GS NOTE: This is co-written by my good buddy tarnished oversoul and me. She insisted it be on my name. For some reason she thinks people read my stories. Anywho, this WAS POSTED UNDER ANOTHER NAME! No worries, that was our collective name, The Anime Avengers ^_^ No plagrism was done in the production of this fic.

tarnished oversoul's (old) Note: Hello my sweets. Ah yes, and thus begins a new fic by the Anime Avengers. Does the sweet essence not tingle in your nose? Can you not anticipate the twists and turns?

Okay, here's the buzz (and I don't mean just mean the buzz I'm getting off my cold meds.) I wanted to write a Gundam vampire fic, but I didn't know what to base the content on. So in my sickness I was sitting, and as a sat I watched, TV in fact. And I sat and I watched, and I watched and I sat. ALAS! An idea struck me! Why not do a parody on Shrek? In fact, a vampire parody called Shriek! (Come on, that princess almost looks like Duo.) And how original is this idea? I bet that no one out in Fan Fiction world has done this yet!

I think that GS is going to co-write this with me, so keep those fingers crossed. Also, I'm happy to announce that my daddy just purchased a brand new shining computer with Internet access! This means any comments, suggestions and/or rants will reach us (me in particular). Any comment you have on this we are more than willing to hear. Now, I don't mind a bit of constructive criticism, but if you happen to be one of those people who randomly picks stories and flames them, beware. GS may be polite, but I'm not. –Luv ya! -Tarnished Oversoul

Warnings: Anyone who does not like yaoi, scoot! This fic is not for you. Though I don't foresee any graphic details this is a PG-13 fic, (and of course, GS is going to change the rating later anyways.)I would like to mention that the couplings of this fic are 01+04 and 02+05.

THAT'S RIGHT FOLKS! 2x5 and 1x4 ^_^ Don't like, don't read please. It won't focus totally on these couples though. Please just read it for the writing and the humour, not the pairings.

Disclaimers: We don't own GW, the guys or Shrek. We only pine out little hearts for them. Oh, and any children or immature adults are free to leave please ^_^

Chapter 1

First, Our Heero

Once, in a place where no one was on time, there was a kingdom. In the kingdom lived a beautiful Prince named Quatre who ruled over the prosperous lands under the supervision of his father. Unfortunately, a curse of a dreadful sort was laid on the Prince Quatre. His people abandoned him to the care of a dragon in the hopes that a brave being could come along and save the prince from his blight. He could only be set free from his spell with true love's first -

"Hmph." The leather bound book was thrown into the wood stove to feed the dying fire. The young vampyre held the shard of painted glass to try and catch anything of his reflection. When he realized that the attempt was not going to give him more than a faint outline of dark hair and a fair face no matter what angle it was held at, he stopped and calmly threw the mirror too into the stove.

The vampyre had a habit of throwing away or destroying things and people that did not agree with him or his system of thinking. Everything in his life had an order and a place and a time, and there was no place for social interaction of any kind.

He ignored the pile of identical books and the full length mirror at the end of the house.

But as he had said, there was no place for social interaction. Except maybe dinner.

"Kill the vampyre!"

"Right on time." he noted with a steely voice. Even dinner came at the same time everyday. It was as if the villagers of Cinq just didn't realize that the mob they set out every third day at dusk didn't come back. Sooner or later the village would be completely devoid of men if they didn't wise up. Maybe they'd even send women. The vampyre had always thought that women had always had much sweeter blood than men anyway.

The Cinq vampyre stepped out of his crude hut with an indifferent look.

"Back! Back you villain!" shouted a braver villager with a torch. The vampyre didn't move, and the brawny man began to wave his garlic chain in front of him.

"Oh good, you brought your own seasonings."

*** (Some time later)

"He wasn't bad if I don't say so myself." the vampire said in a smoothly metallic voice. He licked his lips sensually, savouring the delicate flavour that they held. "Yes, there is a reason why the O blood type is so rare to find in humans."

Now that the vampyre had fed, there were no duties left for the night and the rising of the sun was still so far off. So he donned a dark coloured cloak and disappeared into the night.

A/N: Short, ne? Sorry, but the way my parts are working occasionally you're going to get these. I just wanted to get my next introduction and that just doesn't fit with this chapter.