"Well you go on then and marry that boy."
"No sweetheart. This ain't the graduate. You ain't no Elaine, well who knows… you might be, but I'm sure as hell am no Ben. I won't stop a wedding which was a conscious decision made by you. Or rather a big string of decisions. I won't come running and smash against those doors and scream your name again and again on top of my lungs, and stop you from marrying Edward just so that you can get an easy way out of a situation that shouldn't need an easy way out. Because you… you lady, wanted to be in this situation. If you want out, get out, but don't use me as an excuse for it."
Alex blinked away some tears and sniffed a little. She desperately tried to smile her actually I know it better than you do smile. She wanted to reply so many different and so, so important things at the same time that she almost felt embarrassed for option that her brain, or the habit, chose.
"Actually, he didn't stop the wedding. Elaine was already married when he got to her."
Her cheeks reddened whilst she could see how his jaw clenched and the simple little nod he gave her that could mean everything from a silent, resigned defeat, to a well enough to an oh wow not even in this situation you can stop doing this.
He gave her a weak smirk because deep down this need for correcting things was one of the many things he found so very endearing about her.
The thoughts ran through Alex's head like little tornados. Knowing that her comment had resulted in a dead end for this rather life changing topic, she desperately tried to figure out how to grab the loose knot of this conversation again.
So, she tried to figure out what best to say next in order to avoid the same mistake being made twice but her head didn't seem able to pack everything in coherent sentences, except for what do you want me to do. A question which was painlessly redundant because the answer for it had already been given loads of times, namely to make a decision before you marry Edward.
She wanted to ask Hooten nonetheless. She was desperate for a clue that would help her find the right decision. Or was him wanting her to make a decision already all the clues she needed? He had never said anything directly. So how could she be certain about any of the two possible directions she was heading in. Because as a matter of fact at the end of the graduate, after the smiles had faded there was also nothing else left but uncertainty.
And surely, it was clearly some level of, let's say odd, to leave the man she loved at the altar for something none of the participants were sure about. Or even sure if there *was* something to be sure about, or ever could be."
Right now, it was only tension, a lot of it, an even bigger load of irritation and an enormous shadow of uncertainty towering above feelings that were just as likely to turn out to be nonexistent after all, as they were to exist in the first place."
It was a maybe and a maybe not.
There were enough words, unsaid and unheard, but somehow unmistakably felt, to fill the whole British museum.
It was the memory of a most beautiful kiss, that had actually never happened.
Surely it would be insane to cancel a wedding for this amount of irritation and uncertainty.
Or was it?