The Kidnap of Hermione Granger
Email: [email protected]
Rating: PG
Summary: Someone's planning to kidnap Hermione, and with plenty of luck, it might actually succeed. H/Hr
Disclaimer: Oh yes, it's all going to be mine someday. I have plans of world domination, you see.
Author's Note: *Looks suspicious* do people actually read this thing? Testing, testing 123, the icebergs are melting. I have my doubts.
Old
friend of mine,
we will never lose the time
That
we shared all these years
These years
Will
you make it in the end?
Through all the twists and bends,
Will you full fill your dreams?
Not as easy as it seems.
Killing Heidi, Weir
It was positively insane; the amount of reading Hermione was putting away. Prodigious, was the word that she'd have preferred to be used, but there was no denying the fact that it had started to border on the range of lunacy.
Or so said Ron.
Privately Harry had started to agree as well. He simply didn't understand how the day could proceed with the sun outside being such a muted golden, the sky a sapphire sea with white clouds pretending to be boats, manage to be a Saturday at the same time, and co-exist with the word 'indoors'.
"Come on… it'll just be for an hour or so. And we'll even let you bring that thing."
Ron refused to call the thick tome Hermione was leafing through a book. Torture device, paper weight, rubbish, were the words that sprung more readily to mind.
But then again, the written word had never really interested Ron.
"Absolutely not!" she looked horrified, wide dark eyes opened still wider, the friendly mouth this time shaped in a surprised 'o'.
She really looked very pretty when she did that…
Harry blinked once or twice.
"The NEWTs are in a few months! Honestly, Ron, have some self-control. And Harry," she snapped at him, "Don't you still have that Charms essay to complete?"
Drat. He'd forgotten about that.
Harry sat down on the sofa next to Hermione and heaved a great sigh. Ron followed suit. They alternated sighing and looking gloomy, without success, for after a few furtive glances, Harry could tell Hermione's resolve wasn't breaking down anytime soon.
Oh well. A Charms essay was in order.
Ron was not very happy. In fact, he was down right mad. And those were in mild terms.
He'd passed up a perfectly wonderful day to sulk on the sofa. And it hadn't been his fault either, he thought as he glared heavily at the two figures beside him.
One was pretending to study, but he just knew it was a cover-up and she was really a double-agent for Snape and was using this thickish device to transmit information to him. Or she could be really studying, but that was ludicrous. No one could like studying that much. Could they?
And as for the other one… the one that pretended to be his best mate… had actually deserted lines and joined enemy ranks. Pooey. How very base of him.
He'd known it would be a lost cause the second Harry had begun staring at Hermione.
At this the carefully positioned lower lip nearly twitched upward in a grin. He bit his lip, trying to remain in Sulking Pose, and succeeded in a rather fearsome imitation of Crabbe's smile instead. Oh well.
Whoever Harry thought he was kidding, he was not. Or, depending on your point of view, he actually had. Considering the main person he seemed to be trying to trick was himself.
Ron had read about this somewhere, probably in one of Mrs. Weasley's copious editions of Witch Weekly. Self Denial or something. The witch in question had actually been named Martha and she was in love with a very ugly wizard called Edward, but Ron Weasley felt he could bloody tell that the situation at hand was the same.
He'd endured about three weeks of this Denial stuff, and had started feeling rather bored. It had been rather interesting at first, seeing the Boy Who Lived becoming the Confused Boy Who Lived, and Ron had even been surprised to find a few sparks of jealously within him.
After all, Hermione had very definitely turned out pretty. The bushy hair hadn't exactly settled down, and the face was still just starting to become defined, but the signs were there that the transition had begun. And as any red-blooded male, Ron fully appreciated her very nice curves. But still, the starts of jealousy had condensed into amusement. It was just so fun to see Harry so confused.
As for Hermione, although he was rather sure she'd not got a crush on Harry, it was certainly possible it could happen in the near future, and make that the very near future. Just a little push in the right direction. All thanks to their brilliant pal Ron Weasley. They could thank him by naming their first son after him. Or daughter.
But now there were more pressing matters at hand. Like how Hermione was practically building a playhouse out of all her books, with History and Potions essays to fill up the chinks. Stress, he knew very well, was not good for the heart. And he did care about his friends. Hermione would have to lighten up soon, before that house came crashing down.
So he'd tried to take her out more, drag both of them along for walks and general goofing around.
And Hermione, being Hermione, had given him a glare and proceeded with 'Good Studying Habits for Young Wizards and Witches'. It was most exasperating.
"It's most exasperating," Harry heard Ron comment as they went up the steps to the dorms.
Again, and once more privately, Harry agreed. Hermione's revising had been taking a slightly maniacal turn lately. She hadn't stepped out of Hogswart in a month.
"We need to do something about it. Something. Something something something."
And Ron wasn't really helping by flailing his arms in Harry's face and looking cross.
"You. You do something. I've tried means and ways, but I tell you, I'm stumped."
Harry apprehensively cleared his throat. And then again, trying to buy time.
"Erm."
"Ah… now, if we were to force her to go."
"Well…"
"An modus operandi!"
"I..."
"We can kidnap her! Very good!"
"I don't…"
"Operation Kidnap. The Great Kidnap. Which do you prefer?"
"Ron…"
"Thanks Harry! Been a great help, you have! We'll work out the details tomorrow."
"I don't think Hermione's going to like this very much. Ron… Ron?"
But Ron had fallen asleep.
What, ho! I've always wanted to kidnap someone. Goodie. Please review, I'd really really reeaaally appreciate it. It's only nice, okay? *Pokes your conscience*