Hi, this is my first fic and I've had the idea to start it for some time. I thought I'd just post it to see how people react to it and see if they like the idea so far. Even if they don't I think I'll continue so people can get a grasp on how everything is connected within the story. Any and all comments are welcome. Any flames without just cause (as in your of just insulting me for the hell of it instead of actually trying to help me.) will be ignored. If the flames are helpful then I'll take them into consideration.

Disclaimer: I do not own Ranma 1/2, Oh My Goddess, Tenchi Muyo, King Of Fighters, God Diggers (or any other series that I may decide to add in the undetermined future), in any way possible. In this chapter or any of the following.

Helpful Loki, twist of fate

It is late at night in the Tendo dojo. Everyone is asleep except for our favourite pig-tailed hero. We zoom in to see him lying down with his hands behind his head in a melancholy mood tinged slightly with anger. Today was another hectic day in the life of our aquatransexual martial artist. Meaning that he was attacked by Ryouga blaming him for stubbing his toe, being glomped by the fiancés, and being continually smacked by Akane and that DAMN MALLET!!! We are just close enough to hear him whisper to himself.

"Why does everybody always blame me for everything when it's not my fault. Its not like I want all these problems in my life."

Even Worse, today his mother came by and he again had to pretend to be Ranko. All because of the stupid Panda. It was all his fault that he couldn't even be with his mother. All because of seppuku pledge to be a man among men.

"Stupid oyaji." he said with anger.

But the bane of his existence had become none other than Akane Tendo.

"Uncute Tomboy." He growled out, filled with hate

That's right. The person Ranma hated most was that mallet happy gorilla. He was more willing to marry _Kodachi_ than that lesbian one women feminist group. To think, people actually thought he loved her. Honestly, how could he love someone who didn't trust him and hit him for no reason but that she felt like it! He'd have been out of here a long time ago if it weren't for the ties of honour and the fact that he had nowhere to go.

Ranma sighed "I just wish I could live a happier life with my mom and where I could make her proud of me. I want control of my life and mistakes like the cat-fist." He began to shake in remembrance of the cat-fist but soon got it under control.

 "I want to be someplace where I can be loved and not blamed for everything. Where I no longer have to put up with Akane, Ukyo or Shampoo! Where my female side won't be glomped by perverts like Happosai and Kuno." Ranma shivered, in a disgusted way, in remembrance of their touch of his body.

For a moment there was silence as he paused, like he expected a deity to show up and answer his prayers. Then it was broken.

"Yeah right, like my wishes would be granted. With my luck things would just turn out worse."

Having said that Ranma turned on side and tried to get some sleep before the usual chaos started tomorrow.

~In Asgard~

"This can't be right."

Loki was not what you would call a sympathetic being. In fact, he was downright sadistic most of the time. He had caused a lot of the problems for Ranma while he was in Nerima as a source of entertainment for himself. He hadn't really looked at Ranma's file before he started toying with him. Now things were getting repetitive in Ranma's life so Loki thought he should spice things up a little. Remembering all the fun that arrived with Ranma's friends from the past, Loki decided to look through Ranma's file to find any other long lost friends to 'reacquaint' with the martial arts wonder.

"How could a mortal DO that to his _own_ son?"

Loki was horrified to say the least. Not even he would do some of the things this Genma had done. Loki suddenly, for the first time in centuries, felt overpowering guilt. He thought he was just having some relatively harmless fun with an egotistical hotshot. Not a lonely and tortured young boy who probably was a stranger to any form of love.

" What have I done?"

To put it simply, Loki felt like he'd just kicked a puppy. With steel toed boots. While it was limping towards him, moaning pitifully. After an uncaring owner that hadn't fed it in days had just tortured it. And … well you get the idea.

" That's it. Now I'm going to help him out. I owe him that at least."

Loki had heard Ranma's wish and decided to help grant it, in his own twisted understanding of it anyhow, to make amends. Just because Loki was sadistic and considered almost evil he still had a code of honour. Ranma was just about to get some divine help for once.

Loki only thought of the chaos that would ensue from his help as his gift for a good deed well done. It was only a bonus. HONEST! (Maybe he wasn't so nice after all. ^_^;)

~Tendo Dojo~

We find ourselves back in the guest room of the dojo where Ranma and his father are sleeping. Nothing exciting is happening until we see someone slip open the window and jump in. We look closer to see that its Happosai with a bag of supplies slung over his back.

Everyone thought of Happosai as mostly harmless. Sure he was annoying but he'd never really done anything to permanently harm them, just irritate the hell out of them. He was just a little pervert that only cared about himself and was quite vengeful sometimes. What they didn't know was that if he could he would turn almost all of them into slaves for him. He would have done it already if he had an item to do it and if there weren't so many powerful people that would be pissed off at him for doing it.

This is what brought him here tonight. He planned to lock Ranma in his cursed form and make, the now permanent, 'Ranko' his loving slave girl. He had found a spell that was supposed to allow the person, who used it, to attain their greatest desires. All he had to do was draw the pentagram around the target and chant the spell.

Happosai quickly went about setting up the spell. He first put a spell on the door, shutting it tighter than a bomb shelter, so no one could interrupt. Then he put some sleeping powder on Genma so that he wouldn't wake up even if his wife with that katana, damn is she scary with that sword, tried to visit. He didn't put any on Ranma in case it might affect the spell in some unseen way. He then carefully traced the pentagram around Ranma and began chanting the spell trying to hold back maniacal laughter so he doesn't mess up the spell or wake Ranma. Soon, he thinks, you will be my willing slave Ranma-chan. Unfortunately, or in Ranma's case fortunately, Happosai did not read through all of the instructions (thanks to Loki's intervention by the way) thus he did not know that the target that the pentagram was drawn around was the one that would have their greatest wishes granted instead of being the target of the wish like he thought. Oh well.

As Happosai finished the spell casting he began to laugh maniacally when the pentagram lit up. This is about the time that Ranma woke up, just in time to hear Happosai make a wish.

" HA HA HA HA HAA! Now I can have Ranma-chan all to myself." Happosai laughed out with a malicious grin on his face.

"W-what are y-you talking about you perverted freak?" Ranma asked nervously, realizing that he was about to have more magical mayhem added to his life.

Happosai ignored the question and began his wish. "I wish that Ranma would be locked in his cursed form and be my servant."

By this time Ranma was panicking because he realized what was going to happen. He tried to get up and attack Happosai but the magic held him down.

Then the scroll spoke out loud. "Number of wishes limited to 1 for caster. You have asked for two. Please state only ONE wish that coincides with the K.I.S.S ideals."

"WHAT, only one wish for me?" he asked furiously while Ranma smirked. As an after thought he asked dumbfounded, "K.I.S.S ideals?"

The scroll replied in a voice full of age and wisdom, "Keep It Simple Stupid!"

While Happosai began to recover from a nasty face fault due to an ancient artifact reciting the engineering ideal of K.I.S.S he began to contemplate which wish to choose.

Ranma, meanwhile, was trying to force his way out so he wouldn't be permanently cursed or a slave to the perverted troll, mumbling about how there was going to be a major @$$ kicking for anyone who bugged him tomorrow.


"WHAT??? Happosai gets a wish from this?" screamed Loki.

He began to think about what quite a few goddesses that are interested or protective of Ranma would do to him if something bad happened to Ranma.

"Its not like I meant this to happen. Besides, what's the worst they could do to me?"

As Loki thought about that he could come to only one conclusion.

"They're not going to hurt me, I know that. They're going to @*$%ing kill me!!!"

Suddenly a lightning bolt hit him from out of nowhere. After he stopped twitching, he read a message in the ground from Kami-sama. It read…

"No CURSING in heaven. And they wont kill you; they'll just maim you a bit. Most likely they'll torture you. You know something like…" As Loki continued to read all the forms of torture, from the Chinese drip torture to the drow torture he grew quite a few sweat drops and his eyes turned to the size of saucers.

As Loki began to sweat as his imagination began to picture torture after torture…

Happosai finally decided on his wish. "I wish that…"