Disclaimer: It's three in the morning and you expect me to write a proper disclaimer! You're nuts! Zzzz… I'll feed you in the morning, Suu… Zzz… mumble grumble Zzz

Intro:

Reiko: whacks Haitani with a pillow Wake up! Your guest is here. goes back to bed

Haitani: in a strange accent I cannae make it captain! We've taken another blow to the mast! Huh, where am I? Dammit you're early!

Keitaro: You told me to come here early, remember?

Haitani: Oh yeah, so what do you want to know?

Keitaro: What's going to happen in this chapter?

Haitani: Nothing much, you're probably going back to Hinata-sou in this chapter. I have the chapter limit planned already so I don't have the time to add any other incidents at the Otohime place. This will probably go for another three or four chapters before I start on the two or three planned endings.

Keitaro: Why three endings? And what are they?

Haitani: I planned three endings so I could appease more people than just giving one ending. I was actually planning on NOT giving an ending and letting the readers make their own, but the people I told that to didn't agree with me so I went with the three ending scheme. The first and second is Naru or Yumiko but the third is a secret (even though I might not actually make it). And to help me with this, I removed the chapter limit on the endings so they could go on for more than ten pages for all I care, just as long as I can wrap it all up.

Keitaro: sleeping Mmmm… Naru…

Haitani: anger mark pops up Dammit listen to me!!! sends Keitaro flying

Keitaro: Oh, right… aren't you going to start soon?

Haitani: No, we start in the morning now get out of here! I need my sleep, or else I'll never get to my capoera lesson in time.

Keitaro: shrugs Alright…

Reiko: Get out now!!! kicks Keitaro out the door and turns off the light

Haitani: I'll get on with the fic later… G'night!

Chapter 5: The return of the manager

Pochi maneuvered his boat alongside the dock and watched Keitaro, Yumiko and Seta say their goodbyes to the Otohimes. "We'll visit you again when we have the chance" Seta told Natsumi as he stepped on board. "Oh, Pochi! It's been a while, how have you been?"

Pochi smiled and replied, "I've been doing pretty well, but I really wish I could get married or get a girlfriend at the very least, I'm too old to be a bachelor." His eyes disappeared behind a shadow for a moment, then he caught Seta in a headlock screaming maniacally, "You got all the girls you damn bastard!!! Natsumi! Haruka! Keiko!!! Come baaaaack!!!"

Yumiko petted the little wolf pup the Otohimes had given her as a present and it nuzzled against her 'chest' contentedly. Keitaro jealously watched from the seat opposite her's. "You want to be in his shoes… paws, don't you?" Devil-Keitaro whispered in Keitaro's ear

Keitaro's little soldier began to salute him at those words and Keitaro looked at Angel-Keitaro, half-begging for help. Angel-Keitaro looked down on him, lit a cigarette and lay back down on his comfortable cloud bed. "Oi! What kind of angel are you? Aren't you supposed to be a guardian of morality?" Keitaro yelled at him

Angel-Keitaro turned a lazy eye towards him and replied, "I'm on vacation, God gets his day off every Sunday, I don't! Why did I have to get assigned to the most perverted man in all of Japan? Other consciences haveit so easy. Yer on yer own kid."

Angel-Kei blew a puff of smoke in his face and reclined back on his cloud. "Hey! Quit it!" Keitaro yelled

"Quit what?" Yumiko asked innocently

Keitaro snapped back to reality and replied while shaking his head vigorously, "No, nothing. I was just daydreaming... Daydreaming, yeah, that's it, daydreaming… Heheheh…"

She shrugged and resumed stroking the wolf's smooth fur, "I swear Kei, it's like you have a world of your own or something, where an angel and a devil version of you fly around your head. You keep spacing out on me. Just like the protagonists in manga"

Keitaro sweatdropped and asked, "Do I really do it that often?"

"Hmm… do you really want some of this that badly, Kei?" she asked him seductively, pointing at her 'chest'

Nooooo!!! Not while my conscience is weakened!!! "Urm… well… you see…" he tried to say

Yumiko shrugged and told him in a disappointed sort of voice, "Well, if you don't want it…" The devil slowly gained control of Keitaro once again

Suddenly the heavy metal door swung open and smacked the back of Keitaro's head before he could lunge at Yumiko's 'things'. Seta stepped inside the cabin and announced to the unconscious Keitaro and the sweatdropping Yumiko happily. "The expedition ended while we were at the Otohimes and we're going back to Hinata today. They already delivered our luggage there and we're going to arrive at the airport in a few minutes, Pochi's going to land the boat at the airstrip, so if you two want to do some hanky-panky you better do it now."

"Umm… Seta-san… Isn't that illegal? Landing the boat at the airstrip. Not to mention dangerous." Yumiko asked him unsurely

"We've been in more dangerous situations, right?" Seta replied after a few moments of thought

"Now that you mention it…" Yumiko trailed off, "Well I'll go with you on deck, Keitaro doesn't seem to want to play."

"Suit yourself Yumi-chan." Seta replied

Seta-san, you have saved me from myself many times, I thank you. "Yu… Yumi-chan…" Keitaro stuttered as he reached out to grab Yumiko's skirt, to get her attention. But before he could reach it the door slammed shut on his hand and the piercing cry of a ronin escaped his lips once more.

A few hours later

Keitaro waved goodbye to Seta and Yumiko as he walked towards the train station. It would probably be weeks maybe months until they would see each other again. "Yumi… It would have been nice to spend some more time with her, she was a bit perverted though…" Keitaro told himself aloud as he stepped on the train.

He sat down and placed his backpack on the seat next to him. After a few minutes of silence he looked around and saw that he wasn't the only one in his car. A group of young schoolgirls giggled as they whispered excitedly amongst themselves, an old man was asleep at the far end of the car, a businessman that kept checking his watch every so often was opposite the giggling girls and he thought he saw a yellow haired woman that reminded him of Yumiko, but he shook the feeling off and pulled out the CD player Seta had given him as a present for his birthday in advance. This one looks nice he told himself as he shuffled through a box of CDs and pulled out one.

Almost everything else was drowned out by the CD player and his thoughts began to wander back to Hinata-sou. I sure miss them… he thought as the slow angsty track ended and a lively one played in its place. Eventually he got off at his station and walked to Haitani and Shirai's apartment. Upon arriving there he opened the rusty Iron Gate and climbed the stairs, closing the gate behind him. He paused for a moment before he opened the door and told himself, "It's late, both of them must be asleep already, I better be quiet. They hardly ever lock the doors anyway." He pushed it open and was knocked off his feet by loud earsplitting rock music.

Keitaro got on his feet, covered his ears and yelled, "Oi, turn that down dammit!!!"

"Finally, you're here! The three of us have been waiting forever!" Haitani replied, turning the volume down a notch.

"The three of you? Is Kentaro in there?" Keitaro replied with a question.

Shirai popped up beside Haitani and replied grinning, "Even better!" he took a few steps to the right and revealed Yumiko drinking a bottle of sake happily, a few empty boxes of Okinomiyaki with the label Ukyo's Okinomiyaki™ stamped on them were scattered behind her.

Keitaro's jaw dropped and he pointed a shaking finger at Yumiko, "What are you doing here? Did these guys pick you up or something while you were looking for an apartment?" he asked her

Yumiko placed the sake bottle on the floor and replied, "Pick me up? Like hell! These two idiots couldn't pick up a dog. Haitani's a childhood friend of mine, I came here to ask them where I could find a good place to stay. But I decided this place looked nice and I decided that I'll be staying here."

"Can't pick up a dog…" Haitani trailed off as Shirai patted his shoulder, both had waterfalls flowing out from their eyes.

"Nice?" Keitaro repeated incredulously, his eyes darted from the empty Okinomiyaki boxes behind her, to the red stain on the ceiling and finally to the porn videos scattered on the floor beside the DVD player.

"I… d- Gah!!!" Keitaro began just seconds before Haitani stuffed the neck of a sake bottle down his throat, almost drowning him.

"C'mon Keitaro, lighten up!" Haitani told him as he pulled out the bottle and slapped Keitaro's back making Keitaro spit out some of the sake forced down his throat. "Bastard, spending time with the first girl I ever liked!!!"

"It's not my fault, she was the one that followed me around!!!" Keitaro yelled back defensively

"And bragging about it too…" Shirai added

"There's only one way to settle who gets Yumiko!" Haitani declared, "A drinking contest! Shirai, bring out the sacred liquor."

"W… wait a minute!" Keitaro stammered as they forced him to sit down. Shirai then carefully placed a small bottle of liquor in between Keitaro and Haitani, poured two glasses and stepped back as though it really was sacred. Keitaro felt a strange aura floating around the bottle.

"Nobody has ever drunk more than two cups of this liquor without passing out…" Haitani told them, grimly. "So, bottoms up! Nyahahaha!"

Haitani and Keitaro drank deeply, breathed out and collapsed on the floor, unconscious. Shirai and Yumiko stared at them and finally after a few minutes of silence Shirai declared, "Super Combo Finish! KO!!! Since both of them are out of it, then I guess I get you!"

"Dream on!" Yumiko replied, sticking out her tongue, "So, what do we do now?" she asked

Shirai looked around the messy room, "We can't go to bed, the food's all gone, sake won't be a very good idea…" he muttered under his breath as his eyes scanned for something to do. "How about a video?" Suddenly, Yumiko's eyes began to twinkle and a malicious grin spread on her face. Uh oh… Shirai thought to himself Haitani warned me about this…

She began to shuffle through the CDs under the TV, flinging the ones she didn't like over her shoulder and emerged from under it with a single CD in her hand. "Play it…" she ordered him breathlessly, brushing her long yellow hair from her face with the back of her hand.

"Wait, Yumi-chan… Maybe we should…" Shirai began before Yumiko grabbed him by the collar and shook him violently pointing at the CD player. Shirai sweatdropped and replied, "Y… Yes commander…"

Shirai played the CD whilst Yumiko fumbled with the door's lock. There was a click, a gasp, a crash and Shirai was lying on his back unconscious, foam dripping from his mouth and Yumiko's shorts over his eyes.

Author's Notes:

Shirai: tears flowing out of his eyes I… I finally scored… I. Finally. Scored.

Ryuji (yes, that's me!): No, you didn't dumbass! When Yumiko flung off her shorts you passed out!

Reiko: I can't ever imagine Shirai getting some… can you?

Ryuji: Nope.

Reiko: So, how are the capoera lessons going?

Ryuji: Got bored, left a month ago.

Reiko: And yet you're still losing weight…

Ryuji: Of course I am! I ride a stationary bike for 1-2 hours a day! I would never forgive myself if I ever become fat!

Reiko: So you sleep for 8-10 hours a day, exercise for 1-2 hours, go to school for 5 hours, eat for and hour and bum around for the rest of the day?

Ryuji: Of course not! I also sleep in class when the professor gets too boring. How did you find out about my schedule anyway?

Reiko: I read some of your junk paragraphs. You think of the weirdest things to talk about in these author's notes. By the way, I notice you've changed your writing style a bit.

Ryuji: grins I've been trying to write a bit more like my brother. But it does seem better, right? I still like to rant a bit, though.

Reiko: A bit…?

The Real Notes:

Hey, everyone, sorry if the last parts seemed like they were rushed, because they were! I'll fix it if I find the time, but for now I have a few little problems to take care of (Vanity before everything else I always say. Yes, I am a vain man). I'll also be updating the Shinobu thing in a few weeks and I'll probably be posting some junk paragraphs on my homepage when I find the time. But for now I'll disappear from the writing world for a few more months. I also have to work on my main project too, It's a sci-fi original fic written by me back when I was still in the fourth grade. I finally found a feasible beginning for it so I'll just tell you all when the first chapter is done.

Summer's already over for me. And I still haven't done the dedication page for all of the people that supported me through thick and thin all through the years! --' But I'll get to it someday! But for now, thanks for everything everyone! Later!

P.S.

I liked the thing with my homepage hit counter for those that don't have the time to review. So if you can, please open my homepage so you'll show up in the hit count. It's just nice to know people are reading my stuff. Thanks

-Masayuki Haitani