Disclaimer - don't own any of them (ok, I came up with Koya but she's not around for long) and so all kudos to Joss Whedon et al.

A/N - this starts during Entropy so I guess there are spoilers up to the end of that episode, but it's not really cannon so…

And thanks as always to Trisha.


Bunny Be Mine - chapter 1

"Oh…oh my god…" Buffy felt sick.

There, on the computer screen for all to see, were Spike's movements over Anya. Her hands clutching his body to hers. Sex. On the table of the Magic Shop.

How? How did this happen? And why did Buffy care? Why did it hurt so much?

"Wow. That's…they're going at it like bunnies!" Willow was mesmerised.

Like bunnies…animals. They're animals. Spike's just an animal. Buffy had known but it still shook her.

She hated them.

"Like bunnies…like animals…that's what they are…that's what I should've understood. He's not human. He's a demon. All stamina, no decency. Like a machine. Yeah, he's like a non-stop Energizer bunny." It disgusted and disturbed her for reasons she didn't want to go into. And she couldn't look away. "Why does he get to look so human? He should look like the animal he is." Maybe then it would all be easier.

"You wish."

"Oh yeah." Buffy's response was heartfelt. But that hadn't sounded like Willow. "What?"

Buffy turned round to see a demon standing behind her, face ridged and veined. And smiling like it was Christmas.

"Wish granted."


Anya was barely aware of who she was holding, who was above her, too caught up in finally having someone want her after so much rejection.

Spike was almost mindless, lost in the physical actions of being close to someone, anyone, after being pushed away and kept alone.

The moans and groans coming from both their throats as they tried to find comfort in each other were the only sounds in the darkened shop. The names they wanted to call out, the loved ones they wanted to touch weren't here. They made do and lost themselves in the false warmth of alcohol and sex.

Anya slid her hands up Spike's back, picturing broader shoulders and a longer body.

Spike kept his eyes closed, imagining hazel eyes and stronger muscles. Tried to feel Buffy's hands in his hair. Strived for a release that wouldn't come.

The fingers scraping at his scalp spoke of desperation. At least that was familiar.

In her mind's eye Anya saw dark locks twisting though her hands and held the image as she started moved her palms over the curve of his skull, wanting to touch his face and open her eyes to a warm brown gaze. But it all felt wrong. The gel crisped curls, the fur…

The fur?

Anya's eyes flew open and she screamed.


"Hallie? I told you not to come back here." Buffy tried to keep one eye on the demon while still looking around for a weapon. Dammit, why did she keep everything either in the living room or her bedroom? Shouldn't there at least be an axe in the dining room in case of emergencies? And maybe some Advil would be good 'cos she was developing a killer headache. On second thoughts, she was gonna need Percocet and lots of it. And why was Willow just sitting there, staring awe struck at the intruder? Hello, weapons would be kinda useful right now.

"Sorry, young lady. You've got the wrong demon. Honestly, being the Slayer you should be able to tell us apart. I'm Koya. I answer the call of warriors. Wouldn't find me anywhere near children. Horrible, whiney little beasts" She gave an unmistakable shudder of distaste.

On closer inspection Buffy could see the difference. This Koya, or whatever she called herself, was taller than Hallie. And there were other differences, the hair and clothes. But the big one was her voice was much softer, less strident. Not that it didn't stop her from being irritating and in full need of slayage.

"So not the point. What are you doing here? Make it quick 'cos you were just leaving. Head first through the window." There might not be a weapon nearby but hands-on violence was always an option.

Koya raised an eyebrow and gave a superior smile as she smoothed down the lines of her dress. The shifting of the demons facial ridges as her expression changed had an almost hypnotic effect on Buffy. She shook her head, trying to clear it of the haze that started building at the sight of the Magic Box Live Sex Show and had steadily increased with the presence of Koya. No way was the headache gonna shift with just a Percocet. Chances were that nothing short of decapitation would help now. Maybe decapitating the demon rather than herself would do the trick?

"No need to be testy. I heard your call and I answered. Just doing my job. And doing it very well I might add."

Buffy was outraged. "I never called anybody! See, been standing right here, all with the not calling."

"Oh but your soul cried out to me for vengeance on your lover who betrayed you." Koya looked smug as the Slayer tried to find words. All Buffy seemed to be able to manage was a fish impression and the occasional gasp.

"Buffy?" Willow's concerned voice broke the silence. "What's she talking about? What lover?"

Willow's voice snapped Buffy back to reality. Less talk, more action. Always a good plan.

"Not now, Will. Got a demon to kill." Really, she was gonna have to start keeping that axe in here.

"Foolish girl." Koya turned her attention to the redhead. "The lover you've both been watching. And I must say he is rather delicious. I can see why Anyanka would want to take him for a spin. Much more appealing than that oaf she was going to marry. Although he did get her back into vengeance so he can't be all bad, I suppose." Koya took a moment to ponder the idea and then a look of distaste crossed her face. "What am I saying? The guy was a jerk. I'm surprised, though. It's not like Anyanka to fool around with someone who's taken." The demon tilted her head to one side as she returned to studying the Slayer.

"Taken? What? No!! No taking of any kind. Uh-uh. Nope. Never happened." An axe would really put an end to all this talking. All this totally unnecessary talking. Maybe before Willow could ask-

"You've been sleeping with Spike?" Now Willow was really starting to worry. Buffy was through worry and out the other side.

"No. No no no no no no no." At Willow's disbelieving look Buffy's shoulders slumped. Oh crap. "Yeah. But not anymore. All over. No Spike…boinking for Buffy. It was bad…and…and evil. I got it under control. Anya's welcome to him, the ho."

"How strange. You say it's over, yet your call was so strong." Why wouldn't this demon let it go already? Buffy had already been humiliated and God knew when Willow would forgive her. If she ever did. "There was a definite possessiveness to it, all wrapped around that lovely feeling of betrayal. Are you sure it was over because it didn't sound like that to me when I heard you clear to New York. Not that it matters. You've got your wish so I'll just be going."

As the demon raised her arms to announce her disappearance, Buffy pushed her into a chair with a firm hand to the chest.

"My wish? What wish?"

"Ummm Buffy'?" She turned back to Willow and then looked to where the ex-wicca was pointing. The screen still showed the Magic Box still but where there had previously been the sickening sight of Spike and Anya making the beast with two backs, now she saw Anya running around screaming. And Spike looking stunned. She felt rather stunned herself. Rabbit ears kinda suited the blond vamp.


"Oh bloody Hell, Anya! What the fuck did you do?" Spike glared at the panicked shopkeeper as he hesitantly scratched himself behind the ears. Damn, these things were itchy. Did they come complete with fleas or what?

"B…..b….b…aaaarrrrhhhhhhhggggg" Didn't look like he was gonna be getting much sense out of demon bird in the near future. His head was starting to ache from a combination of too much booze, far too much high pitched screaming and the additional weight his skull had suddenly acquired. It was proving a real effort just to hold his head up. His balance was shot to hell.

He could feel his control slipping. All the screaming was making his demon want to come out to play. He could really do with a spot of violence right now. Get rid of some of the fear that was starting to build up inside him.

*Right, Spike old son, just let it go. Maybe you can't wreak your wrath in the hallowed Scooby sanctum but no reason you can't have a good old fashioned roar. Might help take the load off.*

Spike dropped his head back and let the demon surge forth, opening his mouth to howl. All that came out was a high pitched squeal that rivalled Anya's and pierced his eardrums. Which didn't do much for his headache. Or his temper.

"What the hell is going on here?" he yelled, licking lips that where suddenly dry with apprehension. Something else wasn't right. Where his tongue should have encountered the sharp points of his fangs there was nothing. He moved his tongue further back in his jaw. Nope, no all powerful incisors. Tried running the tip back along his teeth to the front, just in case he'd missed them. And let out another unSpike(-)like squeal.

His front teeth, which normally nestled between his fangs and closer to his gum line, had lengthened and thickened. So much so that they now ended below his front lip.

He had bloody Bugs Bunny teeth!!!!


"Well, as I said, I really must be going. Enjoy your wish!" With a clap of her hands, Koya took the opportunity afforded by Buffy staring at the image of Spike to vanish.

"But I… dammit! Willow, did you hear me make a wish. Cos I sure don't remember it. No way would I make a wish. Hello, can you say 'the party that wouldn't end'? And she's gone! No answers for Buffy. This is so not good. And where the hell is Xander? Xander!!!"

As Buffy headed for the door of the dining room, yelling for the missing carpenter, Willow was still transfixed by the sight before her. It was kinda cool that Spike now had two sets of ears. If his hearing was better than human with just vamp ears, how much better would it be with the additional set? Would he let them run tests? See how he responded to dog whistles or if he could hear one of them calling him from the other side of town?

"Will, I can't find Xander. And Dawn's locked herself in her room. Guess she ran out after her glimpse of the Anya and Spike sexathon. I'm getting the idea that Xan went at the same time, cos I don't see him being quiet when there's a vengeance demon in the house. But I guess the shock might've shut him up. What do you think? And you know I didn't make a wish, right? I mean, why would I? No, there's absolutely no need for Buffy wishes. Why would there be? Nothing. Nada. Zip. Zilch."

Willow turned from her thoughts of empirical tests to stare, open mouthed, at her babbling friend. This was bad. Really bad. Buffy was in full on denial mode. Which meant there was something to deny. Was there more to this than the Spike… sex? And ewww. More than she was letting on? Was it really over?

"Buffy, are you still sleeping with Spike? 'Cos, I mean, if you are, no biggy. Well, way biggy. But I'm okay with it. Or I will be, you know, when I've stopped mentally wigging over the idea. I mean, Spike? You had sex with Spike? And you didn't tell me? Oh, hey, sorry. Not the issue right now. 'Cos if you are still sleeping with him then this…" she waved a hand at the screen in front of her "…this really sucks, what with the betrayal and all. You okay?"

The Slayer was slumped in a chair, head in hands. Willow couldn't tell if she was crying or just thinking big thoughts. As the redhead made a move to get up, Buffy raised her eyes to her friend's face. Buffy's expression was one of absolute exhaustion. As she started to speak a flicker of movement on the computer screen caught her attention.

So that's where Xander had got to.