A/N

So this is a completely different spin on the show, some things following plot, some being my own story. Not really set anywhere specific, it's just a story I have been playing with for over a year or so and have never published anything more for the fact that I was scared and worried about the harsh criticism. But, I let one of my friends read some of it and told me I should publish it for the shits and giggles of it so here I am! lol It doesn't follow the "strict" SOA rules, but I'm working with it

The first chapter is going to be a pretty long one only because I wanted to get a lot of the back story in there, but none the less, I'm pretty happy with it so far and I hope you enjoy my wacky story lol

I do not own SOA, only my OC characters (The picture, though chopped off, represents some of my OC characters to give you an idea of who I am showing as them lol)

(Here we go)

The thought of me being here right now, in this situation, makes my blood boil. Thinking how I could have avoided this all. My thoughts are consuming me as I rev my Harley to go faster, driving down the interstate towards Charming. It had been a long 3 days of driving, going through Wyoming through Utah, Nevada and now California. It had never been my plan, you know, abandoning my club and taking off to another club.

I had become the first female president of a SONS chapter. I felt so proud, so accomplished, I felt like I was one of them and not some old' lady or croweater. I was also one of the first female patched members of a SONS chapter as well. My dad, Paul Kerr, was the President of the SAMCCO. He was so well liked amongst everyone, not just our club but other SONS clubs around. My dad swore that he would never allow me to get into any club business, ride a motorcycle, anything that had to do with the Reaper. I begged my brother to teach me how to ride a motorcycle because growing up around the club, I always wanted to be just like them. I was riding dirt bikes at the age of 12 and riding my first Harley on my 17th birthday. Reminiscing of the memory, I look down at my Dyna and patted her. If there was anything good in my life, it was this beast between my legs.

*FLASHBACK*

Once I was 18, I secretly had my mom make me my own patch and wore it around so I could feel like them. I would walk around town; people would look at me strangely because of the patch that was on my back. It seriously was one of the best feelings ever, feeling like I was important. Unfortunately, my dad caught wind of what I was doing and was dragged into the club practically by my hair.

"What the fuck are you doing? And what is that on your back?" I heard my dad yell at me as he slammed the door of the room with the table that had the reaper on it. My brother was already in there with one of the guys. I took a deep breath and sighed.

"Daddy, I just want to be like you, like Brendon, like everyone here. I love being round you guys, I feel like I'm practically already a member." I sat in my dad's chair at the head of the table as he ran his hand through his hair, looking at my brother who could only shrug.

"This is your fault." my dad said, pointing at Brendon. All Brendon could do was laugh.

"I had nothing to do with this. It's in her blood dad. It always has been." Brendon sat down in the chair off to the side of me. I was fiddling with the gavel my father had used, trying to avoid any eye contact. I looked up to see my dad leaning on the table staring at me. I couldn't tell if he was mad, sad, or what.

"I know it's in her blood. It's in your blood too, son." he looks at Brendon then back at me. "But she's my princess. I could never forgive myself if anything happened because she was part of this club." I slam the gavel down as I stand up, leaning on the table looking back at him.

"I have been as part of this club as he has. I have always been there to bail you guys out when you needed it, stitch some of the guys up, even clean up after you slobs. I know the ins and outs of this club, what you do, finances, etc. Just because I am a girl, doesn't give me the right to be part of this club like you two are. If I have to prospect, I will, but I want to be part of this." I sit back down and lean in the big chair, never looking away from my father. He closed his eyes, took a deep breath, and sat in the chair across the table from me.

"Paige, there has never been a female patch member in SONS and I plan to keep it that way. The shit that we do can be really tough and intense. I don't want you getting involved in it, let alone having something happens to you because of it." I rested my elbows on the table and put my hands up to my lips. It seemed like I wasn't budging, but I didn't give up.

"Why don't you put it to a vote then? You can't make a decision like this without the consult of the hierarchy and club." I look over at Brendon who has just been looking at me and dad.

"She does have a point, dad. I mean, she's one tough cookie and has done a lot for the club and she knows how to shoot. Plus, any new members, male or female, has to be put to a vote." Brendon stood up and went and called for everyone. "HEY! Everyone in the chapel! We need to make a vote." he yelled through the clubhouse. I stood up and walked to the corner of the room while everyone piled in. I could see the worry in my dad's face when he walked to his place at the table. Brendon was not far behind as he sat at his spot and the rest followed suit. One of the prospects walked over to me.

"Your dad wants the 'kutte' that you made." he said holding out his hand. I shrugged the cut off and handed it to him, sticking my hands in my hoody pocket. The prospect handed the kutte to my dad who threw it out on the table.

"I have called this meeting because it has been brought to my attention that my daughter would like to be a member of this club." As my dad said this, everyone looked right over at me. All I could do was wave. I knew all of them, pretty well actually. They have been practically my family since my mom died when I was little. "We have never had a female patch member, not in this chapter and no SONS chapter around. I was intending on keep it that way, but rules are rules and we need a majority vote if she were to come a full-fledged patch member" He said grabbing my cut and holding it for everyone to see.

"Aye." I hear my brother say. He looked at my father because the face my father had looks like he had seen a ghost.

"Aye." I hear come from Snoopy, which was the Sargent at Arms. I could see my dad's face get whiter and whiter as we went around the table.

"Aye." came from Derrick. My eyes widened more. Holy shit, was this happening? I thought to myself.

"Aye." Came next from Luke. "Aye." came from Heathen. "Aye." next came from Leaf. I had majority vote. I started walking towards my dad and was stopped dead in my tracks.

"Nay." I hear Shawn say. Everyone looked at him in shock. No matter how many people were looking at him, his eyes never left me. "I agree with you Paul, I don't think it's a good idea. I know my vote doesn't mean shit, but I don't think this is a good idea at all." My dad nodded at Shawn and looked at me.

"Though I do not agree with this, it is a majority decision," he said as he grabbed my new cut. "You wear this with pride, dignity, loyalty and honor. You are now and forever bounded by the reaper." I leaned down and kissed my dad's head and threw on my new cut. "Meeting adjourned!" he said has he slammed the gavel down. I honestly could not believe it. I was the very first female patch member ever. Everyone congratulated me, including my father, even though I could feel he was still not happy about the decision. I saw in the corner of my eye Shawn walking out of the room so I decided to run after him.

"Hey!" I called to him as I saw him putting his helmet on. He turned to me with the most serious face I had ever seen.

"You got something to say?" was all he mustered out. I stood there with my hand on my hip.

"Do you have a problem with me or something? Did I do something wrong?" All he did was smirk.

"It's nothing personal Paige. Your dad made some valid points. I hope you know what you're getting into." then he put his sunglasses on and took off. I turned around and bumped right into Brendon.

"He'll come around, don't worry. This is new for all of us but you will be perfect for the club." he said throwing his arm around my shoulder. I wrapped my arm around his waist and walked back inside to celebrate.

*FLASHBACK END*

I stopped at the gas station to fuel up one more time before my final stretch to Charming. I wiped my eyes from remembering that memory, a memory of what seemed like good time. I was patched in 6 years ago today. The irony seriously killed me. Everything was going fine, the club was booming and we had no problems. My dad's vision was to slowly stop selling guns. Selling guns was killing people near and dear to us, putting others in serious danger. It was good money, but my dad wanted out. Once word got around that Paul Kerr was out, people were not happy at all.

*FLASHBACK*

One crazy night 3 years ago, my brother and I were out riding to grab some information from a couple Mayan guys as far as who was on board of us getting out of the gun game. Everything was a blur from here. A couple trucks came speeding around the corner and about 4 guys hopped out, charging at me and my brother. Brendon shoved me to the ground and the guys started opening fire. After what seemed like eternity, the guys hopped back into the van and sped away. I remember looking around, waiting for the smoke to clear until finally laying my eyes on my brother who was lying on the ground with bullet holes in his body.

"No. No. NO!" I screamed as I knelt down to him. He was cold, lifeless. I checked his pulse and there was nothing. My brother, Brendon Kerr, was dead. I looked over where the Mayans were standing and they were on the phone with someone. I looked back down at my brother and just started crying into his body. I felt a hand on my shoulder and I looked up and saw Suarez, one of the Mayan's kneeling down handing me the phone.

"PAIGE! Are you ok?" I heard my father bellow through the phone. I couldn't get a word out between my uncontrollable sobs.

"Dad, he's gone." was all I could manage out as I handed the phone back to Suarez.

I leaned against my bike after fueling it up. That was one of two of the most painful memories that I have had to go through. I wiped my tears away, through my sunglasses back on and hit the road towards Charming. As I continued to ride, I continued to think about how I got here. I buried my brother a week after that mess. It was hard for the club to bounce back but we needed to. We were a strong family. We went about business like usual until the second major blow came to my family that changed everything.

*FLASHBACK END*

I was made VP after my brother died. Not many people were too thrilled about the choice but my brother always said, "If I die, you are next in line. You will replace me and then lead the club to bigger and better things." So I took his spot. I didn't want it, I didn't think I was ready, but when you're a SON, you never turn anything away. The gun sales had died down and we were finding other means to get money. It was quiet, but it was too quiet. Unfortunately, I was going to find out how quiet it really was.

*FLASHBACK*

Luke and I were getting some paperwork together for one of our side businesses when two of the prospects barreled into the club house. I grabbed Luke's arm because what came next I was not prepared for at all.

"Paige, you need to come with us. Something bad has happened." Rig said. I grabbed my helmet and hopped on the back of his bike. Rig led the whole pack of our club to a warehouse that was located on the outskirts of town. I hopped off the bike and ran towards of the building, swinging the doors open. I saw two cops standing over a body that was completely lifeless. I slowly walked over to see my father laying on the cold ground, multiple stab wounds and a bullet through his head. I dropped to my knees. I couldn't even cry, I couldn't move, I couldn't process what was in front of me.

Rig came down to my level and brought me into his arms. I couldn't even hug him back. I was so numb and shocked at the same time. I saw everyone hugging each other, looking at me.

"Miss Kerr, do you have any idea who would do this to your father?" one of the cops asked me. All I could was shake my head. I had no energy to say anything. The cops nodded back at me and continued looking over the scene. Rig and the rest of the guys led me outside. They all got in a circle around me, making sure I was ok.

"My brother is dead. My dad is dead. Whoever has done this, will pay. I will put my body on the line to find who did this." I said, seeing everyone nod in agreement.

"We need you more than ever, Paige. I know this is a tough time, but we need you as our leader, as our president. There is no vote that is going to be made." Luke said. The other prospect walked toward us from the warehouse, holding my father cut. I walked over to him taking it out of his hands. I took my knife out of my boot and took the president off my father cut, folding it after.

"We are a Family! We are a Unit! And united we will be!" I yelled holding the president piece that I just took off my father's cut in the air. Everyone yelled at the same time in agreement. All except Shawn who had been hidden in the shadows.

*FLASHBACK END*

I finally see the end of my journey coming near when I see the "Welcome to Charming" sign in the distance. I smiled a small smile knowing I'm finally here. After being appointed President, everything seemed to be ok. Burying your father and brother within 2 years of each other was extremely difficult, but taking over the responsibilities of being the President, let alone the first female President.

*FLASHBACK*

Things seemed good until I started hearing voices and rumors circling around the clubhouse, from hang arounds, crow-eaters, then a few times from my own men. It got to the point I just couldn't take it anymore.

"Everyone in the Chapel, now!" I yelled into the clubhouse. Everyone looked at me funny but they didn't disregard an order. Everyone filed in and sat at their respective spots. I had appointed Luke has my VP when becoming president.

"Is everything ok Paige?" Luke asked me worried. I leaned into the table looking down, and then back up at everyone.

"I don't know, is there?" I looked around at everyone. Some of them looked down, others were truly confused. "I walk around the clubhouse, my clubhouse hearing shit about me. People talking behind my back." I sat down, fiddling with the gavel like she had the same day she had been patched in. Then I saw Shawn stand up and cross his arms.

"Paige, we need back in with the guns. Our money is running low and the guns were giving us some good business." I shot him a look of disgust.

"Get back into guns? Are you mad? My brother is dead because of that shit. My father is dead because of that shit. You seriously want to get back into something that has brought more heartache to this club than anything?" Shawn gave me an icy look; I could feel his blue eyes piercing into me.

"The reason they're dead is because we tried to pull out!" he yelled at me. Everyone's eyes widened, including mine. I couldn't believe what I was hearing.

"How fucking dare you! Who the hell do you think you are saying something like that!?" I could start to feel tears form in my eyes.

"You don't realize the shit that has been brought to this club since removing the gun trade. You, your old man and brother were so fucking oblivious to it. You were trying to make things better and all you did was made it worse." My eyes hadn't left his, no expression in either one of us.

"What are you saying then Shawn?" He sits down, looks down and back up at me.

"I'm moving to have you removed as President. I want a vote on it." I couldn't believe what I was hearing. This is what everyone had been talking about. They were talking about my family behind my back, making accusations about the shit that has happened.

"Fine. Let's take a vote then." I said looking around the room. "This is a majority vote, no unanimous vote." I sit down in the chair, the chair that was my father's for years and years. I felt betrayed and upset. Why did it come to this? Why didn't we talk about it instead of this? I sat in silence as I saw the votes being casted. This was it. My demise. A demise that was completely out of my control. I looked over at Luke who was taking the tally. He looked down and back at me.

"6-4, in favor of the removal of Paige Kerr as President." I looked around the table. Some kept their head low; some were looking at me with sadness. I lost my brother, my father, and now my club, my family. I stood up and walked out of the Chapel, ran upstairs and filled my backpack up with belongings that I needed. I reached into my jeans for my cell phone and dialed the only person that would get me. Piney.

"Hey darling! How is everything going over in Colorado?" I sat back onto my bed with my head in my hand, the other one on the receiver.

"Piney, my club turned against me. They want back in with the guns trade and instead of talking to me about it, they talked amongst themselves, to the point they just voted me out." At this point, I can feel myself start to cry. "Piney, I don't know what to do or where to go. You were my dad's best friend; I didn't know who to turn to." I head Piney let out a deep sigh.

"Come to Charming, sweetheart. You know the boys here have always loved you as one of our own. I'll talk to Clay. There shouldn't be a problem. Then we can talk all about it." I sniffled back and agreed.

"I'll be there in a few days. Thank you Uncle Piney. You seriously are my last family. I don't know what I would do without you." I could hear him chuckle.

"You are like the daughter I never had; I will always be here for you until my last dying breath. I'll see you soon."

"You too. Bye." and I hung up the phone, throwing my phone into my pocket. I finished up packing my essentials, and walked downstairs. Everyone that had voted for me to stay was there waiting to see what's happening.

"Paige, are you leaving?" I heard Rig ask. All I could do was nod.

"You can't leave!" I hear Luke yell as he was running up to the group of people. I just shook my head.

"Luke, I cannot stay here any longer. I have just been voted out of my own fucking club, the club my father built with his hands. I love you guys and I'm grateful that you stuck by me, but once I'm voted out as a President, I am officially nomad. I cannot stay here." All of them looked to the ground. I started giving them all hugs goodbye. I took my knife out of my boot and stripped my patch of the "President". "Please take care of this place, make sure no one drags it to the ground. You all have my number; please call me if you ever need anything." I walked to my bike, threw on my helmet and looked back at my last remaining family left. My boys. I blew them a kiss goodbye and took off.

*FLASHBACK END*

Little did I know, that the moment I left, Shawn would be appointed the new president and not Luke. So that leads us to present day, riding my motorcycle, still with my Colorado cut, riding to Teller-Morrow to see my long lost Uncle and hopefully somehow start over with a new family. As I rode past the main street of this small town, everyone looked and smiled as I rode. SAMCRO was so appreciated here; it was a nice warm feeling knowing that this town felt safe with us, with them.

As I round the corner, I see the sign and realized that this is the time. I turn into the entrance and roll up to the line of bikes. I see a bunch of guys just hanging on the picnic tables outside. They looked at me funny, but didn't think anything of it. One of the guys ran inside to probably get Piney or Clay. Once I shut my bike off, I see a tall scruffy figure run up and hug and swing her around. Opie.

"Oh my god sister, you're actually here! I thought my old' man was playing games." Opie said with a smile. He let me down and I gave him a real hug.

"Nope, this time he hasn't gone senile, yet." I say laughing. I look over and see Piney walking out of the clubhouse, oxygen tank and all. I shook my head and ran over to him, giving him the biggest hug. I could feel his arms wrap around me, feeling that he really missed me.

"I am so happy you're here baby girl. You are finally home." I just buried my face into Piney's chest and started crying. He kept his on me until I saw in the corner of my eye two other men walk up behind us. One was an older guy, which had to have been Clay and the other guy was more around my age, slim and tall but had a build to him. I saw his blonde hair and blue eyes. That had to be Jax. He looked so familiar, but I couldn't put my finger on it. I let go of Piney, wiping my tears onto my sleeve and looked up at Clay and Jax.

"So you're the little lady that has been holding down Colorado for some time now." Clay said has he taken a drag of his cigarette. I just looked up at him and nodded. He and Jax smiled at each other.

"Well, Piney told us the gist of what happened, why don't you come to our chapel and we'll discuss what we can do, ok darlin'?" I heard Jax ask. Again, all I did was nod. They started to walk inside their club house and I followed suit. Opie came around and rested his arm around my shoulders. With my 5'4" height, I was easily a foot shorter than him so it made it easy for him.

"Everything will be fine. You have family with us. No matter what happens, you're staying here." he said with a smile. I just leaned into him as we followed Clay and Jax into the clubhouse.

"Everyone in the Chapel!" I heard Clay bellow into the clubhouse. Everyone looked over and followed his voice. Opie and Piney led me into the Chapel, Opie grabbing a chair for me to sit on. I moved it to the corner, so I could have a good look at the table. One by one, everyone entered the room, with the last man closing the door behind him. I sat in the chair and crossed my legs, fiddling with my thumbs. Last time I felt this nervous was when I got voted in as a patched member. I saw all of them light a cigar, the smoke engulfing the room. Oh how I missed this smell I thought to myself.

"I have called this meeting to order because we have a NOMAD that has entered our club, a NOMAD that had no control of her status." everyone started chattering at the mention of the use of "her". Everyone looked around the room and all eyes landed on me. I just stared at them, not saying anything. "Paige Kerr was the president of the Colorado Chapter, which was once, ran by her father, the infamous Paul Kerr." everyone's eyes landed back on me like they had just realized who I was. I just bowed my head to them as Clay had continued. "Now, I've known that there were non-believers of Paige's president skills and her abilities of being a SONS president, but don't underestimate her. She has the mind, body, soul and heart of her father. When she was in command, she did what her father wanted. Paul started trying to get out of the gun trade. It was dragging their club down, like it did with other chapters. Unfortunately, some people cannot remove themselves from the disease." Clay took a deep breath.

"We've been out of it for a few months and it was a rough road, but we've managed to keep ourselves busy without it and we have had no troubles. We can never be out of it completely, but it's mainly smaller organizations instead of dealing with bigger groups." Jax piped up. I continued to watch them debate. I wish my club, my old club, was this cooperative. Jax looked over at me and my heart completely stopped. He smiled at me and reached his arm out wanting me to walk over. Like an obedient dog, I stood up and walked over. He wrapped his arm around my waist as he stayed sitting.

"Paige, you were an amazing leader. Your views were views of your father. I know despite what happened your father and your brother are looking down on you, proud of what you accomplished with that club on your own. I am sorry, on behalf of SONS president's around what happened to you. Word has gotten around and majority is on your side, the majority that is out of the game just like us. You are just as much of a member of the SONS than anyone else, if not more," Clay said extending his hand. I leaned over and grabbed his hand and nodded, still feeling Jax's around my waist. I stood back up straight as I saw everyone smile. "This is why I am putting to a vote to invite you to join our chapter here at Redwood. I want you to have a family and know that you have one."

My eyes widened at his declaration. I felt Jax hold me closer, looking down at him, I could just see this boyish smile. I looked across the table, everyone smiling as well. This love was so warming, something I hadn't felt since my family was alive. I watched as everyone cast their votes. Not one nay was given, making the vote unanimous. Clay slammed his gavel, making the vote official. Everyone stood up and started hugging me and shaking my hand. I ran over to Piney, who was all smiles, giving him the biggest hug.

"You deserve happiness sweetheart," he said as I continued to hug him. "Clay is right, your father would be so proud of your accomplishments. For now, let's forget what happened in Colorado and get you settled in to your new home." I looked up at Piney and gave him a kiss on his cheek.

"Thank you again, so much Piney." was all I could manage out as I looked over at Clay who was still seated with Jax. They both looked at me and smiled. I took my cut off and looked at the back, still displaying "Colorado". "I do have a favor to ask of you guys." I muster out to them. I lay my cut on the table, draped over the reaper that is carved in it. "This has been my cut since I was 18. It was custom made to me, by my mother before she left. I would like to continue to use it, instead of receiving a new one." Jax looked over at Clay, who looked like he was thinking about it.

"Because of the sentiment, I will allow it. I'll get one of the ladies out there to patch something together. For now, you can ride with one of the guys until they get it together." I smile and give Clay a hug. I look over at Jax and he's smiling ear to ear. I smiled back and walked out the Chapel. Opie took me into his arms.

"You have no idea how much my pops and I missed you kid." he said, leading me to the bar. I laughed.

"That's because your dad needs a woman touch around the cabin. I can only imagine what it looks like." I grabbed the beer from the bar, looking back at the chapel door. Jax's smile was haunting me, but in a good way. Opie clinked my beer with his, breaking my thoughts.

"Yea, well you know how the old man gets." I roll my eyes, shaking my head. Four other guys came over to join us. "Paige, this is Tig, Juice, Chibs, Bobby and Happy." he said pointing to each man. They clinked all of their glasses with mine.

"Welcome aboard, lil' lassie." the Scotsman said, tipping his head to me. I tipped mine to him as well. Bobby came right over and put his arm around me. He was about my height, just a little taller.

"It'll be nice to have a female aboard. First female Redwood member of SAMCRO. You look too sweet to be part of some motorcycle club." I swung my arm with my beer around Bobby's shoulder.

"The shit I've seen, makes the 'sweet' you see all an exterior coating. Believe me, this is the only life I know and I wouldn't trade it for anything." Happy and Tig laugh, and a short second after, everyone starts to join in.

"Do you have any new ink on you since the last time I saw you?" Happy asks. I remove my arm from Bobby, setting my beer on the counter, lifting my hoody above my head, showing my back. My back had two doves from shoulder blade to shoulder blade, looking like they're floating above the clouds with the sun peering through. The wings of the doves extended the lower part of my back.

"Each dove represents my father and brother. They're my doves in the sky, my angels." Happy nodded and smiled in approval. I straightened my hoody, grabbing my beer.

"Well, if you ever want more work done, lemme know. I'll hook you up." He said. I raised my beer and nodded my head. I walked away from them because a lot of the crow-eaters started to swarm, so that was my cue to leave. I walked over to my Dyna and ran my fingers across her gas tank. She had been my baby for 5 years, never breaking down, never giving me problems. She was a crimson red, unlike any other Dyna A SON rode. Being the only female patched member gave you some exceptions to the rules, especially when your father was the president. I set my beer on the picnic table and walked over to the ladder that looks like it leads up to the roof. Once on top, I sat sitting towards the sunset. California sunsets seemed to be the prettiest. Back in Colorado, the sunsets would be masked by the mountains, not allowing much of a view. I sat there, my knees to my chest, arms wrapped around my legs. I don't know how long I had been sitting there to not notice that there was someone sitting next to me. I saw in the corner of my eye the blonde hair.

"You stole my spot." Jax said, staring at the sunset with me. After a few short seconds, he looks over at me and smiles.

"I'm sorry; I just wanted to see the sunset from higher grounds." I looked at him and then away. Jax took a puff of his cigarette and offered it to me. Taking it, I took a drag, looking at the sunset. Beautiful, isn't it?" I asked taking another drag. I look at him and notice he's looking right at me, my heart skipping a beat."

"It really is." he said, his eyes not leaving mine. He leaned in, looking like he wanted to kiss me, but I turned away.

"Jax, I'm sorry," is all I manage out. I stand up, attempting to walk away, but he grabs my arm, dragging me down to his lap.

"Don't worry; I don't want to hurt you. One kiss, that's all I ask. After that, you can make your decision." I shake my head, but I cannot seem to stop looking at this man, a man I had just met literally 4 hours ago. My mind starts racing with thoughts, scenarios, what ifs. I shake my head, trying to get rid of them.

"Oh fuck it." I say and then I grab his face and kiss him. At first, I thought it was going to be a quick kiss, but this kiss turned into something bigger, something more magical. He grabbed my face too, deepening the kiss, feeling both of our hands wander through our hair slowly. After a minute, I pull away, panting practically over what had just transpired.