What Dreams May Come
By Daimyo Shi
I don't own Love Hina. I wish I had Keitaro's luck
-------------------- change of place
'Internal dialogue with parts of a personality.'
Kitsune passes the body of Keitaro laying on the ground at the end of the stairs. Keitaro lifts his head and asks "Who was that mad man?"
Kitsune replies "He is Daimyo Shi, and apparently he is in love with Motoko so I suggest you might want to chase someone else. Oh and don't try me because all the money in the world can't make me like you."
"I see, The Gaijin is called Lord of Death? Kitsune-san could you call me an ambulance?" ask Keitaro
'Ok you are an ambulance.' chuckles Kitsune's evil side.
'Kuso, that was not nice' says Kitsune to her evil side.
"Ok, I will." Kitsune walks over to a nearby phone and calls 119 (5). After waiting for the ambulance to arrive and place Keitaro into it, Kitsune continues on to the liquor store. After walking down the street for a bit, Kitsune kicks a bag and finds that it doesn't feel empty. Curious Kitsune picks up and opens the back. In side is a large stack of 10000 yen bills.
'Jackpot! money, money, money! I am in the money!' sings Kitsune's evil side.
'Hush.' says Kitsune as she counts the money she finishes counting 'By the all the Kami and the Buddha, there is 16,950,000 yen (6) here!'
'Oh think what we can buy with that kind of money!' says Kitsune's evil side.
'Hey this much money must belong to someone. We should return it.' says Kitsune.
'What are we supposed to say "Hey who ever is dumb enough to lose 16,950,000 yen please contact me." it is not going to work.' says Kitsune's evil side.
Kitsune had to see the logic in that 'ok we go put it into the bank.'
'What? I thought we were going to spend it.' says Evil Kitsune.
'We can't spend it today, we are out for the party's liquor and nothing else.' says Kitsune as she continues to walk to the bank. Kitsune goes into the bank and depots most of the money. The she locks 10,000,000 into a high interest account.
'Now off to the liquor store.' says Kitsune to her evil self. Kitsune walks to the liquor store and begins to look over al the bottles. Move to the vintages section, "Don Perignon 1982, now that Motoko's birth year I think it be fitting for her to drink Champaign as old as she is." says Kitsune as she picks up two bottles. Kitsune continues to walk around. 'Doesn't Daimyo Shi like Scotch (7)?' asks Kitsune.
'Of course he does.' says Kitsune's evil Side
'here some 15 year old scotch' says Kitsune picking up the bottle of scotch.
Naru, Keitaro and Mutsumi were sitting around Naru's table studying or more accurately attempting to study as each is trying to ignore the comments of their evil sides.
Keitaro's evil side had drool marks on his shirt from his drooling at Mutsumi. 'Come on Keitaro I know she is hot for you. Come on give in and let's go for it.'
'Please I love Naru! Fucken get use to it, besides Mutsumi and I are just friends. You are reading too much into our relationship' says Keitaro to his dark side.
'We should just tackle him now.' says Mutsumi's dark side.
'Naru would get mad.'says Mutsumi to her evil side. 'She would hit Keitaro and send him to low earth orbit.'
'Come now we could stop her. Maybe if we shared Keitaro, Naru wouldn't mind so much.' says Mutsumi.
'If I get my Keitaro, I not sharing with anyone!' Says Mutsumi to her dark side.
On the other side of the table sat Naru trying to study as her own dark side dressed in a female version of a Black military dress uniform made largely of leather and tailored to hug a woman's figure badgers. 'Come on let Keitaro have some fun. He never meant any harm. You are woman you have needs. Seta has too many problems. Do you really want to be Step mom to Sarah? I don't think so. Come on I know he is all hot for you. I can tell by the way he gets a flustered when he talks to you. You know you can't tell me you don't sometimes enjoy his pawing of you.'
'He is hentai!' says Naru to her evil side.
'So that means he is interesting, come on do you really want to lose you virginity to some guy who doesn't like sex? Sounds stupid to me!' says Naru's Evil side. "I mean you want to enjoy it don't you?"
'Well . . . I suppose.' says Naru as she tries to focus back on here history question.
"Does anyone remember when the battle of Hasting was?" asks Naru.
"December of 1066, I Think Naru." says Mutsumi.
"How do you remember that Mutsumi?" asks Keitaro.
"Oh, history is my favourite subject." says Mutsumi.
'Remember that History of Sex book? Now that was a cool book or how about that display we went of Tokugawa Erotic Art that we when to. I wonder if Keitaro is that big.' says Mutsumi's evil side.
Mutsumi chuckles at her evil side. Both Keitaro and Naru look at here.
"What is so funny?" asks Naru.
"Oh, nothing just something I remembered from television. Last night they ran Monty python and the Holy Grail on the all English station. I was just remember the castle Anthrax bit."
"I never seen it." Says Keitaro.
"Nor have I, is it really funny." says Naru.
"Well yes but you English has to be pretty good also it a movie from Britain not the US so it a little weird."
'Does this mean you like Keitaro tie you up and spank you (8).' asks Mutsumi's evil side.
'Well I suppose but only if he promised to take me afterwards.' says Mutsumi to her evil side.
'I wonder what kind of things that Mutsumi would like you to do to her?' says Keitaro's evil side.
'We are just friends I doubt she ever though of me in that light.' says Keitaro.
'I bet she like you to rip her clothes of and take her.' says Keitaro's evil side.
'Hey you know we could share Keitaro with Mutsumi if you like. I mean it would make it more interesting.' says Naru's evil side.
'I don't suppose you are going to stop are you?' says Naru to her evil side.
'Of course not it is my job to annoy you until you recognized what in you heart.' says Naru's evil side.
'What you talking about has nothing to do with love.' says Naru.
'Are you sure? I am a part of you not a separate person. Do you really think my opinions are not part of you? Deep down you do care for Keitaro. Under all that shielding is a woman in love with a man called Keitaro. You can't fool me even if you managed to fool yourself.'
'Hey there is Haitani.' points out Kitsune's evil side. Haitani is cross the street with a plastic bag with some Manga in it. He hasn't seen Kitsune yet. 'I bet he could feed our need.'
'Hah! He'd pass out before he finished taking our clothes off.' says Kitsune.
'We won't know until we try. He is coming to the party isn't he?' says Kitsune's evil side.
'Hai, he is, I not sure how he got invited since his side kick didn't, but then again Shinobu was in charge of the invitations.' says Kitsune.
'I think Shinobu caught what his face checking her out, and was a little scared of him.' says Kitsune's evil side.
'Well that would make sense.' says Kitsune to her evil side.
Kitsune walks out the street without Haitani seeing her. She continues on her way back to Hinata Sou. She walks in side the room and then to the kitchen. Shinobu is just working on the beginning of the meal.
"Hey Shinobu, How come you didn't invite Haitani pal to Motoko's party?" asks Kitsune
'So are you going to tell the truth Shinobu, or will you given and tell a lie.' says Shinobu's evil side with a smile.
'Kuso, I have to lie!' says Shinobu
"Uh, well I don't like him . . . He is scary." says Shinobu.
"Oh, I guess you notice last time he was checking you out." says Kitsune. "Oh well you got space for the liquor in the fridge?" asks Kitsune.
'That bastard, he is like fives year older than me.' thinks Shinobu as she tries not to show her anger.
'Isn't Keitaro like six years older than you?' says Shinobu's evil Side.
'That is different Keitaro-Senpai is not a hentai.' says Shinobu to her evil side.
"Yes there is room but just enough, the fridge is kind of full." says Shinobu
'Speaking of which, Haitani still owes you half of that 10000 yen.' says Shinobu's dark side.
'He is bring it today, actually I had him buy me a bunch of Manga with it.' says Shinobu.
'Oh really like?'
'Bastard, Excel Saga and a couple others that it easier for a guy to buy than a girl.' replies Shinobu.
Kitsune puts the liquor in the Fridge and then heads off to wrap Motoko's present.
(5) If I remember correctly this was the number for "911" is in Japan.
(6) 16,950,000 yen is about 154,725 US Dollars
(7) I love scotch! If you cared.
(8) In the Castle Anthrax bit this is the punishment for setting alight the Grail shaped beacon. If you have seen Monty Python and the Holy grail you remember the scene with all the girls in it. If not a British comic delight awaits you.
Senpai roughly means senior as student very common in Japan. In Ranma ½ it used often with Takiwaki Kuno which is why in the dub he called Upper class man Kuno. Shinobu often uses it with Keitaro, while it is true it also is seen as being a hint that Shinobu is fond of Keitaro since Keitaro often calls Naru by her last name with a similar romantic intent.
-chan, honorific means small or little often used between parents and children, sometime between friends can be use between lovers too. Most often used for girls.
-kun, Sort of a male version of Chan but more masculine often used between friends and older people to boys that they know. Kei-kun is a favourite of Mutsumi for Keitaro.
San is Mister or Miss, a polite way to address an inferior or an equal. Note that both this and sama are used with a family name which in Japan come first
Onii-san means big brother
Hentai means Pervert as anyone that watched Subbed Ranma ½ knows
Gi a martial art top sort of a tunic length kimono or Yukata
Yukata a robe worn in the mostly summer time. Often made of cotton and considered less formal than Kimono. What westerns call Kimono is much more often like a Yukata than a true Kimono.
Battousai I have been told means be header, it is established Nickname of Himura Kenshin. It also the nickname of my dark side.
Hakama is a pleated divided skirt that keeps a man from tripping on his Kimono tails, part of the Garb of the Samurai.
Katana A Japanese long Sword that has a slightly curved blade, between 80cm and 90cm in Blade length. The sword and soul of a samurai.
Wakazashi A Japanese short Sword that also has a Slightly Curved blade, between 60 and 70 cm. A secondary sword for Samurai.
obi is a belt for a kimono.