I'd just like to apologise for the long wait. I've been very busy with exams and revision and stuff. I know Abberation is pretty much dead now, but i'd still like to continue this story. More reviews would be appreciated. Thanks.
It's been a month, and things have only gotten worse. I've made no progress. It feels as if i'm moving in circles, but there is another possibility. That possibility is that there is no way to the surface. Escape is impossible. I try to clear that thought out of my mind every day, but no matter how hard i try, i cannot help myself from believing it to be true. Corruption has begun to invade my mind once again. I thought i had rid myself of all these dark thoughts, but they call for me every day. It worries me that i may succumb to my inner deep desires soon. It all started with my horrific act over a month ago. I murdered an innocent creature in order to save my own life. But in what way was my life more important than theirs? I think of it now as a misuse of power. All the visions i had, all the dreams, were just the evil parts of my brain manipulating me into doing something no normal, caring, real human could have done. I guess a person really can't change. No matter how hard i try to bury my past it will always come crawling back to me like some recurring nightmare. I'm unstable, maniacal, and possibly the most powerful being in the whole of this hell-bound land. It's funny to think how scared i was of this place originally. It should be scared of me. Yet, fear still overcomes me. I don't want to die a villain. I want to feel redemption. I want to feel like someone who people can look up to. But, when you're all alone in a place like this, and you're someone like me, it's virtually impossible.
Threats continue to confront me also. I've been noticing more and more Raptors as i move through the jungle, so i'm almost constantly buried and hiding under mud. Those mushrooms however are possibly the most dangerous of them all. Every time a patch of mushrooms is at least a few meters away from me, i hear them shrieking out my name, trying to poison me again. Considering how much more broken i am now, an attack from the mushrooms would likely be fatal. Who knows what could happen if i allowed myself to go near them again. That being said, i always feel there's something more dangerous out there. Something even less evil, something more, destructive, reckless. I don't know if i've been imagining it, but sometimes, during nights, i hear noises. Grunting, snuffling. It may sound like nothing, but these noises are different. They're native. They sound as if they belong here, and nowhere but here. Every animal makes noises, but whatever is making those noises, it's no animal.
Food has been scarce. I've been mostly living off berries and edible mushrooms. The mushrooms in particular are more diverse here than anywhere i've ever experienced. I was extremely skeptical about cooking the first batch of mushrooms that i found, especially after the toxic mushroom incident. But ever since that incident those mushrooms call out to me whenever i'm near, so it's easy to spot the poisonous from the non-poisonous. However, mushrooms and berries still aren't enough to live off. At least once a week i have to go out hunting. In fact, i should probably begin a hunt now. I pack up my things, and cross the river. This side of the river should be full of Dodos, as up to this point i've only hunted on the other side. It's similar, although different at the same time. There's something about this side of the river that feels… safe. I might set up camp here tonight if there aren't any complications. It takes me a while to find any suitable food, but luckily i happen upon a cluster of Dodos at the very bottom of the river. And then it hits me. The bottom of the river. I've never gotten to the bottom of the river before. It always seemed to turn and put right back where i started. Finally, after 30 days of pain and suffering, i've took my first step to escaping this place. I want to scream out in joy, but luckily, i have some self control. I quickly sneak over to the cluster of Dodos, and without hesitation i slit all their throats, one by one. If i ration, i should be fine for food for the next couple of days. I can't even remember how unstable i've been for the last few days, because now, finally, my time here has a purpose. My actions since i got here have meaning. Sure, i've still got a long way to go, but i'm one step closer to the surface, one step closer to pride, and one step closer to forgiveness. I set up camp, and prepare for what i expect to be my best night's sleep since i got here.
It's early in the morning, and all is silent. I slept well, a dreamless sleep for once. I describe them as dreams, but they're quite the opposite. Dreams are supposed to be full of hope, but what i experience is pretty much hopeless. The best word i'd use to describe them is nightmares, although that still doesn't sound right. I begin to roll up my sleeping bag, when i notice something a couple hundred meters away from me. And the first word i can think of to describe it as, is a glimmer of hope. A house. Thatch-built, sure, but still a house, nonetheless. I am well and truly not alone. Or was. We'll see. I don't even bother to pick up my things before i begin to make my way over to this place. The first thing i notice about the house before i even reach it is that whoever built it clearly wasn't very experienced. The thatch is falling out of the string keeping it steady, and the house has holes in it all around the sides. Maybe i can pass on some of my knowledge to this person, teach them how to survive in places like this. There is a campfire, not too dissimilar to mine, right outside the house and it seems it didn't go out too long ago. I can still feel the heat, radiating off of it, and i smell the strong scent of the ash burnt out from the logs. And then, i find myself at the front door. Wow. My future best friend could be right behind this door. I take a heavy and deep breath, composing myself. Here we go. I knock. No answer. It is early, maybe they aren't awake yet. I should probably wait a couple hours, wait for them to come out. I lie down on the grass, next to the campfire, contemplating. What should i say? What will they say? Who are they?
I awake to a loud buzzing. Damn. I fell asleep. And it was a long sleep. It's the middle of the night. Even after the best sleep i've had for thirty days, i'm still knackered. The buzzing i heard was just a small fly which had landed on my ear. Suddenly, i realise. The person who lives in the house must have seen me here, surely. So why didn't they wake me up? I look over at the campfire, and it's unchanged. Enough is enough. I've given in to impatience. I don't care if it's the middle of the night, i'm going in there. I storm to the front door, and once, again, with a heavy sigh, i compose myself, before opening the door. Right then and there, all my theories and predictions are broken in an instant. A deadly horror bestrickens my eyes. From the ugly, thatch ceiling, a rope is attached, and hanging from it, in a noose, is the body of the man who once lived here. On the walls, written in blood, it reads: there is no hope. I begin to breathe heavily, shocked, horrified, scarred. I have to get out of here. I stumble out of the house, struggling for breath. Running behind the house, i begin to throw up on the grass, on my hands and knees, and when i look up, i see it. I'm on a massive cliff face, and beyond it, i see a beautiful, but enormous luminous marshland. It's beautiful, glowing blue in the night, so different to anything i've ever seen before. But, when i think hope is restored, i realise it's filled to the brim with every possible deadly prehistoric creature you could think of. Megalosaurus, Arthropluera, Titanoboa, i could go on for days. Right then and there, is the time, and the moment that my hope, was shattered.