He still remembers the golds and oranges of Titan's ruins, all of the colors melding with a whitened radiance.
The deep, constant sharp-sting of his injuries.
Tony remembers curling himself in, as soon as the young boy vanishes into nothingness, his knees pushing against his stomach and chest. A thin, ashy residue coats Tony's fingers and his wrist. It tastes like the nothingness. He shuts his eyes and runs his opened mouth desperately to his own bare, warm skin — just to feel Peter again. Somehow.
"You loved him."
Nebula's monotonous, softly spoken words haunt him, even after half of Earth's population returns. Thanos is defeated, and more importantly, Peter resumes his usual hectic life in Queens.
Still he needs to taste skin and ash and the warmth of another person dear to him.
Tony remembers answering her offhandedly, hollow-eyed, his lips dry and cracked and blood-smeared.
He never imagines a quiet, lone street-corner waiting for them in the near future, with Peter's dark eyes on him, his steady hands and the thunder roiling between them.
Peter inclines his head, but waits, a gentle, knowing quirk on the corner of his mouth. He ignores Tony's mumble and how he scowls faintly, to himself, meeting the chaste, beard-scratchy kiss halfway. Tony feels a pleasure-shiver crawl up his belly, when Peter moans and loosens his jaw, making light, insistent pressure with his tongue around Tony's lips.
He doesn't know where Peter learned to kiss like this, wholehearted and yet euphoric and intense, breathing frantically when they separate. They need to cool down. Tony says this, lowly and shushing a whining noise, stroking the boy's angular, pink-flushed cheeks with his thumbs.
The look Peter gives him is otherworldly, mingling amusement and grief and self-loathing.
Of course he knows it; he knows how it sits behind his teeth and lurks in the back of Tony's esophagus, burning like desire and mortification and a possessive fervor that yields no survivors.
Maybe it'll be the end of them both.
(Tony half-hopes it'll be at the same time.)
Marvel isn't mine. It's apparently Starker Week 2018 on Tumblr! I love being salty so here we go! My first try with Starker lmao aaaah! For real though people are getting on my nerves Big Time and I don't even ship this, but I'll gladly contribute to a week of positivity and try my hand at something new. If you are a Starker fan reading this,,,, hello you are valid abnd I hope this fic made you happy. If you are here just because you could be,,,,, ayyyyy what's up! Glad to see you! There wasn't a specific prompt I wanted to do and this fest is letting people do whatever if you don't wanna do prompts. If you read this, let me know! I'll wave hi!