Summer of 2012

Well, what do I do now to my life?

I, Anastasia Rose Steele, am literally, watching my future passing in front of me.
And I feel so stupid to be here, I feel like na intruse in the middle of a big party, so much joy and celebrating, but my best friend insisted that I come and her family too, but they were also part of my life.

And here I am, on a yate, in the middle of Pacific Ocean, off the islands of Hawaii, no chance to hide, of being able to dig a hole and corner me there forever and drown my sorrows,cry for what I've had but I'll never have, this pain in my chest
that makes me suffocate without being able to breathe…

"One, two, three. Calm, Ana. Take a deep breath. One, two, three." During this whole week, I lost the count of the number of times I have repeated this mantra. I shake my hand, against my face, like a fan, so that by some miracle the tears that
are emerging in my eyes will come back.

Keep a happy face, Ana. Take a deep breath. Tell me my inside voice, that helps me keep my cool this moment. You do not want to start crying here, they're going to be worried about you, you can not have the focus tonight for yourself.

"I need get out of here!" Yah. Great. Great idea. But where? I am in the fucking middle of the ocean!

I start walking through of the crowd, giving a short wave and a short smile to those who greet me. The should be around 30 people here, including families, close friends and staff.

Fortunately, it is a luxurious yacht, which has been rented for the occasion, has plenty of room for people to walk without being in the hustle and bustle. Ecstasea

I find myself at the back of the yacht, leaning my arms over the guardrail with a glass of champagne in my hand, and begin to watch the bubbling water that is propelled by the propellers and re-launched backwards as the yacht moves.

And now, I wonder how I got to this point in my life? Will I ever be happy as I once was? Is there any god out there who's cheering for me? I hope so, because this desperation is ending me.

And when I see the water, I completely lose myself in my memories, which were once the happiest days of my life.

A.N.: Hi, Hello everybody. So just a few notes.

First one: english isn't my native linguage, so if you find any kind of errors, ... Well I hope that I could written the best I can in ways that you can understand.

Second: I know that you are tired of being asked to review, I understand because I read a lot. But if you can just do a review like "yes, ok, Or I liked" or "no, nope or I don't like" it's cool whatever. It's just for me to know how my story is being received.

Third: well, I don't have a third note LOL.

Laters, baby

D tsunGirl