Title: Rule #1
Author: Kristen Sharpe
Date: November 13, 2015
Rating: K
Warnings: None.
Disclaimer: "Fullmetal Alchemist" belongs to Hiromu Arakawa, Square ENIX, Studio BONES and various other parties.

Everything that goes wrong is the Colonel's fault.

Simple logic. He gives the orders, after all. The buck stops with him.

"So, Winry, all that busted automail is his fault."

"I suppose he ordered you to use your arm in place of a hammer?"

"The bullet holes in my favorite coat are his fault too."

"You can fix your own coat, Fullmetal!"

"Oh, and so is that time I was nearly burned at the stake by superstitious townspeople."

"That's because you told them that, yes, you were summoning devils, Brother."

"Ask a stupid question... Anyway, it's all the Colonel's fault."