H'ors d'oeuvres

Chapter one of the Dinner and Dessert Series

by the Black Rose

A Full Metal Panic! Fanfic.

AN: Don't look at me like that.  How could I resist writing fanfiction for a series that centered around a guy that looks just like Heero (from GW), bodyguarding for a beautiful girl (with a paper fan)?  Relena needs to take notes from Kaname.

Kaname: See, you hold the paper fan like this, and swing through with your whole arm.

Relena: *picks up fan and attempts the motion*

Kaname: That's good.  Yeah, you've got it.  Okay, so now you just need to practice using it on someone.  Oh, Kurz....

Kurz: *backs away* Ooooh no.  If I'm not getting any, I'm not going to be your whipping boy.

Relena: *smiles slyly* Oooooh, Heero.  What were you saying about that 'mission' of yours again?

Heero: *stands rigidly* It is my duty to protect you.  Nothing more, nothing---


Heero: *___*  Who gave her a paper fan? *thud*


Sousuke: *falls down next to Heero* She did.

Heero: -___-;;;


Chapter 1

            Blood raced through Kaname's body like a steam engine locomotive on a one-way track. And her face felt as hot as the coal furnace burning deep inside.  She stared at the floor, her eyes not daring to look at the dark-haired boy who accompanied her.

"You can come in, if you want.  I mean, you're here for the weekend, you don't have to go already, do you?"


            Kaname managed a lopsided smile at him before turning her key in the lock.  She opened the door wide, permitting Sousuke to step inside first.  He took his typical rigid stance, arms behind his back as his eyes traveled over the room.  Of course he'd seen the inside of her apartment before....

            "You moved the shelves," he nodded.  "And your table is six inches to the right."

            Oh dear lord.  She frowned at her...her...whatever he was and decided to try talking his language for once.  "At ease," she said in a teasing tone.

            He turned and regarded her out of the corner of his eye.  "I am."

            "You look like you're about to salute my fish."

            His brow furrowed and his bottom lip stuck out ever so slightly.  "I don't understand."

            "Sousuke...." She felt the building exasperation dissipate.  He was too cute when he was being clueless.  She sighed and took his arm, pulling him over to the couch.  There was something she wanted to settle with him.  Something she had to know....

            He took a seat, keeping his feet evenly spaced on the floor and shoulders squared.  The sergeant stared straight ahead, hands flat against his thighs.  Kaname sank down next to him and scooted closer.


            "What is it?"  He seemed entranced by his view of the front door.  Grey eyes shifted when Kaname's knee brushed against his.  The contact made him turn his head.  He met her gaze for moment, then returned his attention to the door.

            "Ummmm....Would you like some tea? Or coffee? I could make some."

            "I'm fine." 

            "Oh."  Kaname twisted and untwisted her fingers, then let her hands drop to her lap.  Silence hung between them like a heavy curtain, and still, he wouldn't look at her.  How could he just sit there and not say a word?

 She took a deep breath.  "Sousuke?"

            "What is it?"

            "I...you don't have to protect me anymore?"

            He finally moved and faced her, but now she found that she was the one unable to look at him.  "No.  The threat was neutralized.  You shouldn't be in any further danger."

            "Oh, I see."  The blue-haired girl chewed her lip as she finally allowed her eyes to drift upwards.  This wasn't going well at all.  And he wasn't helping just sitting there like a big rock.  She sighed.

            "Is something wrong?"

            "I...I'll miss you." 

            "We have phones and electronic mail."

            His tense expressions softened, even if just a little.  Kaname felt a surge heat flood her cheeks.  She smiled at him.  "And you'll come visit me?" 

            "Yes.  I...I like your company.  You'll go fishing with me when I come to visit?"

            Kaname nodded.


            He glanced at his watch and shot up in one swift motion, as if something had pinched his backside.  Why am I thinking about his - ?



"I should leave.  It's getting late."  He started across the room and Kaname stood still, dazedly watching his departure until her mind kicked in and forced her feet to follow.

 "How often do you get time away from Mithril?"

            "It depends," he shrugged.  "It could be six months or longer before I am able to come, depending on my next assignment."

            "Oh.  That long?"

            "It won't seem that long."  His tone seemed unaffected. 

            Kaname fought to take deep, even breaths.  She could hear the tremor in her own voice.           "I think it will seem terribly long."

            "The busier you are, the faster the time goes."

            "Yes, but...If it will be that long before I can see you again, then...."  She had to look away.  She blinked away the tears threatening to invade her eyes, and slowly turned back to him.


            "Sousuke...I, uh...where are you staying? While you're here?"

            "I'm packing up the remaining equipment at the safe house across the street.  I'm to return the key and pay any additional fees tomorrow.  I will most likely stay in a hotel for tomorrow night."

            He reached for the doorknob, but stopped when she placed her palm over the top of his hand.

            "You could stay here. With me. It'd be no trouble.  I'd enjoy the company."

            Sousuke nodded. 

            "I'll make dinner for your last night.  Something special."

            She dropped her hand, and he pulled the door open.  "You don't have to, Kaname."

            "But I want to!"

            "Yes, I...."


            The soldier stepped out into the hallway, the glow of the florescent light spreading over his unreadable features.  "I should be going.  Good night, Kaname."

            "Good night. See you tomorrow."

            He nodded, and she had to close the door.  She sank back against it, and buried her face in her hands.  "He can be so weird sometimes."


            The door shut, and he turned to stare at the oak panel.  Stay here? He sighed.  She doesn't mean it that way.  Stop thinking that...Work. I have to complete the assignment. He trudged down the hall to the elevator, but couldn't help looking back at her apartment one last time.

            "You could stay here. With me.  I'll make dinner...something special."

            Sousuke swallowed against the hard lump that had caught in his throat.  "What am I supposed to do?"

            The apartment seemed empty without Kurz and Melissa's friendly banter.  He didn't understand why they said some of the things they did to one another, and they seemed to speak a different language than he did most of the time, but he had never felt lonely when they were there.

            He paced from one end of the room to the other, his mind drifting and resurfacing; remembered information, puzzles, rehashed themselves in his brain.

            "I apologize for missing our appointment.  I was busy and forgot."

            "Oh sure. Fine, whatever." Kaname waved her hand in the air.

"You're not mad?"


            "Good."  He started off in the opposite direction; one minute, his feet moved underneath him, the next he was face down on the floor.  "Ka- Kaname?"

            She had told him she hated him that day.  His chest tightened strangely just thinking about it.  But then she showed up at his apartment to apologize, bringing the leftovers of the last dinner she had made for him. 

            At completely the wrong time.

            Sousuke collapsed onto the nearest chair, and drummed his fingers on the desk.  "It's just dinner and a place to sleep.  She is not a tempta--" 

The radio signaled an outgoing phone call from Kaname's apartment.  He squared his shoulders and turned away. 

"I don't need to know."



            "Kaname!  How is Sousuke?"

            Her voice dropped to almost a whisper.  "He's all right. I guess..."

            "What's wrong? You seem a little down."

            "I...Nothing.  I just called to see how you were."

            The other woman let out an impatient breath.  "Kaname, you know you can tell me.  If there's something I can help you with, well, I've known Sousuke for a while.  He's a good guy, and he likes you."

            "I care about him."

            "I know."

            "A lot."

            Melissa chuckled a bit.  "Hm, yes, I've known that for a while. But have you told him?"

            "No." Her voice was airy as she exhaled the short syllable.


            "But I want to!" The girl cried.   "Especially since he'll be returning to Mithril, and I probably won't see him for a while. I wanted to tell him, and..."


            "Well," Kaname sighed.  "You know, do something special before he leaves."

            "Ohhhh," Melissa said, sounding like she finally understood something important.

            "I offered to make him dinner tomorrow night."

            "Dinner or dessert?"  The older woman's voice was teasing.

            Kaname hesitated.  "Well...dinner, but I want to, um, make dessert, but I don't know if he'll want dessert, and I especially don't know exactly how to offer...dessert."

            "It's okay.  I'm almost positive that he's, well, never had dessert anywhere else."


            "So, Kaname, you're going to have to be the one to take charge."

            "I, uh, haven't made dessert before."

            "I figured as much.  But you don't have anything to worry about," Melissa assured her.  "Unless he's crazier than I thought, he's not exactly going to turn you down."

            "Well, but I want to know that he feels the same way about me.  I don't want to just...seduce him."

            Sousuke dropped the headset.  Seduce?


            He returned to pacing back and forth across the room.  He was not prepared to be seduced.  Not prepared at all.  Why would Kaname want to....

"Don't question your good luck."  He could practically hear Kurz say in a far away voice.  "Sousuke, she's beautiful and has a great body.  If you're not up for it, I'll gladly take your--" A distant crash sounded, and Sousuke shook his head.  When had he gotten an imagination?  It was like they were—

"Sousuke!  Do you read me? Sousuke!"  Melissa's voice cut into his thoughts.

Sousuke glanced down at where the headset lay on the floor.  He picked it up and placed it back over his head.  "I copy, over."

"You sly dog.  You were listening all along, weren't you?"

He swallowed hard. Caught. "No.  Listening to what?"

"Ah ah....  I figured you wouldn't have removed the wire taps yet."

Kurz's voice crackled over the connection.  "See, Sousuke, I told you you'd need those condoms. Ow! Sis! Hey!"

"Idiot.  Shut up."

"I don't understand."  The youngest sergeant stammered into the microphone.  A sharp whine pierced the headset and a man's voice barked into his ear.  Sousuke held the thing at arm's length and could still hear him.

"Oh, geez.  What is there to understand about sleeping with a beautiful girl?  You're hopeless!"

"Kurz, get out of here, so help me God"

Sousuke scowled at the electronic device.   

"Sousuke."  Melissa was talking to him again.  "Sousuke, I know you care about Kaname."

He felt a strange warmth flood his face, but kept silent, intently listening to the woman on the line. 

Kurz cut in.  Again.  "Maybe you should--"

"I told you to shut up!  Sousuke...."

"I'm here.  No.  I understand.  It's an important mission."

Melissa groaned.  "NO NO NO NO!  Girls do not want to have love compared to a mission!"

Sousuke blinked.  "Love?"

"Oh geez." Kurz whined.  "Why didn't I get to go retrieve the equipment from the apartment?"

"Major assigned the mission to me."

"For a reason, Sousuke," Melissa said.  "The Major wanted to give you an opportunity to spend time with Kaname before going on your next assignment."

"Major did?"

"Yes! Now listen to me, and Kurz if you try to touch me there one more time, you'll be sucking dinner out of a straw for the rest of your life!"

"All right, all right.  What's your problem today, Sis?"

"Sargeant Sagara listen up."

Sousuke clicked his heels together and stood at attention in front of the desk.  "Yes."

"I'm ordering you to spend this evening considering how you feel about Kaname Chidori.  For you to complete this mission, I'll upload some appropriate content to the encrypted ftp site, password alpha zero zero foxtrot mary paul one.  Peruse it--"

Kurz laughed.  "Oy, sis, you're sending him porn videos?"

"And report in to Kaname tomorrow evening."


"After that, just relax, Sousuke."

The sergeant nodded.  "Relax. Got it."

"Then report to Danaan at 0900 Monday."


"Oh and bring the camera from the--"  A loud crack split Sousuke's ear, and he had to pull the headset away again.  There was a crash, yelling, then the sound of gunshots.  The Mithirl agent sighed.  He just would never understand those two.


"Yes." He shoved the headset back in place.

"Make that 0930 Monday. And bring flowers." Melissa instructed.


"Yes.  For Weber's grave."


AN: That was the warm up.  Up next in chapter 2, how does that worrisome Mithril sergeant feel about Kaname?  Will she have to use the paper fan in order to get him into bed?  Will Sousuke like it?

Sousuke: O_O;;

Kaname: *whacks Sousuke with paper fan* HENTAI!

Sousuke: X_X

Tune in next time for the 'main course' (lemon not appearing until chapter 3).  Thanks for reading!!!