may end up laughing or crying. Or staring at the screen in shock. Much squealing may be caused. No smut, but references to sex, rape, or bodily functions. Mental disorders including but not limited to: PTSD, depression, kleptomania, etc. Many possible triggers. More singing than I planned for. Breaking the fourth wall (a little). FULL ON CALAMITY. Beta'd by myself.

Also on AO3, Quotev, and Wattpad, if one of those sites are preferred.

Enjoy, and welcome to the bandwagon!

Chapter One - Elle, Part One

I awoke to my new life in a bed, surprisingly enough.

I got out of bed, and started exploring my new house (which, upon looking out the window, was a decidedly small cottage in the middle of the woods). Upon reaching a kitchen table, I came upon a pile of books, and a magazine with today's date. On it was a sticky note that said – Today is your 9th birthday. Good luck on your adventure! These books should help you with what you need. I'll be excited to see how it turns out.

I peeled off the sticky note and looked at the magazine. Sorcerer Weekly

In the top right corner was the date; May 1st, X772.

It was real.

I had never been in a car accident in my life.

I guess, even now, I still haven't really been in a car accident. I wasn't anywhere near the two cars when they crashed, I just got hit by a flying vehicle half way down the road.

I did not see my life flash before my eyes; hell, I didn't even know there was a car coming my way until someone started screaming. So I turn and-

SPLAT.

Then I was a pancake. Flat, and well, not really a pancake because I was covered in blood and I'm not really food (I mean unless you're a cannibal) and I'm gonna stop now cause it's getting morbid.

The point is, I got hit by a flying car, and died.

Not one of the best ways to start the day, I'll admit.

And now I'm here. In a library. Which I'm pretty sure is the afterlife, seeing as how my body doesn't hurt and I feel perfectly fine, and I'm fairly sure that I've never been cleaner or looked prettier in my life.

I peeked my head out into the hall, so I could see the rest of the bookcases.

My eyes widened as I comprehended how big this jungle was.

It didn't end! The rows of books just went on and on and on until it got so far away I couldn't even see what I was looking at.

Maybe it's just the angle? I wondered. I moved over to the table in the middle of the row, and climbed on top of it. Carefully shuffling my way over to the bookcase, I placed my foot on a lower rung, and slowly reached my hand up to the top shelf.

"What are you doing?" a voice came from behind me.

I jumped in fright and let go of the bookcase.

"Fuck!"

Landing on the ground, I realized that it didn't hurt, and getting back up, it seemed like the fall had not affected or hurt my body in any way. The curse had been instinctual – there was no actual pain.

Oh, right. I was dead.

Someone giggled behind me, and I turned to see a small girl, of about seven or eight years old at the most.

I blinked at her. "How the hell are you dead? You look what, eight?"

She giggled again (which is good, considering that what I had just said was really rude and untactful, and hey I died earlier today, alright?). "No, silly, I'm not dead! This is my library!"

I really hope she doesn't mean what I think she means.

Because if she did, then I just cursed in front of God.

Shit.

I mean…oh just fuck it.

"Sorry for cursing," I said sheepishly, rubbing my hand behind the back of my neck. "It's kinda gotten instinctual at this point. But, if you don't mind me asking, what exactly happens now…my...lord?"

She full out started laughing. "I spend most of the time in this form for a reason! You don't have to treat me like that silly! I'm trying to make you more comfortable."

"Uh, having an all-powerful being looking younger than me isn't that reassuring."

"Hmm, how about this:" And then she turned into Zeus.

Not actually Zeus, but like…twelve feet tall with a big beard and super intimidating presence and I squeaked, "While I didn't like the kid form it was better than this one!"

He laughed again, and turned back into a woman, slightly taller than me. She had a motherly air, and for the first time, I fully relaxed in her presence.

"Now," she said, clasping my hands down and pulling me to the table. "Let's take a look at your book!"

"My book?" I asked.

"Yes, this library contains the records of every soul that has passed through. And yours is right…here!" she pulled a book of the shelf. It was surprisingly large (probably over two thousand pages), considering I had died at…fuck, was today my birthday? Dammit, I died on my nineteenth birthday?

"Isn't that a bit large?" I asked.

"Yes, it is, but you are very smart and creative, so it has a large concentration of your thoughts and ideas."

All my thoughts and ideas. "Could I possibly get a copy of that later?"

She laughed, "We'll see. Now…Eleanor Rigby."

Oh yes, laugh at my name hardy har har. I get it. I've heard all of the jokes, trust me. That's why I go by Elle. Or sometimes Ellie or Ella or literally anything else because I hate Eleanor. My name is Elle.

She continued. "Born May 1st, 1998, in Boston, where you were put up for adoption. However, you were never adopted and decided to run away instead at the age of twelve. Upon finding an occupant-less apartment, you moved in and decided to start working at the age of thirteen, passing for a sixteen year old. Continued until the day of your death, when you got hit by a car."

A flying car.

She closed the book. That was fast. "Any questions?"

"Yeah, I've got a few." I admitted. Okay…first I guess I should start with my previous life. "What happened to everyone else in the accident? Did anyone else die? Or get hurt?"

She opened the book again, flipping to the end. "You were the only fatality, however the others have broken several important bones."

Was it bad that I was a bit upset they weren't hurt more?

Oh well, since I'm dead they'll still go to jail for manslaughter. I think.

"Alright, what else?"

"Um…what do I do next? While this library is very big, I highly doubt that all of us just move in here or something, that would be suffocating."

She laughed. "That's up to you. Your limit is your imagination."

I paused, thinking. It is, huh…

I started speaking slowly… "Is the multiverse string theory true?"

She looked surprised, but nodded. "If you're speaking of the one were anything imagined is created in another universe and becomes reality there, then yes."

"Would it be possible for me to be born into a fictional universe with my memories from this one? Actually, scratch that, would it be possible for me to regress to a younger age and go there at a certain point in time?"

She was outwardly smiling now. "Well, I don't get requests like that often. But yes, it is possible."

It's possible. "Would you be willing to do it?"

She was beaming now. "Yes, yes I would this is the most exciting thing that has happened in years! You think with all of the creative output into the world that more people would request things like that, but noooooooo, it's always a series of ridiculous or boring things!" She calmed down now.

"Why are you so upset about it?" I asked.

She shrugged. "I tend to watch your stories," she said. "I'm an immortal being with nothing but time on my hands. The only thing I can do is get some variety by exploring people's lives."

"Alright, well, if that's the case, then let's set this up. Will you be able to give me things if I give you a list of requested objects/items?"

"Yes," she said, pulling out, surprisingly enough, some paper. She smiled at my look. "This will probably take longer than you think; as you suggest things, more ideas will come. Nothing too outlandish, though."

"Just tell me if I go to a point considered too far." I told her.

She smiled at me. "I'm ready."

"Alright, I would like appear into the Fairy Tail universe," I told her. With what little time I had, I would find myself immersed in the anime and manga. The way that I connected to the characters gave me hope despite my less-than-stellar life.

"Alright," she said. "Mage or non-mage?"

"Mage."

"Type?"

"Ahhhh….." I paused, thinking. "Can I get back to you on that, please."

She nodded. "Mmmmmhmmm. What else?"

I paused, thinking. Did I need anything else?

I nearly slapped myself. Of course I did!

"Would it be possible for me to have a small cottage in the woods near Magnolia, close enough for me to walk to the Fairy Tail guild hall easily, and big enough for me to live comfortably, plus a guestroom."

I hoped that wouldn't be too outlandish.

"Continue," she said, neither approving or disapproving.

"I don't want something too big!" I said quickly, hoping to convince her. "I just want a bedroom, and a kitchen/living area. Then, if possible, an extra room as a library/office, where I can plan out what I'm going to do, and then a guest bedroom. A bathroom with a shower and a tub big enough for two people to lay down in if needed. And then running water and electricity."

She nodded. "Doable."

Yes!

"Would it also be possible to get enough money to eat and clothe myself properly until I can start a job as a mage?"

She gave me a look. "I suppose. However, you must start taking missions as a mage by the age of fourteen at the latest."

Longer than I was hoping for. "You've got it!"

"Are you finished?" she asked.

"Yes," I nodded.

"Alright, then let's get to some magic."

I paused, thinking. "Is there any way for me to get a list of the magics possible and any Lost Magics that I could learn."

She smirked. "If you make up a magic instead, I'll give you extra."

"Okay, then scrap that idea," I said, thinking. I wanted a type of Stellar Magic – both Lucy's Celestial Magic and Jellal's Heavenly Body Magic count as Stellar Magic. To be honest, those were some of the most impressive magics shown in the series, in my opinion.

Think, Elle. We're talking Stellar! What else has to do with outer space? Lucy's magic directly affects the spirits of the stars, and Jellal's magic uses 'heavenly bodies' which is just another name for meteors and asteroids and the like.

Let's see…that leaves mostly the moon and the sun – we've seen Moon Drip, which is a type of dispelling magic, but not much to do with the power of the sun…

But I also wanted something to…do…with the elements…

"Can I describe what I would want?" I asked.

"Possibly," she said.

"I would like something that I would call Planetary Magic. Where the power of each type of planet represents a type of element."

"What would you suggest?" she said, smiling. Her hands passed a paper and pen over to me.

"Let's see…" I said, thinking. "Earth, would definitely be Earth Magic. Mercury is associated with metals, so…" I thought of Gajeel "Iron Magic." "Venus could be Light Magic," I said, starting to get pumped. "Mars could be Fire. Jupiter can be Lightning. Saturn can be Sky Magic. Uranus could be…I'll get back to that. Neptune can be Water. And Pluto can be Shadow Magic."

"Pluto isn't a planet."

"Yeah, I know that, but I grew up thinking it was, and I also need some sort of dark magic to contrast with Venus. I was thinking maybe Uranus could be Ice?"

She looked at me, and then, slowly, she started to clap.

"Anything else?" she said.

"If possible, I would like Requip magic."

"For weapons?" she asked.

"Some, yes, but I was also hoping to keep a first aid kit and food and changes of clothes and other things that might be needed."

"Anything else?"

Well, if she's going to keep offering... "Transportation/teleportation magic, and a type of locating magic for finding people and specific magical items."

She smiled. "Are you sure? You won't get any others, any other magic you try will be difficult for you. And even with these, I'm not really giving you these powers. I'm giving you the tools you need to learn them, such as an affinity for them, a large magical core, and a library that will help you research this and other types of magic."

I frowned. "How can you have books on Planetary Magic? I just made it up."

She chuckled. "Now that it exists, it will be known as a type of Lost Magic – one you in particular have, along with any sort of tools you'll need to perfect it. How powerful do you want to be?"

"As powerful as you can possibly make me," I said. "I'll take care of the rest through training and practice, and I totally understand that I'll probably barely be able to do magic in the beginning and have to work extremely hard. But with all of the things that everyone goes through in the series, plus whatever changes happen because of me, I'm going to need as much help as I can get for everyone."

She nodded. "And what year do you want to be born?"

I stopped to think. Lucy was supposed to be…what, seventeen when the story starts? And Laxus, the oldest generation is supposed to be around twenty three… So maybe I'll be around twenty one going on twenty two? If Lucy was born in X767, then I would be born in…

"Year X763," I said aloud. "Is that it then?"

"Yes, if you're sure about this. You will be reverted to a childlike form, to an age younger than ten, so you can better adapt your magic."

"Yes." I nodded. I have never been surer of anything in my life.

"Then," she said, smiling. "It's time to start your new journey. Don't forget to have fun. Good luck, Elle."

I smiled as I realized that she had said my preferred name. "Thank you."

And then everything disappeared.

Ships will be: Laxus x Elle, Natsu x Lucy, Gajeel x Levy, Gray x Juvia, Jellal x Erza, Elfman x Evergreen, Freed x Mira, Bickslow x Lisanna, Erik x Kinana, and Sting x Yukino. Partners for everyone else (particularly Wendy (Chelia vs Romeo vs Mest (if I change the time skip)), Ultear and Cana) are up for grabs and open to suggestions.

This will only be 1st POV from the OC – everything else will be 3rd, unless it's a letter/diary/journal type document.

Also, I put a lot of work into this. If things seem odd, it's probably meant to be that way. It will be explained in time.

Please review – they get me thinking and writing faster.