Author's Note: So, idk where this came from, but here it is. Blackavar is trans in this. The Watership rabbits are cool with it, and treat him like any other buck. They're down with any queer bunnies. For any of y'all unfamiliar with Lapine: 'Silflay' means 'to feed above ground'. 'Marlao' means 'mating time'. 'Owsla' means 'a group of favored rabbits who protect the Chief Rabbit and his doe and exercise authority'. '-Rah' means 'Chief, lord, prince, or leader. It can also be an honorific applied especially to Chief Rabbits'. 'Embleer' means 'stinking. It is also used as a swear word, the equivalent of 'damned''. This is p fluffy. Anyway, I haven't published anything in a while due to personal reasons. I can't promise that this is my big return. Idk when I'll start cranking out fics again. But here's this in the meantime. Title is taken from a line in the book. WARNING: This fic contains implied violence, sexism, transphobia, mentions of murder, mentions of death, implied sex, and implied pregnancy.
When Blackavar was brought before the council after attempting to escape, he stared up at them. He was determined that Woundwart see the despair and hatred that nearly every rabbit in Efrafa felt. The General, if he recognized the look in the young rabbit's eyes, didn't respond to it. The black buck remembered, with a jolt of cold pain, his mother's words when he proposed that he join the Efrafan Owsla.
"You're a beautiful doe, Blackavar. Does don't belong in the Owsla."
Blackavar was a kitten, oddly black, unlike most of the wild rabbits in Efrafa. He was only two months old, and had already learned that he was strange by others' standards. One morning, when his mark went out for silflay, he saw another kitten, one he'd never met before. Always eager to make friends, he slowly approached her.
"Hello. My name is Blackavar. I haven't met you before."
The dark brown kitten turned from her patch of clover to face him. Blackavar was slightly struck by her dazzling eyes.
"My name is Hyzenthlay. I didn't know there were any other does our age in this mark."
Blackavar twitched his nose in slight annoyance. "I'm not a doe. I'm a buck." He expected her to protest, and tell him "No. Don't be ridiculous. You're a doe."
"Oh, my mistake," She replied. "Would you like to share this clover with me?"
When Blackavar met Thlayli, it was during the worst time in his life. He was being shown off to every mark at silflay, and expected to be killed afterward.
"Aren't you going to silflay?"
"I don't silflay at this time, sir."
The black rabbit looked up, tentatively, and saw pity in the large buck's eyes, as his guard explained why he was there. He had to fight not to perk up. If there was any good in any of the Efrafan officers, maybe they would be able to help Hyzenthlay, Thethuthinang, Vilthuril, and the others. Even if they couldn't escape, maybe their lives could be bearable. Blackavar didn't believe it, but he wanted to.
"Strawberry, this is Blackavar. He's come with us out of Efrafa," Hazel-rah was explaining to a fat reddish-brown buck.
"Good for him!" The buck, Strawberry replied happily.
Blackavar didn't stray from Hazel-rah's side during the rest of their conversation. He smelled and stared at the buck his new chief was talking to. He wasn't used to other bucks being anything but embleer, until meeting Thlayli. He was still getting used to enjoying their company.
Soon enough, marlao came along on the down. Bucks and does were playing and mating together, enjoying each others' company. Blackavar was sitting and enjoying an evening silflay. Clover, currently between being mated, joined him. She nuzzled him gently, affectionately. He returned the gesture, contentedly. During his short time on Watership Down, the two black rabbits had become very close.
Blackavar nibbled on a dandelion, as his companion left him again, to return to the other bucks of the warren. He felt lonely. He may be a buck, but he still had to deal with marlao, just like the does. The other bucks seemed so determined to treat him like any other buck, that they hadn't tried to mate with him. He appreciated their intention, but found it ultimately frustrating.
Just as the black buck was going to return to his burrow, he smelled another rabbit, Strawberry, the awkward, yet endearing buck with a long-dead doe, approaching. The red buck twitched his nose, obviously smelling that it was mating time for the other. Blackavar nuzzled the larger buck in reply.
The following month found the black buck nursing his kittens, his mate snug against him in their burrow. Blackavar licked at his four newborn kittens. There were three bucks, and one doe. He was tired, but happy. Strawberry licked at his ears, trying to express his happiness. Blackavar laid his head down to doze with his family, completely content.