"~Oooh Hi! I'm Baldi, and this is my SCHOOL house. Promise to me that you we ALL be good. `Ookay! KYAA!" Baldi spoke with the tingglies as bright as his little Ol' bold spot.
Baldi looked excitedly at his class. They didn't seem to give him the same affections, but hopefully throughout the year, Baldi was sure that they would make for a great class. With the needed time, and effort, he was sure his students would be singing the song he liked by the end of the year.
"Now class, as we know, technology is a great way to learn. That's why we are going to be testing each and everyone of you by the use of ONLINE Quizzes!" Baldi nearly screamed with joy at the last part, bringing him to tears.
He was so VERY excited to use such a reliable and plentiful resource. Baldi handed out ipads to every student. He put a little stick that said: "You can Think Pads" as a joke alluding to the stupid and infamous 'ThinkPads' he had received when he was a youngin'. It did make him a little angry that no-one just his joke, but by now, Baldi had been used to not being heard or appreciated when he grew up. The only thing he tolerated and accepted in this god aweful world was the certainty of results. Being perfect was expected as being perfect was expected when he was a student.
"~Ookay Class! Toooday we are going to use a website called Quotev. The world is the limit, as long as it is Math, and you preform perfectly." Baldi gleemed at the front.
"Uh sir… I thing this question might be impossible to get wrong.." A student in the front row of the class dared to say to his god.
"WHAT! THERE IS NO WRONG QUESTION, ONLY WRONG PEOPLE!" Baldi roared directly into the conniving child's ear.
Baldi was on the verge of one of his meltdowns. His therapy, his own mother, had once told him the consequences of such a violent conception. He did value his mother, but knowing how the world works, it only made Baldi even angrier. Before ripping out his own mother's heart with a ruler, he had had only then realized the miracle of perfect results. The mother that had given him pain, was gone, so as a result made him feel happy. The only regret he had was not taking a selfie of the whole fiasco. Results was the reason he became a teacher, and the reason why THIS STUDENT NEEDED TO DIE.
Baldi preformed an aileron flip onto the demon of choice's hand, and used his ruler as a blunt object to sever his ear lope, but it wasn't completely clear off in the first slash. Falling to his own inadequacies, the child cried like a baby and passed out on the dark cold floor. He thought he was safe, but NOOOO~. Baldi then dawned a famous basketball jersey and he did a slam dunk to his face into the class trash-can respectfully; where people like him belong.
"Everyone…!" Baldi grinded his teeth into a sharp point near the course. "This is what happened to those who do not know how to answer questions posted by people on the internet."
Everyone in the class didn't bat an eye, no one cared about Jimmy anyway. Sucks to sucks…
"Just as a demonstation, I will personally answer this "impossible question", in order to prove to you the value of being a perfect human being." Baldi bragged his amazing into the air like a madman.
Baldi picked up the ipad slowly. The more coherent the question became, the more his smirky smile went away. He dropped it, and started to twitch. "WHAT?!" He yelled, unable to comprehend the horror he saw:
Question 20: Did you like my quiz XD
Naw, it suck dooog
Of course I did… sally (LOL)
He had never seen such a question before on a MATH quiz. Did he like it? Baldi contemplated the options. Clearly the question was a matter of opinion, but what single one would lead to the perfect result. Baldi hated it, but he would not let such a stupid question get him down.
Yes was straightforward, but having this question on the quiz contradicts its validity. B, baldi didn't fully understand, but B could be used to represent Baldi as Baldi was a beatufill man that was ALWAYS RIGHT. Maybe isn't an answer. And d is the same but mentioning some 'sally' girl, and Baldi didn't know who this mysterious sally character was. All of the questions were wrong, but one is right, Baldi didn't understand. Did sally know? Is this the crucial info that is missing in Baldi's answer?
Perhaps, but process of elimination, 'Naw, it suck doog', was the correct answer, but no correct answer would spell dog incorrectly. In fact, Baldi was confused how this question even involved dogs. Was it so complex that dog was a stepping stone in solving the answer? An intermediary step or multiple steps that involved both a dog and a girl named sally? This must be Baldi's greatest challenge yet. Even with all these know clues, Baldi didn't even know where to start. And was suck dog different than dog, or is dooog an even different variable that what Baldi originally thought?
Perhaps it's c, "maybe…", because the answer is lost to missing steps and the lack of a definitive answer makes its indefinite nature the answer all along. But where was reason, where was sally in this answer? Just simply saying that they are an unreachable feat is impossible in itself, because every question Baldi knows would never give him such a ridiculous notion to work this.
No matter where Baldi's beautiful mind went, he was no closer to solving this infinite riddle. Its very existence suggested to Baldi that he was not a perfect human being. After that day, Baldi quit being a teacher altogether. He was lost, alone, and pathetic. He made a mistake, and now he had to be punished…