Disclaimer: NigHtEyeZ does not own Saiyuki.

AN: My second Saiyuki fic! Thanks for the support on 'Innocent Eighteen'! Although I think chapter five is really too much… ^  ^;; Onto the new fic!!


Mou kechi – Goku's way of calling Sanzo a meanie.

~*~*~ This Time ~*~*~

Cho Hakkai stepped out into the bright sunlight and stretched his arms in the air while making a satisfied yawn. He dropped his arms back to his side as his emerald eyes darted around his surroundings. It was going to be a fine day, he could tell by the looks of the clear morning sky.

A small grin emerged as Hakkai thought about the weird scene he had seen earlier on inside the inn. Goku, the young boy had been sleeping soundly. In fact, he was snoring away. A certain blond-haired monk ain't having such luck though. Sanzo frowned in his sleep, turning and tossing uncomfortably. And what have made Sanzo-sama so uncomfortable? It was actually the tight grasp of his lover, Goku's arm around his waist.

Hakkai would have never thought Sanzo and Goku had turned out to be a couple in a million years. It was sudden and awkward at the same time. He couldn't imagine how their relationship changed from a master and a pet to inseparable lovers. But all the same, he sincerely congratulates them.

A cold chill shot up Hakkai's body as his sixth sense told him someone was watching him. Being alert, he caught the culprit almost immediately. There, a little further up the lane was a worn out bench. A huge tree stood mightily behind it, providing shade to the person sitting on the bench. He was a weird looking old man. His small fragile body covered up with a black robe that seems too big for him.

Hakkai walked closer, determine to find out who is that old man. He had a face full of beard; Hakkai couldn't decide if it was blond or white coloured. Dark sunglass hides his eyes, but Hakkai trusted his sixth sense. The old man was staring at him.

"Can I help you, sir?" Hakkai put on his one-in-a-million smile and asked carefully. The old man doesn't seemed to be surprised, he patted the seat beside him with a wrinkled, old hand, mentioning for Hakkai to sit, which the young man did.

"Are you sure you can help me?" The old man croaked as if he had not talked for ages. Hakkai did not answer him, but the old man continues without hearing Hakkai's answer anyway. "I want you to stop Sanzo from going out to buy cigarettes today."

Hakkai's eyebrows were tied into a knot. Questions bombed his brain, he was not sure which to ask first. [Who is this man? How does he know Sanzo? Why is he sure Sanzo is going out today? To buy cigarettes?] Of course, being a calm person, Hakkai asked what matters most. "If you don't mind, I would like to hear a good reason for me to do so." Respect your elders is what Hakkai do best.

The old man almost smiled a toothy grin. But the smile did not appear. "I have a good reason. Or story to be precise. Do you have the time to listen, Hakkai?" Once again, the old man took Hakkai by surprise. He wanted to ask how did this man know his name. But all Hakkai did was nod his head solemnly. What he was about to hear, truly amazed him.

~*~*~ STORY ~*~*~

"Ne Sanzo! I wanna go too!!" Goku wailed while hanging on his master's robe like a little monkey. Sanzo had a vein throbbing on his forehead. He shoved Goku's hands away in annoy.

"Urusai, baka saru." First thing in the morning, Sanzo was in a bad mood, all because he ran out of cigarettes. And the stupid monkey had been strangling his waist the whole night! Watching Goku pout, Sanzo rolled his eyes. He asked himself again why did he get involved with this saru? Correction, did he really love Goku? The scary thing was that Sanzo was not sure at all. "What are you looking at?" Sanzo turned his attention to the emerald-eyed man watching the show he and Goku were putting on.

Hakkai smiled a smile that can even put the brightness of the sun into shame. "Please!! I promise to behave! I won't ask for anything." Goku grabbed the hems of Sanzo's robe again, pleading and begging with the puppy golden eyes of his.

"No." Tired of wasting his breath, Sanzo freed himself from Goku's grasp and walked past Hakkai. "Keep that baka saru away from me." Sanzo said, loud enough for Goku to hear. Of course Hakkai knows what Sanzo really means. [Take care of Goku for me.]

Clearly, Goku was not so smart to realize that. Seeing his beloved guardian walking away rapidly, he puffed up his cheeks and crossed his arms in front of his chest. "Mou kechi!!!" Goku yelled, hoping Sanzo would at least turn back and thwack him on the head with the infamous paper fan. Sanzo did not look back. He just kept walking.

Goku lowered his head, staring at the ground miserably. He reminds Hakkai of an unwanted child. Pitying Goku's simple mind, Hakkai petted his head. Gazing at Hakkai with his adorable honey-coloured orbs, Goku bit his lower lips. "Why don't we get back into the inn? I'll prepare breakfast. Since Sanzo isn't here, you can have his share."

Food always cheers Goku up. And sure enough, the thought of breakfast made Goku drool hungrily. He had to pull Hakkai back into the inn. Hakkai proves to be Goku's favourite person, right after Sanzo of course.



The monk's footsteps stopped abruptly. He looked around but only saw the heads of crowded citizens walking all around him. The new packet of cigarettes clutched tightly in his hand as Sanzo took another brief glance of his surrounding. Finally agreeing that he was thinking too much, the cause of not enough shuteyes, Sanzo continued to walk.

"Didn't you hear me?"

This time Sanzo was sure he wasn't hearing voices. That familiar yet annoying person's voice came from the dark alley on Sanzo's left side. "What do you want?" Sanzo asked him in a cool and clam tone although he was dying to take out his gun and fire all six bullets at Homura.

"What do I want?" Homura repeated the question. The fighting god ginned slyly and turned to walk deeper inside the alley. "I have what YOU want." Homura's cape disappeared into darkness, Sanzo had no choice but to follow him. It wasn't everyday your enemy, a fighting god, appears with no reasons.


No words were spoken as the two men took a stroll into a deserted part of the town. Homura lead the way with Sanzo behind him at the distance of at least five steps. Not a soul was to be seen on the empty street. Sanzo hesitated when Homura entered an old temple's compound. For a moment there, Sanzo realized it was all so ridiculous. Just why the fucking hell was he following Homura around like a dog? He has better things to do.

But Sanzo's legs wouldn't heed his command; he entered behind Homura just the same. They walked pass rows of large, old trees with their leaves falling like snow every time a breeze blew by. The sounds of rustling leaves and chirping birds died down instantly as they came closer to the temple. Sanzo assumed it was abandon for more than ten years judging the cobwebs hanging by the main entrance.

The coat of its once bright red coloured paint had long peel off. Not one bit of sunshine could be found inside this temple. Homura entered first. The wooden floor squeaked from his weight as darkness envelopes him. Dust tickled Sanzo's nose, the monk tried his best not to sneeze. He also tried to stay focus on the purple cape flickering palely in the dark. As soon as Sanzo's eyes could adjust themselves in the dark, Homura had stopped in front of a closed sliding door.

"Why did you bring me here?" What Sanzo really wanted to ask was what is hidden behind the door. Homura turned to face him. His cape brushed the floor gently, slightly revealing his one and only sword.

"There's something I want to show you." Homura said gleefully like a kid getting ready to play hide and seek. Excitement flashed by in his gold, blue eyes. "Something that you have always wanted."

There were a couple of things Sanzo could agreeable 'want' in this life. He wants people to stop bothering him (especially a certain cockroach, monkey and smiling man), he wants to have unlimited supplies of cigarettes and beer, he wants this stupid mission to end and he wants to know why he thinks differently every time Goku was involved.

So that's about it, what could he, the great Genjo Sanzo possibly want more? Nothing. "If that is all you have to say, save the surprise. I don't need it." Sanzo was about to make a quick exit. After a few steps, he froze when he heard the door sliding open.

Sanzo turned to see Homura leaning against the wall. Homura expected this. He probably predicted how tempting this was to Sanzo. "Take a look. It won't kill you." There was something hidden in his voice when he said the word 'kill'.

Staring at Homura in doubt, Sanzo slowly made his way towards the opened room. Sanzo realized how right Homura was as his violet eyes widen with shock.


"Sannzzzoooo…" Goku whined softly and sighed in depress. He was sitting on the small steps in front of the inn with his chin propped on top of his palm. When did the bright morning turned into a grey afternoon? And why isn't his beloved guardian back? As always, Goku was worried he did something that made Sanzo angry.

A cold drop of water hits his lap. "Eh?" Goku stared up at the sky and was suddenly attacked by millions of water drop. He squinted to avoid the raindrops from hitting his eyes directly. But Goku didn't move an inch either from that.

It was Hakkai whom ushered Goku back into the inn that day, assuring the boy that Sanzo would be all right, that the monk was waiting under a shelter for the rain to stop. In truth, Hakkai wasn't the least bit sure.


"Komyo Sensei!" Sanzo rushed into the room where a pale man lay unconsciously in what seems to be a straw bed. It was his master. Who should be dead for a very long time. Sanzo held the man's hand. It wasn't a hallucination; the hand Sanzo touched was real as anyone else's. But it was cold and the man wasn't breathing. "Why are you doing this? What do you want from me?!" Seeing his master again truly shaken Sanzo's nerves badly.

"Aren't you happy?" Homura entered the room with one step. He stayed at his place, without moving a single muscle. "I bet you'd be happier if your beloved master is alive and well again."

For a moment there, everything paused. Sanzo digested what the fighting god had told him little by little. He know he must not act harshly, he know this was Homura's trick. Looking at his master's feature, Sanzo know he could never decline the offer of bring Komyo Sanzo back to life. "As I said before, you bastard. What do you want from me?"

Genjo Sanzo had just made the biggest mistake in his life.


Sanzo returned. Wet from head to toe. With water still dripping, he ignored the calls of Goku and went straight into the room. It had been three hours since Sanzo locked himself in the room without food or water. It also had been three hours since Goku positioned himself, sitting outside Sanzo's room.

"Goku." The boy lifted his head to see Hakkai handing him a silver tray of food. "Could you help me pass this to Sanzo?" Goku nodded solemnly and took the tray. For once, he wasn't interested in drooling at food. He knocked the door twice.

"Sanzo? Can I come in?" Goku was half expecting a paper fan to emerge when the door creaked open. When it didn't, he bravely pushed open the door and went inside. Sanzo was sitting on a wooden chair, lighting his cigarettes and staring at the floor. His messy bed proved that Sanzo had been sleeping all this time.

Goku slide the tray on the table and took a seat beside Sanzo, announcing that he is not leaving until Sanzo told him what is his problem. The room stayed quiet for a while, with Sanzo smoking and Goku trying to read his guardian's mind. There was a lot going on Sanzo's head that Goku didn't know. Finally, Sanzo made a decision.

"Goku…" The boy perked up at the call of his name. He smiled innocently at Sanzo. Which made words harder for Sanzo to say. "I need your…help." Was his decision even right? He doubts it. But once a decision is made, he could never turn back.

"What is it?" Goku's smile didn't decreased, even if he knows Sanzo was acting weirdly.

Sanzo asked himself whether he was sure about this. He wasn't. "No. Nothing. Just forget about it. Get out." He couldn't do this to Goku. He just couldn't.

"But I want to help!" Goku grabbed Sanzo's hands. "I don't want to see you like this! I'll do anything to help!" The current 'Sanzo' was scaring Goku. What happen to the usual Sanzo?

The man stared lazily at the bronzed coloured hands on his. With a lifeless voice, he accepted Goku's offer. One part of him wanted to stop this ridiculous game, the other part of him was selfish, he would do all it takes to achieve his goal.


Goku looked around the place Sanzo had brought him to. They left the inn at the middle of the night; everyone was sound asleep when they left. Somehow, this place frightens Goku. He held onto Sanzo's robe to ease his uneasiness. "Ne Sanzo, what are we doing here in a temple?"

Sanzo slapped Goku's hand away. "You'll know that soon. And don't grab my robes like that!" As mean as he sounded, Sanzo's conscious was eating him alive. He understands what he was about to do may push Goku off the edge.

"Mou… Sanzo no kechi!" Goku muttered.

They reached their destination soon. "Finally. I thought you've changed your mind and decided not to come." Homura uncrossed his arms; his eyes seemed to gleam in the dark.

"Homura!" Goku stood protectively in front of Sanzo, wondering why the heck their enemy was here. If Homura dared to touch Sanzo, Goku will make sure he pays dearly. He was in shock when Sanzo pushed him to Homura. "S-Sanzo…?" Goku looked back at his guardian in disbelieve.

"He's all yours." Sanzo said in his not-my-business voice. Homura smiled and clasped his hand on Goku's shoulder, which the young boy shrugged off roughly. Goku was frantic by now. He doesn't understand what is happening here. With confused eyes, he asked Sanzo to explain. "Didn't you say you'd do anything to help me?"

That struck some sense into Goku's head. "Yes, I did." He was afraid of what Sanzo might say next. "But…"

"Don't ask me why." Sanzo cut off his sentence. "I want you to do whatever Homura wants you to do." [In other words have sex with Homura.] Sanzo shoved Goku towards Homura again. For a brief second, yes, one second, Sanzo wanted to take Goku's hand and pull him back. But he restrained himself. [Please yell at me. Please beat the crap out of Homura. Please… don't let me have my way.]

After a bewilder moment, Goku had an expression like he wanted to cry. He didn't. All he did was muster a bitter smile. "Hai." Goku disappeared inside a room with Homura behind. And it was then that Sanzo realized he'd rather see Goku cry than seeing that betrayed expression on his boyish face.


The door shut behind him. Goku stood still, allowing those disgusting hands of Homura to explore his body. He clutched his hands into fist when Homura started kissing his neck. Scared. He was scared. Not because he knows what is going to happen soon. Thank god his first time had been with Sanzo.

The kissing stopped. "Aren't you going to fight back?" There was some sort of disappointment in his tone as Homura started to unbuckle Goku's belt. The boy didn't reply. In fact, he pushed Homura's hands away and unbuckled his belt by himself. "Aren't you scared? Don't you hate him for doing that to you?"

Golden eyes of blankness stare at him. "This is what he wants." Homura looked confused. Repeating what he said with a little more information, Goku felt defeated. "This is what Sanzo wants me to do." There is only one way to describe what is he thinking. Goku will obey Sanzo.

The confusion had left Homura's face, replaced by amusement. He laughed aloud; Goku's loyalty to Sanzo was amazing. But then, he had better things to do then laugh. He held Goku's arms with two hands. "If that is so, you've saved me a lot of time and strength." With that, he crushed his lips onto Goku's.

That night, after all the torture and humiliation, Goku was never the same.


Sanzo sat by his unconscious master's side. He had been sitting there like a statue ever since Goku went inside another room with Homura. The sliding door suddenly opened behind him. Homura walked in with a satisfied face. "You have been keeping a wonderful creature for yourself, Konzen. The way he screams for you while I fuc…"

"You better watch what you're saying." Sanzo shot him a death glare and resisted the urge to punch Homura's perfect feature. "Did you tell him anything about…" He trailed off, dreading if Goku knew how he was being used.

"Don't worry, your sweet little pet doesn't know a thing. Well, a god always keeps his end of a deal." He walked towards where Komyo Sanzo laid. Placing two fingers on the man's forehead, bright lights blinded Sanzo's vision. When it was over, Homura was nowhere to be found.

Sanzo quickly held his master's hand. It was warm. And the man was breathing.


After all these years, Sanzo, for once had a good night rest. Without worrying of any youkai's attacking him or without worrying the sound of the rainy atmosphere outside. Just because his master was back. That was all he cares.    

It was like a never-ending dream when he felt someone stroking his hair. Komyo Sanzo smiled naturally and called his name with that voice which had haunted Sanzo for so many years. 'Koryu.'

Sanzo laid his head on his master's lap just like he used to when he was young and using the entire day, he told his master what had been happening starting from the day they were attacked by robbers.

He left the temple unwillingly as it was getting late. Sanzo promised his master that he would be back later, bringing some food and water for him. It was time to face another problem. Facing Son Goku.


"Ah! Welcome back!" Goku yelled when he saw Sanzo walking back from far. He ran towards the monk and flung his small body onto Sanzo's, giving the man a huge hug. Behind came Hakkai following close by.

"Sanzo!" Hakkai came to a halt from his slow jog. "Where had you been since this morning? Goku and I had been so worried!"

Sanzo was in lost of words. What was he supposed to tell Hakkai? That he was selfish enough to use Goku? That Homura brought his master back to live? None of those above seemed to be the right thing to say. Goku interrupted his thought. "Ne Hakkai, I bet Sanzo must be as hungry as I am. Can we have our dinner?"

"Hai, hai!" Hakkai responded cheerfully. He went back into the inn first to find out is their enough food for Goku's huge appetite. As soon as he was out of sight, Sanzo freed himself from Goku.

"Why didn't you tell him?" He asked, wondering why is he so angry about. "Why didn't you tell Hakkai what I…" Sanzo's violet eyes caught some red marks on Goku's neck. "What is this?" He reached out to pull Goku's scarf away but Goku dodged. "Stay still!" Sanzo managed to get a good look of the blurry handprint on Goku's neck.

With a deadly voice, he asked Goku. "He hurt you didn't he?" Goku did not answer but avert his view from Sanzo's demanding eyes. He didn't need to answer, Goku's face had already told Sanzo how rough Homura is with him yesterday night. "Why that bastard…"

"Ano, Sanzo." Goku rubbed his nose before looking at his guardian again. "That was the last time. It wouldn't be repeated again, would it?" It hurts Sanzo to hear this from an innocent boy. Goku sounded different. He lost some of his innocent to wicked men named Homura and Sanzo.

"Goku!!" There was somebody calling him from the inn.

"Hai!!" Goku gave Sanzo one last sad look before pretending to be his usual cheery self, running back to enjoy his meal. Whoever that called Goku, Sanzo was grateful, for he had no answer for Goku's heart wrenching questions.


From outside the old temple, the sound of a glass breaking can be heard, follow by the shouting of a man.

"Komyo Sensei!!" Sanzo held his master in his arms as the elder man breathed raggedly for air while clutching his chest. He was in pain and Sanzo had no idea what to do. Komyo Sanzo suffered for a few minutes before going into unconsciousness.

Sanzo calmly put his master onto the straw bed then making his way out of the temple, determine to find the bastard, Homura. Days went on perfectly quiet. Everything was well. Hakkai did not suspect anything even when Sanzo started to spend a lot more time outside.

Goku however, had become quiet. He was still the same high-spirited and hungry boy, but he was different when Sanzo was alone with him. His changes were clear, and Sanzo did not have the rights to blame him.

"Homura, you bastard." Sanzo mumbled while walking out of the temple.

"You called?"

Sanzo halted abruptly. He had forgotten that Homura is a god. And god normally knows the right time to appear. "Yeah, you fucking bastard. What's wrong with Komyo Sensei?!" Sanzo pointed his gun at Homura, shooting three shots in one go. He knows guns were of no use when it comes to a god. He just wanted to shot the bastard's face.

"Temper, temper, Konzen." Homura laughed, pushing Sanzo's smoking gun downwards. "Your master just needs some recharge." And of course, there's no such thing as the word 'free'.


"So we meet again, Son Goku." Homura grin ever so evilly. "So what did Konzen said this time to make you agree?" The last time they've met, the room was too dark for his liking, so Homura purposely chose a bright afternoon for sex.

"None of your business." Sanzo did not 'say' anything to him this time. He had left a note, telling Goku to go to the old temple; Homura will be waiting for his arrival. Goku don't know what he felt. What would he feel if someone he loves asked him to have sex with another man? Worse, a fighting god? Worst, an enemy?

"Fine with me. As long as you satisfy my needs, I won't waste my time talking." Homura had prepared some 'surprise' for his toy monkey today.


It had been months. Sanzo did not resume the journey to the west. But no one is complaining. For Sanzo, the main reason for not leaving was his master. How would Komyo Sanzo travel without being noticed by his other companions?

For months, Komyo Sanzo had fallen into comma a few times every week. And every time he needs to be 'recharged' Goku would be in use. How many times the boy had been brutally torn up, Sanzo did not know. Nor did he want to know.

"Koryu?" Komyo Sanzo touched his hand lightly, calling for his attention. "I don't think I want to live anymore." Well, that had certainly caught Sanzo's attention. Before he could ask why, his master had already answered him. "That boy, Goku. Every single day I stay alive, he is suffering."

Sanzo paused, deciding what to say to assure his master. "Every single day you're gone, I'm suffering too." Komyo Sanzo shook his head.

"Don't the boy mean anything to you?"

"No." Sanzo did not hesitate when he said this, anything to keep his master away from death. Komyo Sanzo sighed and shook his head again. There was a soft bump from outside the room, both of their heads turned to look at the sliding door that was slightly ajar. "Who's there?" Sanzo got up and opened the door. No one was there.


He was shaking all over. Trembling from head to toe. Confused, scared and angry. Hiding in a dark corner, Goku covered his ears, trying to stop the voices shouting in his head. A little whimper escaped his mouth as he squatted and gritted his teeth tightly. He forced his wide opened eyes to squeeze shut, hoping the images will shut away as well.

[There must be a reason.] He felt like he ate the wrong food and his stomach was hurting like hell. [He didn't mean a word he said.] Gritting his teeth wasn't enough. Soon Goku tasted blood because of biting his lower lips too hard. [He promised to keep Homura away from me.]

As if that was the final thought, Goku released every emotion in him. Tears rolled down his cheeks as he utter a few soft chokes. Why did it ended up this way? [Sanzo.]


Days go on slowly and painfully. Goku still trusted his master, obeying Sanzo's every command and accomplishing it. Even though deep down, Goku knew why Sanzo is treating him this way. He allowed himself to be used. Half was because he owns everything to Sanzo and half because he loves that man.

Why can't Sanzo see how badly he's hurting the boy? The tortures Goku went through was enough to be compared with the long period he was stuck inside a cave. 

Bless the kid, because his nightmares are finally going to be over.


Seeing Sanzo walking towards him was like seeing a bullet firing directly at him. He wanted to get as far away as he could from Sanzo. Goku stepped backwards until his back hits the wall. There was no escaping now. Sanzo was right in front of him. "S-Sanzo? No… not again. Please…" His golden eyes darted at the closed door frantically. [Hakkai. Please save me.]

"Shh… don't worry." Sanzo placed a finger on Goku's lips. "I won't hurt you anymore." The pair of violent eyes stared at Goku intensely. Sanzo's lips replaced his finger. Goku blinked twice before closing his golden orbs and then wrapping his arms around Sanzo's back. Goku was once again reminded how sweet and gentle Sanzo's kisses were. It had been a long time since Sanzo even bother about visiting Goku.


"How is he?"

Goku slit his eyes open wearily. He remembered Sanzo pinning him down on the bed, tearing his clothes and throwing it carelessly on the floor and how passionate he was the whole night. His face turned red as he remembered the sexy look Sanzo had.

"Should be all right. I didn't wear him out." Came Sanzo's voice. It was then Goku noticed there was another person in the room. He had his back facing the two people. And Goku's heart pumped hard as he recognized the voice. Homura.

"Whatever. Just make sure he doesn't make any fuss without you around. He'll give me a headache." Steady footsteps aroused, the door clicked close, announcing the departure of Homura. Goku sat up slowly, the blanket fell onto his lap, revealing his bronze coloured chest.

Sanzo was seated by the round table. He was already fully dressed and was smoking a cigarette. He was not surprised when he saw Goku staring blankly at him. "You're awake." Sanzo said it using his normal cold voice, the one that Goku hated. "I guess you've heard what Homura said. You're going to stay with him from tomorrow onwards."

Goku didn't know what he was feeling that moment. He just got up from bed, naked, and started to wear his clothes. "I'll explain it to Hakkai and Gojyo. We'll visit you now and then…" Sanzo kept talking like he was Goku's secretary. "You don't have to worry about the journey…"

"No." Goku straighten his shirt. And kept his blank stare at Sanzo. "No, I'm not going to leave with Homura."

Sanzo was shocked for a while there. He put out the fire on his cigarette, stood up and walked towards Goku. "What are you saying?" He asked carefully. Homura had made a final deal with him. Give him Goku and he will keep Komyo Sanzo permanently alive. "Goku, is there anything wrong." He was afraid of this. This was the first time Goku ever disobey him.

As if he heard something funny, Goku laughed. Then he stopped, staring hard at Sanzo, trying to find out the reason why did he have to put it up with this man. "Anything wrong? Everything is wrong. Since the day you push me to Homura, everything's wrong."

"Goku, I-" Sanzo started but he was interrupted.

"I know. I know about Sanzo's master. I know you had to use me to keep him alive. I know you have lied to me every time you said 'this will be the last time'!!" That was the last straw. Goku had a clear vision of what he was seeing. This was not the Sanzo he loves, it's just a selfish bastard who doesn't care about his life or death.

"Why did you use me?! Why did you lie? Why did I love you??" Goku paused to suck in a deep breath from all the questioning. He was already crying by now. "I hate you." Goku bend down his head, letting tears fall onto the floor.

"Goku." Sanzo wonder why does he felt so depress of seeing the boy crying. Is it still too late for him to find out all his wrongs? Taking Goku into his embrace, Sanzo spoke from his heart. "I'm sorry." They stayed like that until Sanzo felt the trembling of Goku's shoulder stopped.

After letting Goku go, the boy was more or less his usual self again. Goku wiped his tears with the back of his hands and smiled at Sanzo. "I'm sorry too. I didn't mean it when I said I hate you. I know how important your master is." He turned and walked towards the door. Before he left, Goku spoke to Sanzo again. "I'm going to wash my face." He shut the door silently.

Sanzo seated himself back onto the chair. Thoughts flooded his head. He was awake of all those ridiculous and selfish things he did to Goku. He will put things right, he made a solemn promise to himself. For Goku's sake, he will make everything right again. Searching for another cigarette up his sleeve, Sanzo had a sudden realization. He actually loves that baka saru.

Shaking his head to get that thought out, Sanzo kept fishing for his cigarette and lighter. Then his face turned pale. His gun was missing. [Isn't there a bathroom INSIDE the room?] He remembered how Goku held his hands instead of his back or waist earlier just now. Just the right position to sneak up his sleeve and take…

Sanzo jumped off his chair and ran crazily outside the inn. [Oh fuck!]


"GOKU!!!!" The boy ran even deeper into the forest when Sanzo came close. It was like they were having a race. Twigs and branches scraped Sanzo's face, a couple of huge rocks threaten to trip him if he wasn't careful enough. But Sanzo had all his attention to the boy running in front. "Stop running! Goku!!"

It wasn't until a full ten minutes before they entered a clearing that Goku finally stopped. Sanzo was out of breath; he bent his back forward, trying to catch his breath. Sweat matted his blond hair and his face red from the running. "Go-Goku."

Time froze. Goku had Sanzo's spirit ascending gun in his hand and he had the nozzle aimed at his temple, just below a strand of his brown locks. "Do you think saying sorry is enough for what you put me through?" Goku had grown up, all his innocent gone completely.

"Don't do anything stupid, baka saru!" Sanzo yelled out of frustration. He took a step towards Goku.

"Stay where you are!" Goku warned as he too took a step back. "I'm scared, Sanzo. Very scared." He understands what he was about to do is going to be painful. Painful or not, he had to do it.

"Then don't do it! Come on, I'll take you back, we can ask Hakkai to prepare food for you." Sanzo tempted Goku. He was a cold-blooded monk, but everything's different once it comes down to Goku. Maybe Goku DID matter more than his master. "I won't let Homura touch you again, just give me my gun."

Goku shook his head. "I felt dirty, Sanzo." He said quietly, tear brimmed in his golden eyes. "I feel so dirty after Homura…" Sanzo could particularly feel Goku's pain. "You can't use me anymore if I'm gone."

"Then shoot me as well." Sanzo cut off Goku, making the kid stare at him with widen eyes. "If you're going to hell, I might as well follow you."

"Why do you have to lie again? You don't love me and we both know that. If I had another choice, I wish I never met you! I'd rather be cage inside that dark cell!!!" Goku had enough of the lies he was hearing. It was time.


A sound small but it seemed too loud to the both of them. [This is the end.]

"Ne, Sanzo. Can you tell Hakkai and Gojyo I'm sorry to leave first?" Tears were pouring out of Goku's golden eyes.

"No!! I won't!! Because you aren't going to pull the trigger!!" First time in his life, the great Genjo Sanzo had tears running down his cheeks. Goku. His pet, his friend and the person he love, was saying his last request. "Goku… please… don't…"

Goku smiled, the last sunshine, cheery smile that will haunt Sanzo forever. "Mou…" His finger squeezed the trigger slowly.


The gunshot sent numerous of birds to soar into the bright blue sky. Sanzo watched as Goku dropped onto his knees before collapsing lifelessly on the ground. Sanzo walked towards him with weak legs wanting to collapse down themselves. He knelt down beside the small body and with shaking hands, turned Goku over.

Every detail breaks his heart as well as his senses. There were fresh tearstains on Goku's cheeks, mixing with the fresh blood oozing out from the bullet wound on his temple. He looked like he was sleeping. But those golden eyes will never be open again. Sanzo hugged Goku's warm body, calling the boy's name over and over again. It was too late. Goku was gone without knowing how deeply Sanzo had loved him.

~*~*~ End of Story ~*~*~

"Sanzo had lost both his master and his lover that day." The old man stopped talking, informing Hakkai the story ends here. Hakkai studied the man's feature. He looks very familiar.

"Would you mind taking off your sunglass?" Hakkai hoped he didn't sound too rude, as the old man did not make any movement. "I'm sorry if I said the wrong…" The old man lifted his hand and took off his sunglasses naturally. Hakkai gazed into the bright violet eyes of the old man. "S-San…"

"Oi, Hakkai!" A voice called his name from behind, Hakkai turned his head to see Sanzo walking towards him. "I was looking for you."

"Sanzo, there's a man here…"

Sanzo lifted an eyebrow. "What man?" Hakkai turned and the old man was nowhere to be seen. "Whatever. I'm going out. Take care of Goku."

A figure ran out of the building in full speed. "Sanzo!!!"

"Ch'." Sanzo muttered but Hakkai could see a grin almost forming out on his face. The figure hung onto Sanzo's robe like a little monkey.

"Ne Sanzo! I wanna go too!!" Goku whined as Sanzo slapped his hands away.

"Urusai, baka saru." Sanzo cursed. Hakkai watched them in amazement. It was exactly how the old man told him. "What are you looking at?" Sanzo asked him.

"Please!! I promise to behave! I won't ask for anything." Once again, Goku grabbed Sanzo's sleeve. Begging and pleading at the same time.

"No." Sanzo shoved Goku away. He walked towards Hakkai. "Keep that baka saru away from me." Goku pouted and crossed his arms.

Sanzo was stopped as Hakkai grabbed his arm. Hakkai smiled. "I'm going shopping. Let me help you buy the cigars."

"Hakkai?" Sanzo was about to refuse Hakkai's offer when Goku get a hold on his arm again. The boy pulled Sanzo's hand hard enough to he jerked forward. Goku snatched a kiss directly on Sanzo's lips. Red lines formed on Sanzo's cheek at Goku's daring action. "Fine. Get me the usual brand."

Goku hopped up and down happily as both of them made their way back into the inn for some 'monkey business'. Hakkai's mind was in a whirled but he was sure that was the right thing to do. He started to run the list of things to buy when he suddenly saw an old man with red coloured beard and sunglasses leaning against a tree. Hakkai sighed. [Here we go again.]

"Can I help you, sir?"

~*~*~ End of This Time ~*~*~

AN: It's finally done! So could you review this fic please? Pretty please? With sugar, honey and chocolate coatings on top?? =.=;; Yes, I'm weird. Please feel free to tell me what you think.