May 5th, Year 1039 of the Shinobi Era

'AH! AH! AH! AH! AH!' I kept screaming in my head. I was extremely confused….and terrified.

"It's a boy!" I vaguely heard. I would've paid more attention if all my senses weren't so fucked up. It was too bright, too cold, too hot, too loud and too much of everything. I felt weak, and heavy, and vulnerable. God I'm so lost.

"You're a loud one, aren't you?" a feminine voice cooed. Yeah, no shit, I feel vulnerable, scared and small, and I have no idea what the fuck is going on. Excuse my wailing. Bitch.

"L-Let me hold him. I-I want to s-see him." Someone else said. Another feminine voice, but it sounded weak and tired. I felt my body shift, and if the change in motion around me was correct, I was just handed over to my new birth mother.

"Here, Rechin. Our little boy." Oh ok, new birth father, then mother. I felt my body shift again, to who I presumed was my mother. I wasn't looking at her right now because my eyes were incredibly sensitive to the light for some reason. Even shut, they stung.

"Hello, there, my beautiful baby. I'm your mama. And this here," felt my body shift again, which was starting to get annoying "is your papa. Say hello."

For a second, I thought this bitch was asking me to say hello, but then my father spoke.

"H-Hello, my son. I-I am your Otōsan." I just barely popped an eye open, because I had somehow had only just noticed that everyone was speaking Japanese, and I had somehow understood every word of it. Sounds like bad writing in my opinion.

"Gah!" My father gasped, as if someone had just poked him in the side. "Ho-san! E-Explain this!" My father scooped me up, giving me nausea, and made me face the doctor, completely unprepared for the bright light. I shut them again, not wanting my poor sensitive eyes to face anymore torture.

I heard 'Ho-san' gasp in shock "That…. shouldn't be possible, Uchiha-san."


"What? What's going on? Is there something wrong with our son, Kyōmaku?"

"Rechin….you have to see this for yourself." Again, I was handed over to face my mother, and fearing there was something wrong with me, I opened my eyes to look around, that is until I heard my mother gasp.

"Oh….oh my kami. Kyōmaku, he has, he has…." she was able to speak, probably to shocked at whatever was wrong with me, which was really starting to piss me off.

'Am I ugly or something? The fuck is wrong with me?'

There was silence all around the room, and I was beginning to get uncomfortable. The adrenaline was still pumping through my veins pretty damn hard from my earlier trauma, but it wasn't as strong as it was just before.

"...what will you do now, Uchiha-san?"

Please don't fucking say that name.

"I…. I have to ask of you, Ho-san, to please keep this a secret from the rest of the village." my father finally said, breaking the silence.

"You want me to lie?" said 'Ho-san'. He didn't sound much in favor of the idea.

"Ho-san, please understand. We can't hide this from the clan, especially the elders, but we can't let Konoha know about this." About what though? Stop being so god damn vague already.

"I'm sorry Uchiha-san but, I can not simply lie about an infant awakening the Sharingan-" he was harshly cut off by two loud hushes.

"Danzo-sama can not find out about this. He has eyes and ears at nearly every corner of the village, except the clan compounds. Those eyes of his…. I don't like them. Especially around the Uchiha clan." my mother told the doctor. There was a tense silence, a silence I ignored as I began having an existential crisis. This whole conversation, this situation, my eyes….it's too much. I can't take it.

'This can't be real. The Narutoverse is strictly fictional, not at all real.' I repeated this mantra over and over in my mind, even as I felt a strained connection between my body and my eyes. I was losing cha-no.

"Well then, I suppose, no one has to find about this." said 'Ho-san', though he sounded extremely hesitant, with an underlying hint of fear.

I heard my father sigh in relief. "Thank you, Ho-san." it was still tense, so my mother broke the silence.

"What will we name him? We haven't decided on a name yet." asked my mother as I was handed over and cradled in her arms.

"...I think I have one." said 'Ho-san'. When I heard the name, I couldn't help but snort. Unfortunately, my birth parents took this as a sign that I liked it.

And so, on May 5, Year 39 of the Shinobi Era, Uchiha Kōsai was born. Named after the iris of the eye, more specifically the Sharingan eye.

This should be interesting. And by interesting, I mean absolute hell.

February 10th, Year 1042 of the Shinobi Era

"Come on, Kōsai-kun. Don't you want to see the village?" my mother urged me. I nodded, keeping up my usual poker face.

"Hai, Okāsan." I threw on a coat, not even bothering to zip it up, but refused to accept her attempt to carry me. She huffed, and held out a hand. I grabbed onto it with my own, entangling our hands. We stepped out of the house, and into the cold winter air. I didn't get out often, but it was especially cold this year. The Land of Fire was usually a very warm region, and by this point in time, the weather should be at least sixty-three to seventy degrees by this point. It was around fifty, if not colder. Never was a fan of the cold either.

I ignored some of the cold glares that were sent our way. My mother never bought the 'act' I always put up though.

"Don't pay them any mind." she told me. I nodded.

"I know, Okāsan." she concerned herself to much over me.

Nearly three years. Three years since my birth to this world. It took time for me to adjust, believe me, it really did. Dying, losing everything you know, only to be thrown into a supposed fictional universe into a family of homicidal maniacs who work as soldiers and assassins….that took its toll on my sanity. I lingered on it for a bit, but I knew I'd be miserable for years to come if I continued to, so I tried to put it all behind me. It worked for the most part. The rest will be channeled safely once I enter the academy, which, to be honest, is impossible at this point.

"Kōsai-kun, what have I told you?" my mother chastised. Immediately, I blinked and cut off the connection from my brain to my eyes. Incredible clarity now gone, I said, "Sorry Okāsan."

Yeah so, continuing on from my earlier rambling, remember all that 'I'm so traumatized' shit I was talking about earlier? Yeah, no joke, because it was enough to trigger the Sharingan. Apparently there isn't a chakra requirement for it, though it's still incredibly draining. Some, mostly the clan council and the elders, saw this as me being a prodigal genius. A gift to the clan. Others saw me as a freak, which consisted of the rest of the clan. I didn't blame them, as the requirements for the dōjutsu were a bit extreme, so for me to pop out of the womb with these eyes would obviously make anyone think I was a natural born sociopath.

'Fuck, it's even colder outside the clan compound.' I thought. I had never stepped foot into the village, not until now. Not because I was safe or anything, hell no, rather because my parents didn't want me to grow up isolated. They wanted to open me up to the rest of the village, as I didn't really get along with anybody from the Uchiha clan. Problem was, I wasn't actually my age. So there goes the chances of me having any friends.

"Too cold." I mumbled, though mother heard me.

"Zip up, Kōsai-kun." I did. We walked past several villagers in the early morning. Already, I could spot differences. There was more variety when it came to places to shop at. Things seemed more….urban. In this culture, anyway. It was more diverse here too. I had already gotten used to the fair skinned, dark haired, stoic faces of the Uchiha compound. Outside of it, , there were people with wider eyes (almost Caucasian), big noses, tanned skin, odd colored hair. I could go on and on, but I wouldn't want to bore anybody.

Mother brought me over to a small little store, with tables and benches set up outside. Must not get too much business in the winter.

"Oh, Rechin-san!" exclaimed a fat woman as we entered the business. I tilted my head. Orange hair, amber eyes, fair skinned.

Mother smiled at her. "Chiho-san, it's been awhile. Sorry that I haven't been able to come around more often…."

Chiho waved her off. "Oh, don't fret over it. I know you must've been busy after giving birth. Speaking of which," she leaned down, putting her fists on her hips. To me, she looked like a fucking giant, and had I been my actual age, I would've scurried in between my mother's legs.

My mother nudged me to introduce myself, and so I did. "Hello Chiho-san. I am Uchiha Kōsai. Nice to meet you." I bowed my head, as was customary in Japanese culture.

I heard Chiho coo. "Ooh, he's so cute! And polite, if I may add. Then again, what can I expect from you Uchihas, hm?"

My mother laughed lightly. "Yes well, we can't give Kyomaku all the credit, can we?" The women continued to chat as mother began to shop for some sweets, more for her than me. I wasn't that big a fan of sweet things. Chiho left me with some drawing paper and crayons, even if I preferred a pencil or a brush, though I didn't whine. I simply sat there, contemplating the shit I was about to go through, staring out the window. I don't know for how long I just stared into empty space, probably 10 minutes or more. What snapped me out of it, was the sound of the door opening. I blinked, and my eyes took in the sight of the new customer.

"H-Hello." The child shyly entered the store, wearing a navy blue and orange coat that was too big for him, and an orange scarf. He caught my eye and waved, albeit hesitantly. I waved back, though I felt a little confused. Didn't I know this kid.

'Of course not, I don't have any friends.' I reminded myself. Still, there was a feeling I couldn't shake off as the child walked up to the counter.

"Oi, oi, where are your parents young man?" Chiho asked. The child leaned back. "I don't have any."

Absentmindedly, I picked up a crayon, and began drawing.

"Oh…w-well what are you here for?" Chiho asked the child. I couldn't help but notice that on the back of the child's coat, there was a blurred out emblem sewed to it, though I could make out the coloring. Red and white.

I picked up a different crayon, and began rapidly coloring in the paper.

"It's my birthday. I'm three now, and the baa-chan at the orphanage said I could go buy something for myself." The child threw up a couple of coins on the counter, and pointed towards the most expensive box of dango behind the glass. "I want this one!"

Chiho grimaced. "I'm sorry little boy, but that's not going to cut it…maybe you'd like this one?" She gestured towards a much cheaper, blander looking box of dango. I winced as the boy's expression dropped like pinball.

"O-Okay…" he sounded so crestfallen. Not that I cared. Children were annoying little shits anyway. I turned back to my 'empty' paper, only to find that it wasn't empty. I furrowed my eyebrows. Did I draw this just now? I hadn't even noticed. I hadn't finished coloring it in, but I knew this drawing…this scene…this scene is when…

I heard hand meet counter with a smack, and I turned to see my mother paying up.

"I'm done, I think I'll be taking these boxes of chocolates. Oh, and I'll pay for those dango for the boy." The boy's expression lit up like a Christmas tree, and he looked up at my mother as if she were saint.

"Arigatōgozaimashita!" the boy bowed his head several times, thanking my mother over and over. I looked down at the drawing. Done. I made my way over to them, and coughed. "Okāsan, may we leave?"

"Yes Kōsai-kun, we should get going now." No, I didn't want to leave just yet. I turned towards the boy, and asked "You. What's your name?"

The boy looked taken back by how upfront I was, before introducing himself. "Um, I'm Uchiha Obito! Pleased to meet you!" he held out a hand, though everything he had said and done was done in an awkward fashion, as if he wasn't accustomed to being polite or respectful. I only stared at it, blinking back as a response, not once changing my poker face. Obito awkwardly put his hand away, feeling embarrassed.

"Kōsai-kun…" my mother chatised, though it didn't sound serious. I looked at Chiho, and asked if she would bring me a pair of goggles hanging on top of the shelf. She complied, letting me have them for free, as she was just looking to get rid of them anyway.

"Here." I shoved the pair of orange goggles into Obito's arms. He stumbled, looking stunned. "W-Why are you-"

"Goodbye, Obito-san." I said, not even bothering to look back at him. I can't deal with this right now. We walked out of the store, giving more to an orphan than to ourselves. But not before I heard, "Hey, you're from the Uchiha clan too!"

Little moron. To think he becomes one of the most dangerous men to walk on this planet.



"What's that drawing?" she took it from me, and gasped.

"K-Kōsai-kun….this is….where did you learn to draw like this?" I shrugged, telling her truth.

"Taught myself." Mother frowned, looking at my drawing anxiously. "What is this supposed to be, son?"

My mind flashed back to the boy we had just met a moment earlier. I smirked, and had to stop myself from activating my eyes. That would've just gotten me a trip straight to T&I.

"Hell. It's hell mother."

August 18th, Year 1043 of the Shinobi Era

I feel like shit.

Could you blame me though? Knowing you were about to enter into assasin school for kids, in the middle of a war, during a crucial time period in this story, how could I not feel like anything but utter crap?

And seriously, why are these high collared shirts so popular among this world? They're so weird. And awkward around my neck.

'The Uchiha are seriously bugging out if they expect us to fight with these….at least give me something tighter around my neck.' I thought, tugging on the high collar of my dark teal, short sleeved shirt.

"Kōsai-kun! You are going to be late! Hurry up!" my father called from downstairs.

"Coming Otōsan!" I yelled. I got my dark colored sunglasses, and put them on. I ran downstairs, throwing my satchel over my shoulder.

"I'm ready!" I yelled, my stomach feeling queasy. My father grinned, oblivious to how I actually felt. Probably excited I'd finally start getting into the shinobi business, thinking I was gonna end up as some prodigy in the academy.

"Ready?" he held out his hand. I grabbed onto it, biting into an apple. We left the house, and the Uchiha compound soon after, making our way towards the academy.

I haven't done a lot of experimenting to be honest. Jutsu wise, I mean. The only jutsu I know is the Sharingan, taijutsu, and my shurikenjutsu. I didn't bother asking my father to teach me fire release jutsu. I figured nature transformation techniques were a bit unsafe at my current age. It wasn't that big of an issue, I already knew the hand seals, I just need a basic understanding of chakra control. Then….well, we'll see.


'Damn it, where the fuck are they?'

I was looking for familiar faces, like Kakashi or Anko. We were all in the back of the academy, sitting in chairs whilst listening to Hiruzen give his grand speech about us entering the academy.

"…it is important for you all to know, that we will not be raising children here, but rather shinobi who will one day grow into the leaves of the tree that is Konoha…" will you shut up already, Hiruzen?


"Here you go, Uchiha-san." I took the envelope with the application inside. Me and father finally left the academy, and he began lecturing me on how hard I should try to graduate.

"Now, you already know that once we ship off that application, it will be your responsibility to make yourself into a shinobi, right?"

"Hai, Otōsan."

"You have to stay in tip top shape all the time."

"Hai, Otōsan."

"I'm going to take your training and studying more seriously from now on, okay?"

"Hai, Otōsan."

This kept going on and on as we walked home. Obito had ran past us not a second ago, late to the academy inauguration, but stopped for the briefest of seconds when he saw me. He was still wearing the goggles I'd given him over a year ago.

"And this, is where Tobi's obsession with Rin starts…" I muttered. Rin was the only influential person I've seen in the series, excluding Hiruzen. I think I saw Ibiki too, but it's too hard to tell.

Yeah, sorry if that isn't what you expected. It'll get better as the story progresses, I promise.