The Misguided Journey
"Tamahome, I love you!!" cried Miaka.
"I love you too, Miaka!!" Tamahome yelled as they ran into each other's arms in a field a beautiful flowers. "Happy birthday, Miaka."
"Thank you, Tamahome!" said Miaka.
"You know I want nothing more than for you to be happy, Miaka, especially on your birthday." Said Tamahome.
"And the same thing goes for you, Tamahome!" Miaka exclaimed. "I will do ANYTHING for you!"
"Anything, Miaka?" Tamahome asked.
"Tamahome, I'll go to the ends of the earth for you!"
"Very well, Miaka. In that case, we must go on a journey."
"What for, Tamahome?"
"I can't say just yet, Miaka."
"Tamahome, you mustn't keep secrets from me!"
"You will learn in time, Miaka."
"Tamahome, tell me why."
"I'm looking for someone, Miaka."
"But Tamahome! Aren't I your love?"
"Yes, Miaka, but…"
"Who are you looking for, Tamahome?!"
"Miaka, I can't…"
"TELL ME, TAMAHOME!!" shrieked Miaka.
"Fine, Miaka, if you must know." Said Tamahome, nervously. "It's…um… er…I'm looking for…um…" Tamahome looked around to see Tasuki sitting in an armchair. "Tasuki. I'm looking for Tasuki, Miaka."
"But…Tamahome, unless my eyes deceive me, he's right there!" Miaka said, pointing at Tasuki.
"Don't be ridiculous, Miaka, we still must journey!" Tamahome declared.
"Tamahome, whyever are we looking for…?"
"BECAUSE!!!!" screamed Tamahome.
"Tamahome…" whispered Miaka. "You didn't say my name!"
"That's only the first step, Miaka." Said Tamahome. "If you do not come with me on this journey, Miaka…then I shall not love you anymore."
"But Tamahome! It's my birthday!!" whined Miaka.
"What better present than my happiness, Miaka?" asked Tamahome.
"Well, Tamahome, why didn't you put it that way in the first place?" said Miaka. "Tamahome…of course I'll go with you on your journey!"
"Very well…Miaka, we leave…now." Tamahome said as he turned around only to be faced with Hotohori who was wearing his teeny little hat with his massive amount of hair concealed in it.
"I shall come with you." Said Hotohori.
"Me too!!" said Nuriko as he popped out of the ground. "I must be with his majesty all the time!"
"And I will come too just because you're looking for me!" said Tasuki as he got up off his armchair that was in the middle of a field of flowers.
"Well if Tasuki is going then so am I!" said Chiriko who had been being used as Tasuki's footrest.
"I'm going just because I want to. No da." Said Chichiri.
"And I'm just going to go so I'm not the only one not going." Said Mitsukake. "I will probably be forgotten and ignored frequently but it's better than just staying home all by myself."
"I'm going too!!" said some random guard.
"Slave #75, you are not coming." Said Hotohori.
"But your majesty!!" said Slave #75. "I must protect you!"
"I'm fine, Slave #75." Said Hotohori.
"I must protect you!!" repeated Slave #75.
"Stay here, Slave #75." Said Hotohori, starting to sound annoyed.
"NO!!!!" screamed the slave. "I MUST PROTECT YOU!!!! I WOULD GIVE MY LIFE FOR YOU!!!"
"SO BE IT!!" yelled Hotohori as he impaled the slave with his sword.
And the slave was so close to dying but since Mitsukake couldn't stand the sight of death, he ran over and healed the slave in the nick of time.
"Well now I'm definitely coming." Said the slave.
"Whatever…" said everyone as they began the journey but suddenly heard a voice calling from behind them.
"HEY!! WAIT FOR ME!!!" yelled Amiboshi as he ran over the hill. Everyone groaned and tried not to look annoyed as he approached them with horseshoe eyes. "Guys! You weren't planning on leaving me behind again, were you?"
"Of course not, Suboshi, you're one of us!" said Tamahome.
"I'm AMIBOSHI!!" yelled Amiboshi.
"Oh right." Said Tamahome. "Same thing."
"No, I am my OWN person!" said Amiboshi. "So…where are we going?"
"On a journey, Chiriko-Chan!" said Miaka.
"What? I'm Amiboshi!" said Amiboshi.
"I'M Chiriko!" said Chiriko knavishly.
"Well…let's just go on our journey now." Said Tamahome since he really wanted to go on his journey to find Tasuki or so everyone thinks. So the Suzaku Seven, the Priestess of Suzaku, Amiboshi and Slave #75 walked off into the sunset.
"Shouldn't we be the Suzaku Eight now?" asked Amiboshi randomly.
"Why?" asked Hotohori.
"Because I'm one of you guys now!" said Amiboshi. "Tamahome said so!"
"Since when is Tamahome the emperor?" said Hotohori.
"He's NOT!" said Amiboshi all too cheerfully.
"Where are we going on this journey anyway? No da." Said Chichiri.
"We're trying to find Tasuki-Chan." Said Miaka.
"I'm right here." Said Tasuki.
Yui-Chan was taking a bath since she always does that. She was just bathing all by herself when all of a sudden, Suboshi walked in.
"Hey Yui!" said Suboshi. "I have you're shampoo! I made it."
"Suboshi!" said Yui. "I'm in the bath!"
"I know!" said Suboshi. "That's why I brought your shampoo! I didn't really make it though. I just took a bunch of stuff out of your backpack and mixed it together so I guess I really DID make it!!"
"Okay…you should leave now." Said Yui-Chan.
"Yui, I love you!" said Suboshi.
"I know…" said Yui-Chan, rolling her eyes. "But please leave."
Suboshi started whining like a puppy dog.
"FINE, you can stay." Said Yui-Chan.
"YAY!!" cheered Suboshi.
"I'm about to get out though." Said Yui-Chan.
"I'll get your towel!" said Suboshi just as Nakago walked in.
"WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU GUYS DOING?!?!" bellowed Nakago at the top of his lungs. "SHE MUST REMAIN A VIRGIN!!!!"
"Nakago!" whined Yui-Chan. "I'm taking a bath!!"
"Silence." Said Nakago. "I mean…oh…of course you are dearest priestess."
"Nakago…I love you." Said Soi as she walked in too.
"Oh, it's okay for you to be here because you're a girl!" said Yui-Chan.
"I think I'll join you!!" said Soi.
"Um…no." said Yui-Chan. "I'm getting out now."
"Here's your towel!" said Suboshi.
"Hel-lo." Said Tomo as he walked in too.
"Why is everyone coming in?!" demanded Yui-Chan. "I'm trying to take a bath in peace!"
"Hey guys." Said Miboshi as he floated in. "I accidentally killed Ashitare so he can't ever accompany us on anything ever again."
"OH WELL!!" chuckled everyone.
"HEY!!" yelled Yui-Chan. "Miboshi! I'm trying to take a bath!!"
"Where's Amiboshi?" asked Tomo just because he didn't say much when he first came in.
"Well, I think he's…" started Suboshi as Amiboshi walked in. "Right here."
"AMIBOSHI!! I'M TRYING TO TAKE A BATH!!!" screamed Yui-Chan.
"Aniki!!" said Suboshi happily as he hugged Amiboshi.
"I'm happy to see you too." Said Amiboshi as he stroked Suboshi's head like a mature big brother should. When they were finished saying hello to each other, Amiboshi turned to Nakago. "I have some news from the Suzaku!!"
"We don't need you to infiltrate them anymore." Said Nakago.
"But I like it." Said Amiboshi, getting depressed and lowering his head.
"Very well…what's the news?" asked Nakago just to humor Amiboshi.
"They're going on a journey." Amiboshi answered.
"And?" said Nakago.
"That's it." Amiboshi replied. "But don't worry! I will have more information before the day is out! See you later, guys!"
"Good bye, Aniki!" said Suboshi, waving to him as he left.
"Guys…I really wanna get out of the bath…I'm getting all pruney…" Yui-Chan complained.
"Well, I got your towel!" said Suboshi, still holding the towel.
"Fine, get out then." Said Miboshi as everyone just stood there foolishly and didn't leave so Yui-Chan could get out of the bathtub like she had previously hinted that she wanted them to do.
"Where are we going anyway, Tamahome?" asked Nuriko. It was a just question.
"Um…I suppose…somewhere near the Seiryu territory…I guess…" said Tamahome.
"Do you really think Tasuki will be there? No da." asked Chichiri.
"Yeah, why would I be THERE?!" asked Tasuki who was only getting more and more confused by the minute.
"He MIGHT be!" said Tamahome.
"Hold on, so you're going to Seiryu?" Amiboshi said as he started writing this down on his arm. "And where are you going after that?"
"I don't know!" said Tamahome. "I guess I'll know when I get there!"
"Do you know WHAT you're looking for?" asked Mitsukake.
"Um…Tasuki?" suggested Tamahome.
"You know, I might just be naïve but I have reason to believe that you're looking for something besides Tasuki." Said Chiriko.
"You're just naïve." Tamahome assured Chiriko.
"Oh." Said Chiriko. "Okay."
"YOU'RE MAJESTY!!!" screamed Slave #75 as he leapt in front of Hotohori as some arrows came out of nowhere and impaled the slave. It was clear that the true target was Hotohori!!! "NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!"
"Oh." Said Hotohori. "I was almost killed. Thank you, Slave #75."
A few assassins snapped their fingers and stomped off, disappointed that they had failed.
"I WILL SAVE YOU!!" yelled Mitsukake as he dove forward and healed the slave before he died.
"Thank you!" said the slave, standing up.
"You know, this random slave saw this and we didn't and we're all mighty Celestial Warriors." Said Tasuki.
"Well…I saw it too." Said Amiboshi. "But to be truthful…it would have been in my best interest as a Seiryu if he had died."
Everyone stared at Amiboshi.
"I mean, as far as you guys know, I was the one who called them here!" said Amiboshi as he started laughing as if it was a joke.
"You know, Amiboshi, I think it would be better if you didn't come with us." Said Hotohori as he stepped away from Amiboshi.
"It was a joke!" Amiboshi said, looking offended. "I didn't REALLY!!"
"But still…you're suspiciously writing things down and you have no reason to be here." Said Hotohori.
"But…but…" started Amiboshi.
"Do you want me to take care of him, your majesty?" asked Slave #75.
"No, you leave too." Said Hotohori.
"But Tamahome said that I was one of you guys!" said Amiboshi as his eyes started watering.
"I swear I said that to Suboshi." Said Tamahome.
"Well, not to make my dear darling younger twin brother look bad or anything but he was the one who killed your family!" Amiboshi pointed out. "I mean, I love him dearly with all my heart but he's kind of a jerk if you don't get on his good side right from the beginning!" Then he gave the thumbs up.
"Amiboshi…please leave." Said Hotohori.
"Well…I know when I'm not wanted!" said Amiboshi as he buried his face in his hands and ran off.
"No!" said Miaka. "Chiriko-Chan! No one who makes such beautiful music with their flute could be that evil!"
"It's not that he's evil…he just doesn't belong." Said Nuriko.
"And let's not remind him of his flute or else he won't be so easy to push around. No da." Said Chichiri.
"What, you think Chiriko-Chan will come back?" asked Miaka hopefully.
"Yes. No da." Said Chichiri.
"I'M Chiriko!" said Chiriko.
"I got a message from my brother!" yelled Suboshi as he ran into the room where everyone was sitting drinking tea. "It says: "The Suzaku are coming to… to…"
"Seiryu." Amiboshi read, looking over Suboshi's shoulder.
"Thanks." Said Suboshi. "I can't read your handwriting sometimes."
"I was getting a little excited, so much was going on." Said Amiboshi.
"Wait…" said Nakago. "When did you get here?"
"Didn't you see me come in?" asked Amiboshi, looking puzzled.
"What's the point of writing notes to him if you're just going to come and tell us the information?" asked Soi.
"I have to look out for my younger twin brother." Said Amiboshi.
"Yeah but…" started Tomo.
"HOW DARE YOU SAY BAD THINGS ABOUT MY ANIKI!!!" yelled Suboshi as he pulled his weapon thingy and killed Tomo in a horribly gruesome way until nothing was left except…his hair. If only they had someone like Mitsukake who could heal him. Actually, I think if someone was chopped up so much that the only thing that remained of him was his hair, he'd be beyond help. Even by Mitsukake.
"Oh darn." Said Nakago.
"Suboshi, Seiryu warriors are not disposable at your whim!" said Yui-Chan.
"Bad!" said Amiboshi, slapping Suboshi's hand.
"I'm sorry!" cried Suboshi.
"Sorry isn't going to bring Tomo back, is it?" said Amiboshi in that 'older twin brother' tone.
"But I thought…" started Suboshi.
"No, there's nothing you can do about it now." Said Amiboshi. "This isn't a movie, Suboshi. It's real life. Tomo can never come back now."
"Maybe you should take some time off to think." Said Yui-Chan.
"Are you sending me to my room?" asked Suboshi.
"If you had a room, I would send you to it." Yui-Chan replied. "Instead, just go and walk around for a little while. Why don't you fill this jug up with water?"
"Yes, time for a Suboshi quiet time!" said Amiboshi.
"Okay…" said Suboshi, taking the jug and walking off with his head hung low.
"He's such a pain sometimes!" sighed Amiboshi, sitting down at the little table and taking Tomo's cup of tea. "But that's okay because he's my younger twin brother."
Suboshi was strutting along with his empty jug singing the 'Filling Up My Jug for Yui and Aniki' song since Amiboshi and Yui-Chan frequently send him to fill up a jug.
So he hummed his Jug Song as he filled up the jug and then pulled it out of the river. "Hey…" he said. "This jug…it's a little heavy. I don't think I can carry it all by myself… I need a helper… to carry it back to camp… and then kill… after he's been utilized… I hear someone!"
Then he peeked around a tree to see AWK!! THE SUZAKU SEVEN COMING!!
He gasped and stood there in awe for a minute and then he realized what a perfect opportunity this was to redeem himself for killing Tomo and also to impress Yui-Chan.
"Is that YOU Chiriko-Chan?!" Miaka shrieked suddenly.
"I'm right here!" said Chiriko.
"No, THAT Chiriko-Chan!" Miaka, said pointing at Suboshi.
"Amiboshi, we said that you can't come with us on our journey." Said Tamahome.
"I'll come on the journey if I want." Said Suboshi. "Since I am Amiboshi."
"Chiriko-Chan!" sighed Miaka.
"IT'S A TRICK!!!" yelled Slave #75.
"Don't be silly, Slave…" started Hotohori.
"HOW DID YOU FIGURE OUT MY SECRET?!?!" yelled Suboshi. "NOW AS LONG AS EVERYBODY KNOWS, DIE SUZAKU SEVEN!!!" And he whipped out his weapon and attacked Hotohori but the Slave jumped in front again. The weapon went through the slave like butter but by that time, Hotohori had moved to the side and Chiriko (the real one) just so happened to be standing behind Hotohori and the weapon impaled HIM!! OH NO!!!
"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" yelled Mitsukake as he healed the Slave since he was closer to him. But by this time, he had healed the slave three times in one day and he was getting a little weak so he passed out and left Chiriko to die.
"Cough cough…" coughed Chiriko as his theme song started playing in the background. "Dying…"
"CHIRIKO!!" yelled Tasuki as he ran over to Chiriko's potential corpse. "No, you can't die yet!"
"Goodbye…Tasuki." Said Chiriko. "I'm sorry I couldn't continue the journey with you to find you! Here, I made this necklace for you!" And he pulled out a little beaded necklace with a plastic heart in the middle and handed it to Tasuki.
"You will live on in my heart!" said Tasuki as he put the necklace on.
"Fare…well…" said Chiriko as he died completely and his body faded away.
"No…" said Tasuki as he made a fist. "You won't get away with this!" He turned around to see that Suboshi was long gone. "Too…grief-stricken…can't run…after little man with jug…"
"Man, that was a shame. No da." Said Chichiri.
"Yeah…I'll miss him." Agreed Tamahome.
"What?" said Mitsukake as he regained consciousness but it was far too late to save Chiriko at this point because as we previously stated, he's already died completely and his body is gone anyway.
"But thanks for saving me!" said Slave #75.
Just then, Amiboshi came out nowhere.
"HEY GUYS!!" he said. "You didn't get very far!"
"GASP!!!" yelled everyone.
"You can come on our journey!" said Nuriko nervously, worried that maybe Amiboshi would kill them because little did they know, it was SUBOSHI who had killed Chiriko, not Amiboshi! ARGH!!!
"YAY!!" cheered Amiboshi.
"WHAT?!" yelled Tasuki. "NEVER!! I REFUSE TO ACCEPT HIM AS ONE OF US!!"
"But WE already have." Said Tamahome.
"Chiriko-Chan!" said Miaka happily.
"You will pay!!" yelled Tasuki.
"For what?" asked Amiboshi.
"Don't act as though you don't know!!" commanded Tasuki as he went to Rekka Shinen Amiboshi but Amiboshi pulled out his flute and played a magical tune that gave Tasuki amnesia.
"Okay, let's continue the journey." Said Tamahome.
"I'm back!" said Suboshi as he walked in with his jug. "And I killed one of the Suzaku Seven while I was out!"
"Very good, Suboshi." Said Nakago as he played Twister with Soi, Yui-Chan and Miboshi.
"I also filled the jug up with water." Said Suboshi. "Can I play?"
Just then, Amiboshi strolled in.
"Not much happened this time." He reported.
"ANIKI!!" Suboshi yelled, jumping up and hugging his aniki.
"You're so easily excitable, younger twin brother." Said Amiboshi.
"I know!" said Suboshi. "I filled the jug up."
"Good!" said Amiboshi, slapping him five. "Now we can have beverages!"
"Hey, how about we terrorize the Suzaku Seven or something?" suggested Miboshi.
"Why?" asked Amiboshi. "I'm collecting so much information."
"But I'm BORED…" complained Miboshi.
"At least let me lead them into a dark and scary forest or something and we can attack them there?" said Amiboshi.
"Okay." Said Nakago. "Just do your little writing on the arm thing to Suboshi and we'll come and attack them or something."
"You got it!" said Amiboshi as he ran away as fast as he could.
"Hey guys, let's go into a dark forest!" said Amiboshi excitedly.
"Okay, Amiboshi, the first dark forest you see, just give a shout." Said Tamahome who was still set on getting to Seiryu.
"THERE'S ONE!!!" yelled Amiboshi, pointing to a big dark forest.
"But…" started Tamahome.
"It's a shortcut to Seiryu!" Amiboshi said. "Trust me. I live there."
"I trust, you Chiriko-Chan!" said Miaka. "Let's go in the short cut through the dark forest, everyone!"
"As long as Miaka is." Said Hotohori. And they all went into the forest.
"But isn't this kind of weird and suspicious?" asked Nuriko.
"I don't have a good feeling about this forest. No da." Said Chichiri, looking around at all the spooky looking trees.
"Don't be silly, Chichiri-Chan!" said Miaka. "It's not like the trees are going to come to life and kill you or anything."
BUT, as soon as she said that, a tree came to life and killed the slave.
"NO!!!" yelled Mitsukake as he healed the slave and then passed out again.
"Thank you so much…" said the slave.
"Okay, I think we should leave this dark forest." Said Nuriko. Suddenly, the tree came to life again and squeezed the life out of Chichiri and crushed all his organs. All of them.
"CHICHIRI-CHAN!!!" shrieked Miaka as she caressed Chichiri's body and his theme song started playing in the background.
"No…da." Said Chichiri as he died and then faded out like Chiriko did earlier.
"Guys, I really didn't know that the trees in this forest were going to try and kill you all!" said Amiboshi.
"I think…Amiboshi, I think you should tell your brother about this disaster." Said Tamahome.
"Why would I…um…okay!" said Amiboshi as he started writing on his arm and reading out loud. "Dear Suboshi, a disaster has happened. A tree has killed Chichiri. Love, your Aniki."
"Dear Suboshi, we're in the dark forest now. Come kill them. Love, your Aniki." Suboshi read out loud. "YAY!! DEATH!!!"
"LET'S GO!!!" said Miboshi since he doesn't say much.
"Is everybody ready?" asked Nakago. "Where's Soi?"
"I accidentally killed her too…" confessed Miboshi. "I'm really sorry. I was trying to possess her body so I could be beautiful but she couldn't handle it so she exploded."
"Oh." Said Nakago. "I missed that entirely."
"Sorry." Said Miboshi, hanging his head in shame. "It will never happen again."
"Good." Said Nakago.
Then the remaining Seiryu Seven, which is now the Seiryu Four and Yui-Chan, paraded out the door. But actually, Amiboshi is not present and accounted for so it's only three of the Seiryu Four and Yui-Chan.
"HEY GUYS!!!" said Amiboshi as he dropped from the sky and slapped Suboshi on the back.
"ANIKI!!!" said Suboshi happily.
"They're in the dark forest just as you ordered." Said Amiboshi.
"No…you decided that and then left when you wanted to." Said Nakago.
"YAY!!" cheered Amiboshi and Suboshi at the same time as they hugged each other.
"Are you listening to me?" asked Nakago as he watched the two nuzzle each other.
"YES SIR!" they said, saluting him.
"But we mustn't kill Miaka." Said Yui-Chan randomly.
"Um…okay." Said one of the Seiryu Four.
"Hey, I don't know who I am." Said Tasuki. "I got amnesia a little while back."
"That's okay." Said Amiboshi.
"Let's leave this forest." Said Hotohori.
"Wait, where's Miaka?" asked Nuriko.
"We must…get to Seiryu…" said Tamahome passionately.
"Don't you care about Miaka?!" demanded Hotohori.
"Not anymore!" declared Tamahome. "YOU can have her!"
"OKAY!!" said Hotohori just as Miaka came around the corner with a huge evil looking mirror.
"Miaka, where did you get that suspicious looking mirror?" asked Mitsukake.
"I found it!" she answered. "Isn't it gweat?"
"Miaka, it looks sinister." Said Hotohori.
"No, it's my FRIEND!" said Miaka. Suddenly, the mirror seemed to take on a life of its own and sucked her into it. "HELP ME!!!" Miaka shrieked as she pounded on the glass from the inside of the mirror.
"MIAKA!!!" shouted Hotohori as he picked the mirror. "You'll be okay!"
"What should we do?" asked Nuriko.
"I still don't know who I am." Said Tasuki. "What just happened?"
"Must…find…Seiryu…" said Tamahome. Mitsukake restrained him to keep him from leaving while they were rescuing Miaka.
"Maybe if we SMASH it, she'll be free!" said Amiboshi.
"Good idea!" said Hotohori as he was just about to smash the mirror with all his might when he turned around and gave it to the slave. "I refuse to do manual labor. While you're here, you might as well make yourself useful and smash this mirror for me."
"Yes sir!" said the slave as he smashed the mirror. They all watched as Miaka's soul floated out of the mirror and went up to heaven as Miaka's theme song played in the background.
"MIAKA!!!" yelled Hotohori. "NOOOOOOOOOOOO!!" Then he looked at the slave. "This is all YOUR fault!!" Then he smote the slave.
"NO!!" yelled Mitsukake as he healed the slave again. Since he let go of Tamahome, he started pressing forward again.
"Come back!!" yelled no one really as they all went and caught up with him.
"I swear I did not know that that was going to happen!" said Amiboshi. "I am so sorry and grief-stricken."
"You don't sound very grief-stricken." Said Nuriko.
"I am the most grief-stricken one here." Said Amiboshi.
"YOU LIE!!" yelled Hotohori.
"I'M SORRY!!!" whined Amiboshi.
"Don't worry." Said Hotohori. "I don't blame you. I blame the slave. Speaking of which…" He turned around and smote the slave again but Mitsukake saved him AGAIN.
"Are we almost there?" Yui-Chan asked from her papoose on Suboshi's back.
"Are you comfortable?" asked Suboshi.
"Um…surprisingly enough, I am." Yui-Chan confessed.
"I'm glad!" said Suboshi. "You're not heavy at all!"
"But anyway." Said Yui-Chan, looking at Nakago. "Are we almost at this evil dark forest?"
"Yes." Said Nakago.
"Okay." Said Yui-Chan as they all walked in silence until Amiboshi came out of nowhere.
"HORRIBLE NEWS!!!" he yelled.
"What is it?" asked Miboshi since he hasn't said anything yet.
"Actually, this news is only horrible for Yui." Said Amiboshi. "It seems that Miaka has met an untimely end. Not by my hands, of course."
"What?" said Yui-Chan. "Miaka! No!" And then she started weeping.
"Yui, I'm going to take you out of that papoose while you weep because I just can't take you seriously like that." Suboshi said as he put the papoose down and helped Yui-Chan out.
"I CAN'T BELIEVE MIAKA IS GONE!!" wailed Yui-Chan.
"It's okay, Yui." Said Nakago. "Who is the one who killed Miaka?"
"Er…" said Amiboshi nervously as he started writing a message to Suboshi that said, 'What should I say? Some random slave killed Miaka.'
Suboshi answered with, 'Tell them that Tamahome killed her.'
Amiboshi replied with, 'But I idolize Tamahome!'
Suboshi said, 'Then tell them something else.'
"Tasuki killed Miaka." Amiboshi said.
Nakago raised an eyebrow. "That was probably one of the most suspicious things I have ever seen but I will disregard it since I don't really care who did it, I was asking only for Yui's sake but she couldn't hear you because of her wailing anyway." He said.
"Amiboshi…" said Tamahome, pulling Amiboshi aside as the rest of the group continued walking.
"Yes Tamahome?" said Amiboshi.
"Do you think you could do me a favor?" asked Tamahome.
"Of course!" Amiboshi answered. "You're my hero!"
"Okay." Said Tamahome. "Could you tell me a little about your brother?"
"My brother?" Amiboshi said, confused. "Oh! You mean Suboshi!"
"Do you have any OTHER brother?" Tamahome said, looking annoyed.
"I guess not!" chuckled Amiboshi. "What do you want to know about him?"
"What's he like?"
"Well…hm…" said Amiboshi, thinking. "I suppose…he's just like me. Only younger!"
"I thought he was your twin brother." Said Tamahome.
"He is!" Amiboshi answered. "But I'm older."
"Well…I was thinking more along the lines personality wise." Tamahome said.
"Oh! In that case then I'd have to say that he's just like me only mean."
"Oh…" said Tamahome with a sigh. "I see…"
"Any reason?" asked Amiboshi as he rolled up his sleeve, getting ready to write a message to Suboshi.
"Well…you have to promise not to tell anyone." Tamahome said, lowering his voice. "I trust you because you look so much like Suboshi."
"Why do you trust Suboshi?" asked Amiboshi.
"Because…I love him." Tamahome answered.
Amiboshi paused, standing there in a stupefied state.
"Keep this a secret for now." Tamahome instructed as he walked away to join the others.
"Dear Suboshi," Amiboshi wrote.
"If you see Tamahome, RUN!! Love, your Aniki." Suboshi read. "Ha! I'm not afraid of Tamahome! I can beat him up any day! Dear Aniki, don't worry about me! I'm gonna go and kill Tamahome even though he's your idol. Love, your younger twin brother, Suboshi."
"NO!!" yelled Amiboshi. "DON'T! You mustn't!!"
"Why?!" demanded Suboshi.
"Because I idolize him." Amiboshi answered. "Besides, he doesn't want to fight you, he…
actually loves you!!"
Amiboshi looked around and snapped his fingers. Then he rolled up his sleeve to finish his letter to Suboshi.
"Dear Suboshi, as I was saying…" he wrote but then he noticed that Suboshi was writing something to him. "Dear Aniki, I don't need you telling me what I can and cannot do. Love, your younger twin brother, Suboshi."
"No respect at all!! I resent that entirely!" he yelled. "Well, I'll show him just who's the Aniki around here!! Dear Suboshi, I…"
"Um…Amiboshi?" said Nuriko who was standing right there. In fact, they ALL were!! Except for the people who were dead.
"Ha ha!" said Amiboshi. "I mean…"
Tamahome shot Amiboshi a death glare.
"I protest to the rest of this journey!" he said. "It's perilous and many people have met untimely ends for no reason at all!"
"NO REASON?!?!" yelled Tamahome. "THERE IS A REASON!!!"
"Let's hear it." Said Hotohori.
"Where am I?" wondered Tasuki as he tumbled off a gigantic gorge and one of his many theme songs played in the background.
"TASUKI!!!" yelled Mitsukake but he didn't want to die himself so he didn't jump off as well.
"There you go." Said Hotohori. "Another unnecessary causality for what reason?"
"We must get to Seiryu!" Tamahome yelled.
"I FORBID IT!!!" yelled Amiboshi. "I will do anything to stop you!!"
"HA!!!" laughed Tamahome. "Just what are you going to do?!"
"Anything I have to do!" Amiboshi yelled. "Even…MARRY you!!"
"It won't be the same…" said Tamahome, striking a pose of despair.
"It practically is!" Amiboshi said. "Just leave my brother alone! He's so young and so innocent and he has his whole life ahead of him! I'm much older than he is! I've been in this world much longer! And I don't think such a young mind should have to…
go through with something as horrible as this!!!!"
"What?" said Nakago.
Amiboshi turned around. "Since when am I here?!"
"Look!! It's the Suzaku!!" yelled Suboshi. "Let's get 'em!"
"NO!!!" screamed Amiboshi, jumping on top of Suboshi.
"Aw, I'm happy to see you too, Aniki!" said Suboshi.
"It's not that!" said Amiboshi. "Though, yes, I am happy to see you but you don't know what the Suzaku plan to do!"
"HEY GUYS!!!" yelled Miboshi. "I think we're triplets."
"What would give you a stupid idea like that?" asked Suboshi.
"Because our names all end with 'boshi'." Miboshi replied.
"SHUT UP!!!" yelled Suboshi.
"Yup, I'm the long lost triplet!" Miboshi said. "I'm the one that isn't identical like you two!"
"HOW DARE YOU!!" yelled Suboshi, pulling out his deadly weapon of doom that has killed more things than everyone else's weapons put together. "THERE IS ONLY ONE ANIKI!!!" And with that, Miboshi was thusly destroyed.
"Oh…Suboshi!" said Amiboshi. "You did that…for me!"
"Yes, Aniki!" said Suboshi. "YOU are that only Aniki!"
"But you still shouldn't kill members of the Seiryu…" said Yui-Chan, sounding disappointed.
"Oh Yui!" said Suboshi. "Oh Aniki!"
"OH SUBOSHI!!!" came a voice off in the distance. Everyone turned around to see Tamahome frolicking up in slow motion with all the other Suzaku and the slave following behind him.
"TAMAHOME!!!" Yui-Chan shrieked.
"HOTOHORI!!" Nuriko said randomly.
"Miaka…" cried Hotohori.
"Your majesty!" said the slave.
"CAT!!!" said Mitsukake to his lovely cat.
"SUBOSHI!!!" yelled Amiboshi, trying to push Suboshi away.
"YUI!!" cheered Suboshi.
"Um…Nakago." Said Nakago.
"Oh no!" said Tamahome. "Which one of you is Suboshi?"
"It's me." Said Suboshi.
"NO!!" yelled Amiboshi. "I am the one you seek! I am Suboshi!"
"Don't be silly, Aniki, you're my aniki and I'm Suboshi." Said Suboshi.
"No, I'm Suboshi and you're MY aniki." Said Amiboshi.
"Who is the REAL Suboshi?" demanded Tamahome. "This is important."
"I AM the real Suboshi!" said Amiboshi. "I'll prove it! I'll kill someone!" Then he pulled out his flute, thought twice and put it back in his pocket. Then he snatched the weapon of doom from Suboshi and tried his best to throw it but it just kind of fell to the ground. Then he grabbed Nakago's sword and stabbed Nuriko.
"No!" said Nuriko as his theme song played in the background. "I…leave this world now…as a man…" And he died before Mitsukake had the chance to heal him.
"See?" said Amiboshi. "I'm Suboshi."
"No, Aniki, that's not how you kill people!" laughed Suboshi as he picked up his deadly weapon of doom and then used its might to kill Mitsukake. "See? Not only did I kill him but now they can't heal anyone."
"Thank you, Suboshi." Said Amiboshi. "But you know how against killing I am."
"Of course, Aniki." Said Suboshi.
Then they paused.
"WAIT!!" said Amiboshi. "I'M Suboshi!"
"SUBOSHI!!!" Tamahome screamed as he spread his arms out and latched onto Suboshi like a leech.
"EEK!!!" yelled Amiboshi as he tried to pry Tamahome off Suboshi.
"THERE'S A MAN LATCHED ONTO ME!!!" yelled Suboshi. "SAVE ME YUI!! SAVE ME ANIKI!!"
"This is disturbing." Said Yui-Chan. "I don't like Tamahome anymore."
"I think this is a good time for me to die." Said Nakago as he slit his wrists and then hung himself.
"Okay…" said Yui-Chan.
"Yui…I have…your bow!" said Suboshi.
"Okay." Said Yui-Chan.
"Take it!" Suboshi instructed.
"…Okay." Said Yui-Chan.
Then he tossed the bow to Yui-Chan and it went in slow motion towards her and she caught it. Her eyes immediately welded up with tears as she caressed it and then put it back on her uniform. "I will remember you, Suboshi…"
"I'm still alive!!" Suboshi whined. "But Tamahome's trying to kill me!!"
"No, I LOVE you!" said Tamahome. "When I get older, I'm going to get a house and would you please do me the honor of living in that house with me?!"
"AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!" yelled Suboshi.
"Younger brother!!" gasped Amiboshi. "Don't give in!!"
"This is too weird now." Said Hotohori. "I think I'm going to leave now."
"Not so fast!!" said the slave, ripping off a mask. "I'm actually an assassin from Seiryu!! BWA HA HA HA HA HA!!" And then he killed Hotohori and then commit Seppuku right then and there. Hotohori AND the slave's theme played at the same time so it sounded really stupid.
"Why don't you love me, Suboshi?" asked Tamahome.
"Many reasons!!" Suboshi answered. "But mostly because I love Yui!"
"YUI?!" yelled Tamahome, letting go of Suboshi. "Then I will eliminate Yui from the picture! DIE, WENCH!!!"
Then he punched through Yui-Chan so his fist came out the other end and then they stood there for a little while until Yui-Chan's theme song started playing in the background and then she died and faded away.
"YOU KILLED YUI!!!" yelled Suboshi. "NOW DIE!!!!" And then Suboshi had a Hulk Moment and was able to smite Tamahome WITHOUT his weapon!! As Tamahome's theme played in the background and Tamahome perished slowly, Amiboshi approached the grief-stricken Suboshi.
"Are you all right, Suboshi?" he asked. "You look very grief-stricken."
"I am." Said Suboshi. "The love of my life is dead."
"Your Aniki is still alive." Said Amiboshi, giving Suboshi a big hug.
"YEAH!!" said Suboshi. "But…what are we going to do with the rest of our lives anyway?"
"Well…when I wasn't telling you guys the plans of the Suzaku or finding out the plans of Suzaku, I've been living under a secret alias as Kaika in a pleasant little village." Amiboshi said. "You could come with me and be Kaika #2."
"Okay, Aniki." Said Suboshi.
And then Kaika and Kaika #2 walked off into the sunset as their theme songs played in the background.