The Beast Brothers of Remnant

Authors note: Sorry for the long hiatus been struggling to find the time to sit down and write. In addition to this chapter I'm finally going to put down the stories that I've fought up on my page. If anyone decides to take up a story idea then I would appreciate a shout out but its not necessary. I hope you guys enjoy and I'll try my best to make this chapter worth the wait.

Chapter 3

The office that Cindral laid claim too was scarcely decorated, emphasising how little time she spent in it. Always busy cooking or acting as a village diplomat Cindral didn't have much time to make use of this office, as such she usually did all her paper work on the go. Despite this her affluent position did allow some luxuries. A high backed black leather chair sat before a hardwood desk with two simpler cushioned red fabric seats for guests. Gifts from traveling merchants who once visited. As Logan and Aura wandered over to sit down on the two chairs Cindral moved over to the storage cabinet fishing three cups and a bottle of pressed berry juice before joining her small family.

"You two were a bit late today, usually you're in before the breakfast crowd." Murmured Cindral still not fully recovered from the awkward events just 2 minutes earlier. She removed the bottle's cork smiling a little at Logan's impatient gaze following her actions.

"Woulda been, but we ran into some grimm on the way over. Let the kid handle it." Growled Aura also still affected by the events, but were Cindral was awkward Aura was furious.

Logan smirked proudly forcefully changing the atmosphere in a fit to improve his two guardians moods. "Yea! Took down three beowolfs and a ursa major by myself!" Yelled the excitable boy attempting to impress his aunt.

"That right." Cindral spoke through a sudden frown glaring at her brother "Could you go get me some water from the well. The kitchens running low."

Logan saw through this obvious lie, but was not about to challenge his scary aunt. He quickly retreated slightly upset about not getting to spend more time with his aunt but knowing that he didn't want to be here if she got set off. Aura sat like a stone staring at his sister knowing exactly what she was going to say. As she turned to him staring right back with clear anger in her eyes. Both waited till Logan shut the door before Cindral started off.



Logan and Aura were walking through the forest down the path towards the village. The pair made good time keeping the pace high to get to their destination before the breakfast rush.

"Yo old man" Logan suddenly spoke out garnering his guardians attention.

"What brat" Grunted the elderly auroch as he continued to watch the forest covertly scanning for threats.

"I still don't get it. Why don't the villagers like me or Victor, they always staring or glaring, pisses me off." Questioned the boy as he stared at his old teacher.

"'Sigh' how many times I gotta explain it brat it's an old belief system that goes back to the primal age of faunus, back when some clans considered living as anything other than their animal counterpart as evil or sacrilegious." Stated the exasperated old man as he continued his explanation for what felt like the 1 thousandth time "Carnivorous clans of this type used to hunt other faunus considering them no better than deer or elk causing most of the herbivorous clans to band together to fight them off, it's how the first Faunus civilisation got started. Our clan descends from those clan and as such has a hate of carnivorous faunus set in tradition. It's also why we avoid mixed species relationships to prevent the random chance mix of creating carnivores." Stated Aura making sure to keep a good eye on Logan to make sure he didn't get hurt by the reality of his situation.

Logan looked down at the path sombrely "Yea ma and da were a mix right? Ma was a Deer and Da was a bull." Murmured Logan.

"Right, usually two faunus that are both herbivores or carnivores will birth a babe of the same type but as you and victor show there are exceptions. This is why pairings outside of clans are heavily restricted to arranged marriages to keep genetics from becoming inbred." Bluntly getting to the truth of the matter Aura looked over as Logan's head drooped in thought. He returned his eyes to the road

The elder's head twitched suddenly at a suspicious sound in the distance before he looked over at the spot that Logan had occupied.

Keyword 'had'

" 'Sigh' Damn kid and his damn ears" Grunted the annoyed elder as he moved over towards one of the trees easily spotting the small tracks where the boys feet and hands had grasped the tree. With one slight application of aura to his good leg he leaped up into the trees and began to follow his protégés tracks. As he approached he began to hear growls and bestial grunts and almost unconsciously he bled his emotions away leaving him a blank slate. This was an ancient technique of the warrior clan, a method to sneak up close to monsters who could sense emotions, and were attracted to all negative feelings and thought and had driven man and faunus kind to the brink of extinction more than once.


As he approached he quickly noticed his student sitting on a branch just ahead of him observing clearly waiting for his teacher. His own usually sparkling blue eyes blank and cold with the technique, only the slightest flash of emotion revealed his inexperience with it. The elder came to rest next to him as he joined in the observation. Three Beowolfs were scuffling in a clearing just below them, completely unaware of their two watchers. The Beowolf grimm where the cannon fodder of the grimm force, being the most numerous and most prone to grouping up. If you saw one there was almost definitely more sitting nearby, they were modelled similar to the mythical werewolves and had the fangs and claws comparable to one.

If one wondered what the grimm where doing frolicking in a field then allow me to reassure you to the intentions of this activity. The Grimm were not playing, they were training. A swipe with the claws just barely dodged, a snap of powerful jaws deliberately short of the mark to avoid damage, blunt force impacts with closed hands. The grimm where sparring to learn how to fight, these three were clearly young, with one being at most 3 years old leading the exercise. Shown by his slight mask plating. This was the advantage that social Grimm had over their stronger solitary brothers, they could learn even with no enemies nearby.

Aura and Logan simply sat observing the three monsters, before both readied themselves for combat in their own ways. Logan drew his trench knives and began rolling his shoulders limbering up to fight. Aura calmly unsheathed his axe before a slight shimmer appeared across him as he enhanced his body to counter his age granting him speed and strength comparable to him in his prime. As this shimmer completed its work the grimm below finally noticed their loss of solitude as their ears pricked up and they disengaged from one another looking for the (to their emotion based senses) invisible threats, as they were forced to work with only a slight sliver of aura and a tiny drop of escaped bloodlust from a novice.

The elder looked at his eager charge before giving a dismissive wave of his hand. That was all Logan needed as he pushed of the branch falling upon the unsuspecting grimm. He pinned one to the ground after colliding with its back before he proceeded to slit its throat causing the grimm to quickly disperse into mist. Said mist served another purpose however as it invisibly saturated Logan's clothes and skin making him visible to the other two grimm who quickly turned and lunged at the youngster.

As they neared they manoeuvred into a simple tactical lunge that had one leap over the other as they neared, both lunging at the boy attempting to stop any escape by ground or air. Only to have their movement put against them. As the two approached Logan lunged right back at them targeting the top grimm with his knives as his foot collided with the head of the lower grimm stunning it and sending it stumbling to the grass as he met the higher grimm in mid-air his other leg shoot up to crash into the lower jaw of the beast closing its mouth as his two knives sliced through its arm muscles neutralising its claws before he moved in for the kill. He slammed one knife into the beasts neck into its head even as he twisted in mid-air throwing his other knife into the recovering ground grimm's eye killing both. He pushed off the still airborne dissipating body before rolling across the ground to retrieve his other knife raising both into a ready position. The fight wasn't over yet, his ears told him so. A mighty crash resounded as more grimm entered the vicinity.

Though Logan immediately knew he was outclassed. Four Ursa class grimm rushed through the underbrush towards the young warrior. Ursa grimm where the tanks of the main grimm force, being modelled after bears they were mountains of meat and plating capable of ripping into houses. Logan knew that he couldn't fight four at a time. Not because of any lack of skill but because his body and aura weren't developed enough to take a single hit from Grimm of this size, especially since one looked to be a major, otherwise known as an elder grimm, stronger and more developed then their compatriots. As the three younger ursas rushed him the elder bear monster stalked around to the side showing experience in killing men only further sealing Logan's doom…..

If it weren't for one angry old man. Aura had been hunting Grimm since he was a boy under his father's tutorship and had killed literally hundreds of thousands of the beasts over his century long career as a warrior of the village. Three underdeveloped ursa couldn't even be called practice. With a streak of white light enveloping his form the ancient man leaped almost flying across the ground raising his axe before the awed gaze of his protégé. He reached the grimm within a second before with clenching muscles he struck. A single one handed chop with his weapon split two of the grimm into half's even as his other hand reached out and touched the final grimms neck sending a single strand of white light into its neck which wrapped around its spine and constricted shattering the vital bundles of vertebrae and nerves killing the monster. Effortless.

The Ursa Major stopped its slow advance at the arrival of this clearly much greater threat staring with uncanny intelligence at the man who had slaughtered its three peons in less than a second. Aura looked right back into the grimms familiar eyes. Blood red glowing eyes filled with the same hate that he had seen on every other grimm he had ever faced.

As Logan would say it pissed him off. He once again took off towards the grimm raising his axe for the finishing blow, the grimm reared back its paw but it wouldn't be able to strike fast enough.

If Aura was still a young man this would have been the end, but he wasn't. He was an old man who had experienced war after war after war. His body was covered in wounds from past battles both won and lost. Many would have been fatal if it wasn't for his sister's unique skills. And one of these fatal wounds now chose this time to rear its head. An arrow wound from a battle against bandits over 40 years ago back when the warrior clan boasted well over 70 members and not just two.

He had broken his aura after taking down the bandit chief and was celebrating his victory with this brothers when an arrow from a surviving bandit had struck him from behind hitting his lung. Said bandit didn't survive much longer as his long gone brothers tore him apart. But the wound would have killed him without Cindral. And now it was costing him as his rush was interrupted with a spasm in his lungs causing him to start coughing uncontrollably interrupting even his iron clad concentration. Slowing him just enough to allow the ursa major's paw to strike him head on.

His fully developed aura protected him but his impact with the ground strained his already uncontrollable respiratory organs resulting in a coughing fit that left him grounded.

"Grandpa!" Yelled Logan getting over his shock at this unexpected turn of events and rushing forward at the major drawing its attention before it could capitalise on his grandfather's current weakness. Aura attempted to yell out at his grandson but his coughing prevented it. He was forced to watch his ten year old grandson take on the clearly century old Grimm. 'Not again, please god not again' begged the coughing elder in his mind, his eyes locked on the ensuing battle.

Logan confronted the grimm face to face as the monster seemed to smirk at him in arrogance. Its paw raised up and struck forward with devastating speed and strength forcing Logan to flip himself through the air to avoid it, spinning in mid-air to strike said arm with his knives just barley cutting through the skin causing trickles of mist to spray out, angering the beast at best. The ursa let out an ear bursting roar causing Logan's ears to tuck town resulting in his hair flattening on his head before he was forced to backflip away from the beast's claws which scored four lines into the dirt. It grunted in fury at its prey's slippery nature before its eyes drifted over to the still contorting old man. It lumbered forward with deadly intent eyes locked on the elder's desperate attempts to regain his breath. It advanced towards the old warrior with clear intent to kill him at his weakest.

Logan quickly noticed the shift in attention and quickly charged the beast just before it reached the elder. Suddenly it changed its focus back towards the unprepared boy lashing out with its paw catching his left arm in its iron hard grasp before lifting him into the air.

Logan's eyes widened as he realised that the grimm had used his grandfather as bait to catch him, his aura strained to keep his arm from breaking In the monsters grip as he desperately attempted to free himself from the potentially fatal position.

The monster seemed to relish in its victory seemingly glancing at the elder out of the corner of its eye mocking him before turning its full attention to its current prey. Instead of swiping at him and potentially letting him wriggle free the old beast opened its mouth and prepared to bite down. Logan's feet flailed hitting the air as he realised the beast's intentions, in his panic he looked towards his grandfather for aid, only to see him still unable to breathe. Despite this his eyes locked on his grandsons as he pushed every ounce of support that he could through his eyes despite his own fear for the boy.

Logan stared at his grandfather the realisation that he had no help coming flashing across his eyes before he returned his attention towards the grimms rearing head.

'I need to move, but my arms trapped' Logan thought panicking as he desperately tried to find a way to either escape or at least avoid the beasts bite. 'My aura can't take a bite from this monster, its barley keeping my arm intact'

He attempted to wiggle free only for the beast to tighten its grip on him straining his aura further forcing him to cry out in pain.

'Damn it I can't get free and my arms constricting my shoulder, I can't move' Logan was truly beginning to panic now as his mind struggled to find any way to survive this. His right arm shoot up knife in hand striking the beast but he couldn't cut its leather like skin with so little momentum behind his strikes. He couldn't even twist his body into the stabs since his shoulder was constricted by its grip and anything else he had in his arsenal would take to long.

"Wait my shoulder" murmured Logan as he began to examine his trapped arm though his thoughts were left unsaid as the ursa finally sent its head forward attempting to torment Aura by biting Logan's legs off first, the cruelty of its species shown through the malignant glint in its unnatural eyes.


A little known fact about aura was that it could affect the body in any way that the user desired, it could be used to turn ones limbs into weapons or speed up ones reflexes, but this could also be used to cause damage to one's own body. Many captured huntsmen/huntresses hand used this to break their own necks while immobilised. Which eventually resulted in the creation of aura suspending cuffs.

Logan used this little known fact to his painful advantage. Dislocating is arm from the shoulder allowing him enough room to swing his body away from the approaching grimm's teeth, which chomped on air. The pain was immense and Logan barely managed to stop himself from screaming via a combination of adrenalin and willpower his eyes locked onto the beast with primal fury.

He had an opening.

With brutal force he slammed an aura enhanced foot into the grimms eye resulting in a small explosion of black mist as the ancient grimm reared back in shock and pain.

'Roaaargh' Screamed the beast as its other paw was lifted to cradle its maimed face, before its furious one eyed gaze locked back on its prey still in its grasp.

'I have one chance' The thought rushed through Logan's mind as he prepared his trench knife in his free arm, a slight outline of red appearing around it slowly starting to form into an ethereal copy of the blade hovering just above its surface. Logan prepared himself as the grimm opened its mouth, no longer seeking to maim but to instead rip his throat out in revenge. Its paw dropped from its face revealing its once glowing red eye had been replaced with a pitch black hole were only dark mist emerged. Its face rushed forward full speed attempting to end the fight before this tiny creature could harm it again.

But it had waited too long and lost its chance.

Logan reared his hand back before throwing it forward, knife held in an ice-pick grip and surrounded with an aura of bloody light. The knife which had once only scratched at the beast's skin sunk to the hilt inside its skull with a slick squelch piercing whatever black monstrosity this creature called a brain. Logan glared into the beasts remaining eye as it seemed to widen in shock.


The adrenalin rushed through him at his success causing him to unleash a primal roar of victory as he pulsed his compacted aura blade causing it to disperse in an explosion of force inside the grimms skull resulting in its entire head exploding into black mist.

As the arm that had held him released its grip Logan fell over 9 feet towards the ground to unfortunately land on his now dislocated and heavily bruised arm. He let out a strangled whimper as the pain seemed to burn through his entire left half causing him to quickly stem tears as his adrenalin rush left him leaving only pain and shaking hands.

'Damn it don't cry, this is a victory damn it.' Despite his thoughts Logan's eyes watered as he shifted onto his good side slowly sitting up onto his knees. His ears twitched as he looked over at his approaching grandfather who had finally recovered from his coughing fit. Logan quickly turned his gaze away desperately attempting to wipe away his tears with his hand before the one man he respected could see them. The elder kneeled with difficulty and caught his wards hand stopping his action.

"It's okay to cry. I did." Stated the old auroch referencing the first time that he fought an opponent beyond his abilities and was confronted with death.

Logan responded with a disbelieving gaze before his eyes seemed to water further the occasional sob escaping him as his body shook in a mix of pain and shock.

"You ready?" Questioned the elder glancing at the boys arm lying limp against his side.

Logan looked down shoring up his resolve before he nodded bracing himself as his grandfather grasped his arm.

Holding his arm straight he gave no warning before he pushed it back into its socket with a 'crack!' drawing a slight cry from the boy.

Aura leaned back on his feet as he looked at the boy that he had raised from childhood before he reached out and picked up the two knifes lying in the dirt. Handing them to Logan who sheathed them automatically wincing as sheathing the left dagger aggravated his still sore but already healing wound.

'Always was good a healing himself. Cannae help but think it's part of his semblance. Though it hasn't surfaced yet' idled the old warrior as he took in the full scope of the events.

"hahahahahaha!" The laughter was sudden and unexpected as the old auroch found himself laughing uncontrollably. Logan looked at his guardian as if he had gone mad, before the realisation began to dawn on him. The elders arm shot out making sure to avoid his left arm as he dragged the boy into a hug. His relief at Logan's not only survival, but victory against the elder ursa major was over whelming so much so that he honestly couldn't be bothered thinking about what so many social grimm being so close to the village could mean. Logan slowly began to chuckle and them laugh with his grandfather as he repeated the realisation in his head again and again.

'im alive, im alive. Im alive. IM ALIVE!'

Their laughter slowly died off as the elder raised himself up pulling the boy with him as he limped over towards his axe grasping the weapon before turning back towards his student.

"I see you finally got aura blade augmentation down" Stated the elder smiling proudly at Logan even as he absent-mindedly inspected his weapon for any damages. Returning his gaze to his protégé he calmly murmured "I think that performance was deserving of a name" Causing Logan to break out into a massive smile his eyes shining in delight at his grandfather's words.

The name was an ancient tradition of the warrior clan which was granted from master to pupil upon proving themselves ready to step out from under their master's shadow and into the world as an independent warrior. It was a way for a master to state 'you're as strong as I can make you now go find your own strength' Logan had been training for it his entire life. His older brother Victor Creed had received his from the elder a year ago and had used his new freedom to leave the village and return to society with the intention of joining the white fang to fight for the freedom of faunus. He had got the idea from a white fang member who had stumbled on the village just over 4 years ago while fleeing from grimm and vale authorities after a failed mission. He had snared Victor with his stories of fighting against the tyranny of the kingdoms to free faunus kind from fates like the Schnee family mines, whoever they were the white fang seemed to have a serious grudge against them. Propaganda thought Logan but he trusted his brother to not get into trouble, at least until Logan got his own name and could join him. And keep his ass out of trouble.

'What will it be' thought Logan as he waited in anticipation.

"To bad I can't think of anything. Oh well." Sung the elder as he turned and began using another aura technique involving reseting his aura shields in a sudden pulce to both return his aura to a calm but ready state and also disperse any lingering grimm mist from his skin and clothes deliberately ignoring Logan's indignant glare and furious growl.

"What the actual fuck old man! Ya cannae drop that shit and just leave it! I need my name to go after Victor!" Screamed the infuriated boy as his grandfather smirked at his reaction furthering his ire.

"Firstly stop swearing we're still going to Cindral's, secondly yes I can and thirdly I'm not through training you." Listed the old trainer as he smiled smugly.

"What the… You let Victor leave when he could kill 20 beowolfs without being seen, I could do that if I had a bow." Growled the still indignant boy as his anger was only slightly cooled with the elder's explanation, enough that he would wait for an extended answered before deciding just how pissed he should be.

"Victor was a stealth and assassination expert" Bluntly stated the elder before he hefted his massive axe "Not exactly my forte. By that point there was nothing that I could do to advance him further. So I let him go so that he could find strength in himself. And despite their… low status the white fang has a wide variety of stealth experts to further his education, comes with being a gorilla or terrorist organisation, and just so happens the white fang is both." Explained Aura as he watched the explanation cool Logan's anger.

" 'SIGH' alright, ok. I get it." Logan murmured despondent before quickly regaining his cheer. "That means that once you're done training me I'll be way stronger than Victor." Cheered Logan as he smiled at his trainer.

Aura smiled back before making a gesture towards Logan's clothes reminding him about the invisible mist saturating his body watching as Logan's red aura seemed to flash before black mist fell off of his body leaving him both relaxed and clean. Both continued their journey returning to the path and enjoying the sounds of nature on their way towards the village.

"By the way while we're still on the subject do you remember the warrior names? Of the last generation" Stated the elder out of the blue.

"What? Of course how could I forget?" Questioned Logan as he turned towards his teacher in confusion.

"Well you seem to keep forgetting why the villages are dicks so…." Questioned the old man as he continued along the path.

"Oy! I don't forget. It just doesn't make any sense that people who could build a village in the middle of nowhere could be so stupid." Growled the boy as he stared indignantly at the old man.

"Well either or, recite them" Demanded the elder with a brow raised in challenge.

" 'Sigh' fine, Uncle Rayford, Avalanche. Auntie Soe, Fire Flash. Uncle's Kyle and Liam, The Underdogs. Uncle Marcus, Hammer. Aunt Michele, Warper."

Aura smiled in pride stating "Got your father's generation down now close relatives: father, mother, me, Cindral and your brother." Stated the elder proud of his grandson's clear respect for their fallen brothers and sisters.

Logan smiled wistfully before reciting. " Unstoppable¸ Blitzkrieg, Aegis, Angel and Sabertooth.

Flashback end (Long one)

"So that's what happened" Finished off Aura calmly drinking his fruit drink awaiting Cindrals reaction.

Cindral appeared to be restraining herself with some difficulty. The emotions on her face were a volatile cocktail of worry, anger and pride.

"How the hell did you, Aura the Aegis get taken down by a single ursa." She murmured incredulously

Her furious glare demanded an explanation so with a sigh Aura explained.

"I'm old sister, been fighting for over 30 years before you were born and its catching up on me. If I was alone the cough wouldn't have done anything, an ursa couldn't break my shields. Something I wish I had the breath to tell Jimmy before he tried to one on one an Ursa Major close range. But he pulled through and is far stronger than before, he's touched death and fought it off. It's a neccassary part of a warrior's educati."

"Don't give me that crap!" Snarled Cindral her glare even more severe as she attempted to drill holes in Auras Soul.

"Unless you forgot I was a trainee warrior till I turned 13 and I know that the 'trial of the reaper' doesn't occur till a warrior is over 16 and unlocks their semblance. Jimmy aint either or those. And the trials done with hallucinations." Cindral continued to glare at her elderly brother. He simply sighed and looked down.

"I didn't forget. Was a damn shame when you were pulled from the clan. But we both know your semblance" Aura attempted to placate Cindral only to be interrupted.

"Is too important to risk losing to the grimm. As if I haven't heard that shit a thousand times before. I made peace with that before I turned 20. Still, don't try to pull the wool over my eyes…. 'Sigh' at least he can avoid that trial, nobody is the same afterwards."

"He won't be unchanged by this Cindral" Cautioned Aura "Bare minimum he'll be more confident and aggressive. Almost being killed brings a new perspective that the fools in the village won't be able to understand. Beating an opponent above your own abilities brings its own realisation, the villagers might get the wrong idea if they notice his new confidence might try something which will cause him to lash out. None of the villagers truly realise how close they are to death when they anger him, or me." Aura paused before he suddenly growled taking Cindral slightly off guard "God dammit! Ever since the chief's son brought that whole 'positivity only' bull-crap into the village there's an entire generation of them that's never even seen grimm, and none of them know how to fight since they refuse to allow any of the younger members to join the warrior clan. Cant say I blame them with what happened" Stated Aura unhappily admitting that the villagers had a point about not wanting to join the clan.

"Cant deny that it works though." Stated Cindral almost timidly reminding her brother of the villages lack to grimm attacks ever since the new policies were introduced. She always hated these conversations.

"Only because me and Jimmy patrol the forest, killing the few grimm that are attracted. People can't be happy all the time. The moment something goes wrong we'll be up to our arses in grimm with only two warriors, one of whom is still a child. I heard the boys wife's with child. That could be good or bad. If the birth goes wrong…. The negativity would destroy the village."

Auras countenance was that of a weary soldier who felt himself surrounded by fools. His family and clan had sacrificed almost all their numbers in the Grimm swarm that had assaulted the village 11 years ago to save it and now the very village they died for was in danger of destruction from its own idiocy. He took another drink of his juice finishing it off before looking back at his sister, who's look of worry reflected his own emotion's.

"Best go grab the brat. He'll ave caused trouble at this rate." Murmured Aura attempting to diffuse the awkward atmosphere that had been brought in by his pessimism.

"Yea best get back to work. Kitchen will go to chaos without me." Murmured Cindral not meeting her brother's eyes. As he rose and walked out the back door from her office to avoid the stares from the villagers he had long started to resent.

Cindral sighed before standing from her desk looking over at a cabinet in the corner of her office which held her longbow from her training days. Before moving back towards the exit into the main hall where the villagers continued to eat their meals before leaving to their assigned duties. She moved off towards the kitchen thinking about her one-sided conversation with her brother.

It was hard for her to discuss the new status quo. On one hand she herself was a civilian and had lived her entire adult life without being exposed to the evils of the world without someone being there to fight it off for her. On the other hand she was once an aspiring warrior who was only denied entrance to the clan because of her semblance of healing. The reason her name, the last gift from the clan before she was removed and made a civilian, was angel. Her semblance had limits, its reliance on her own physical vitality being the most prominent. This also meant that it had invariably weakened with age.

She could once heal three people from a state near death before she collapsed. Now just healing one would push herself halfway over that same edge. She had simply been forced to prioritise, heal what would kill a person and leave what would heal on its own. But as time went on the things she had to push to the side when healing had become larger and larger. As she had learned to her shame almost 11 years ago.