Sid stomped up the steps to apartment door 267. It's not a particularly special number, but it's what sergeant goodfellow had scribbled down on a little scrap of paper for him when he'd asked after Inspector Sullivan. The door was a pasty white, the paint chipped in multiple areas, the knob clearly starting to rust, and Sid had no doubt that when it opened, he'd hear the tell-tale creak of a hinge in need of oil. It wasn't a very posh place. Sid found himself thinking that it didn't suit a man like Sullivan. An inspector who wore tie bars and well-fitted three pieces on any regular tuesday.
His knuckle stopped just short of the wood before knocking. Sid felt suddenly nervous. He hadn't thought much about what he would say when he got here... he'd just stormed out of Father Brown's kitchen in a hurry to get to the station. He wasn't really sure where to go from here. If he knocked on the door, Sullivan would answer. But then what?
"It would seem that Inspector Sullivan is leaving us." Father brown, seated at the head of the table, sighed with a certain manner of remorse.
Mrs. McCarthy tsked and served a helping of shepherd's pie onto the father's plate, "I always knew he'd up and leave as soon as you helped him climb to the top. The nerve of some policemen, taking all the credit for the great detective work you do father." She chidded, sliding a portion onto Sid's plate next, "Just like that Inspector Valentine. That man jumped ship as soon as you'd earned him a couple commendations."
Sid had only just processed what the father had said, carelessly tuning out Mrs. McCarthy's crude predictions about the next inspector to grace Kembleford. "He's what?"
"Apparently he's been offered a position in the city. I imagine that after the conspiracy, false murder allegations and attempt on his life- the police felt that they owed him something." The father replied, eyes set on Mrs. McCarthy's pie, steaming from his plate, rather than Sid. As if the topic was second rate to a helping of shepards pie.
"He's leaving?" Sid repeated, feeling a little hard pressed for breath. The center of his chest suddenly hurt. "He didn't say anything."
Father Brown frowned and cocked his head towards Sid, "Yes, well... I imagine he was trying to avoid any heavily hearted goodbyes."
"Not that a man like him would be capable of anything so emotional as a heavy heart." Bridgette jibed, setting her teacup down at her seat.
Something irrational sparked inside of Sid. He tuned out their bickering, jumped up from his seat and was out the door before either of them could so much as call out to him.
Now here he was, frozen still in front of the inspector's fading apartment, hesitating whether or not to knock. What was he even going to say? They didn't have a history- Well... they had a history of sorts. Nothing worth town gossip, but there was definitely something hidden between the pages. Sid had only been waiting for Sullivan to make some kind of move- Just something. but now... Now he supposed he had to be the one to say something. Before he left for good.
Sidney had finally worked up the resolve to knock when the door slowly opened, revealing the predicted long creak of a hinge needing oil.
"Come in." Sullivan said, abandoning the open door and heading right back to the bookcase where a half-packed box sat patiently for him. "I could hear you thundering up those steps."
"You certainly took your time standing there."
Sid couldn't find the words he was looking for. He took a heavy step forward and inhaled sharply. He watched the Inspector scoop books from the shelf into the box and wanted to march right over there and put them right back on that shelf. Sid wanted to make him put all of his things back. Sid wanted him to admit he had a reason to stay, that there were roots he had planted here and he couldn't just decide to go during the night and without any goodbyes.
"You're leaving." was all he said.
"Yes. I've been offered a position-"
"In the city." Sid finished for him. "Father brown told us."
Sullivan jeered, "Yes, of course. He knows everything after all." He smirked over his shoulder, "Did you come to congratulate me?"
Sullivan paused, the smile falling off his face as he straightened himself to look at Sid, "No?"
"I mean yeah, of course, but- No. No you didn't tell no one you was leavin'!" Sid spat, a sudden upset rising from his belly.
"I only just found out about it myself yesterday." he replied, "They called during my lunch."
"An you just... came back here to pack? Were you gonna say anythin'?"
Sullivan opened his mouth to speak but shut it before uttering a word. He turned his attention back to the bookshelf, "I don't owe Father Brown any sodden farewells."
"I'm not askin' about Father Brown. I'm askin' cus- Well-" Sid spoke with a passion that condemned him. There was so much he didn't know how to convey. It frustrated him, made him feel irrational. Sullivan wasn't even looking at him for God's sake... Angrily, Sid spun the inspector around by his shoulders, fingers digging desperately into his arms, "It wasn' just me who noticed it right?"
At Sullivan's confused frown he continued, "I mean, I'm not..like that or anythin'. I don't usually fancy blokes but... but I know what I felt. The bloody... looks back and forth. And when you helped me out of a jam-More than once I might add! I mean I didn't imagine you slipping me a little extra helpin' that night I spent inna cell or-or when you helped me fix the car or when you straightened by bloody uniform in front of Lady M.! God, I mean... I've seen you checking out my arse!"
"Carter, stop it."
Sid glared, "I did not just imagine all that."
Sullivan pulled Sid's hands away from his arms, his shirt rumpled where Sid's fingers had clinged so tightly. He scoffed, "What exactly are you asking me Mr. Carter?"
Sid stood gobsmacked, "I dunno! Somethin'!"
"Something illegal?" Sullivan barked, taking a menacing step towards Sid as he took a startled step back, "Are you asking a police officer to set aside the law for- for what? A night of floundering around with our dicks out? Is that what you were expecting?"
Sid's legs came flush with the coffee table and he tensed. One more step and they'd be chest to chest. He saw the hurt, frustrated anger in Sullivan's eyes, fear lacing the edges. He didn't know what he had been expecting. He had no idea why he'd rushed over so suddenly after hearing the news, "I- I didn' mean-"
Sullivan gave his chest a firm push and Sid went tumbling over, back colliding with the coffee table, legs flailing for a second before Sullivan slipped between them, slamming his hands down on either side of the chauffeur's head. "What was your plan? Did you come here just to get under my skin?"
"What?! No!" Sid stuttered just a little. Sullivan was between his legs, hovering over him and extruding an aura of fierceness Sid had never experienced before. His heart was hammering and he could feel the beat thundering in his head as the inspector leaned just an inch closer.
"Were you expecting me to fuck you Mr. Carter?"
"Oh Jesus..." Sid muttered, shutting his eyes and praying this wasn't just the wettest dream he'd ever had.
"Father Brown wouldn't approve." Sullivan breathed, eyes falling to Sid's mouth in what seemed to be an unconscious movement.
He licked his lips, "Father Brown doesn't judge."
"He will after what I'm about to do to you."
Sid gulped down a lungful of air he didn't realize he'd been gasping for, "I won't tell if you won't."
"You don't have to tell." Sullivan scoffed, returning his heated gaze to Sid's eyes, "He always knows."
Sid mustered up enough courage to attempt a grin before wrapping his legs around the inspector's waist and sliding his arms up around his neck, "We... better make it worth it then, hadn't we?"
"I'm not a gentle man Carter."
Sid smiled, "Wouldn't expect anythin' less from a copper. Especially not after your rough pat downs inspector."
Sullivan shot him a genuine smile that caught Sid off guard. The inspector's cheer changed to smugness before he dipped his head to Sid's. The first smash of lips was hard. Sid thought he might have bust the inside of his lip, but good lord was it worth it. Sullivan was so demanding when he kissed, unlike any other first kiss he'd shared, always so timid and unsure. Sid loved that they'd jumped right into the ferocity, unleashing all the pent-up tension they'd been carrying around for far too long.
Sullivan set to work impatiently rucking up his shirt and hastily fiddling with the buttons of his trousers. Sid groaned, already feeling more heated than he ever remembered being in the company of a dame. Of course, picking up ladies at the bar was quite different from lying beneath Sullivan... and cradling the soft curves of a woman was nothing compared to being held down by the rough, working hands of a man.
A button from Sid's shirt popped off and rattled noisily against the coffee table's surface as Sullivan tore at his clothing. Sid was already mostly naked, his shirt barely together anymore, hanging in loose shambles, the fly of his pants open and the fabric now slipping down well below his waistline.
Sidney, however, was having a much harder time getting the inspector unclothed. "How the hell do you get this bloody thing off?!" She finally demanded, anxiously tugging at back of his vest.
Sullivan pulled back, shedding both his vest and shirt before driving forward again to mouth at Sid's collar. "Are you always this demanding?"
"Only when I know I can get my way." Sid grinned, letting his fingers tangle in the refreshingly short hair of another man.
A lot of things were different now, doing it with a bloke. Good and bad. The intense taboo of the situation made him restless and excited. Never one for following the norm, Sidney was loving this sinful diversion from the path most taken. It was rough and satisfying compared to the way he always needed to be soft and gentle with women. There was nothing held back for the sake of niceties. Though... on the flip side, Sid always knew where he stood with women. He wasn't sure who was supposed to be... doing who here... but from the way the inspector was pinning him down and taking charge, Sid felt he should prepare for a sore walk home. God something was gonna be in his arse. (Sorry again father for the swearing)
He should probably feel bad about it, maybe even disgusted, but all Sid could feel was pleasure. New, exciting pleasure. "You're gonna ruin me for dames." he finally gasped when the inspector had Sid's pants down to his knees and his own fly open, holding the both of them in one hand and he moved.
"Good." Sullivan grunted, taking the opportunity to bite down on the strip of neck he'd been mouthing at.
Sid tried to hold back the sound of his voice, suddenly thinking that maybe he should be embarrassed about it. It felt so good... good to let go. "You know-" his breath left him when Sullivan jerked forward, grinding against him, "I'm not usually into the.. unh possessive type."
"Be quiet." Sullivan nipped, deciding to shove a couple fingers into Sid's mouth for good measure.
That was new too. Though of course they'd need some kind of lubricant here... That small pinprick of fear spurred him into action, sucking like his life depended on it. He was rewarded with a surprised groan from the inspector, only encouraging him further. If he had to do it he might as well excel.
Sid chuckled, shoving Sullivan's fingers from him mouth with his tongue, "Father wouldn't approve of that."
Sullivan's freed fingers found their way lower, pressing in with an impatient insistence that Sid wasn't sure how to react to. Though honestly, with time to think about it he might have backed out. He was glad he didn't have the spare moment to contemplate on it.
"It'll feel better in a moment." The inspector promised, his touch suddenly becoming just a bit gentler.
He kissed Sid's forehead once before returning to the now sensitive patch of bitten neck. Sid felt overwhelmed. Between the teeth at his collar and the hands below his waist his body was on fire, alive with want. He curled his fingers in the Inspector's hair, daring to give it a small tug and receiving a pleased grunt for his efforts. Sid wanted more. He pulled harder, forcing Sullivan away from his neck and towards his mouth. Sid kissed him with a passion he hadn't felt before, grinding down on the man's fingers unabashedly, mind only occupied with the next moment and the next sensation. In that moment, Sid was certain he'd agree to anything Sullivan asked of him without hesitation.
"Do it now." he ordered, dragging Sullivan away by his hair again.
"You sure you're up for it?"
"Yes! Now bloody do it before I change my mind!"
Sullivan was hasty and rough in settling himself between Sidney's thighs, but gentled moving forward from that. As if the inspector wanted to treat him like something delicate and precious, no matter his insisting that he was fine. "Hold on there." Sid grunted, clenching his fists at his sides.
It hurt. No mistaking that. But Sid knew that if they stopped now this would never happen again. The spell would break and Sullivan would no doubt send him away, tell him to rest, then be gone in the morning. If Sid backed out then it was over. Instead he clenched a tighter fist, willing to breathe through the first rough patch of it. It was supposed to feel better soon. His old barmate had sworn (in confidence) that after a while you could see stars. With that promise in mind and Sullivan's patience, Sid found the strength to relax just a little.
Sullivan leaned into him prematurely, shoving himself in another inch before Sid shouted, "Whoa boy! Hold up there!"
"Sorry-" Sullivan blundered, "Sorry. I'll wait."
Obediently, the inspector kept himself still. His hands, planted on either side of Sid's head, slid down, bringing elbow to table so that his arms bracketed Sid's face. One hand wiped wet strands of hair away from the mechanic's eyes as the other cupped his cheek, "It'll feel better once you relax and I start moving."
"I just need a minute-" Sid grunted, giving into whim and wrapping his arms around Sullivan, clinging to his back as he tried his best to breathe evenly.
Sullivan grinned, "Aren't you supposed to be a tough guy?"
"You've got your bloody cock up my arse." Sid barked, affronted. "It hurts."
The inspector snickered, "I thought you could take anything I could dish out?"
Sid scoffed defiantly, taking the bait and raising his long legs to lock his ankles around the inspector. He sharply clamped down on a patch of hair and pulled Sullivan's face closer to his own with more confidence than he really felt, "Alright then." he jeered, "Bring it on."
Sullivan withdrew slowly and entered again with an equally snail-like pace, not exactly rising to Sid's challenge, but at least pretending to. Sid was grateful for it, even if he wouldn't admit it. He spent the first few thrusts adjusting to the movement and trying to focus on where pleasure could be taken from it. It was weird... truly. Though not unpleasant. The earlier pain was fading fast and Sid almost thought it might be okay for him to edge Sullivan on further.
"You're half assing it." Sid taunted, and took the inspector's earlobe between his teeth with a sharp bite as if to make his point.
At that, Sullivan started to pick up his pace, grateful Sid had finally settled down enough to tease. With the tension in his body slowly releasing and Sid's voice no longer stifled by his pride, Sullivan felt more at ease being rough. He hiked one of Sidney's leg up to his shoulder with force, delighting in the surprised gasp and pleased groan he was rewarded with. He'd make Carter squirm like this. Sullivan wanted to see the contrast between Sid's tough-guy act and what he looked like when his guard was well and truly down. He wanted to watch Sid come undone and open, spread out right before his eyes, no longer a bundle of unpredictable trouble just out of his reach. He felt a sinful rush of power wash over him when Sid let out his first squeal.
It was starting to feel good. So good. Sid held on tighter, biting his cheek to keep from letting out any more embarrassing sounds. He could tell when Sullivan thrust harder and slipped a hand around his neck that he didn't want Sid to be quiet. He didn't apply any pressure to his throat, but the effect alone encourages Sid to let his mouth drop open again, allowing himself to moan aloud as Sulivan thrust again.
"I'm bloody definitely ruined for dames now-" Sid gasped, tossing his head back and holding on desperately to Sullivan's bicep. "Oh God!"
"Perfect." Sullivan smiled, leaning forward to capture Sid's lips in a desperate kiss. Everytime their kiss broke, he repeated himself over and over, the words like a prayer on his lips, "Perfect, perfect, perfect."
Sid gave in and put a hand on himself, trying his best to move in rhythm with Sullivan's hips, grunting and groaning with every movement. It felt so good. Why hadn't they been doing this from the beginning again? Why was he worrying so much? If he could be with Sullivan like this what was there to worry about? He let out a warning whine seconds before he came, making a mess between them as Sullivan pounded, his tempo unmoved, but his eyes glued to the sight.
It wasn't long after that before Sullivan followed suit.
He stayed there, breathing heavily over Sid, their chests heaving and their eyes trained carefully on one another, unsure where to go from here.
Hesitantly, Sullivan moved his hand, letting his fingers gently cup Sidney's cheek, attempting to gauge how he was feeling. Instead of returned timidness, Sidney hummed, content, pressed his cheek into the inspector's palm and let his eyes shut. Sullivan let out a relieved breath of air, letting his forehead fall until he bumped against Sid's.
"Ya know..." Sid huffed, "I've got feelings for ya, right?"
"I assumed." Sullivan smirked, a little stunned they were actually going to have this conversation now.
"And..." Sid continued shakily, "I kinda want... you know... more?"
"Sid." he interrupted, watching Sullivan's careful gaze, "Everybody calls me Sid."
"Sidney," he tried again, "I'm leaving kembleford-"
"I could come visit ya. Or you could come back here once in a while, ya know? I'm sure everybody would like to see you again."
The inspector sighed, "I... I'm still a police officer, Sidney. I can't just-"
"Don't make this a one off." Sid pleaded, "I want to..."
"To what? Be with me?"
Sid frowned, shifting from Sullivan's eyes to his mouth, "Yes."
Sullivan couldn't breathe. What was he supposed to do? Drop everything? It was illegal... They couldn't... "Father Brown would-"
"He doesn't give a hoot. He doesn't judge and he wouldn't think any less of us."
"There isn't an us, Sid-"
"There could be." Sid tried, raising his own hand to cover the one Sullivan had on his cheek.
He closed his eyes and for a moment, Sullivan imagined what it might be like to be with a man like Sid carter. There were so many reasons to say no, but when he thought about Sid sitting on his couch, feet up and waiting for Sullivan to come home after a long day of work... sharing a whiskey and talking about his day. He thought about the secret smiles Sid liked to send him when they were out in public. Those beautifully sweet little smiles that left Sullivan's entire day brighter. He didn't know how to say no. Instead he sat up, bending over to scoop up Sid's trousers before handing them back.
"Go home." he said, tired, "I'll see you tomorrow."
Sid didn't say anything as he left, a decision he regretted when he came again the next day and Sullivan was already gone.