Somewhere, floating in the depths of space, there is a table. Yes, a table. It is a stately, mahogany
table, polished so that it shines with a glow that before was only seen on pearls. There it floats,
drifting amongst the stars. And next to it, there resides an ottoman. And besides the ottoman, a tea

These phenomena, however, having absolutely nothing to do with the story, shall not be
discussed further.

Now, interestingly enough, inside of the house of one Yugi Motou, there is a table that is an
exact twin of the aforementioned space table. This does have to do with the story, because it was
at this table that all the trouble began.

It started as a perfectly normal day. Yami, the ancient spirit residing in Yugi's millennium
pendant, which, by the way, has special powers and also doubles as a puzzle if you get bored, got
up and looked out the window.

"This," he stated, "Begins a new day. For I shall expand my empire beyond the limits of man.
Yes, I shall…"

However, he was not able to finish his wordy and grandiose speech, for Yugi woke up
immediately afterwards and kicked Yami into the soul room, where he proceeded to pout and do
unnatural things to embalming jars.

Yugi kicked the blankets off of his legs, stood up, and narrowly missed being hit by a ninja star
aimed for his head. It shot through the window, scattering glass all over the floor, and then
thudded into the closet wall, pinning a pink, scented piece of paper neatly to the football-
patterned wallpaper.

"Darn it," muttered Yugi, "I just redid my closet after that cherry bomb incident." He made his
way across his room, carefully sidestepping the broken glass, and pulled the ninja star and the
note out of the wall.

"Dear Yugi," he read, laying the star down next to the arrow, the dagger, the mace, and oddly
enough, the rubber ducky that had been used as projectiles of death, "I will soon take possession
of you Millennium Puzzle, and then will take over the world. Ha. Mwahahaha. Ha. Love, Yami

There passed a silence, in which Yugi thought about whether it would be easier to just let Yami
Bakura have the bloody puzzle, or if his hairstyle really was weird, and also if he should have
toast or pancakes for breakfast. For Yugi, as you know, was a very deep kid.

Finally, he crumpled the paper in one hand, and attached it to a random piece of furniture. "Yami
Bakura is *so* paying for my new wallpaper," he growled, then headed down the stairs to get
something to eat.

Ah, yes. A perfectly normal morning.

But elsewhere, even as Yugi trudged down the stairs to his paradoxical table, the forces of
Darkness, Chaos, and Evil gathered. Their ultimate goal had been envisioned. They had all the
resources necessary to implement it. The world, as everyone knew it, was about to come to an
abrupt and violent end. Yes, they were planning…

A school dance.

In the school auditorium, there gathered the hooded figures of the student council. There, they
began to hatch their sinister plot.

"I say we make it have a 60's theme."

"No, how about Under The Sea?"

"Everyone does Under The Sea!"

"You're just upset because we wouldn't let you do the Torture Chamber theme!"

"But I could come up with plenty of fake blood! And those instruments of torture and pain in my
mom's cellar are going to waste!"

"I don't care! That's just plain disgusting."

The members of the student council began to argue about whether or not pink was a suitable color
for men's shirts, and if the dance was to contain those little fondue things everyone liked, and
about shoes and ships and sealing wax, and cabbages and kings…

Well, their conversations branched out into many different tangents, as conversations are liable to
do, if you continue them for some time.

They were just discussing the best way to eat a Reese's, (Incidentally, the best way to eat a
Reese's is to smash it into little pieces, then pour it into strawberry milk.), when the leader of the
sordid little group finally realized , 'Oh bloody hell, it's past noon and we haven't decided on

Which, of course, was unfair and untrue, as they had decided, in just the past five minutes, that
blue was a suitable color for men's underwear to be.

He stood up on his seat, waved his hands in the air, and signaled for quiet. This doesn't work, by
the way, unless if you're in a mime convention. Anywhere else, you have to yell 'QUIET!' at the
top of your lungs and send a chair crashing to the floor.

The gym was plunged into silence.

"We will have…a costume party!" announced the student council president, in the same tone one
would say 'a tournament.'

The rest of the student council gasped simultaneously.

"With prizes!" declared the president, blatantly proud of his new idea. He was a man of little
imagination, and for him, this was genius-level thinking.

"And dancing?" asked one of the members. She was stupid.

"Yes!" roared the president. "And it will be the best school dance…in all the land!"

Everyone cheered so loud that the janitor felt forced to put the sprinkler system on to shut them

And so it came to pass that the school dance was to be scheduled on that Friday. Flyers were sent
out to everyone who went to that school, and some people who didn't go to that school, and even
some people who weren't even from the same country. And one of these flyers ended up on the
table in Yugi's kitchen.

May the good times roll.

Not that Yugi was in a state of consciousness that early in the morning, anyway. Having brushed
his teeth with a hair brush, put together an interesting outfit that consisted of a pair of baggy
flannel pants with ducks on them, a tight black leather vest, and a choker with a shamrock on it
that said 'Kiss Me, I'm Irish!', fell down the short flight of stairs to the kitchen, and tried to eat a
washcloth, he had finally pieced together enough of his mind to be able to make some toast.

And then, right on cue, Joey Wheeler opened the door and stepped through the threshold of the
house without knocking. Of *course*, he doesn't need to knock. Like those kids on Leave It To
Beaver don't need to knock, they just pop up randomly in the house, like roaches.

So, Joey, being the special person that he is, had been fully conscious in the morning, and was
perfectly able to string sentences together without the need of caffeine.

Don't you just hate people like that?

Anyway, being perfectly conscious, he was also capable of finding the flyer broadcasting the
news of the school dance, and formulate…a Plan.

And plan in mind, flyer firmly grasped in one hand, he made his way across the kitchen, to where
Yugi was seated at the table, gnawing on a piece of burnt toast.

"Hey, Yugi", he said, holding up the flyer, "I found this on my table this morning."

"YOUR TABLE?" roared Yugi, spitting out the toast, " I suppose just because it was on *your*
table you think you're special, don't you? DON'T YOU? Well, I have a table and a flyer too,
Joey! I don't have to take this!" He glared furiously at Joey.

"Well, I didn't mean…" started Joey, a bit confused.

"Of course you didn't mean it. No one ever means anything! Well, I'm sick and tired of being
treated like a doormat! What about ME, Joey? ME!"

Yugi's grandfather came into the kitchen just then, holding a mug. "Here, Yugi, I made you your

Yugi grabbed the coffee cup and guzzled it down, then slammed the mug on the table, where it
left an unsightly ring on the wood. He blinked disorientedly, looking around the kitchen. Finally
his eyes settled on Joey.

"Oh, hello Joey," he said calmly. "When did you come in?"

"Um…" Joey blinked, then decided to erase the past few minutes from his mind. "I found this on
my table," he started again, gesturing to the flyer. When Yugi showed no signs of boiling over in
a fit of unsurpassable rage, he continued. "It's…um…it says that a school dance is scheduled

Yugi nodded and took a bite out of his blackened toast.

"The dance is going to be a costume party, and there are prizes for the most original costume, the
best made costume, etc."


"I said there are prizes for-"

"I mean the 'etcetera' part. What's that mean?"

"Um…it's like…it means…" he scratched his head. "It's like, when you have a list of words, you
see? And then there's this other word, and it goes with the other words, and you're too lazy to
finish the list of words, so you nail this 'etc.' word in there." He nodded.

"Mmhm." Said Yugi skeptically.

"Yeah." Finished Joey.

The two looked at each other as the eggs that had since lain forgotten, unannounced, and un-
written-about sizzled and burned in their skillet.

Elsewhere, in Ryou's house, similar goings-on were occurring.



"You stole my body again this morning, didn't you?"


"You took my body and used it for evil means, didn't you?"


"You used it when I was sleeping and threatened Yugi with a note."


"I have grass stains on my pajama bottoms."

"Maybe you sleepwalk."

"You stole it."


"You took my body."

"I didn't."

"You did."


"I have evidence in the hidden cameras."

"Flaws in the tape."

"I know you took my body this morning."


"You took it."


"Ha! I *knew* you did!" Ryou stood on his chair, dramatically lifting his arms in the air, "WHY
do you have to go and threaten Yugi with some sort of pointy object or evil scheme every single
day? Can't you act like a normal person for once? Why can't you…"

And so he went on, for at least half an hour, until the piece of paper caught his eye. He blinked.
Then he fell off his chair. For the evil powers of the paper were so strong, that even from that
distance, the curse of it could affect you.

Either that, or he was just clumsy.

Pulling himself upright, he stared at the piece of paper that had caught his eye.

"School…dance? Costume party?" He read inquisitively.

"Who'd come up with such an idiotic idea?" muttered Yami Bakura.

In the depths of the school cafeteria, the president of the student council sneezed.

Meanwhile, in Yugi's kitchen, the Plan was being unfolded.

"So," said Joey, "The prize for the best costume is a complete set of exodia cards."

Yugi snored, his head hitting the table with a loud 'thump', landing in his plate.

"YUGI!" roared Joey.

Yugi shot straight upward. "Ride horsey! The Scarlet Avenger never fails!" He snorted and
picked some pieces of toast from his hair, then blinked and looked at Joey. "Oh, hello Joey. Have
you been here long?"

Joey shoved the flyer in Yugi's face. "OUR SCHOOL IS HAVING A COSTUME PARTY! THE

"Oh!" exclaimed Yugi. "Why didn't you say so to begin with?"

Joey fell off the chair, which was lucky, because at that moment yet another ninja star shot
through the kitchen window and embedded itself in the kitchen calendar, attaching yet another
piece of scented stationary to the wall.

Yugi leaned out of the now-empty window frame to see Yami Bakura biking away, laughing
maniacally. He shook his fist in the air. "Darn you and your property-damaging tendencies!

Joey plucked the ninja star and the note from the wall and proceeded to read. "Dear Yugi," he
read aloud, "I will enter this 'costume party', and I will win the exodia cards, and then I shall win
the next duel we have, and steal your millennium item! Mwah! Mwahahaha! Ha! Love, Yami

He turned to Yugi, who was still leaning out of the window. "What *is* wrong with that guy?
Um…Yugi? Yugi?"

Yugi was suddenly surrounded by a brilliant light, and grew about two feet taller while a bunch of
disembodied voices chanted in the background.

"Ham." Muttered Joey.

"Shut up." Growled Yami. "Now where was I? Ah yes. I will not let him get away with this…"
With that, he looked dramatically off in the background.

Joey sighed and sat down at the table. This was going to be a long day.