"You're almost there. Here, let me give you a hand."

He knelt and extended a hand to her climbing form. They'd made it to the top of the makeshift structure in The Strawberry that those that had dared to brave it boasted a breathtaking view of Lawndale. His hand closed around hers and she felt the secure warmth of the strength from him as he pulled her up and to him. They were in such close proximity that each could feel the others breath…both were relieved that neither had opted for onions on the pizza that they'd shared earlier. The night air was cooler up there than it had been from where they'd started so far down below.

Climb up the H of the Hollywood sign, yeah
In these stolen moments
The world is mine
There's nobody here, just us together
Keepin' me hot like July forever

'Cause we're the masters of our own fate
We're the captains of our own souls
There's no way for us to come away
'Cause boy we're gold, boy we're gold

She didn't glance down. The danger wasn't from falling to the ground, no that wasn't the kind of danger either had tonight.

"Look, there" his voice was a velvety whisper. He gently turned her by the shoulders to the direction that he was pointing.

"It's…beautiful," she admitted softly.

And it was beautiful, the lights glittering below making little Lawndale appear to be large and busy. The scene was great, but that wasn't what was making her heart slightly race or her breath catch slightly.

"I come here sometimes when I need to clear my head from you know…life or whatever."

She nodded. His hands had slid from her shoulders down to lightly sit at her waist. They stayed that way for a while, neither felt a need for idle chatter; both enjoyed the comfort of the other. A slight breeze and he moved even closer his arms now encircling her waist.

"Am I too close for you?"

Never…..

She shook her head.

"No, you're good…"

She had turned so that she was at three quarter posed to look back and up at him while he looked down at her.

Turn back around and stop captivating me with those eyes…

And I was like

Take off, take off
Take off all your clothes
Take off, take off
Take off all your clothes
Take off, take off
Take off all of your clothes
They say only the good die young
That just ain't right
'Cause we're having too much fun
Too much fun tonight, yeah

And a lust for life, and a lust for life
And a lust for life, and a lust for life
Keeps us alive, keeps us alive
Keeps us alive, keeps us alive
And a lust for life, and a lust for life

And a lust for life, and a lust for life
And a lust for life, and a lust for life
Keeps us alive, keeps us alive
Keeps us alive, keeps us alive
And a lust for life, and a lust for life
And a lust for life, and a lust for life
Keeps us alive, keeps us alive
Keeps us alive, keeps us alive

Tom will be back soon and with that our time will end. You have no idea how much this time with you has meant… It started out so simple, you coming by to see Jane and Jane deciding to head out of town to an Art convention near where Summer lived. I remember that first night when I suggested that you come with me to the Zon…you looked nervous, but you said yes. It was so different seeing you, talking to you without Jane being expected to come in. It was nice. I've always enjoyed talking with you… I won't dwell on the wrongness of this situation… Three and a half years never felt like such a difference to me, until you… No, I won't think on that or how our nights together grow fewer. Instead I will enjoy this thing that we have you and I. This feels so nice up here with you in our own world swaying slightly to our own song; you don't miss a beat…

Then, we dance on the H of the Hollywood sign, yeah
'Til we run out of breath, gotta dance 'til we die
My boyfriend's back
And he's cooler than ever
There's no more night, blue skies forever

'Cause we're the masters of our own fate
We're the captains of our own souls
So there's no need for us to hesitate
We're all alone, let's take control
And I was like

Take off, take off
Take off all your clothes
Take off, take off
Take off all your clothes
Take off, take off
Take off all of your clothes
They say only the good die young
That just ain't right
'Cause we're having too much fun
Too much fun tonight, yeah

And a lust for life, and a lust for life
And a lust for life, and a lust for life
Keeps us alive, keeps us alive
Keeps us alive, keeps us alive
And a lust for life, and a lust for life
And a lust for life, and a lust for life
Keeps us alive, keeps us alive
Keeps us alive, keeps us alive

Your breath tickles my cheek. You intoxicate me with all that you do. You make it so easy to just be around you. I now know when I made my first mistake- if that is what it is to be called- it was when I came to the conclusion that because I had said yes to being another's girlfriend that would somehow shield me from feeling anything more for you. Maybe it was my subconscious at work…nevertheless… I haven't done anything wrong- not technically. I am simply out with a friend having fun. No one can begrudge me a few stolen moments of happiness. The feel of your arms around me it's…so right. It makes me long for more…so very much more. On that point I do feel a modem of guilt for what that could mean to my relationship with Tom…I won't think about that. I will enjoy this time… I will do something that I have never done, I will live in the moments and enjoy what comes.

She turned slightly again and smiled up into kind eyes looking down at her with a mixture of emotions. They'd come to an understanding of sorts, though neither spoke of it. They knew that the exclusiveness of this situation would be over the moment Tom and Jane returned. Things would have to return to normal…though neither could exactly remember what that was at the moment.

My boyfriend's back
And he's cooler than ever
There's no more night, blue skies forever
I told you twice in our love letter
There's no stopping now, green lights forever
And I was like

Take off, take off
Take off all your clothes
Take off, take off
Take off all your clothes
Take off, take off
Take off all of your clothes

And a lust for life, and a lust for life
And a lust for life, and a lust for life
Keeps us alive, keeps us alive
Keeps us alive, keeps us alive
And a lust for life, and a lust for life
And a lust for life, and a lust for life
Keeps us alive, keeps us alive
Keeps us alive, keeps us alive

"I missed you," Tom said enveloping her small frame into a warm hug. He'd come straight over the moment that his family had returned to Lawndale- he hadn't even bothered to unpack yet.

She smiled up at him. He looked good…

"Did you have fun?"

"Not as much fun as with you, but it wasn't bad" he leaned in so that they were nose to nose. She pulled back slightly, though not quite out of his arms.

"I'm glad you had fun."

He took her hand in his loosely and they went to sit on the couch.

"So what did you do while I was gone? Let me guess, you wrote heat wrenching poetry speaking of how you longed for my return. You filled each page front to back because no words were adequate enough to convey-"

She kissed him and effectively shut up his ridiculous rant.

"Maybe I should go away more often," he teased.

She shook her head that lay against his shoulder feeling slightly overcome with emotion.

"Hey, what's wrong?" he whispered into her hair.

She shook her head and squeezed her eyes shut.

"It's okay." He held her.

Wow, this is unexpected. She must not have expected to miss me as much as she did.

"What is this, The Young and The Restless?" Jane's voice broke through. The couple pulled apart and turned to where Jane and the tall form of her -brother had entered from the kitchen. "Sorry to interrupt," she smirked at them, "I guess I should have called first…"

"Don't' be silly," Tom said enthusiastically, "we were gonna watch a movie, eat some pizza- you know the usual while catching up. You guys are welcome to join us."

"Nah, we'll just overload on what each of us did. We'll catch up brother that hadn't said anything and saw that he was looking at her best friend and that her best friend was looking at him. The brother/sister duo turned and left.

She sure looked like she missed him…

A week later…

She entered the Lane household.

"Jane is out back," he offered without looking up.

She fidgeted with the hem of her jacket waiting for him to look up from the coffee cup that he seemed to be studying in grave detail. He didn't look at her.

"About last week- when you guys came by-"

"I've got to get to practice," he stood suddenly knocking the chair to the floor. She took hold of his arm to stop him from hurrying off. She tried to tug him so that he would look at her, but still he would not.

"I'm trying to explain-"

"Explain what? You were hugging your boyfriend that you missed. Enough said."

"That's not what I-" she moved that she was standing before him and glared up at his still averted face. "That's not how it was."

"It's really none of my business."

"Of course it is- I mean part of it is. You and I, we…" she fished around for words, but none came to mind.

"Yeah, well like I said Jane's out back and I should get to practice."

"Why won't you look at me?"

Because my resolve to do the right thing might shatter.

"Do you regret our time together?" she asked in a low voice and then in a quieter tone she said, "Because I don't."

His eyes fell to hers then. The raw emotion on display mirrored all that he felt. He allowed a hand to bury itself within the thick coil of her hair and cradle the back of her head. She leaned into his touch it was something that she had missed.

The only thing that I regret is that it has to end.

They were leaning into each other now. They were so close that their breathing intertwined into one teasing them both with the promise of a kiss upon each's parted lips. He wanted this…so much, but he knew that even settling for a kiss would undo everything. So with deep regret, but complete resolve, he pulled away.

"It was fun spending time with you." He spoke looking at her levelly. "Real life calls to us now and you have a lot to look forward to."

She swallowed the hard lump in her throat and nodded slowly. She would not allow tears that threatened to come to even grace the corners of her eyes. Both knew that this day would come.

"I hope-" she looked away briefly, then back at him, "if you ever need to talk or anything…"

"Right back at you."

"I should go and see Jane."

He nodded and watched as she walked away.

Lust for Life

Lana Del Rey featuring The Weeknd

This is a song that I am completely obsessed with. Lana Del Rey's voice paired with The Weeknd (my current favorite singer) is magic for me. Hope that you enjoy this little snippet of a story.