Hardest Time Of Year
Disclaimer: I don't own anything from the television series Supergirl and I'm not making any money from this fic
Summary: The first Christmas after Winn's father escapes from prison is the hardest. And everyone else is caught up in their lives and don't notice. Written for this prompt: 'All I want for Christmas is someone to notice me.' Fills the winter holiday celebration square in the Advent Holiday Bingo blackout
Warning(s): Spanking; spoilers for the first season of Supergirl; swearing; some drunken behaviour
Author's Note: Another new fandom for me. Hope you enjoy reading!
Winn looked around his apartment and shook his head. He wasn't even sure why he'd bothered with a tree this year at all. It had seemed like a good idea at the time, but now that he was looking at it, yet another beer can in his hand, he couldn't really figure out what he'd been thinking.
Finishing the rest of the beer, Winn dropped the empty can into the trash. He then sat down on the sofa and sighed. "Merry fucking Christmas," he muttered, before opening yet another can and draining half the contents in one swallow.
Feeling slightly buzzed, Winn stared at the tree in one corner of the room, that looked empty both on the branches and underneath. He shook his head and snorted softly. Maybe he should have invited some of the others. Even if they'd said no, at least he'd have made the effort. But he hadn't celebrated the holidays before. When his father had first been taken away and he realised the man he'd looked up to for so long wasn't the hero he'd grown up thinking he was.
The sound of the buzzer drew Winn's attention from staring morosely at the tree. He blinked and glanced towards the door, thinking seriously about ignoring it. Pretending he wasn't in. After all, who would be coming round to see him at this time?
The buzzer sounded again, the beeping now longer and more insistent. Winn sighed, putting his can of beer down, and walked over to the door. Without bothering to check the peephole, he pulled open the door...and then frowned in confusion as he saw James standing on the other side of the door. He cocked his head to one side as he struggled to focus through the tipsy haze induced by the alcohol. "Did we make plans?"
"Can I come in?" James asked.
"Sure. I guess." It wasn't like he had any plans apart from to get drunk enough to black out from the memories, after all. Winn took a step back and motioned for James to enter. "What are you doing here?" he asked.
James walked into the apartment, closing the door behind him and having a look around before he focused on Winn. "You don't have any plans?"
Winn gave a shrug. "I'm usually on my own for the holidays. I'm used to it by now. Why are you on your own?" He turned the question around.
"Lucy's with her dad. I'm seeing her tomorrow." James walked to stand in front of the rather-bare looking tree and then turned to Winn with raised eyebrows. "Didn't feel like decorating much this year?"
"I didn't feel like celebrating much this year." Winn walked into the kitchen even as he asked, "You want a beer?" Opening the fridge, he frowned as he added, "I've got soda...a couple of bottles of sparkling water. Or you could have tea or coffee. I can probably make up some hot chocolate."
"Do you think maybe you've had a bit too much to drink?"
Winn blinked and then frowned, closing the fridge and making eye contact with James. "Why are you here?" he asked outright.
"Because I knew you'd be on your own. I figured you could do with the company. I figured we could both do with the company." After a pause, James added, "Actually, I might take a coffee."
"Great." Winn walked over to the coffee maker and set it up. After a pause, he decided that he'd drunk enough that adding any more to the total would mean the next morning was going to be even more miserable, so he made two coffees. "You know, we're not actually friends."
"That's an odd comment to come out with."
"Not really." Winn handed James one of the cups and took the other for himself. "The only way I could see you coming here was if Kara told you to check on me."
James shook his head even as he sipped the coffee. "Kara wouldn't tell me to check up on you. She'd come here herself."
"I suppose." And the fact that only his rival was here, checking up on him? Well, Winn figured Kara was caught up in what was happening in her life. She had a lot to deal with, after all. And he was used to merely being an afterthought. "You don't have to stay, you know."
"Did you miss the part where I'm on my own too?"
"So you figure two loners can get past that by hanging out with each other?" Winn snorted softly.
James took a deep breath and set his cup down on the counter. He walked over to Winn, standing close enough to the other man that they could be touching if either of them took even a half step towards the other. "You know I'm a journalist..." he began.
Winn glanced at him sideways. "Actually, I think that little fact might have escaped my notice."
"I did some digging," James said. "I have a fairly good idea of why this time of year is so difficult for you. I know who your father is."
If he'd been fully sober, Winn knew he would have been offended by the fact James had dug into his past instead of approaching him and asking him directly...though Winn had to admit, at least to himself, that he wouldn't have answered James' questions and would in fact have given him attitude if he'd tried. Right now, though, he was still tipsy from the beer he'd drunk and he raised his cup in a mock cheer. "Congratulations. Now you know all of my daddy issues."
"I know why the holidays are tough for you," James answered. "I want to help you."
Winn blinked and tilted his head to one side. "How are you planning to help me?" He set his own cup down, realising he wasn't really that thirsty anyway.
"Follow me." James walked back into the main room.
Winn blinked, but slowly trailed after the other man. He stood in the doorway and watched as James sat on the couch. "You're sitting down."
"Yeah. I am." James patted the cushion next to him. "Come sit next to me."
Winn eyed him suspiciously. "This isn't some kind of come-on, right?"
"No. I just want to talk."
To be honest, Winn hadn't meant that as a serious question, but he couldn't help but hear the serious note in James' voice. Raising his eyebrows once more, he walked over and sat down on the couch next to James. "Okay. What are we talking about?"
"You don't like the holidays."
Winn looked at James and then at the sparsely decorated tree. "Are we just stating the obvious here?"
"I can see you're struggling with getting past what happened and letting yourself enjoy the holidays," James said. "I figured I can help you let go of the stress and tension that's made you drink...eight cans of beer?" He peered into the trash.
"Ten, actually," Winn muttered. He sighed. "Okay. So what's your suggestion for this? A massage? Therapy? Hugging?"
"No, none of those things," James answered. He kept his eyes focused on the tree as he said, "I'm talking about a spanking."
Winn stared at the other man, his eyes widening. "A...?" He swallowed and tried to speak again. "A spanking? I don't think I got one even when I was a kid." Maybe it was the alcohol dulling his senses that was stopping him from laughing in James' face. As much as he'd considered the other man a rival for Kara's affections, he had a lot of respect for him. It was just... "A spanking?" he repeated.
"Do you think it'll sound different if you say it another way?"
"Why are you even suggesting it?" Winn asked.
James shrugged. "It's a little personal, so I'd appreciate it if you didn't mention this to anyone else, but I had someone else step in with me back when I was working at the Daily Planet. It wasn't pleasant, but it helped me a lot."
"And why do you want to 'help' me?"
"Because I like you." James shrugged. "I know we don't always get on, but I'd still like to think we are friends."
"Okay." Winn shook his head. "This is probably the alcohol talking, but...what do you want me to do?"
James didn't answer with words, instead grasping Winn's shoulders and gently easing him across his lap.
Winn gulped as his stomach lurched and his head spun. He could feel James' thighs under his stomach and the grip move from his shoulder down to his pants. He stiffened up as his pants and underwear were tugged down, baring his backside and leaving him feeling exposed and vulnerable.
The first smack took him by surprise and he jumped, biting his lip. A second and third smack landed and he winced, then couldn't help beginning to squirm as James settled quickly into a rhythm, swatting down to his thighs before starting over from the top.
The smacks weren't particularly hard, but they were repetitive and stung as James covered skin he'd already swatted. Winn began to shift even more, wincing as his bottom began to heat up. "How is this even supposed to help?" he demanded.
"You know that you're not actually alone, right?" James asked. "You don't have to be alone for the holidays. You've got a lot of friends who would willingly invite you if they knew you were on your own."
Winn blinked and his eyes began to water. He tried for a sarcastic response, but what came out just sounded lost. "No one actually wants an extra person."
"Why do you think I'm here?"
"I..." Winn blinked, lost for words. He winced as the spanking started up again and began to squirm even more, especially when James began targeting more swats to his sit spots and thighs. He wasn't sure if James was actually swatting harder, but it certainly felt like he was being smacked harder.
"I'm here with you because we are friends," James said. "And I want to spend Christmas with you and with Lucy. I mean, we can do that here...or you're more than welcome to come to mine."
"So...you want me?" Winn flinched at the hopeful note in his voice. And then he cringed when he realised exactly how he'd worded that question. "I mean...you want me there?"
"Yeah. I want you," James stated.
Winn took a deep breath and then let it out in a shuddering sigh. The tears filling his eyes began to trickle down his cheeks and he let out a tiny sob. "Yeah...okay. I believe you," he whispered. The alcohol was sitting heavy on his stomach.
James pulled his clothing back into place and then helped Winn to stand before getting to his feet as well. "Why don't we head to my apartment now? We can pick up some takeout on the way."
"Sure." Winn hesitantly grinned. "Sounds like a plan."